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Let's diagnose what's went wrong
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[Deleted User]
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Right guys, so we didn't do very well last night, but were the issues that contributed to our lousy performance.
I'm going to not talk about the quality of the song as music is very subjective as I know some people who love the song but some who hate it.
My reasons for it are
We got swept away with a lot of other upbeat songs at the very start.
The female singer seemed either very nervous or ill.
The staging was good, but the camera didn't show it off at all. Everything was a long shot, we should have been up close when it was glow in the dark time.
There seemed to be no buzz at all, and buzz is most definitely manufactured at places like this.
I'm going to not talk about the quality of the song as music is very subjective as I know some people who love the song but some who hate it.
My reasons for it are
We got swept away with a lot of other upbeat songs at the very start.
The female singer seemed either very nervous or ill.
The staging was good, but the camera didn't show it off at all. Everything was a long shot, we should have been up close when it was glow in the dark time.
There seemed to be no buzz at all, and buzz is most definitely manufactured at places like this.
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The glow in the dark part looked very silly.
It wasn't a song you could sing a long too.
There wasn't a catchy chorus.
They didn't capitalise on the light up suits - the crowd cheered when they lit up.. Why wasn't there a good dance to go a long with it?
Didn't feel very energetic
Most of Europe, it would seem.
Yup... blame the competition, the singer's nerves, the camerawork, the buzzlessness.... but the song?
But it didn't seem to bring any fun at all on the night!! The performance was just so wooden and static. Bianca just looked so akward as well. It was instantly forgettable.
Music is subjective but if it is not strong enough for our own charts is would definitely not be strong enough for Eurovision.
But you are right about the performance. There was a lack of visual energy, especially from the woman. If you are going to perform a fun novelty song you need to just go for it. The man wasn't too bad.
I'd have a good guess our stagers come from other BBC or ITV shows where to make something big they just throw a hundred odd dancers on stage whereas in Eurovision it's just six and they simply don't know how to stage something epic with that amount of people.
I'd try and hire a foreign stager who has done well in the past, or maybe even a music video director as Azerbaijan have done a few times iirc.
I thought it was odd when the clothes lights came on because it seemed like they (the singers) stopped moving. Like if the so much as turned the batteries would fall out. LOL!
Afterwards Norton said there were some problems in rehearsal.
The video in the Cafe de Paris worked because it was stuffed full of dancers - I knew that just 6 people on that huge stage would look stranded and it wouldn't work at all. And that turned out to be precisely the case.
A tongue-in-cheek novelty song like that requires performers with both acting ability, charisma and chemistry between them. Unfortunately neither of the singers had any of these qualities. They looked incredibly stiff, awkward and amateurish.
It's amazing how many times an inexperienced performer has been chosen to represent the UK. And the inevitable result is that the pressure and nerves get the better of them and their singing and confidence evaporates. That certainly looked like what happened last night.
Another problem is culture. I don't believe that the voting is "tactical", but there is an element of people voting for what they know and understand. If Ireland and Malta, who are always the friendliest to the UK, couldn't bring themselves to give us more than a point and Australia couldn't even give us a solitary point, I think the only conclusion you can make is that the song wasn't good enough. Hence, to stand a chance we need to stop trying to utilise our "Britishness", but instead try and attract the Belarussians and the Montenegrins just as much as the Irish.
There are composers out there who specialise in writing for Eurovision, and I'm of the belief that if you can't beat them, join them! Why not get one or two of them in? It goes back to the idea that the BBC have no intention of winning.
What are you talking about? This wasn't a BBC production.
The delegation have final say over the staging, Camera Angles, whats used in the recaps etc.... so the song itself is very much a BBC production even if the show isn't
Any more?
1. Poor singing
2. Lack of Chemistry
3. Annoying DANCE DANCE DANCE in the background
4. poor running order
5. Nothing to WOW the audience (apart from the LED dress)
But, I am thoroughly impressed that the UK, as one of two English speaking countries in the final, had the shittest lyrics of the night.
It was never going to get better after that. On first listen my eyes nearly popped out of my head I was that shocked at how bad the UK entry was.
And now with us meddling in Syria (it's an open secret special forces are there fighting) and the Ukraine is it any wonder countries express their displeasure at voting time.
As for Russia, by the voting for them (especially by Eastern European countries), they may not be as unpopular as our government likes (and us) to think they are over Ukraine and Crimea.