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Search: Key Word(s): ; Posts Made By: CravenHaven
Forum: General Discussion Today, 02:42
Replies: 72
Views: 4,829
Posted By CravenHaven
Can I sue the Express for the three feet of...

Can I sue the Express for the three feet of fibreglass wool insulation I taped around the inside of my house in anticipation? Can I sell it to unsuspecting children as candy floss? The pink wool I...
Forum: General Discussion Today, 02:39
Replies: 327
Views: 5,603
Posted By CravenHaven
It's OK if you're a Mantis, does that help?

It's OK if you're a Mantis, does that help?
Forum: TV Shows: UK Today, 02:38
Replies: 10
Views: 405
Posted By CravenHaven
I've heard of powdered wigs, never powdered Owls....

I've heard of powdered wigs, never powdered Owls. Do judges wear them?
Forum: General Discussion Today, 02:33
Replies: 99
Views: 7,307
Posted By CravenHaven
Just stopped by to ask if it was being made...

Just stopped by to ask if it was being made compulsory and if I should bring my own blanket.
I stop short at the bald landlord though.
Forum: Music Today, 02:29
Replies: 10
Views: 392
Posted By CravenHaven
I hear the LSO has a very high p*ss artist...

I hear the LSO has a very high p*ss artist quotient. You want to see what they're keeping in their tubas.
Forum: General Discussion Today, 02:25
Replies: 46
Views: 882
Posted By CravenHaven
Are you askin'? I'm dancin'. Come on Liz, get...

Are you askin'? I'm dancin'. Come on Liz, get your weapon out. Someone has to and it can't be me, I'd get arrested.
Forum: General Discussion Today, 02:23
Replies: 327
Views: 5,603
Posted By CravenHaven
I'm more the pot-smoking CGAF lapsed religious...

I'm more the pot-smoking CGAF lapsed religious type. Don't tell the boss, he hasn't found out how I get rid of the smell.
Forum: General Discussion Today, 02:19
Replies: 97
Views: 2,456
Posted By CravenHaven
You mean like our friend Dave who talks about...

You mean like our friend Dave who talks about hard working families as if he would know, with all his inherited wealth from that tax haven and his Eton chums. Man of the people Dave. Oh yeah, that...
Forum: General Discussion Today, 02:12
Replies: 8
Views: 487
Posted By CravenHaven
Do keep pouring in your heartwarming slices of...

Do keep pouring in your heartwarming slices of life.
Bleh.
Forum: General Discussion Today, 02:06
Replies: 90
Views: 3,261
Posted By CravenHaven
At 1.9 inches you're probably better off sticking...

At 1.9 inches you're probably better off sticking your big toe in her. Own up! It's one of you lot, isn't it?
Mine comes off the end of a ruler.
Forum: General Discussion Today, 01:52
Replies: 33
Views: 1,113
Posted By CravenHaven
At the end, did he say "Now, don't tell me!...

At the end, did he say "Now, don't tell me! You're St. Peter?!"?
Oh sorry, wrong Bond.
Forum: Showbiz Yesterday, 20:13
Replies: 10
Views: 641
Posted By CravenHaven
In breaking news, the Pope was found lurking near...

In breaking news, the Pope was found lurking near the Vatican and bears were not found shopping for Andrex.
Forum: Showbiz Yesterday, 20:05
Replies: 27
Views: 1,186
Posted By CravenHaven
He's shaved his eyebrows and drawn them in. Some...

He's shaved his eyebrows and drawn them in. Some of us just stick to our colouring books.
Forum: Showbiz Yesterday, 20:04
Replies: 114
Views: 12,347
Posted By CravenHaven
This is the showbiz equivalent of saying your...

This is the showbiz equivalent of saying your partner was driving your speeding car, isn't it ;)
Forum: General Discussion Yesterday, 20:02
Replies: 126
Views: 4,556
Posted By CravenHaven
"Turns my stomach."

"Turns my stomach."
Forum: General Discussion 01-03-2015, 21:04
Replies: 126
Views: 4,556
Posted By CravenHaven
Why would you hold anybody's hand, unless you...

Why would you hold anybody's hand, unless you thought you might lose them?
Forum: General Discussion 01-03-2015, 20:31
Replies: 126
Views: 4,556
Posted By CravenHaven
anything which gets in the way of my sliding...

anything which gets in the way of my sliding along the shiny supermarket floors in my heelys is my enemy, so thumbs up OP. I think the way to solve this is turnstiles.
Forum: General Discussion 01-03-2015, 20:09
Replies: 16
Views: 600
Posted By CravenHaven
Yes. Look for the one with the brown nose. He can...

Yes. Look for the one with the brown nose. He can be found hanging round the office and praising the boss for his whizzo ideas.
Forum: General Discussion 28-02-2015, 22:16
Replies: 21
Views: 461
Posted By CravenHaven
If the future is as dull as Deep S*** Nine, I'd...

If the future is as dull as Deep S*** Nine, I'd rather be a chimney sweep
Forum: General Discussion 28-02-2015, 22:10
Replies: 18
Views: 700
Posted By CravenHaven
Stuff that.

Stuff that.
Forum: General Discussion 28-02-2015, 22:08
Replies: 21
Views: 461
Posted By CravenHaven
We come in peace (shoot to kill, shoot to kill)

We come in peace (shoot to kill, shoot to kill)
Forum: General Discussion 28-02-2015, 10:22
Replies: 167
Views: 6,330
Posted By CravenHaven
I think it's on horses.

I think it's on horses.
Forum: General Discussion 28-02-2015, 09:13
Replies: 167
Views: 6,330
Posted By CravenHaven
No chocolate starfish then?

No chocolate starfish then?
Forum: General Discussion 28-02-2015, 08:41
Replies: 46
Views: 2,761
Posted By CravenHaven
if you were born out of wedlock it would be super...

if you were born out of wedlock it would be super easy to find out that name from public records
I prefer "What was the first biscuit you dunked without it breaking?". I remember that.
Forum: General Discussion 28-02-2015, 08:35
Replies: 34
Views: 1,075
Posted By CravenHaven
I know. I couldn't possibly eat a whole one. I...

I know. I couldn't possibly eat a whole one. I prefer mashed Haggis.
Showing results 1 to 25 of 494

 
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