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Emma Chawner - the new Jade Goody? (Part 9)


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Old 01-05-2012, 21:48
lozenger
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I just googled Lucozade since I didn't know what it is. From wikipedia, this fascinating bit of information:

500ml (one bottle) of Lucozade Energy typically contains 21 teaspoons of sugar (85g), which is a child's full guideline daily amount of sugar and nearly all of that of a woman's, which has led to media criticism regarding public health. The sugar is now in the form of corn syrup (glucose/fructose) rather than pure glucose as was formerly the case (note this is the case even in Europe where almost all soft drinks contain naturally occurring sucrose rather than chemically manipulated corn syrup). This is somewhat bizarre since additional processing is required to convert the glucose syrup derived from corn to the less desirable glucose/fructose syrup.

Only in Chawnerland.

PS - a litre contains approx 700 calories. Just what the Chawns need.
Wow!! I never knew that! Lucozade here Mehitabel was traditionally given when you were recovering from an illness to build up strength (well it was when I was little... slight sign of a sniffle would result in a bottle of lucozade) but more recently they have marketed it more as a sports drink - my son has had the odd one when he has a football match for example - I wouldn't recommend it for sitting and watching Emmerdale... No wonder they have sparking stand up rows...
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Old 01-05-2012, 21:54
mrs.deschanel
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Looks as though it is just 5 episodes this week. Nothing showing for next week that I can see
It's not on Monday as they are showing Hoarders all day (bank holiday telly - wonderful) but is back Tuesday with the makeover results show . Dry your eyes missus - it's not over yet.
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Old 01-05-2012, 22:54
tally
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You learn something new every day. I never knew Lucozade was so calorific. I used to love it, and as I weighed a tad over 7 stone it didn't hurt I suppose, only my teeth.
But I cant abide any fizzy drinks, or squash for that matter, these days.

Just as well at 500 calories a pop!!
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Old 02-05-2012, 07:09
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This thread has been a non-stop education for me, not only have I learned about new illnesses - lorry diabetis, bad overs and helicopter pylons but I've also learnt how bad lucozade is for you - it's advertised as a sports drink I suppose and if you do a lot of sport, then those calories aren't going to hurt, but as Loz said, if you're just sat around watching telly - maybe a glass of water would be a better bet!

Thanks for the updates on the programmes, the only thing I remembered from the first series was one of the daughters being in hospital & Phil & Aud getting their hair done, then when they finally turned up, they commented to the doctor "Did you know my daughter was on X-Factor", the doctor just looked bemused at them.
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Old 02-05-2012, 07:31
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I'm loving the reviews of series one, it more than makes up for not being able to see it myself.

I'd forgotten how repulsive and controlling Phil was then, right from the start, he was an attention-seeking oaf, and has just got worse over the years.

I'm not surprised BIO have abandoned them, they spent thousands of pounds on them, all for nothing. But it was entertaining television. Shame the Chawners can't seem to understand that there is no more entertainment value in watching a fat family stay fat, though.
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Old 02-05-2012, 10:17
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In defense of the old blue badge thing - and please note this disclaimer - I am well aware there are dodgy people out there abusing it BUT - my husband often gets really nasty looks when he hops out the drivers side, because he is not the disabled one, I am. Fortunately they stop glaring when I stumble out the passenger side complete with stick. It's like "Am I disabled enough for you? Satisfied? Would you like me to cry aswell?"

Also, he is perfectly within his rights to drive my car on his own, using the blue badge, as long as he is coming to pick me up. So if you see someone leap abley out of a car, with a blue badge, please bear in mind it may not be them that is disabled.

Sorry for the rant but it gets exausting. You should never judge by appearance alone. (Easier said than done I know.)

Having said all that, unless Phil claims DLA in his own right and the car is in fact his, he shouldn't really be using at all without Aud in it. That is taking the pee pee.
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Old 02-05-2012, 12:03
tally
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It's OK squishy, we may appear judgemental, but it's only about the Flabs as they are lazy, idle entitled and downright anti social.

Most of us are intelligent to know that there are genuine reasons for able-bodied people to use a blue badge (I used to take my disabled Mother-In-Law out every week. The blue badge wasn't a problem, it was the fact she thought it meant she could open the passenger door immediately, no matter what oncoming traffic was. )
And mine, and several others pet peeve is that anyone fat eats too much and is a lazy good-for-nothing. No appreciation that there are other factors in obesity like medication.
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Old 02-05-2012, 12:19
mrs.deschanel
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He's allowed to use it for the benefit of the disabled person so going out for a trifle benefits Aud so is within the rules.

My son has a blue badge. He can walk but may refuse to. He might run off into traffic. He might have to be carried. He is often screaming and flailing his arms and kicking. The looks we get from people when using a disabled parking space are unbelievable. He also uses a disabled toilet due to the fact that he was born without vital parts of his urinary tract. He's been having surgery since he was 8 months old. On one occasion a fat old lady told us off for using a disabled loo. He can't go on his own and is getting too big to go in the ladies. Sometimes I think I should have a T shirt printed with his disabilities on the front and sod off in big letters on the back. What annoys me with disabled bays is lazy people using them or people leaving a disabled person in the car while they go off shopping. Also people who can walk round shops for hours but can't walk across a car park - come on down Chawners. Boils my wee.

Phil claiming to be a carer while Aud sits on her own and rots also makes me furious. I do everything for my son from cutting up his food to taking him to the loo, showering him, changing his bed at night, pacing the floor with him for hours when we should be asleep, being on call all day for the inevitable phone call from school because he's not coping and I need to either pick him up or go in and see him. I have no family support and as we're not disadvantaged absolutely no support so it's all my shoulders. Phil has no idea about caring - he doesn't even keep Aud clean or in a Tena lady. Wow I'm having a rant today.
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Old 02-05-2012, 12:34
greengran
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He's allowed to use it for the benefit of the disabled person so going out for a trifle benefits Aud so is within the rules.

My son has a blue badge. He can walk but may refuse to. He might run off into traffic. He might have to be carried. He is often screaming and flailing his arms and kicking. The looks we get from people when using a disabled parking space are unbelievable. He also uses a disabled toilet due to the fact that he was born without vital parts of his urinary tract. He's been having surgery since he was 8 months old. On one occasion a fat old lady told us off for using a disabled loo. He can't go on his own and is getting too big to go in the ladies. Sometimes I think I should have a T shirt printed with his disabilities on the front and sod off in big letters on the back. What annoys me with disabled bays is lazy people using them or people leaving a disabled person in the car while they go off shopping. Also people who can walk round shops for hours but can't walk across a car park - come on down Chawners. Boils my wee.

Phil claiming to be a carer while Aud sits on her own and rots also makes me furious. I do everything for my son from cutting up his food to taking him to the loo, showering him, changing his bed at night, pacing the floor with him for hours when we should be asleep, being on call all day for the inevitable phone call from school because he's not coping and I need to either pick him up or go in and see him. I have no family support and as we're not disadvantaged absolutely no support so it's all my shoulders. Phil has no idea about caring - he doesn't even keep Aud clean or in a Tena lady. Wow I'm having a rant today.
I know how you feel, we have had two disabled children in our family, one born with severe cerebral palsy, she was a quadriplegic and the other one with Perthes disease my daughter had a blue badge , but when people saw her getting out of the car with two small children they used to tut. Especially with the girl with Perthes because you couldn't see anything wrong with her, she just couln't walk more than a few steps. What really annoyed us though was people who parked in disabled bays when they weren't disabled.We used to put stickers on their cars.
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Old 02-05-2012, 12:47
mrs.deschanel
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I did my rant and now I feel terrible. I know I'm lucky that my son is healthy and I can cope with his disability (I may be sleep deprived, grumpy and miserable but I cope). There are many people in a much worse place than me so I shouldn't complain. There's just something about Phil's toothless moon face that makes me contemplate physical violence then I get all ranty.
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Old 02-05-2012, 15:41
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Episode three now. If there was any doubt that Audrey n Phizz are either
A) Self serving gremlins, or
B) mentally incompetent
....then doubt no more.

Now, I'm not Emma's biggest fan but the girl's in agony, in hospital, facing an emergency surgery. Do her parents rush to her bedside? As if! They had a prebooked hair appointment with their old Somerset buddy which they daren't miss. Even Dan tried to reason with them, in a very pathetic way though. He said "I would suggest maybe that Emma is the priority, and I don't know what you think about that. So let me get this straight...you'd like to see your old friend rather than see your daughter in hospital?"

Audrey replied, "Well she's booked me in for a half-past one!" then the pair of them bleat on about all the different things they're having done to their hair. Including clipping Phil's sticky up bits. They then spend THREE HOURS in the hairdressers, looking very pleased with themselves indeed. The hairdresser's as daft as them, "Oh Emma will see you looking smart tonight!". I don't think Emma cares!!

Eventually they get to the hospital. The surgeon explains the procedure then asks, "Do you have any questions?"

Audrey replies, "Did you know she was on X Factor?"

You couldn't make it up could you?!!

Then there's the issue of Wellsprings, who refuse to have Emma back until she gets the go-ahead from the doctor that she's able to exercise. Aud, on form again, saying "Well everyone here in the hospital likes you so why should it be ruined by one person in Wellsprings saying you can't go back!". I don't think they can grasp that not everything is a popularity contest.

Oh-Oooooooooh, they're going to a restaurant. Oh, no hang on, they've ALL ordered a healthy fish salad. Wait a minute, I thought it couldn't last. Phil, the evil pest, says "I've got some sausages in the fridge at home".....and Em, quick as a flash, "I'll have them, I'm dying for a sausage".

Well done, 4 weeks in a tres expensive health spa and Emma's moaned, griped, made excuses, got appendicitis, moaned and griped some more...still managed to lose 1.5 stones...and now she's straight back home so daddy can fatten her up again.

Guess what Phil said..."Its not quite 2 stones though, is it? Your appendix was one of the pounds off"

Horrible nasty man
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Old 02-05-2012, 16:03
lotty27
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Oooh Loopzilla you've whetted my appetite now - can't wait to watch it.

THIS is the episode which stayed with me most out of any of them. How could you not go and see your child in hospital and faff on getting your hair done instead? Appendicitis can kill FGS! Yet just in yesterday's episode they were saying how much they missed the girls and how empty the house was without them now that all their favourite programmes were finishing and there was nothing on TV!

Besides - I don't think we saw any sign of that old Somerset friend at the vow renewal did we? Perhaps she was one of the ones that Phil was on about not being able to make it because it was a Friday (perhaps that was Peter Andre's and Eamonn Holmes excuses too? ) Or perhaps she just wanted nowt to do with it!
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Old 02-05-2012, 16:45
lotty27
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Watching now


Is that a bruise on Emma's cheek in the first few minutes? Where it says her and Sam have been arguing at Wellsprings? It looks almost the same colour as her eyeshadow so I was wondering if she'd got the mother of all smudges or is it an actual bruise doled out by Sam?

(or is it just my TV going weird? )
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Old 02-05-2012, 16:51
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what channel is it being repeated on? anybody?
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Old 02-05-2012, 16:55
lotty27
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Unfortunately it's only on Bio HD at 3pm in the afternoons, it doesn't seem to be on the normal Bio channel



I'm sure Aldo Zilli wants to take one of his pans and whack Phil round the head with it! You can see him getting more and more exasperated!
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Old 02-05-2012, 16:57
tally
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Keep the updates coming guys. I'm so wishing I could watch it.

Mrs d, you do an outstanding job and it must be so difficult, particuarly when some ignoramuses choose to make judgemental gestures their brain cell cant comprehend. Hang on in there!

I know what you and greengran mean about wearing signs. Nobody understood severe depression and the ME symptoms that blighted life before I was diagnosed with Cushings. I broke my ankle, no pain ,just a very visible plaster cast and *bingo* people falling over to help and be considerate . Just think how much above some people's level we are in compassion. (: (None for the first flab family of the land, however)
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Old 02-05-2012, 16:58
Madonna38
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Unfortunately it's only on Bio HD at 3pm in the afternoons, it doesn't seem to be on the normal Bio channel



I'm sure Aldo Zilli wants to take one of his pans and whack Phil round the head with it! You can see him getting more and more exasperated!
what channel is bio HD? I have the XL package of Virgin media so I should have it.. right? (I sound like a right chawner with my TV channels)
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Old 02-05-2012, 17:01
tally
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what channel is bio HD? I have the XL package of Virgin media so I should have it.. right? (I sound like a right chawner with my TV channels)
Only if you can recite them all from memory. Aud could get a PhD in TV schedules.

I have no idea about Virgin, we cant get it where I live. But I'm not getting HD from Sky, I'd rather have multi room.
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Old 02-05-2012, 17:07
Madonna38
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Only if you can recite them all from memory. Aud could get a PhD in TV schedules.

I have no idea about Virgin, we cant get it where I live. But I'm not getting HD from Sky, I'd rather have multi room.
I'm not quite at that stage yet. Although I could stay in all summer and eat vegetarian sausages while memorising what is on which channel and all times. I could even make some charts. (although that takes effort, how very un chawner like)

I loved the first series! I remember watching the re runs on bio while doing college work. I have never laughed so much at a TV porgramme.
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Old 02-05-2012, 17:30
greengran
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I've just watched episode 1 and 2 again and was riveted by Phils nasal hair. I'd not really noticed how long it was in the first series. I was struck by their eagerness to lose weight at the beginning, I wonder if it was genuine or just lip service.
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Old 02-05-2012, 17:33
lotty27
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Were they already in Somerset when they got the phone call saying that Emma was ill? I'm sorry my geography isn't that brilliant but does it really take 3 hours to travel from somewhere in Somerset to Yeovil? I'm very confused! Either way though they decided to still get their hair done rather than rush to their daughter's bedside! Unbelievable.

I'm still laughing at them with the Specialist:

Aud: "Did you know she was in X Factor?"
Specialist: "X Factor? What is X Factor?"
Aud (huffily): "oh well everybody else knows"
Phil: "You got recognised didn't you? The nurse?
Specialist: "I'm sorry I don't follow too much television"

(gotta laugh or you'll cry that such people exist!)

No because he's too busy saving lives to be glued to his TV! What he was saying about Emma's treatment went way over their heads - don't think one word of it computed with Audrey which is why I think she started hapring on about the X Factor - something she knows and is comfortable with!

I've said it once and I'll say it again: No wonder those lovely folks in NZ thought it was a Ricky Gervaise style wind up programme!
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Old 02-05-2012, 17:42
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Oh god I am late home from work (sorry Chawners for swearing) Haven't had chance to watch it yet

Notice from Phil's FB page that someone has told him that Bio are showing the series - Phil comments that Bio are just making money out of them and thanks the person for telling them.

And the Chawners made no money out of the 3 series? With all the freebies, teeth, clothes, epensive weight loss camps etc etc.

Now must have dinner and watch the prog!!
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Old 02-05-2012, 17:49
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Oh god I am late home from work (sorry Chawners for swearing) Haven't had chance to watch it yet

Notice from Phil's FB page that someone has told him that Bio are showing the series - Phil comments that Bio are just making money out of them and thanks the person for telling them.

And the Chawners made no money out of the 3 series? With all the freebies, teeth, clothes, epensive weight loss camps etc etc.

Now must have dinner and watch the prog!!
I can't watch it while eating.

They make me feel bilious at the best of times.
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Old 02-05-2012, 18:10
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Notice from Phil's FB page that someone has told him that Bio are showing the series - Phil comments that Bio are just making money out of them and thanks the person for telling them.

And the Chawners made no money out of the 3 series? With all the freebies, teeth, clothes, epensive weight loss camps etc etc.
Was just coming to post this

Exactly what I thought - it's as though they expect royalties like proper famous people

It is rather boring with no updates from Phil.
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Old 02-05-2012, 18:40
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Were they already in Somerset when they got the phone call saying that Emma was ill? I'm sorry my geography isn't that brilliant but does it really take 3 hours to travel from somewhere in Somerset to Yeovil? I'm very confused! Either way though they decided to still get their hair done rather than rush to their daughter's bedside! Unbelievable.
Yes they were already in Somerset to join the girls at fat camp for a few days when Emma took ill. But as they're originally from Somerset they wanted to catch up with their old hairdresser mate.

So the reference to the three hour delay was because they kept their his n hers hair appointment rather than rushing to Emma's bedside.

Heinous parents. That's tantamount to mental cruelty.
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