My kitten doesn't like men

Pandora 9Pandora 9 Posts: 2,350
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I had a new kitten before Christmas and for some reason he has taken a dislike to my husband and son. Every time they go to stroke him he bites them. He is perfectly fine with me but he can have some naughty times where he attacks my slippers. I have encouraged them to feed him sometimes because they never actually look after him. Last night my husband was eating some food and the kitten came over begging for a titbit my husband shouted at him and pushed him away. The little cat then arched his back and went for him. I did laugh but my husband was not amused and said that he wished we had never had the cat in the first place.

Any suggestions how to make the cat be more friendly towards the men in my family?

Comments

  • stud u likestud u like Posts: 42,100
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    Well what do you expect if the poor kitten is shouted at and pushed away. It sends out confusing messages.
  • Lost_SoulLost_Soul Posts: 548
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    Maybe next time the kitten comes to your husband for a titbit he could actually give him some instead of pushing him away, if they have no interaction with the cat its no wonder the cat is wary of them. They need to play with him and spend time with him.
  • ShrikeShrike Posts: 16,606
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    Its difficult when they beg and steal. Certainly if he shouts at the kitten it will fear him and keep away from him, but then again its a real pain having a cat nick your dinner!
    When my cat is being a real pain I shut her out of the room until I've finished but then give her some treats and make a fuss of her.
    You don't mention how old the son is? A young child could be heavy handed when stroking and upset the kitten. Even so some cats don't like to be stroked for too long - you have to be aware of when they've had enough.
  • Pandora 9Pandora 9 Posts: 2,350
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    Shrike wrote: »
    Its difficult when they beg and steal. Certainly if he shouts at the kitten it will fear him and keep away from him, but then again its a real pain having a cat nick your dinner!
    When my cat is being a real pain I shut her out of the room until I've finished but then give her some treats and make a fuss of her.
    You don't mention how old the son is? A young child could be heavy handed when stroking and upset the kitten. Even so some cats don't like to be stroked for too long - you have to be aware of when they've had enough.


    My son is 20 that's why I said my kitten doesn't like men. The kitten likes my daughter when she visits so I did wonder if it was because men have deeper voices.
  • Bex_123Bex_123 Posts: 10,783
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    Pandora 9 wrote: »
    I have encouraged them to feed him sometimes because they never actually look after him. Last night my husband was eating some food and the kitten came over begging for a titbit my husband shouted at him and pushed him away. The little cat then arched his back and went for him. I did laugh but my husband was not amused and said that he wished we had never had the cat in the first place.

    Any suggestions how to make the cat be more friendly towards the men in my family?

    Cats are very astute creatures. They can usually sense a dislike for them way before anyone actually acts on it. If your husband shouts at the kitten and pushes him away, then there's your answer I'm afraid. Your kitten was not born with the hatred of males.

    As with all animals, it's often very simply a case of they will love who feeds them/plays with them most. Certainly this has always been the case with cats in my house growing up, they always seemed to like my Mum best but she was the one who was around all day when working from home so fed them all the time! You say they don't help look after the kitten and so he will naturally have a preference for the person who does.

    I think you should really be asking how to make the men more friendly to the kitten in your family, since it's not the kittens fault that people are getting annoyed with what it just does naturally.
  • BadcatBadcat Posts: 3,684
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    Your kitten is picking up on various things, one of them is your husband shouting at it.

    So it is liable to associate the sound of a deeper voice with being made to feel scared, a kitten who is frightened WILL arch it's back and hiss, you would if you could!

    Also sounds like your hubby actually doesn't really like having a kitten around... a kitten will pick up on that as well.

    Hubby needs to learn some very basic "how to get along with a new pet" lessons. Don't shout. let the kitten come to him (hold out his hand to be sniffed etc). speak in nice tones, let the kitten rub on him before he goes to stroke it.

    Not rocket science.
  • liamhereliamhere Posts: 2,054
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    lesbian cat......i'll get my coat :)
  • towerstowers Posts: 12,183
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    Our cat has always had a fear of workmen in the house, the minute they enter, he's shoots outside and stays there for several hours. We've no idea whether he once had a bad experience with groups of men or building work in general but we've had him since he was 4 or 5 months old, from Cats Protection. Whilst he tolerates my dad, he doesn't seek him out and he's another one who's not fond of animals.

    As for the OP, if the husband doesn't really like animals, the cat may well sense it.
  • yoko onoyoko ono Posts: 633
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    Pandora 9 wrote: »
    I had a new kitten before Christmas and for some reason he has taken a dislike to my husband and son. Every time they go to stroke him he bites them. He is perfectly fine with me but he can have some naughty times where he attacks my slippers. I have encouraged them to feed him sometimes because they never actually look after him. Last night my husband was eating some food and the kitten came over begging for a titbit my husband shouted at him and pushed him away. The little cat then arched his back and went for him. I did laugh but my husband was not amused and said that he wished we had never had the cat in the first place.

    Any suggestions how to make the cat be more friendly towards the men in my family?

    I feel sorry for the poor cat having to live with people who don't really want it. Why expect it to be friendly to one who shouts at it and resents it's presence. Next thing you know they'll have chucked it out to become a stray. Poor cat.
  • daryl_spicerdaryl_spicer Posts: 1,894
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    Pandora 9 wrote: »
    My son is 20 that's why I said my kitten doesn't like men. The kitten likes my daughter when she visits so I did wonder if it was because men have deeper voices.

    No,it is because they mistreat the cat. Kick them out
  • DynopiaDynopia Posts: 1,645
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    Your husband sounds lovely! How can you not fall in love with kittens!
  • Pandora 9Pandora 9 Posts: 2,350
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    yoko ono wrote: »
    I feel sorry for the poor cat having to live with people who don't really want it. Why expect it to be friendly to one who shouts at it and resents it's presence. Next thing you know they'll have chucked it out to become a stray. Poor cat.

    NOBODY will be chucking the cat out believe me !
  • Pandora 9Pandora 9 Posts: 2,350
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    Dynopia wrote: »
    Your husband sounds lovely! How can you not fall in love with kittens!


    He never had cats as a child and used to have a small whippet ... so he doesn't understand why cats won't do as they are told ;)
  • yoko onoyoko ono Posts: 633
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    Pandora 9 wrote: »
    NOBODY will be chucking the cat out believe me !

    Relieved to hear that:)
  • whoever,heywhoever,hey Posts: 30,992
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    Pandora 9 wrote: »
    He never had cats as a child and used to have a small whippet ... so he doesn't understand why cats won't do as they are told ;)

    I never had a cat as a kid either, but i'm not stupid. Dogs can be naughty too, and need training just like cats :rolleyes:.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 1,559
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    My kitten was very naughty when I had him, then turned into a horrid cat :-( I do miss him a he was only 2 when he died.
  • lem ramsaylem ramsay Posts: 1,076
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    I had a cat, Flipper, he was very naughty, scratching and so on... my mum shouted at him, I honestly thought that only made things worse. He was hit by a car and he wasn't even 2 :(, despite his bad temper I was devasted of course when that happened.
    I think your husband should be more patient, he isn't gonna learn anything if you just shout at him, he can't understand he is being scolded because he is doing something wrong.
    I do think it looks like your kitten doesn't find the men in your family particularly pleasant because he can perceive they don't like him.
    I think there was an episode of My cat from hell with a cat named Ruby, who was ok with the man but was very aggressive with the woman. They managed to get her to be nice to the woman too. She had probably been mistreated by some woman and so she was being aggressive with the woman and fine with the man they said, I remember.
  • Susan_A1951Susan_A1951 Posts: 1,081
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    The difference between dogs and cats - and I have had them both for almost forty years.

    You train a dog to live with a family

    You train a family to live with a cat.

    :D
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