Digital Spy

Search Digital Spy
 

DS Forums

 
 

Simon Cowell is he or isn't he??? (Part 2)


Reply
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Old 26-10-2010, 16:11
allie5
Guest
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 4,515
I hope America knows what it's let themselves in for. Bongos, squiggly & diddly's randon appearences and male judges trying to out camp each other. Extra points if Brian brings back those roller skaters 'who couldn't skate'. We might not have the best singers, but we know entertainment. This show is so Ryan, he would love it.
After last years comatose Idol Season, America is ready for X Factor and its shedload of campy fabulousness. Simon and Ryan at opposing ends of the panel with a couple of token "chicks" inbetween they can pretend to flirt with, whilst they trade gay innuendo and have fake spats over the acts that no-one is interested in over the desk...just what SUPERB TV that would be eh? Brian also has to be shipped over , along with his Perspex Steps of doom, his wardrobe of stretchy lycra costumes, a containers worth of glittery tickertape and enough pyrotechnics to ignite Paula Abduls alcohol fumed breath (assuming she gets a spot on the panel). God, it will be bloody amazing.

Who is interested in the likes of Lee Dewyze who could just about hold a note but was as interesting as Paris Hiltons fingernail? Brazillian sex pests with medallions and the ability to mash up the Spice Girls and Ricky Martin is the future of TV . Ryan is SO suited to the X Factor it would be a complete crime against television if he wasnt on it in some shape or form.

Are you listening Simon???
allie5 is offline   Reply With Quote
Please sign in or register to remove this advertisement.
Old 26-10-2010, 16:14
Agent Krycek
Forum Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Stalking David and Neal
Posts: 32,848
After last years comatose Idol Season, America is ready for X Factor and its shedload of campy fabulousness. Simon and Ryan at opposing ends of the panel with a couple of token "chicks" inbetween they can pretend to flirt with, whilst they trade gay innuendo and have fake spats over the acts that no-one is interested in over the desk...just what SUPERB TV that would be eh? Brian also has to be shipped over , along with his Perspex Steps of doom, his wardrobe of stretchy lycra costumes, a containers worth of glittery tickertape and enough pyrotechnics to ignite Paula Abduls alcohol fumed breath (assuming she gets a spot on the panel). God, it will be bloody amazing.

Who is interested in the likes of Lee Dewyze who could just about hold a note but was as interesting as Paris Hiltons fingernail? Brazillian sex pests with medallions and the ability to mash up the Spice Girls and Ricky Martin is the future of TV . Ryan is SO suited to the X Factor it would be a complete crime against television if he wasnt on it in some shape or form.

Are you listening Simon???
I'd dispute he could even manage that (Seriously, how on earth did he win Out of tune, off pitch week after week and not exactly scoring highly in the looks department
Agent Krycek is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 26-10-2010, 16:23
Mrs BBV
Forum Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Posts: 2,572
He certainly has a beard type
Oooh part deux. Marvellous news and congrats to all. **Mwah Mwah**

Now on the subject of piccy 2, I'm 'smitten' with mystery brunette'. She has cheap clothes, cheap accessories (she obviously not out to fleece SC for all she can get, well not yet anyway) and what a lovely, warm, genuine smile.

Unlike Kerching who I hear has just signed herself up to study for a degree in Open Cast Mining (to help with her gold digging) and is as we speak conducting a very through inventory of Chez Cowell in La La land so see what she can snaffle before MC makes it official.
Mrs BBV is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 26-10-2010, 16:24
Tulip19
Forum Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Posts: 2,763
We're sorry Dexy
Tulip19 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 26-10-2010, 16:29
MICH78
Forum Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 2,048
This wouldn't even be like a job for Ryan. Trading insults and giggling with Simon is how he passes his time anyway. If it comes down to a contract wrangle preventing Ryan from doing XF, then he should just do it for free!

Or if Simon wants to earn a few more dollars towards his next 'ex girlfriend' pay off, he could do a phone vote on who gets a place on the panel. I'm prepared to shell out for Ry.
MICH78 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 26-10-2010, 16:34
allie5
Guest
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 4,515
This wouldn't even be like a job for Ryan. Trading insults and giggling with Simon is how he passes his time anyway. If it comes down to a contract wrangle preventing Ryan from doing XF, then he should just do it for free!

Or if Simon wants to earn a few more dollars towards his next 'ex girlfriend' pay off, he could do a phone vote on who gets a place on the panel. I'm prepared to shell out for Ry.
Now thats inspired! There could be "Judge Idol" as a little warm up show for X Factor - obviously Si is IN (which is nothing new ) but all the other spots are up for grabs - let the public decide - Id spend my last pennies on a vote for Ry Guy too.
allie5 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 26-10-2010, 16:39
allie5
Guest
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 4,515
Oooh part deux. Marvellous news and congrats to all. **Mwah Mwah**

Now on the subject of piccy 2, I'm 'smitten' with mystery brunette'. She has cheap clothes, cheap accessories (she obviously not out to fleece SC for all she can get, well not yet anyway) and what a lovely, warm, genuine smile.

Unlike Kerching who I hear has just signed herself up to study for a degree in Open Cast Mining (to help with her gold digging) and is as we speak conducting a very through inventory of Chez Cowell in La La land so see what she can snaffle before MC makes it official.
Oh Mrs B you do make me giggle.... I bet you are spot on -Kerching has been round Cowell Mansions, supermarket sweep style, going wild in the aisles chucking anything of value into her packing boxes. I'll be keeping an eye on ebay for a suspicious lot of tight white slash grey T shirts, pointy boots and Armani jeans with slightly shredded hems. Might be worth picking up a Los Angeles Auto Trader in case a cheap Bugatti Veyron appears for sale as well
allie5 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 26-10-2010, 16:48
MICH78
Forum Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 2,048
Oh Mrs B you do make me giggle.... I bet you are spot on -Kerching has been round Cowell Mansions, supermarket sweep style, going wild in the aisles chucking anything of value into her packing boxes.
If she takes that awful threadbare grey tshirt, all is forgiven!
MICH78 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 26-10-2010, 16:52
dexydal
Guest
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Posts: 1,389
If she takes that awful threadbare grey tshirt, all is forgiven!
And the cardi, please don't forget to take the cardi.
dexydal is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 26-10-2010, 16:56
allie5
Guest
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 4,515
And the cardi, please don't forget to take the cardi.
Id bid on that on ebay - then we could have a Cardi-Burning ceremony

Its been chilly this week - I fear we might get some dreaded cardie -sightings at Fountain before the week is out.

A man who owns a Ferrari California should NOT be seen dead in that fashion abomination....
allie5 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 27-10-2010, 10:33
allie5
Guest
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 4,515
Max must be bloody desperate flogging this dead horse....

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage...ants-kids.html

What an absolutely HUGE steaming pile of poo. Kerching hasnt even been here since Dannii was back and even if she was, how does a FORTY SOMETHING woman suddenly decide from cuddling a random sprog that she suddenly wants children? Its just so fricking unbelievable....can even The Sun readers be THAT thick to swallow this???? The cynic in me thinks they are trying rather too hard to convince us that Kerching isnt dumped yet?
allie5 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 27-10-2010, 10:41
Agent Krycek
Forum Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Stalking David and Neal
Posts: 32,848
Max must be bloody desperate flogging this dead horse....

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage...ants-kids.html

What an absolutely HUGE steaming pile of poo. Kerching hasnt even been here since Dannii was back and even if she was, how does a FORTY SOMETHING woman suddenly decide from cuddling a random sprog that she suddenly wants children? Its just so fricking unbelievable....can even The Sun readers be THAT thick to swallow this???? The cynic in me thinks they are trying rather too hard to convince us that Kerching isnt dumped yet?
Timings wrong for dumpage (and contracts are probably still being negotiated )- if Cheryl does get the US XF gig (and that will be down to TPTB at Fox) then dumpage will happen just before publicity starts for the show, then Simon will be 'comforted' by Cheryl during auditions, sparking rumours of a romance and we'll have a whole 'are they/aren't they' commentary to boost publicity for XF and introduce Cheryl to the US.
Agent Krycek is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 27-10-2010, 11:04
allie5
Guest
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 4,515
Well the Daily Mail obviously didnt get the memo from Max

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz...=feeds-newsxml

They are still peddling the "Its all over bar the shouting" theory....maybe Mr Clifford should start earning his crust and co-ordinate the stories in the tabloids??? One minute Kerching is practically laying with her legs in the air awaiting the turkey baster , the next she is sulking in LA with only her new booblies and Louis Vuitton luggage for company .
allie5 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 27-10-2010, 11:36
maureens
Forum Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Yorkshire
Posts: 12,536
Timings wrong for dumpage (and contracts are probably still being negotiated )- if Cheryl does get the US XF gig (and that will be down to TPTB at Fox) then dumpage will happen just before publicity starts for the show, then Simon will be 'comforted' by Cheryl during auditions, sparking rumours of a romance and we'll have a whole 'are they/aren't they' commentary to boost publicity for XF and introduce Cheryl to the US.
i have thought this also, about Cole, she is happy to go along with the are they arnt they bollox as she is that desperate to get in the US, she will do anything(eg be a beard) im surprised he actually bothers with Dannii behind the scenes as he cant even look at her when the camera's are on, so the baby story im sure is the usual crap, to hetro up Simon a bit more
maureens is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 27-10-2010, 11:50
maureens
Forum Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Yorkshire
Posts: 12,536
Well the Daily Mail obviously didnt get the memo from Max

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz...=feeds-newsxml

They are still peddling the "Its all over bar the shouting" theory....maybe Mr Clifford should start earning his crust and co-ordinate the stories in the tabloids??? One minute Kerching is practically laying with her legs in the air awaiting the turkey baster , the next she is sulking in LA with only her new booblies and Louis Vuitton luggage for company .
the laying with the legs in the air awaiting the turkey baster, did this to me
maureens is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 27-10-2010, 11:55
shaggy_x
Forum Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Deep South (Yorkshire)
Posts: 2,995
the laying with the legs in the air awaiting the turkey baster, did this to me
I'll expect to see her on the Jamie Oliver xmas special then
shaggy_x is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 27-10-2010, 11:56
Agent Krycek
Forum Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Stalking David and Neal
Posts: 32,848
i have thought this also, about Cole, she is happy to go along with the are they arnt they bollox as she is that desperate to get in the US, she will do anything(eg be a beard) im surprised he actually bothers with Dannii behind the scenes as he cant even look at her when the camera's are on, so the baby story im sure is the usual crap, to hetro up Simon a bit more
Dannii's no good to him - happy, stable relationship plus baby. Cheryl's the way to go. I doubt they thought The One would work out so badly, she's known Cowell for years and seemed an ideal choice (still think it was a double bearding operation - an earlier fling with Clay A, please ), but they have as much chemistry together as a brick, a nice little fauxmance with Cheryl ticks all the boxes for both the X Factor and Cheryl breaking the States.
Agent Krycek is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 27-10-2010, 12:25
jujubee
Forum Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Posts: 2,417
http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage...ants-kids.html


LMAO. Nice try, Max. Nothing like using a half joking comment by Simon SEVEN months ago..
jujubee is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 27-10-2010, 15:01
Mrs BBV
Forum Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Posts: 2,572
http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage...ants-kids.html


LMAO. Nice try, Max. Nothing like using a half joking comment by Simon SEVEN months ago..
And we know that when Terri tried that trick he told her to get a terrapin.
Mrs BBV is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 28-10-2010, 04:20
DorisMorris
Forum Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Offshore. OK, near the Thames.
Posts: 2,256
lol so we have 2 plausible theories - she's a TV exec.....,

or, she's a beard-in-waiting.
...a mere moustache?


(love reading this thread )
DorisMorris is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 28-10-2010, 09:01
IvanIV
Forum Member
 
Join Date: May 2006
Posts: 21,185
Dannii's no good to him - happy, stable relationship plus baby. Cheryl's the way to go. I doubt they thought The One would work out so badly, she's known Cowell for years and seemed an ideal choice (still think it was a double bearding operation - an earlier fling with Clay A, please ), but they have as much chemistry together as a brick, a nice little fauxmance with Cheryl ticks all the boxes for both the X Factor and Cheryl breaking the States.
Yeah, smitten or not, it's been a PR disaster, even his own mother now would probably rather see him hitched with Ryan than The One. Time to shave off the beard and get another one.
IvanIV is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 29-10-2010, 13:39
jujubee
Forum Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Posts: 2,417
So is she in London or not? If she's not, those "Mez wants a baby after seeing Ethan!" stories are going to look even dumber than they already are.
jujubee is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 29-10-2010, 16:36
shaggy_x
Forum Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Deep South (Yorkshire)
Posts: 2,995
Yeah, smitten or not, it's been a PR disaster, even his own mother now would probably rather see him hitched with Ryan than The One. Time to shave off the beard and get another one.
the beard is here to stay , at least until the US launch of X Factor. Possibilities to get rid of her include her not being able to take on a job on the set because 'of other commitments' ...

Damn. Im giving Max too many ideas here.

shaggy_x is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-11-2010, 11:14
allie5
Guest
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 4,515
Jack Dee makes a pretty close to the mark (well, for prime time telly anyway ) remark about Simon's sexuality on Never Mind The Buzzcocks this week.

Still on iplayer if anyone wants to watch.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode..._24_Episode_3/
allie5 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-11-2010, 11:26
jujubee
Forum Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Posts: 2,417
LOL!

http://www.new-magazine.co.uk/latest...ne-this-week-/

Whatever...
jujubee is offline   Reply With Quote
 
Reply



Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

 
Forum Jump


All times are GMT +1. The time now is 11:56.