Peter Andre (part 3)

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  • Sweet_PrincessSweet_Princess Posts: 11,038
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    OMG a new thread so does this mean Peter isnt suffering anymore?
  • smilliekyliesmilliekylie Posts: 3,661
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    Oh dear, I wonder if this is the audience Peter 'I'm a credible artist me' Andre, is looking for.

    KInda don't think so, but this is what he's got. Perhaps the next incarnation of his so called music career is heading into Daniel O'Donnell territory

    Ditch the Rat Pack look and bring on the Jumpers I say.
  • DiamondDollDiamondDoll Posts: 21,460
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    Oh dear, I wonder if this is the audience Peter 'I'm a credible artist me' Andre, is looking for.

    KInda don't think so, but this is what he's got. Perhaps the next incarnation of his so called music career is heading into Daniel O'Donnell territory

    Ditch the Rat Pack look and bring on the Jumpers I say.

    Good post. :D

    Btw..........have you realized that your username will be on page one for quite a while? :D
  • GoatyGoaty Posts: 7,776
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    PA still remind me of childish singer Eoin "I've no willy" McLove on Father Ted.
  • smilliekyliesmilliekylie Posts: 3,661
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    Good post. :D

    Btw..........have you realized that your username will be on page one for quite a while? :D

    Yes I noticed that I have my username under the thread title 'Peter Andre' now, oh the shame :D

    It's like winning a really crap lottery prize, such as tickets to a TM GiG.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 1,881
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    Goaty wrote: »
    PA still remind me of childish singer Eoin "I've no willy" McLove on Father Ted.

    Thats exactly who I was thinking of too :D that character just had to be based on PA
  • BelaBela Posts: 2,568
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    Derby visit didn't do much for 'Big Nit' sales today on Itunes Daily Chart

    Dropped out the Top 100, was at 99, now at 158.

    So far on Itunes it's only peaked at 92. Doesn't look like the fans like digital copies, I guess it's all about getting yourself a nice shiny signed copy, with a hint of fake tan on the surface :blush:

    :D Really, he could be selling anything. Big Nit is incidental. His fans would still be turning up and coughing up for the chance of an up close and personal with him. Big Nit is not music, it's just another CAN product, no different in quality terms than his calendars, perfumes, coffees, etc.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 1,881
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    Shiny thread!
    This is REALLY old, but sounds very familiar. This man needs a new script!

    THE MIRROR MAN; Peter Andre - He's so vain he probably thinks this story's about him.
    Link/Page Citation
    He Loves The Mirror, I've been told. So I'm looking forward to meeting another loyal reader. And, sure enough, that's just what Peter Andre is engrossed in as I peep around the door of his hotel bedroom... only it's the mirror on his dressing table.

    The singer with the most famous six-pack in the world made his name by getting his kit off and showing off his perfectly-honed chest. Now, as he runs his fingers through his gelled raven locks, he's inspecting its olive perma-tan. He spots me and tears himself away to give me a great, wet kiss on the cheek.

    I back away and wipe off the brown goo he's just rubbed on my face. "I don't usually wear this much make-up," he protests. "It's only because I've just done a TV interview. It's horrible I don't know how you women put up with it."

    Yeah, right.

    I resist pointing out that none of my friends wears half the make-up he does. "Er, got any remover?" he asks. The rows of exotic bottles on his bathroom shelf include body oil, skin creams, designer Armani aftershave and hair products galore. No remover. Pop Adonis Peter is in Athens for part of his frantic European promotional tour, and he's invited me to join him for the day.

    He's wearing a black suit and smart black shirt unbuttoned to the waist to reveal that chest. Its mahogany sheen is set off by a weighty gold necklace. I've been with him since this morning, when a make-up lady arrived to cake on the goo and mould his hair into shape.

    It's been a manic day. Already he has given interviews to a radio station and six magazines, including Popcorn, the Greek equivalent of Smash Hits. Popcorn needed pictures, so the make-up lady got to work. He emerged several shades darker, strutted to a corner and started striking his well-rehearsed resume of poses.

    Peter shrugged his jacket off one shoulder, then the other, then both, all the while giving the camera his best mean-and-moody pout. Then came his interview on the TV show Ano Kato (meaning Upside Down), the Greek version of Top Of The Pops. Incredibly, more make-up was trowelled on. He took it in his stride, then leaned back, adjusted his sunglasses and grinned at the camera. He'd been wearing the shades all day, but whipped them into his pocket fast when the TV presenter told him in pidgin English: "For to be more lovable, you need to take them off." Peter speaks a little of the local lingo, thanks to his Greek parents.

    Before the cameras started rolling, he whispered to the presenter: "How do you say: 'My love to all my fans' in Greek?" Then he practised the phrase five times, finishing off with a big cheesy grin into the camera. He ushers me into his suite where he's going to relax before his concert for 2,000 Greek teenagers. He hurriedly picks up yesterday's underpants from the floor - Calvin Klein, naturally - and winks. "You're going to have to excuse this mess, but I am a fella." Thanks for reminding me, Peter.

    Suddenly, in front of a floor to ceiling mirror he launches himself into a series of bizarre, Bruce Lee-style kicks. No time for his daily, body- beautiful gym session, he explains. I should be fainting with excitement. Millions of teenage girls the world over would give their Spice Girl CD collections to be standing where I am - in Peter Andre's bedroom as he flexes his pecs. Instead, I am trying not to laugh.

    I have to try even harder when he tells me: "I've decided to put my image second and my music first. "I think people will get sick of looking at my body," he goes on, pausing to tease his slicked-back hair into place. "My fans are growing up and I can't stay the same forever. "I want to do a movie." He breaks into a New York drawl.

    "I reckon I do an all right De Niro. 'You talking to me? See that guy over there - he's not a good guy, I'm telling ya'." He roars with laughter. "I'd love to star next to Pacino and De Niro. But one thing's for sure, I'm not taking my shirt off to sell records again. I might as well be a Chippendale."

    We're interrupted by two huge, mean-looking men I presume to be minders. They have just surfaced from bed, nursing hangovers. Peter introduces me to his big brothers. Chris, 34, a bouzouki player, once worked as Peter's manager. Danny, 30, is head of his security. "I always knew he had it," says Chris proudly, puffing out his chest, which is larger but not as perfectly formed as Peter's. "We used to sit in the bedroom after school and I'd make him practise singing high notes."

    Peter Andrea was born in Harrow, London. His family moved to Australia's Gold Coast, when he was ten. As a teenager, he won a talent show, was offered a recording contract and went on to support Bobby Brown and Madonna on their Australian tours. Three years ago, Peter moved back to London, and a series of hits - Mysterious Girl, Only One, I Feel You, All About Us and a No 1, Flava.

    Now, at 24, he has just banked his first million.

    So why hasn't Peter had a girlfriend for eight months, I ask, trying to imagine the morning battle for the bathroom mirror. "I like being single," he replies, defensively. "I can concentrate on my work and not feel guilty." The last lady in his life was dancer Sharleen Moore, 19. They split up in February. Now he believes women are scared off by his superstar status. "They feel too intimidated to come up to me."

    His mobile rings and he grabs it excitedly. But it's just his mum calling from Australia. "Have you found yourself a nice Greek girl yet?" she says. Peter cringes. "She's been asking that for years. My parents are from Cyprus and there's nothing mum would like more. But I tell her she'll have to wait until I fall in love.

    "I haven't seen my mum for 18 months but when I'm here I speak to her every day."

    Maybe he's not so bad after all, I think, as he gives me a goodbye peck on the cheek.

    Peter Andre's new single Lonely, on Mushroom Records, is on sale now.
    COPYRIGHT 1997 MGN LTD
    No portion of this article can be reproduced without the express written permission from the copyright holder.
    Copyright 1997 Gale, Cengage Learning. All rights reserved.

    Its quite sad that almost twenty years on and he still cares more about the man in the mirror than he does about anyone around him, what a hollow being he is :(
  • DiamondDollDiamondDoll Posts: 21,460
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    Yes I noticed that I have my username under the thread title 'Peter Andre' now, oh the shame :D

    It's like winning a really crap lottery prize, such as tickets to a TM GiG.

    Lol :D:D
  • artlesschaosartlesschaos Posts: 11,345
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    Oh dear, I wonder if this is the audience Peter 'I'm a credible artist me' Andre, is looking for.

    KInda don't think so, but this is what he's got. Perhaps the next incarnation of his so called music career is heading into Daniel O'Donnell territory

    Ditch the Rat Pack look and bring on the Jumpers I say.

    I know - people who can't tell the time!

    Also - "forced to" miss the signing because of the birth of their baby...or having their priorities right.
  • smilliekyliesmilliekylie Posts: 3,661
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    What is wrong with me, I keep looking up TM stuff on t'internet, and in the process poisoning my soul with the awfulness that is TM World.

    This article is like, WTF x infinity

    According to Now Magazine, it's 'hilarious'. They are wrong, it isn't.

    http://www.nowmagazine.co.uk/celebrity-news/553436/omg-peter-andre-sports-dodgy-bald-patch-and-gold-chain-in-muscly-bodysuit-for-tv-appearance
  • ButterfaceButterface Posts: 2,709
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    Suddenly, in front of a floor to ceiling mirror he launches himself into a series of bizarre, Bruce Lee-style kicks. No time for his daily, body- beautiful gym session, he explains. I should be fainting with excitement. Millions of teenage girls the world over would give their Spice Girl CD collections to be standing where I am - in Peter Andre's bedroom as he flexes his pecs. Instead, I am trying not to laugh.

    Oh my goodness. My toes curled up like jester's shoes, with embarrassment for him at that interview. 17 years on and he's STILL exactly the same. :o
  • The PrumeisterThe Prumeister Posts: 22,398
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    Butterface wrote: »
    Oh my goodness. My toes curled up like jester's shoes, with embarrassment for him at that interview. 17 years on and he's STILL exactly the same. :o



    Only difference now for the Unhandsome Peter, is that he is able to get ££££££ by loving his kids and telling us all ad nauseam.
  • Azura's StarAzura's Star Posts: 3,190
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    What is wrong with me, I keep looking up TM stuff on t'internet, and in the process poisoning my soul with the awfulness that is TM World.

    This article is like, WTF x infinity

    According to Now Magazine, it's 'hilarious'. They are wrong, it isn't.

    http://www.nowmagazine.co.uk/celebrity-news/553436/omg-peter-andre-sports-dodgy-bald-patch-and-gold-chain-in-muscly-bodysuit-for-tv-appearance


    Meh doesn't even come close.
    Who on earth would even be able to raise a smile at that, let alone find it hilarious?
    ( Rhetorical question ladies - I think we all know the answer ;-) ).

    I know there are still some who excuse Tangoman's half-witted attention-seeking, because he's not very bright but means well.
    Personally I think that's bullsh*t.
    Seeing as I was there anyway (you made me >:(), I had a look at some of the farticles underneath, and this one caught my eye.

    http://www.nowmagazine.co.uk/celebrity-news/553354/aw-peter-andre-sends-katie-price-s-son-harvey-birthday-tweet-after-sharing-picture-of-himself-in-blond-wig

    Now, as I understand it, Harvey has progressed way beyond the prognosis he was given at birth.
    But sadly, not far enough to be able to use Twitter.
    So why (?) would the Tangerine Twunt be sending a birthday message to his "ex-stepson" in such a way?
    It just epitomises why I think that PA is such a slimy, sleazy, little sh*tbag, and convinces me that the real reason he doesn't see Harvey is that he just can't be arsed if there's nothing in it for him.
  • DiamondDollDiamondDoll Posts: 21,460
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  • smilliekyliesmilliekylie Posts: 3,661
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    Oh no, now you've made me research his height. 5ft 7.75in (yes google is that precise)

    So he has probably got 'little man syndrome' to add to his suffering, will it ever end.
  • BelaBela Posts: 2,568
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  • Azura's StarAzura's Star Posts: 3,190
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    :D:D
    I have a feeling that those disrespectful mumsnetters are not treating the royal visit with quite the deference it deserves

    squoosh Fri 30-May-14 15:29:01
    I love that the snowy white tablecloth will further intensify his knicker loosening man tan.

    EasterSundaySimmons Fri 30-May-14 15:36:18
    Op, get him to autograph an orange, it will be worth loads!

    EasterSundaySimmons Fri 30-May-14 15:56:21
    As well as a bodyguard, Peter Andre has an extensive entourage.

    A qualified English teacher on hand to help out at the signings in case Peter struggles with the spelling of Andre.

    Fake tan specialist. Carries a 10 litre bottle of Ronseal quick drying wood stain in Teak, with spray nozzle.

    Fake tan assistant number one. Assists fake tan specialist by carrying around a spare 10 litre bottle of Ronseal quick drying wood stain in Teak.

    Fake tan assistant number two. Back up for fake tan assistant number one.

    Hair care assistant. Will step in and apply Mr Andre's hair oil of choice, WD40 at the snap of Mr Andre's fingers.

    Auto use card carrier. Carries a large sign that reads, 'I LOVE MY KIDS' in case Mr Andre forgets his lines.

    goodasitgets Fri 30-May-14 16:29:00
    Facebook friends comment
    "Why would anyone camp overnight to see him?"
    "I would for his execution"

    Nokidsnoproblem Fri 30-May-14 17:38:18
    He looks like the kind of bartender you would avoid in Benidorm.

    How can anyone find him attractive?
  • DiamondDollDiamondDoll Posts: 21,460
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    That thread is so funny. :D
  • momma11momma11 Posts: 3,843
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    Bela wrote: »
    :D Really, he could be selling anything. Big Nit is incidental. His fans would still be turning up and coughing up for the chance of an up close and personal with him. Big Nit is not music, it's just another CAN product, no different in quality terms than his calendars, perfumes, coffees, etc.

    In all seriousness I object to that sweeping stereotype.

    It's not incidental , and there are a few of us who haven't liked some of the things PA has done.
    I have never bought his perfume , I have never smelled his perfume , I would never buy perfume simply because it has been endorsed by a celebrity .
    I have my own favourites which are classics . i.e . yves st laurant , champagne ( alas no longer available ) estee lauder white linen , youth dew and Dioressence ( again no longer available )
    I like this album because it is good in my opinion , Insania was not .
    I don't always like everything he does but I do like this one.
    To dismiss his fans as irrelevant is wrong , you might not like his music , you might think he's cheesy and can't sing , others will disagree .

    I have never bought a calender or any bric a brac and I am certain I am not alone in that.
    Implying people like me are of no consequence because your opinion of PA is the right one is offensive .
    You have an opinion , so do I , yours is not more important than mine.
  • RyJaRyJa Posts: 900
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    Thought I'd bring this over, ready for Sunday...

    What number will TM's new album get to ......

    Betty Britain 82

    Blue Eyed lady 74

    Azura's Star 100

    Blondie X 55

    artlesschaos 72

    Cym 98

    cazzz 41

    Ella71110 69

    Hmmbop 2 (funniest thing I've heard in a long time)

    Bela 63

    DiamondDoll

    NotaTypo 73

    bunny55

    Goaty 1

    Daisy Bennyboots 44

    j0anne 75

    Kat_12 65

    The Prumeister 147

    scone

    Cyril_Sneer 54

    Anna.Nuttall 85

    livingdeadgirl 50

    Butterface 53

    Essex Angel* 92

    kiviraat 38

    changa

    Not fussy 96

    Gortonian 60

    Momma11 10

    Is this only for Britain though? Is there one for the U.S? :)
  • smilliekyliesmilliekylie Posts: 3,661
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    I think i'm rather in love with The MumsNetters, they have good taste, and witty with it :D

    Have to save, thought they were a big part of his fan base (Mums that is) So who does he appeal to, is it just the Daniel O'Donnell crowd now ???
  • Azura's StarAzura's Star Posts: 3,190
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    RyJa wrote: »
    Is this only for Britain though? Is there one for the U.S? :)


    Haven't we already upset the Americans by foisting Piers Morgan on them?
    Making them endure Tangoman's Big Nit would be tantamount to a declaration of war.
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