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Old 01-02-2013, 12:23
wilehelmas
Forum Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2011
Posts: 2,221
Popbitch weighs in:

>> Kiss and sell <<
The horror of cameraphones

Afraid Leveson has quashed your
chances of getting your kiss and
tell story sold? Worry not. With
their latest scoop that Zayn from
One Direction might have shagged
someone other than his girlfriend,
the Sun on Sunday have mapped out
a new framework.

The sequence of events you need
to follow is this:

* Hang out around the popstar
of your choice.
* Perform a sex act on them.
* When they suggest they call
you a taxi, perform a second
sex act on them.
* Once both performances are
complete, Google them.
* Get so outraged by Google
telling you that said popstar
has a girl/boyfriend you feel
compelled to take a picture of
them while they sleep.
* Just by chance, the photos you
take are of distinguishing marks
(like tattoos) so the media
find them acceptable as proof.
* Take your story to a tabloid
who will publish the shots worked
into a "Won't Somebody Think Of The
Girlfriends?!" campaign.
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