Is Tom Daley Gay

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  • AddisonianAddisonian Posts: 16,377
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    BomoLad wrote: »
    THe mere fact that people attack those for openly speculating on someone's private life yet ONLY when it refers to homosexuality is a clear indication of a taboo.

    Sorry to labour the point but one of the very first posts in the thread speculated he was heterosexual and was ignored. You can't say that homosexuality isn't a taboo when the only reaction is caused by those who suggest he might be gay.

    In fact, I didn't even suggest he might be gay, I said I'd be surprised if he wasn't. Someone else stated their belief that his sexuality is 'confirmed'. But because the indication was that he was straight - nobody paid any attention.

    A post made suggesting someone would be surprised if he wasn't gay (by comparison if milder insinuation) is pulled apart by people denying that the subject is 'taboo'.
    To be fair, you were the one who started 'pulling apart' posts when someone dared to say they didn't care about his sexuality, only his diving skills. You then asked what is so interesting about his diving skills, deliberately trying to de-rail the conversation back onto his supposed homosexuality so that you can make yet another issue out of it and try and find homophobia where it doesn't exist.
  • dorydaryldorydaryl Posts: 15,927
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    I AM interested in Tom Daley's diving capabilities as I've followed his achievements since he was a kid. I am not interested in his sexuality. I couldn't care less if he's straight or gay. I don't think that if he is gay that it's an issue that should be 'swept under the carpet' or taboo. I really don't give a damn. I just think that it's his business unless he decides to state otherwise. He's still quite young and might not know himself just yet.
  • HenryBaneHenryBane Posts: 4,427
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    dorydaryl wrote: »
    I AM interested in Tom Daley's diving capabilities as I've followed his achievements since he was a kid. I am not interested in his sexuality. I couldn't care less if he's straight or gay. I don't think that if he is gay that it's an issue that should be 'swept under the carpet' or taboo. I really don't give a damn. I just think that it's his business unless he decides to state otherwise. He's still quite young and might not know himself just yet.

    And there may be nothing to know. You can get camp sounding straight guys, Duncan Norvelle had a very successful career in the 80s and 90s as one.
  • BomoLadBomoLad Posts: 17,821
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    If a thread was started 'Does Tom Daley have a girlfriend' and my first response was 'No, I think he's gay', which element of that do you all honestly think would have attracted the most criticism and responses?

    Ask yourself this question honestly and if you respond with 'We all would have been outraged that someone suggested he was straight' - go look up the definition of the word honest.

    It's not a surprise it's a reality of society that these issues are 'dealt with' like this. It isn't intended homophobia but if you notice this reality, it's hard not to suspect there are undertones of it. Perhaps not intentionally but there is a marked difference in how we are permitted to utilise homosexuality and heterosexuality these scenarios.

    'Is he gay?' is always considered far more taboo and unworthy of public discussion than 'Is he straight?'
  • Chester666666Chester666666 Posts: 9,020
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    I don't bother speculating about anyones sexuality, I can see why some do or may want to but it's not my cup of tea to speculate
  • BomoLadBomoLad Posts: 17,821
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    I don't bother speculating about anyones sexuality, I can see why some do or may want to but it's not my cup of tea to speculate

    That's fine.

    To answer a question that's not been asked but which would be evident by my response - I think having young, popular, successful, gay role models is useful.

    It's like if we imagined a time before television or access to visual media. It would be important for young black or young asian (or whatever) children to know the singer they heard on the radio was black or asian.

    Doesn't impact upon their talent or their value as a performer, but to know is often useful. Particularly if you're talking about a group of people facing societal difficulties.
  • Pumping IronPumping Iron Posts: 29,891
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    BomoLad wrote: »
    My post wasn't the first in the thread either, but it's getting the most heat.

    I merely said I'd be surprised and disappointed if he wasn't.

    I didn't say 'Yes he has a boyfriend, I think'

    Heaven knows what the response would have been if I did. I suspect a lot more heated than they have been although I'd have said nothing different to the person whose post has gone completely ignored by everyone except me.

    One person speculated he might be straight.

    That's the difference.

    You're getting the most heat as you're the one who is being unreasonable. Your're the one nit-picking at other peoples posts and trying to find homophobia when there is none.
  • lemoncurdlemoncurd Posts: 57,778
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    BomoLad wrote: »
    If a thread was started 'Does Tom Daley have a girlfriend' and my first response was 'No, I think he's gay', which element of that do you all honestly think would have attracted the most criticism and responses?

    Ask yourself this question honestly and if you respond with 'We all would have been outraged that someone suggested he was straight' - go look up the definition of the word honest.

    It's not a surprise it's a reality of society that these issues are 'dealt with' like this. It isn't intended homophobia but if you notice this reality, it's hard not to suspect there are undertones of it. Perhaps not intentionally but there is a marked difference in how we are permitted to utilise homosexuality and heterosexuality these scenarios.

    'Is he gay?' is always considered far more taboo and unworthy of public discussion than 'Is he straight?'

    It's just a British thing, I think, not to want to know about people's private lives. It's the same reason why people who speculate on the wealth of others are seen as vulgar.
  • HenryBaneHenryBane Posts: 4,427
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    BomoLad wrote: »
    That's fine.

    To answer a question that's not been asked but which would be evident by my response - I think having young, popular, successful, gay role models is useful.

    Then be one yourself and leave other people to do what they want.
  • BomoLadBomoLad Posts: 17,821
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    lemoncurd wrote: »
    It's just a British thing, I think, not to want to know about people's private lives. It's the same reason why people who speculate on the wealth of others are seen as vulgar.

    I've considered this but rejected it. At least for here. There isn't a poster here who hasn't divulged into speculation into someone's personal affairs in some guise. Yet it's routinely only homosexuality that gets the 'It shouldn't be mentioned' replies.
  • dorydaryldorydaryl Posts: 15,927
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    HenryBane wrote: »
    And there may be nothing to know. You can get camp sounding straight guys, Duncan Norvelle had a very successful career in the 80s and 90s as one.

    Absolutely. I know a few myself.;)
  • BomoLadBomoLad Posts: 17,821
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    HenryBane wrote: »
    Then be one yourself and leave other people to do what they want.

    Yes because heterosexuality is the only form of love that should ever be referred to in a public forum.

    'That's not what I said'

    ...it is.
  • Pumping IronPumping Iron Posts: 29,891
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    BomoLad wrote: »
    That's fine.

    To answer a question that's not been asked but which would be evident by my response - I think having young, popular, successful, gay role models is useful.

    It's like if we imagined a time before television or access to visual media. It would be important for young black or young asian (or whatever) children to know the singer they heard on the radio was black or asian.

    Doesn't impact upon their talent or their value as a performer, but to know is often useful. Particularly if you're talking about a group of people facing societal difficulties.


    I agree having a role model is a good thing, but you stated you hoped he was gay as you want to have sex with him and would be disappointed if not. Either way it doesn't matter as you will never have sex with him. You are confusing 'role model' and 'fantasy'.

    Infact what do you think Tom would prefer to be a role model for? His sporting achievements or who he sleeps with in his private life (whether man/woman or both)?
  • HenryBaneHenryBane Posts: 4,427
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    dorydaryl wrote: »
    Absolutely. I know a few myself.;)

    Oh like you know straight men are gay after six pints I suppose. It doesn't really do anything for acceptance when you accuse straight people of hiding their homosexuality.
  • stargazer61stargazer61 Posts: 70,910
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    BomoLad wrote: »
    That's fine.

    To answer a question that's not been asked but which would be evident by my response - I think having young, popular, successful, gay role models is useful.

    It's like if we imagined a time before television or access to visual media. It would be important for young black or young asian (or whatever) children to know the singer they heard on the radio was black or asian.

    Doesn't impact upon their talent or their value as a performer, but to know is often useful. Particularly if you're talking about a group of people facing societal difficulties.

    That is fine, and I would agree but it is up to the individual concerned if they want to let their sexuality (or any other aspect of their life) be known. If they do not. that is their choice, and should be respected.
  • HenryBaneHenryBane Posts: 4,427
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    BomoLad wrote: »
    Yes because heterosexuality is the only form of love that should ever be referred to in a public forum.

    'That's not what I said'

    ...it is.

    What are you on about? If you want gay role models, get off your computer and go be one, stop trying to suggest some guy is gay for your own agenda.
  • AddisonianAddisonian Posts: 16,377
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    BomoLad wrote: »
    I've considered this but rejected it. At least for here. There isn't a poster here who hasn't divulged into speculation into someone's personal affairs in some guise. Yet it's routinely only homosexuality that gets the 'It shouldn't be mentioned' replies.
    Once again, people don't care if you speculate about someone being gay.
    As far as I can see it, you are getting some flack in this thread because you are the one making an issue out of it. You seem to be shocked that most people couldn't give a monkeys whether this bloke is gay, straight, bi or whatever. I had no idea who he is but I gather that he is a professional diver. Some people have said they are only interested in his diving skills - what's up with that?
    Not caring about someone's sexual orientation is not being homophobic.

    Im not saying homophobia doesnt exit but seriously, stop trying to find homophobia in everything - I've seen you do this in other threads in the past too. If you go through your life like that then I'm afraid you're going to be very unhappy.
  • BomoLadBomoLad Posts: 17,821
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    I sometimes wonder what people's names are. Some people 'look like' a Daryl or a Keith. I sometimes wonder what accent the person I'm talking to has. Yorkshire/Lancashire can be quite difficult to tell, for me anyway. I sometimes wonder if my friend's baby will be a boy or a girl. I wonder if my other friend will ever meet someone. I also wonder what his type is because I occasionally try to play 'match-maker' with him, sometimes to disastrous consequences. If I invite someone to dinner I first try to speculate as to what they might wish to eat and if I am able to accommodate that. I often see two people walking together looking borderline affectionate and wonder if they're a couple or just good friends.



    .....don't we all?



    But homosexuality? Oh my GOD how dare I even begin to think it's any of my business. We should all just ignore it, never speak of it and confound us if we dare to speculate. Good god, that would never do!
  • ÆnimaÆnima Posts: 38,548
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    BomoLad wrote: »
    I've considered this but rejected it. At least for here. There isn't a poster here who hasn't divulged into speculation into someone's personal affairs in some guise. Yet it's routinely only homosexuality that gets the 'It shouldn't be mentioned' replies.

    I see that more as people trying not to sound at all homophobic personally. They are saying 'it shouldn't matter' basically. Maybe they go overboard compared to other activities- but some people are very easily offended when it comes to their sexuality, so people just consider it most polite to say it's a private issue.
  • lemoncurdlemoncurd Posts: 57,778
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    I agree having a role model is a good thing, but you stated you hoped he was gay as you want to have sex with him and would be disappointed if not. Either way it doesn't matter as you will never have sex with him. You are confusing 'role model' and 'fantasy'.

    On the particular issue of role-models, I often find it odd what people laud as a role-model. Tom Daley IS a role model, because he shows what putting in a lot of effort and time can achieve, and it is important for young people to emulate that. His sexuality, on the other hand, would not, in my opinion, have a bearing on his status as a role-model, because sexuality is an innate part of one's being; it is not an achievement. If he were gay and that somehow affect his ability to dive, then maybe. Or if he had helped advance rights for gay people, then maybe. But sexual preference alone doth not a role-model make.
  • Chester666666Chester666666 Posts: 9,020
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    BomoLad wrote: »
    That's fine.

    To answer a question that's not been asked but which would be evident by my response - I think having young, popular, successful, gay role models is useful.

    It's like if we imagined a time before television or access to visual media. It would be important for young black or young asian (or whatever) children to know the singer they heard on the radio was black or asian.

    Doesn't impact upon their talent or their value as a performer, but to know is often useful. Particularly if you're talking about a group of people facing societal difficulties.

    True
    I was happy about the rugby player and others who come out and aren't stereotypes, it's useful to have role models who show that you can be accepted without the idiocy of many.
  • Pumping IronPumping Iron Posts: 29,891
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    BomoLad wrote: »
    I sometimes wonder what people's names are. Some people 'look like' a Daryl or a Keith. I sometimes wonder what accent the person I'm talking to has. Yorkshire/Lancashire can be quite difficult to tell, for me anyway. I sometimes wonder if my friend's baby will be a boy or a girl. I wonder if my other friend will ever meet someone. I also wonder what his type is because I occasionally try to play 'match-maker' with him, sometimes to disastrous consequences. If I invite someone to dinner I first try to speculate as to what they might wish to eat and if I am able to accommodate that. I often see two people walking together looking borderline affectionate and wonder if they're a couple or just good friends.



    .....don't we all?



    But homosexuality? Oh my GOD how dare I even begin to think it's any of my business. We should all just ignore it, never speak of it and confound us if we dare to speculate. Good god, that would never do!

    Oh dear. You're really scraping the bottom of the barrel now. Pathetic.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 14,284
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    Gay or straight; I have as much of a chance of scoring with Tom Daley as I do of sprouting wings and flying to the moon. He is smoking hot though and I look forward to perving over him in the Olympics. I'll cheer him on unless he's diving against an American.
  • ListentomeListentome Posts: 9,804
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    BomoLad wrote: »
    See this is the problem. As soon as homosexuality is mentioned 'it's none of your business. Stop talking about it. Who cares!!!"

    ....and so on.

    To be fair there are plenty of threads speculating as to known heterosexual people's private lives, work lives, financial lives and some posters write "its none of your business...". Its not exclusive to gay themed threads. But as this is a gay themed thread it is only natural someone will write "its none of your business." That's not to say it is taboo, just the poster's personal preference not to speculate as to someone's private affairs.

    Not to mention the number of threads on DS about possible gay celebrities would suggest few think it is a taboo subject.

    As a gay man, I might sometimes speculate as to a person's sexuality, but I don't take offense if another person doesn't want to. I'll save my frustration for out and out bigots.

    best
  • CreamteaCreamtea Posts: 14,682
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    He does have a touch of the Colin Jacksons about him.
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