[Shannon_Burnett]

One of the Chawner admirers has posted this on Phil's Facebook:

hi phil, with all your friends on Facebook we should band together to lend a helping hand with a CHAWNER LEGAL DEFENCE FUND so you can fight the lies and injustice you are victims of. if each one of us donated just a quid you would have 5000 to hire a solicitor. you can start up a paypal account for yourself (it's free) and provide the account name here so we can all pitch in to help. what are friends for after all? Come on, everyone, let's enable the Chawners to FIGHT BACK.

I wonder how much they will raise?

[lotty27]

Originally Posted by Shannon_Burnett

One of the Chawner admirers has posted this on Phil's Facebook:

hi phil, with all your friends on Facebook we should band together to lend a helping hand with a CHAWNER LEGAL DEFENCE FUND so you can fight the lies and injustice you are victims of. if each one of us donated just a quid you would have 5000 to hire a solicitor. you can start up a paypal account for yourself (it's free) and provide the account name here so we can all pitch in to help. what are friends for after all? Come on, everyone, let's enable the Chawners to FIGHT BACK.

I wonder how much they will raise?

LOL!!!

It had to happen, just had happen - the deluded fool! 'Chawner Legal Defence Fund' We're talking about a few paltry fines that they'll be able to pay off at a fiver a week and a 'straining order' not Stefan Kiszko or the Birmingham Six!

[Mehitabel]

Originally Posted by Shannon_Burnett

One of the Chawner admirers has posted this on Phil's Facebook:

hi phil, with all your friends on Facebook we should band together to lend a helping hand with a CHAWNER LEGAL DEFENCE FUND so you can fight the lies and injustice you are victims of. if each one of us donated just a quid you would have 5000 to hire a solicitor. you can start up a paypal account for yourself (it's free) and provide the account name here so we can all pitch in to help. what are friends for after all? Come on, everyone, let's enable the Chawners to FIGHT BACK.

I wonder how much they will raise?

Off to the store for popcorn. Please keep us posted.

[LilAud]

Originally Posted by Mehitabel

Off to the store for popcorn. Please keep us posted.

And with all of us on here - he could raise thousands

[Mehitabel]

Originally Posted by LilAud

And with all of us on here - he could raise thousands

None of it will come from me. Phlop wouldn't add me to his list of friends. How insulting is that??!!!

[MrIncredible]

I'll give them a quid. Just me and nutter Muriel.

[Madonna38]

Originally Posted by tenorlady

They're getting lots of hits on youtube though, which was probably the whole point of the Phil song. I feel quite inspired to write a song for Phil now

To the tune of Just Like A Pill, by Pink

"I'm lyin' here on the floor where you left me
I think I ate too much
I'm crying here, what have you done?
I thought it would be fun

I can't stay at Chawner Towers,
There's a shortage in the switch
I can't eat your sausages,
'Cause they're making me itch
I said I tried to call Emma again,
But shes being a little bitch
I think I'll get outta here, where I can

Run just as fast as I can
To the skip that's outside
To the Asda carpark
And I swear you're horrible, Phil
Instead of makin' me better,
You keep makin' me ill"

Tenorlady this is genius. I sang a long.
I keep forgetting the Chawners are back on so keep missing it. Oh well.

[LilAud]

Originally Posted by Mehitabel

None of it will come from me. Phlop wouldn't add me to his list of friends. How insulting is that??!!!

Think yourself lucky - he seems to like me I will put a quid in for you if you want

[Shannon_Burnett]

Phil has responded to the Defence Fund idea--he's not sure it will work but is willing to accept donations

Philip Chawner

Good ideal Norman but it will not work she is a x magistrate and seems to get her own way we know this is all wrong we would like her to take a lie detector because this is wrong we have had stones at the windows and also eggs last year and she seen them do it and she tells the police she seen nothing and she is on neighbourhood watch we would love to prove she is lying so if you think it will work then yes so thank you take care love chawners

[Mehitabel]

Originally Posted by LilAud

Think yourself lucky - he seems to like me I will put a quid in for you if you want

I don't want. But thanks for the offer.

[Simi89]

He's changed his sign off from Love Phil and family or whatever it was to Love Chawners.

[tenorlady]

Originally Posted by Simi89

He's changed his sign off from Love Phil and family or whatever it was to Love Chawners.

That's because, like the Osbournes, the Windsors, and the Kardashians, they are true celebrities, and everyone and anyone knows who they are, no need for first names, and no need for the usual explanation.

For example:
Me at work to colleagues - I wonder what Emma Chawner would be like now if she'd gone to college, got some qualifications and worked fulltime?
Colleague - Who's that? That young lass who cleans the toilets?
Me: No, Emma Chawner, she was on the X Factor 3 times, she's in a reality TV show with her family about being fat and unemployed
Colleague: WHO? Never heard of her
Me: <google images> Look, her!
Colleague: Nah, no idea who she is. Oh wait! The one who slapped her friend in front of the judges and then appeared topless in the Daily Star the next week?
Me: No, that was Abbey Johnstone in 2010. This is Emma Chawner from 2007, 2008 and 2009.
Colleague: .....stunned silence.... then changes the subject to Bob Diamond and the interest rate-fixing scandal.

(At this point, pitying looks are directed my way and I become the subject of office gossip)

[orangesmartie]

Originally Posted by Shannon_Burnett

One of the Chawner admirers has posted this on Phil's Facebook:

hi phil, with all your friends on Facebook we should band together to lend a helping hand with a CHAWNER LEGAL DEFENCE FUND so you can fight the lies and injustice you are victims of. if each one of us donated just a quid you would have 5000 to hire a solicitor. you can start up a paypal account for yourself (it's free) and provide the account name here so we can all pitch in to help. what are friends for after all? Come on, everyone, let's enable the Chawners to FIGHT BACK.

I wonder how much they will raise?

This sounds suspiciously like a CoC'er

[Alberon]

Originally Posted by Simi89

He's changed his sign off from Love Phil and family or whatever it was to Love Chawners.

Maybe it's more of a command than a sign-off?

Phil's posted a fair bit again on Facebook. This in a response to 'Twice Green' who now have a Facebook page and are now one of Phil's imaginary friends.

Hi thank you so much we all love the video and thank you so much to go out your way to make it you are so sweet both of you like i have said we all love you guys in New Zealand and you done a good job any more on the way has that was cool and we hope to see more video’s and maybe we love to come over and meet you some day so you have a good weekend and be safe with the earthquakes you are getting so love to you both and thanks and love to your family and you take care you are great love Phil and family xxxx

Phil gives his usual two posts one to the UK and one to NZ wishing them a good weekend. He adds this to the NZ one.

THIS IS TO EVERYONE IN NEW ZEALAND AND THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR SUPPORT

Hi to our friends in New Zealand we are all sorry it was our last show but we all want to still keep in touch with everyone has you all have been so supportive and all your kind messages you have sent us we love to come over and see you all someday it may not be this year but maybe next your we have been told you are still getting earthquake’s and we all hope you will all be safe and the earthquake’s stops and you do not get any more we know we cannot stop them happening so we send our love to you all and you all have a good weekend and take care and we will keep you posted about if we are coming over love Phil and family xxxx

Even if someone was barking mad enough to pay for the airfare over to NZ probably Phil and definitely Audrey are not well enough for any airline to let them on board.

Also it's nice to see Phil trying to use apostrophes. It's just a shame every single one is in the wrong place, but at least he's trying.

Then there's a selection of random photos. Two of Phil Vickery the chef, one of Curly from Coronation Street (I think, I don't watch soaps). A shot of Tower Bridge and no less than three of Phil's granddaughter (some in the above photos). He should know better than to put photos of Alicia up on an effectively public forum. What am I saying?!? Of course he doesn't know better.

Finally, maybe he isn't going to go for the Paypal defence fund.

This all seems doggy

Yes, Phil. Indeed it does.

[tenorlady]

Alberon, I am sitting here in tears of laughter at your post. Thank you for brightening up a miserable day. What was the 'doggy' comment in response to?

And has anyone donated to the Chawner Defence Fund?

[Mehitabel]

LOL Phil seems to have trouble with the "dj" sound as in JUDGE = "Jug". I'm assuming that by "doggy" he means DODGY. Like T-lady, tears of laughter running down my face as I type this. Doggy pretty well sums of everything about the Chawns.

[lozenger]

Hilarious..!!

Pity he's viewing the Defence Fund with suspicion, I am sure it would be a great help next time they find themselves up against a x magistrate and a doggy jug.

[lotty27]

Originally Posted by orangesmartie

This sounds suspiciously like a CoC'er

Oooh I never thought of that Come on, own up, who did it?



Doggy? LOL! I hope he's not referring that to that infamous 'car/petrol on skirt/skirt off' incident!

And why does he always give best wishes for the weekend? A weekend is like any other day to HIM after all!

If the last episode of CoC has been aired in NZ I wonder if their 'fans' (and Phil's 'friends') will desert them now realising that they've actually achieved nothing in the last 3 years even with all the expensive help?

[tenorlady]

Originally Posted by lozenger

Hilarious..!!

Pity he's viewing the Defence Fund with suspicion, I am sure it would be a great help next time they find themselves up against a x magistrate and a doggy jug.

http://mysticalgifts2buy.co.uk/image...cts3/DOG31.jpg

Like this?

[Shannon_Burnett]

I wonder if the Chawners should take up Scientology?

Aren't the believers all skinny?

[t1t3h]

Originally Posted by Shannon_Burnett

I wonder if the Chawners should take up Scientology?

Aren't the believers all skinny?

Well one thing Phil and Scientology have in common is that if you leave them you are shunned and members are encouraged never to talk about them again...

[kiviraat]

Originally Posted by t1t3h

Well one thing Phil and Scientology have in common is that if you leave them you are shunned and members are encouraged never to talk about them again...

Don't go giving him ideas!!! Although I'm sure that setting up his own version of Scientology (Chawnerology?) would surely muck up their money...

[Simi89]

They'd have to give up all their benefit money to the scientologists to gain further 'understanding' mind you they seem to struggle with basic common sense so its doubtful they'd be able to understand the twaddle from a 'religion' dreamt up by a sci-fi writer.

[tenorlady]

Chawnerology, with it's 5 a day the Audrey way, cheese has no fat and pears taste funny ethic, makes a lot more sense than scientology.

I've always thought L. Ron Hubbard intended Dianetics to be a work of fiction, a bit like H G Wells and War Of The Worlds, but when dim people thought it was real, he cashed in. I bet he made a bloody fortune out of the gullible.

[greengran]

Phil is now talking about emigrating to New Zealand. We have got a F.L.A.B fund ( Flee Lard Arses Begone) ,but there's not much in it. I think we need to open it up again and start collecting, to help them on their way.it will be expensive as they will need two seats each on the plane, but it's a price worth paying.