[Bigfeet]

A two-year-long, 178-page report that cost taxpayers £500,000 has arrived at the unsurprising conclusion that commuters want trains to run on time.

The biggest-ever study of overcrowding and the punctuality of trains, commissioned by the Rail Safety and Standards Board (RSSB), has been condemned as "an astonishing exercise in rehashing the blindingly obvious".

The report for the RSSB, which is funded by the Department for Transport to the tune of £12million every year, discovered that passengers are likely to be in a "positive emotional state" if their train is punctual and announcements are audible and comprehensible, and in a "negative" frame of mind if the service is late and no one tells them why.

Commuters are "chilled out and happy" if they get a seat on a train, but their mood turns to "panic" if the train is late and there is no seat, the research found.

The study, undertaken by a team of external consultants and psychologists, analysed travellers all over Britain and used an "undercover passenger" carrying a miniature video camera concealed in a gift-wrapped cardboard tube inside a carrier bag to record travellers' behaviour.

Ha ha ha ha - fantastic - I've been roaring with laughter reading this, and even had to check that I was reading the right newspaper and not a spoof one, particularly when I got to the end of the article:

The report comes just a week after the Department for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs was attacked for spending £300,000 on a three-year study that proved ducks liked rainy weather.

Brilliant, just brilliant .

Link here.

[Bigfeet]

Shamelessly bumped, just because I think that it's a funny story .

[DinkyDoobie]

While i understand the importance of understanding things, why does noone stop and say, hey! maybe we could be researching something more important.

[blueblade]

It needs expenditure of £500k just to tell us the blindingly obvious, wrapped up in a fancy wordy report ?

Unreal, absolutely unreal.

[Lushness]

£500K? Seriously?

Christ on a bike...

[paddysu]

Even if they have got a seat on the train I'm not sure that the communter is particularly chilled and happy, they've probably had to run to the station and down the platform when it was announced at the last minute dropped they bags to finally find that last seat to sit in.

Just think how many MP's expenses that report staing what I think everyone knew could have paid.

[DinkyDoobie]

I think we need a report on what taxpayers think of mp's expenses, a review of the results and finally an agency to ensure the expenses are being dispensed according to the rules.

Did i mention this would all be funded by the tax payers?

[indianwells]

I don't think it's funny. I'm bloody angry that our money is being thrown down the drain on crap like this.

[blueblade]

Originally Posted by indianwells

I don't think it's funny. I'm bloody angry that our money is being thrown down the drain on crap like this.

Yep, me too. In fact our money is being chucked down the toilet pan, on useless projects, irritating initiatives, and trousered by greedy freeloaders ~ but guess what, us mugs get no say in it whatever.

Time we started getting nasty & forcibly reminding this bunch of gangsters and incompetent control freaks, who's really in charge.

[boksbox]

Originally Posted by Bigfeet

Shamelessly bumped, just because I think that it's a funny story .

Sounds like typical lazy journalism to me, contrive a headline then work bacwards.

[kibblerok]

Originally Posted by boksbox

Sounds like typical lazy journalism to me, contrive a headline then work bacwards.

How so?

[CatCo]

Reading the opening post, I have to admit that I found it very funny too. Then I had a look at the website for the RSSB and suddenly it didn't seem so funny after all.
This is what the website says about the RSSB;

RSSB is a not for profit company owned by major industry stakeholders. The company is limited by guarantee and is governed by its Members, a Board and an advisory committee. (my bold)

Bearing that in mind, why is the tax payer funding them to the tune of 12 million per year?
Also, since the tax payer is funding them, shouldn't we get some say over who gets the (apparently rather lucrative) jobs? I admit that I'm not great with company accounts but the chair and executive committee of this lot appear to be on quite a decent amount of money, if the yearly accounts are anything to go by. (Happy to be corrected on this by someone who understands accounts better than I do.)

In the Civil Service all jobs have to be put to 'fair and open competition'. Is this happening in the RSSB?

[bluebird007]

Moronic report. It's even worse than that London Olympics 2012 logo costing six figures.

[godzilla55]

£500,000 for that what a waste and 2 years to say that.

****ING SAD LIBERAL LOSERS

Originally Posted by bluebird007

Moronic report. It's even worse than that London Olympics 2012 logo costing six figures.

True. The only part of the Olympic project I disagreed with in any capacity.

But let's be honest - if it gets the message across to the government that we want trains to run on time, it can only do good.

Originally Posted by Bigfeet

Shamelessly bumped, just because I think that it's a funny story .

Indeed it was.

[lemoncurd]

Originally Posted by godzilla55

£500,000 for that what a waste and 2 years to say that.

****ING SAD LIBERAL LOSERS

Umm....it's Labour who commissioned it, not the Liberals.
Apart from that.....carry on!

[jmclaugh]

You have to laugh. £500,000 to tell everyone what they already know, well done the £12m p.a. RSSB, perhaps they could do something do useful like figger out why the trains don't run on time. Oh wait that may be a bit like hard work.

The report on ducks is surreal, it's the sort of thing you'd expect to have seen on Yes Minister. Isn't it good fun spending other peoples' money.

[Bigfeet]

Originally Posted by jmclaugh

You have to laugh. £500,000 to tell everyone what they already know, well done the £12m p.a. RSSB, perhaps they could do something do useful like figger out why the trains don't run on time. Oh wait that may be a bit like hard work.

The report on ducks is surreal, it's the sort of thing you'd expect to have seen on Yes Minister. Isn't it good fun spending other peoples' money.

Ha ha ha - you're right jmclaugh - isn't it just .

[skp20040]

I think I am going to offer my services for say £1 million to find out if people would like higher wages.

Originally Posted by skp20040

I think I am going to offer my services for say £1 million to find out if people would like higher wages.

I'll give you my opinion on that if you give me a cut of your £1m.