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Old 15-04-2013, 14:32
elnombre
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Join Date: Feb 2010
Posts: 2,862
Assuming that this walnut-faced pube-haired gurn on a stick began having sex at the age of 14, given he's now 24, that gives us 10 years of sexual activity.

Given he claims to have 'stopped' when in 'serious relationships' and given that for a relationship to be considered serious I think we can reasonably say it has to have lasted at least 3 months and upward. He says 'serious relationships' as a plural, so let's take a conservative estimate and shave 2 years for times when he was in a monogamous relationship.

Even this Wayne-Rooney-looking-in-the-back-of-a-spoon-alike lothario must get ill some of the time (weeping sores around the genitals, for instance), so let's knock 6 further months off for illness, rest, penile-reattachment surgery etc.

That leaves us with 7 years and 6 months, so roughly one new conquest every 2.7 days.

What can we possibly declare other than that this charmingly gormless belm-mugged Casanova of the 21st century is a very discerning young man. Or a lying halfwit. I'm undecided.
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