Having babies close together

[Deleted User] · 26/06/13 - 20:04

My son is 6 months today and I've just found out that I'm pregnant again. When this baby is born my son will be about 15 months, so I'll have 2 under 2. Has anyone else been in this situation? How did you cope, financially and emotionally?

Nigel Goodwin · 26/06/13 - 20:10

Never done it, but I know various people who have had babies within a year of each other - basically you just "get on with it"- think what it's like if you have twins!.

thefairydandy · 26/06/13 - 20:20

Think of it this way - the school run and leaving home etc will all be a lot more 'efficient' - when your kids are at different secondary and primaries, it won't last for long, ditto for when they both finally clear off!

My brother is 14 years older than me, so when he left for university, my parents still had another 14 years of the school run to look forward to!

[Deleted User] · 26/06/13 - 20:36

My two are 13 months apart and I'm not going to lie and say it was easy because it wasn't. I couldn't afford disposable nappies so had 2 lots of towelling ones to wash all the time

but I got through it and so will you

26 and 25 years later I have no regrets.
Congratulations

JOHNOR · 26/06/13 - 20:38

My cousin had 16 months between hers & coped well, I think it helped that they were both good sleepers though. Financially it was fine, she could do hand me downs with toys/clothes etc... Another bonus was they keep each other company so she can get on with things.

I have a friend at playgroup with a similar gap and she struggles as her eldest is extremely clingy and does not sleep well at all. So she essentially has two children up at various times throughout the night.

There's pro's & con's to every age gap. I believe everything happens for a reason, you'll cope fine. Congratulations

Button62 · 26/06/13 - 20:39

I was pregnant with my second daughter when number one was 5 months old. It was a bit of a shock at the time but wouldn't have had it any other way.

Advantages : girls grew up together, shared clothes and toys. Number one wasn't jealous when number two arrived as she was too young to understand that emotion. They have always been close friends. Having two close together means that you are not pulled in two directions with two children having different needs at the same time. School days go by so fast having them in successive academic years. You get to be a young grandparent !!

Disadvantages : sleep is a luxury to be enjoyed whenever you can. Life is hectic but ultimately enjoyable ..... really, enjoy it while you can, it seems like only yesterday that I was in your position and now I am on the point of empty nest and it's bloody awful.

Mumof3 · 26/06/13 - 20:45

Congrats & good luck. Mine are relatively apart (3 in 7.5yrs), not through choice, and I've often wondered what aspects might have been easier had they been a little nearer in age.

rikstan87 · 26/06/13 - 21:03

Haven't got advice, just want to say congrats and good luck

x

[Deleted User] · 26/06/13 - 21:03

I had 4 girls under 5 years and I will be honest there were times when I just about made it through the day, but when they were all dry and sleeping well- about 2005, It became a lot easier and I am very proud of our 4 beautiful girls - who incidentally are, on the whole, great friends.

RAINBOWGIRL22 · 26/06/13 - 21:35

My youngest brother and my sister are about 16 months apart. My parents also had me and my brother (aged 10 and 8 when the youngest was born)

Life was chaotic, messy, loud but lots of fun and I wouldn't have it any other way! My bro and sis are still incredibly close as adults too.

I had a condom break when my baby was just a few months and decided I just couldn't chance it and got the MAP.

We cope with what what have to cope with though and I am sure you will be fine.

Take advantage of any offers of help from friends and family!

ChickenWings · 26/06/13 - 21:44

There's 10 months between me and my sister -- you'll cope fine, my mum did! My mum literally got pregnant again within a month after giving birth to me.

AvinAGiraffe · 26/06/13 - 23:19

Congratulations!

There are 20 months between my two boys and it's great. The only problem I ever found was when the oldest was still having daytime naps they never coincided with the baby! Other than that it was great. He was just old enough to help out (fetching nappies and that kind of thing). They share a bedroom (2 boys) and are really very close. Rarely fight and always have each other to play with.

wear thefoxhat · 27/06/13 - 00:13

Noooway wrote: »

My son is 6 months today and I've just found out that I'm pregnant again. When this baby is born my son will be about 15 months, so I'll have 2 under 2. Has anyone else been in this situation? How did you cope, financially and emotionally?

I went the other extreme and have two children born 21 years apart! One child wants to buy anything a la Peppa Pig, the other is getting a mortgage to buy a house!

shmisk · 27/06/13 - 00:32

well I was a twin so no option for my parents!!

DaisyBumbleroot · 27/06/13 - 00:42

Nigel Goodwin wrote: »

Never done it, but I know various people who have had babies within a year of each other - basically you just "get on with it"- think what it's like if you have twins!.

My friends have a two and a half year old and twins aged 8 month. It's hard, very, very hard

[Deleted User] · 27/06/13 - 02:00

Thanks everyone for your replies! Feeling a bit more confident now.

The only extra things I'll need to buy at the moment are a pram and maybe a newborn sling.

I use cloth nappies so I'll just use the same ones on the baby when he/she comes along

The biggest challenge I'm facing is hiding my pregnancy from my family now. I'm hoping I can get away with it until december.

Thanks!

mourinhosmissus · 27/06/13 - 02:15

My mum had five kids aged 5 and under - the youngest being twins!

It was great fun growing up and we were never short of someone to play with.

Mumof5 · 27/06/13 - 03:42

I had 4 under 20 months at one point, along with a 4 year old - I found out I was pregnant with my second set of twins on my first set of twins 1st birthday!

They are now 6, 3 and 19 months - it is noisy, hectic, they fight, I never feel like I have a minute to myself, I'm constantly doing washing and ironing and I go to work for a rest!

On the flip side they are the best thing in the world, we have such fun together, they make me laugh daily and I'd be lost without my girls!

JOHNOR · 27/06/13 - 04:28

Why do you want to keep your pregnancy secret until December?

I'm nosey!

Hogzilla · 27/06/13 - 05:54

I had 2 kids 21 months apart when I had an older son not yet school age- then, a few years later, 2 kids 19 mths apart. I found it nightmarish difficult and couldnt believe it when I went and did it a second time...

The older 2 fought like cat and dog for several years. The younger two are closer but also fight like mad, one minute then the next and best friends - like twins. All depends on the child and its personality, in other words and how well those random characters interact.

My oldest son, 3 years older than the 2nd, was always the most easy going and the least likely to fight. I think if he'd been more difficult I'd have never had more kids.

[Deleted User] · 27/06/13 - 09:01

My Three girls are steps and stairs - to use an old phrase. At one point I was too ****ed with breast feeding and wandering about in a haze of napisan to tell you my name.

It was bloody hard but it's worth it.

I am now the Mother of three young women I'm in awe of. I'm their MUMMY and I'm so proud of them.

They fight and argue and socks will ALWAYS be an issue with them.

They are my girls and I love them

[Deleted User] · 27/06/13 - 09:54

Nigel Goodwin wrote: »

Never done it, but I know various people who have had babies within a year of each other - basically you just "get on with it"- think what it's like if you have twins!.

Exactly the case for my mother, she just had no choice but to get on with it. My brother is one year and eleven days older than my twin and I. We were like triplets.
Mother had a double pushchair but in most photo's my brother is one of the kids sitting in it and either my sister and I are walking.

My sister and brother had curly red hair so people would think they were the twins. My hair was darker and straighter.

[Deleted User] · 27/06/13 - 09:59

Mumof5 wrote: »

I had 4 under 20 months at one point, along with a 4 year old - I found out I was pregnant with my second set of twins on my first set of twins 1st birthday!

They are now 6, 3 and 19 months - it is noisy, hectic, they fight, I never feel like I have a minute to myself, I'm constantly doing washing and ironing and I go to work for a rest!

On the flip side they are the best thing in the world, we have such fun together, they make me laugh daily and I'd be lost without my girls!

Ah what a lovely positive post. But why are you bothering to iron?

[Deleted User] · 27/06/13 - 14:20

DaisyBumbleroot wrote: »

My friends have a two and a half year old and twins aged 8 month. It's hard, very, very hard

I don't know how anyone copes with twins. I've got 4 under 6 with 15 months between by youngest two and it's really hard work. My youngest has been a very difficult baby. I couldn't imagine two of him!

As others have said it's just a case of getting on with it. I have good days and bad days, but things are starting to get easier now the youngest is coming up to 18 months.

I realised the other day I've been constantly changing nappies since 2007!

LostFool · 27/06/13 - 15:24

ChickenWings wrote: »

There's 10 months between me and my sister -- you'll cope fine, my mum did! My mum literally got pregnant again within a month after giving birth to me.

I have friends who are also 10 months apart. They just missed being in the same school year by a couple of weeks.

zelana · 27/06/13 - 15:41

My sons were born 14 months apart & although it was tough going at times I've always I thought I'd had an easier time with mine than my SIL who had two & half years between her boys. I certainly wouldn't put anyone off having two close together.

Hey there!

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