Can't be bothered with career / relationship

[Deleted User] · 02/12/10 - 11:09

Hi

Anyone else feel disillusioned when it comes to career's and/or relationships?

I just can't be bothered. It seems everyone else wants to be in a relationship and have a fancy career, but i have no desire for either.

Why do i want to spend all my life working, moving from place to place, working my way up the career ladder? whats the point? money?, status? .......... really?.

I've never had anything i could call a career, instead i've worked fairly standard office jobs, never earning a huge amout. Having said that however, i have worked since leaving school (didn't goto uni), i saved up, bought a house, made a few stock market investments etc, which means 14 years later (since leaving school), even though i'm earning less, i'm in a much better position financially than many of those chasing careers. So what have they achieved other than having a better sounding job title?

And relationships? ........ i just can't be bothered. I love living alone, i love coming home and having knowone bothering me, i love just being able to watch tv / play pc games. Having said that though, i did recently get talking to someone, we went on a date last week, she wants to see me again, but is already driving me insane, she txts me 500000 times a day ........ AAARrrrrghhhh, i'll be ending things shortly i think. Seriously, i've not had many dates in my life, but this seems typical of the women i've dated ...... why the hell do you txt someone constantly that you barely even know ??? .......... i friggin hate having pointless conversations, i hate having them even more via text !!!

Anyone else like this?, or am i simply the laziest, un-driven, non-motivated person ever?

ukguy

mathertron · 02/12/10 - 11:09

Just sit at home on the dole and fap.

[Deleted User] · 02/12/10 - 11:28

I've decided to do a bit of the career thing and try to get in to housing advice work.

The only reason is so that I get a job that i find interesting and get some satisfaction out of. I'm not bothered by money or status.

It takes up 35 hours of my week so I think it's worth putting the effort into making it something worth my time.

tysonstorm · 02/12/10 - 11:31

Not bothered about a career, I get by on what I get by on. Would like to have a relationship if the right woman came along.

[Deleted User] · 02/12/10 - 11:34

If you have no responsibilities for others then why not do what suits you?
If you are happy or content with your lifestyle and honestly think it is the right one for you, then surely that is enough and you don't need the approval of others.

[Deleted User] · 02/12/10 - 11:36

Its a shame you seem to attrach clingy people when you do choose to date, not everyone is like that and hopefully you will find someone as laid back as yourself. However you seem quite happy on your own and working at your own pace (at least you have a job and support yourself) so if your happy in both respects there isn't a problem. It works for you

[Deleted User] · 02/12/10 - 11:38

Sounds as if you are sorted, besides thinking that the government/society ideal is actually an ideal.

[Deleted User] · 02/12/10 - 11:41

UKguy29 wrote: »

i just can't be bothered. I love living alone, i love coming home and having knowone bothering me, i love just being able to watch tv / play pc games.

So what's the problem. Or did you just want to rub in how
easy your life is, minus others' efforts and challenges?

Amy76 · 02/12/10 - 11:43

Yeah I feel the same as the OP. I am not career minded either. I have always worked though, and I feel this slow and steady approach to earning leaves you with more money than those who go for big careers but have all those years at uni then spending ages not able to get an appropriate job then have to move from place to place for work etc. Then any money earned is gobbled up when they get married and have kids.

I have a good job now, but this is by default as when the vacancy came up at my work there was truly no-one else to do it so I just got given it with no interview.

As for relationships, well you can keep those as far as I am concerned! I love to come home and watch my telly, eat my dinner, go on the internet or whatever else I want to do.

People go 'oh, you should be settling down by now Amy' but I am like, 'why should I'?

Tulip19 · 02/12/10 - 12:14

UKguy29 wrote: »

Hi

Anyone else feel disillusioned when it comes to career's and/or relationships?

I just can't be bothered. It seems everyone else wants to be in a relationship and have a fancy career, but i have no desire for either.

Why do i want to spend all my life working, moving from place to place, working my way up the career ladder? whats the point? money?, status? .......... really?.

I've never had anything i could call a career, instead i've worked fairly standard office jobs, never earning a huge amout. Having said that however, i have worked since leaving school (didn't goto uni), i saved up, bought a house, made a few stock market investments etc, which means 14 years later (since leaving school), even though i'm earning less, i'm in a much better position financially than many of those chasing careers. So what have they achieved other than having a better sounding job title?

And relationships? ........ i just can't be bothered. I love living alone, i love coming home and having knowone bothering me, i love just being able to watch tv / play pc games. Having said that though, i did recently get talking to someone, we went on a date last week, she wants to see me again, but is already driving me insane, she txts me 500000 times a day ........ AAARrrrrghhhh, i'll be ending things shortly i think. Seriously, i've not had many dates in my life, but this seems typical of the women i've dated ...... why the hell do you txt someone constantly that you barely even know ??? .......... i friggin hate having pointless conversations, i hate having them even more via text !!!

Anyone else like this?, or am i simply the laziest, un-driven, non-motivated person ever?ukguy

I've been feeling like this a lot lately. When you really question the point of everything, there isn't really one (beyond wanting to feed/clothe/have shelter for yourself) and just...meh. Whatever.

Those periods or slumps tend to pass (for me anyway); just try riding it out.

mathertron · 02/12/10 - 12:19

I'm kinda in a rut in a way, although I have career ambitions, I'm not sure if they are obtainable and like relationship stuff is f*cking awkward for me, being a bloody great weirdo and all. I think I need to pull my shit together, get my regimen of meds right so I'm relatively stable and be able to focus on something other than myself (not in a totally selfish way, just that my mood stuff requires it of me) before I can share my life with someone and be able to output my work with pride and dilligence.

/ramble/

[Deleted User] · 02/12/10 - 12:29

RE: the text thing. I get how it can be annoying. When I met my OH, we were texting 30 times away until we met up again and decided we were "together". There's the point though... it was a rally of messages... I take it you mean you're ignoring the 50000000 texts a day (and dare I suggest you might be exaggerating a tad!) I can't imagine they all get sent without some input from you, but hey, I'm just saying, I sent "hundreds of texts to someone I don't even know" because he made me laugh and I wanted to know more about him... and now he's the best thing that ever happened to me :P

Also, could you just be feeling a bit lacklusture cos of the weather? I get very despondent over everything during the winter months, convinced I have SAD.

Tulip19 · 02/12/10 - 12:30

mathertron wrote: »

I'm kinda in a rut in a way, although I have career ambitions, I'm not sure if they are obtainable and like relationship stuff is f*cking awkward for me, being a bloody great weirdo and all. I think I need to pull my shit together, get my regimen of meds right so I'm relatively stable and be able to focus on something other than myself (not in a totally selfish way, just that my mood stuff requires it of me) before I can share my life with someone and be able to output my work with pride and dilligence.

/ramble/

I get wha you mean. It is an effort, but doable

mathertron · 02/12/10 - 12:31

Yeah, well at least this year I've been following the doctor's orders rather than using backstreet medecine

I dunno if I feel better for it, but at least I have society on my side sort of thing.

Ragnarok · 02/12/10 - 12:38

The way the economy is going I can't give a stuff about a career ether, with Big time inflation next year on all staple things we need to live. The EU is already crumbling around us, I just can't see the economy being able to cope with next years inflation on top of that. All I can think about is how help maintain some resemblance of a society in my local area in the future while elsewhere the masses will be unprepared and rioting violently that's all they might have left.

davey_wavey · 02/12/10 - 12:40

I've been feeling like this lately as well. I'm just not motivated and feel like I don't really care about anything, (except for my family and friends obviously). I hope it passes soon...

luckylila · 02/12/10 - 12:41

Easy way to sort out the annoying texting thing: get rid of your mobile phone.

I don't have one, and it makes for a lovely quiet life

Career: Never been interested, never will be.

Relationship: Opposite: it's the most fun, joyful, hilarious thing in my life. But then I'm very lucky; my OH is the sweetest, funniest, most undemanding person.

It's just a question of meeting someone who is more fun than TV and games.

What name?? · 02/12/10 - 12:59

You sound sane. It is good to do what makes you happy and comfortatble rather than what people expect of you - especially you don't mind that others do the same but make different choices.

Pressgang · 02/12/10 - 13:41

Mr UKguy, I feel the same as you, I never wanted to climb the career ladder and so I've had an awful lot of different jobs in different sectors.

As an older person, it's actually working out better in this economic climate as I have a lot of varied skills to offer a potential employer.

And I too love being alone, I'll happily work with other people, I love it in fact, but when my front door closes ...

The only advice I can give is... if you're doing anything you don't enjoy, and you won't hurt anyone too much by changing things, do so. You've only got one life and you owe it to yourself to be as happy as you can.

Constant PMT · 02/12/10 - 13:51

I dont get the career thing either. Atleast not until my teens are older. I prefer to go to my boring job & come home, because it's convenient with the kids at the moment.
And as for relationships, er no thanks. Been there done it, since I was 15 until I was about 37. I cant think of anything worse right now than having to make the effort with all that.
I am a mum at the moment with a home, pets, a car to run, bills to pay, & the added expense of a relationship just doesn't appeal, let alone all that texting malarky people seem to need. No ta. I like slobbing out in my pj's, & doing my hobby. Life's good right now the way it is!

[Deleted User] · 02/12/10 - 14:10

I used to be obsessed with getting a 'proper' career when I was in my twenties. I felt frustrated with the kind of work I was doing (secretarial work) and was desperate to move up the career ladder, so to speak. It never happened! Now I couldn't care less. I'm not working at the mo but I'm hoping to get into some kind of advisory work as it really appeals to me. I'm thinking of applying to do some voluntary work in this field in the New Year.

As for relationships I couldn't be a*sed. I live on my own and love having my own space and not having someone sticking their big nose into my business. It's so nice just to be able to sit and read a book or watch TV without someone poking and pawing at me!

[Deleted User] · 02/12/10 - 14:27

A career is not the end-all, be-all like some people say they are. I'm married, but if you are happy being outside of a relationship, then that's great.Relationships aren't the end-all, be-all either. You know what you are and there is no point in making two people miserable.

[Deleted User] · 02/12/10 - 14:28

Silver Light wrote: »

I used to be obsessed with getting a 'proper' career when I was in my twenties. I felt frustrated with the kind of work I was doing (secretarial work) and was desperate to move up the career ladder, so to speak. It never happened! Now I couldn't care less. I'm not working at the mo but I'm hoping to get into some kind of advisory work as it really appeals to me. I'm thinking of applying to do some voluntary work in this field in the New Year.

As for relationships I couldn't be a*sed. I live on my own and love having my own space and not having someone sticking their big nose into my business. It's so nice just to be able to sit and read a book or watch TV without someone poking and pawing at me!

Get married-- it soon puts paid to all of that!

whitecliffe · 02/12/10 - 14:47

I have never been career orientated, I have somehow managed to get a decent job that pays well but never wanted the responsibility that climbing the career ladder entails. My partner on the other hand is career obsessed and has been very single minded in advancing it through education and picking the right jobs for career progression. He has worked exceptionally hard and has now achieved many of his goals and reaps the rewards.

I guess we are all different - thank god otherwise how boring would the world be - so what is right for one might not suit another.

As for relationships - sometimes I miss my single days but am glad to have a loving caring partner.

linnylou · 02/12/10 - 14:51

I've never been a career woman really, even though I've held a few supervisor/managerial positions in previous jobs. Now, I've been with the same company for a few years, not in any sort of managerial position and have no desire to move up the ladder. I get paid decently enough, and can earn bonuses and incentives.

And, as I now live on my own again, I love that I can do whatever the hell I want to when I get home, I don't have to bother cleaning up the place ready for another half to come home to, and I don't have to bother making conversation with anyone if I don't want to, particularly as my job involves talking on the phone all day to customers.

I always loved living by myself before I got married, and now I'm divorced, I love being by myself again. Being in a relationship isn't the be all and end all. It's great to feel free-spirited again and do things on my own terms.

You sound perfectly normal to me, ukguy

quatro · 02/12/10 - 15:05

I've never been career orientated either. We aren't all the same. Instead I've steadily worked at doing places up at my own pace, in my own way and have my own place, mortgage-free for 22 years now, and at a level I am happy with it. Sod everyone else and what they think.

Too many people are like sheep and can't think of their own way through life. Too worried about what other people think, conforming and peer pressure.

For me life has been about my kids [now grandchildren] - they were and are, the reason for my life.

I have also given up on relationships - such a hassle, nagging and being critiscised, them not wanting to give me space or even my own identity. Far happier on my own - have peace and can be myself.
Like I said we are all different - we dont all have to be the same. Some of us can think for ourselves and not follow the crowd and societys 'norm's.

Hey there!

Quick Links

Can't be bothered with career / relationship

Comments