Moving In With Your OH

Pistol WhipPistol Whip Posts: 9,677
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Hello people :)

If you live with your OH, how long did you "date" before you moved in with them? Was it a matter of weeks, months or even years?

I only ask because I'm thinking of taking this step... we've been seeing each other since November and spend ALOT of time in each others places, them staying at mine or me staying there.

Thanks for any replies :)
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Comments

  • AppleseedAppleseed Posts: 3,827
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    Always do the moving in yourself, don't let them move in with you.
    Then rent out your own gaff and get the mortgage (if you have one) paid!

    When you say November, do you mean the one that we had 2 weeks ago??
  • whackyracerwhackyracer Posts: 15,786
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    Just over a year for me, so we knew each otter pretty well, though it's still a totally different experience living with someone as opposed to just dating.
  • Pistol WhipPistol Whip Posts: 9,677
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    Appleseed wrote: »
    Always do the moving in yourself, don't let them move in with you.
    Then rent out your own gaff and get the mortgage (if you have one) paid!

    When you say November, do you mean the one that we had 2 weeks ago??

    I rent, so does he.

    It was the beginning of November :o Pretty quick, I know! Although we met in September.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 773
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    I've been seeing my OH since March and we've decided to move in together next March. My thinking is be with them for a year so you can get to see what they are like in each season! It probably doesn't make much sense but I think a year is right for us, although of course it is different depending on the couple!
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 17
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    I am moving in with my boyfriend as soon as I can sort things out at home, we've been together since July and have known each other for nearly 3 years so it's not too short time really. Whatever feels right is best for you :)
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 410
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    We met in March, started dating in August, moved in December the same year.

    We've been happily living together for 3yrs now, getting married in August.

    A lot of people thought we were moving in too quickly, but everybody's different.
  • LilianaNFCLilianaNFC Posts: 68
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    My OH practically lives with me, not sure why my place is favoured we just end up here!

    We have alot of history, was in a relationship for a while then split, now back together, im sure its the real deal this time but wont make any decisions on officially getting our own place yet!

    I think with regards to moving in together, when its time, it will happen :)

    Although OH has had christmas do tonight and after too much drink has a tendancy to
    snore and take most of my bed up! so im awake posting on here, this part is the downside
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 1,076
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    Not wishing to put a dampener on things, but I would never move in with someone after a couple of months regardless of if I wanted to or not. I'd feel that I simply hadn't had sufficient time to make an educated decision whether I could stand to live with her. There may also be annoying habits that may not yet have been revealed, which could well drive you mad when you're in her company 24/7. That said, she may be the one.

    In my case I met my now wife at university in 2001, and didn't live together until I returned to the UK, and she decided to join me in 2003. We got married in 2007.

    Take your time... mistakes can be expensive, but by the sound of it, you've pretty much made your mind up though.
  • ChristaChrista Posts: 17,560
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    We've been together almost 4 years. Spent a lot of time at each others' places, but we finally bought the flat I'd been renting with friends this summer & moved in together. Getting married next summer.

    No way would I move in with someone I'd only been with a month...
  • NatgarNatgar Posts: 2,925
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    Hello people :)

    If you live with your OH, how long did you "date" before you moved in with them? Was it a matter of weeks, months or even years?

    I only ask because I'm thinking of taking this step... we've been seeing each other since November and spend ALOT of time in each others places, them staying at mine or me staying there.

    Thanks for any replies :)

    We moved in 3 months after meeting and that was 17 years ago. We have been happily married 15 years. If the person is the 'one' it makes no difference how long before you move in together. It does take compromise and tolerance to get used to living with someone though.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 3,224
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    Nothing wrong with moving in with someone early...me and my now hubby moved in together after just about 3 months of being a couple and 11 yrs on we're still together.

    Worked for us! :)
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 666
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    My fiance and I got our first place together the day before our first anniversary (July this year).

    We're in our second place now - LONG story.
  • chiller15chiller15 Posts: 4,194
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    I currently live with my girlfriend, though it's her mums house. It took about 2-3 years before I moved in. It was kind of a natural transition. I spent most of my time with her whether it was at her house, or my parents. I just spend more and more time at hers, that I effectively moved in.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 1,229
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    18 months before we moved in; my parents were moving and it was a case of move in with the OH or continue sharing a room with my sister, i picked the right answer moving in with the OH:p
  • CineastCineast Posts: 2,483
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    I don't think there's a hard and fast rule for how long, it all depends on the relationship. I've been with my husband for ten years and we moved in together after 2 years. That was right for us - I was 22 when we first met, still pretty young, and I doubt we'd still be together if we'd started living together after a month as I probably wouldn't have wanted to make the concessions I had to when we did move in.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 240
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    One year. We had known each other four years, been dating one year and lived over 200 miles apart. He then moved here to London to be with me and take up a job.

    I would have been very reluctant to move in together any earlier than that just because I'm familiar with the exciting butterflies and infatuation of a relationship in its early months wearing off a little further down the line. However, everyone's different and what works for me won't work for everyone else and vice versa.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 1,324
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    We met in the September and he had moved in by January (although we had known each other 15 years previously) into my place. He moved in so soon because he was down south and I was up north, perhaps if we'd lived closer we may have taken it slower. However, agree with the poster who said if they're the one then time shouldn't make any difference.

    We bought a place together 4 years ago and we're still together 7 years after meeting, I'd say though that the first few years were not as good as they are now (early years were about making adjustments).
  • thats_racistthats_racist Posts: 1,422
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    My partner and I were 18 when we met and both lived at home at the time.

    We were together for 2 months when we got our first house together. People said we were rushing into it but that was nine years go and we're as happy as ever.:D
  • _radioamerica_radioamerica Posts: 4,921
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    This is going to sound crazy but it was only 3 weeks.

    I hated living at home and he was living with a housemate he couldn't stand. A house by his landlord became available over the road from his old house and we decided to move in. Its been almost 4 years now and we've been married for one.

    I know one girl who met her OH one day, asked him round for a drink that evening and he has still not gone home 8 years later.

    Obviously different things work for different people. You have to do what is right for you. I'm not going to say it was easy. He settled into it very easy whereas I was quite firey back then and found it hard to ajust.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 1,324
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    _radioamerica - that reminded me about some very good friends who did the same thing, she went round to his one night and basically never left. They are now are married with 2 kids.

    I too found it hard to adjust as I was a pain in the bottom having been spoilt by my Mum.
  • 2shy20072shy2007 Posts: 52,577
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    We chatted online for 9 months before realising we had a thing for each other, then we met, once.He went back home then moved in 2 weeks later.

    We have been together for 9 years and married for 7 :) it was a crazy thing to do at the time, but for us, after meeting just once, it worked.

    We felt we knew each other inside out anyway after talking for so long online and on the phone.
  • WokStationWokStation Posts: 23,112
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    Hello people :)

    If you live with your OH, how long did you "date" before you moved in with them? Was it a matter of weeks, months or even years?

    Two days. Well, a little over 24hrs to be precise.

    She stayed the night and never went home.
  • elliecatelliecat Posts: 9,890
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    My other half moved in with me after 5 months, I had just started Uni and was living in halls, if his Mum hadn't kicked him out I don't think he would have done as it wasn't ideal but he had no where else to go. When I left halls at the end of my first year and moved back to my parents he moved back with me and we lived there for 6 years until we bought our own place last year. I have to say my parents were amazingly understanding and patient to have someone live with them for so long.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 637
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    I got together with my boyfriend in mid July 2008, we decided in early August to live together but we had to wait until the following June 2009 because I had a contract where I was living at the time until then, he was still at his Mum's. We signed for our flat in March and spent months being *really* excited about it. In the time we got together til we moved in together I think we spent maybe 1 night every 2/3 weeks apart and I just basically moved in with his mum.

    It was the easiest decision we made to move in together, we've lived together now for a year and a half very happily and next year we're moving to a new place with more space so that we can settle down a bit more.
  • Monkey_NewsMonkey_News Posts: 110
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    Novemeber!?

    Less than a month and you want to move in together?

    No, no, no, no.

    Just no. Terrible idea.
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