Work issue - I walked out of work!

[Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 2,216
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Last night i was so stressed that i walked out of work and ive tried to get a doctor appointment as i believe im depressed but am unable to til tomorrow - as ive had trouble getting out of bed and to deal with the stress i have gone out night after night and got drunk.

My employer has not been very sympathetic when explained the situation they have told me they are to call me in today as of the seriousness of my actions and said ive broke my contract. And all they asked was there any probles with work and will i be working today.

Not really sure if i can make a complaint of their handling of this but im finding their approach to this is just making me more stressed.
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 489
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    brooksider wrote: »
    Last night i was so stressed that i walked out of work and ive tried to get a doctor appointment as i believe im depressed but am unable to til tomorrow - as ive had trouble getting out of bed and to deal with the stress i have gone out night after night and got drunk.

    My employer has not been very sympathetic when explained the situation they have told me they are to call me in today as of the seriousness of my actions and said ive broke my contract. And all they asked was there any probles with work and will i be working today.

    Not really sure if i can make a complaint of their handling of this but im finding their approach to this is just making me more stressed.

    If you believe you have work related stress, they have to be reasonable about it. A girl I used to work with had 2 weeks off due to work related stress - she was basically working two full time jobs, working late and sometimes the weekends and it all got too much for her that she ended up crying at work when it became too much. The company we both worked for fully understood and supported the fact she was off due to work related stress.

    If you truly believe this is what you have, they should not treating it as if you are just trying to grab some sort of attention. Tell them you have booked an appointment with the doctors, and explain to your doctor how you feeling.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 2,216
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    Well it just became too much for me the stress i was feeling so i just walked out - but its more than work related stress - im unsure why im depressed and the only way ive dealt with it is going out night after night and drinking.

    And i have been called in today and not sure what i can say as all they have been concerned with is the serious of my action and how i broke my contract / weather the problem is with work and will i be coming back to work.
  • Hopeless_SavageHopeless_Savage Posts: 2,835
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    Some employers are very touchy around stress issues coz they're so scared of being sued or something, the sooner you get a doctor to see you and give their opinion the better!
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 489
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    brooksider wrote: »
    Well it just became too much for me the stress i was feeling so i just walked out - but its more than work related stress - im unsure why im depressed and the only way ive dealt with it is going out night after night and drinking.

    And i have been called in today and not sure what i can say as all they have been concerned with is the serious of my action and how i broke my contract / weather the problem is with work and will i be coming back to work.

    I think you probably do have a pinch of work related stress. We all get stressed and depressed with our jobs, but unfortunately, we've got to do it to keep our lifestyles on the go.

    Getting pissed every night will not be making you feel better. It might do at the time, but waking up with a hangover makes it even worse for getting out of bed! lol.

    Explain to your boss or whoever it is thats calling you in, that you feel really stressed with your job at the minute and you just don't feel motivated anymore. Do you still want to work there? Or do you want a change of career or just move away from that company? If you would like to stay where u r working, just tell them that, but just say you have made an appointment with a doctor because you feel like you are at the lowest of the low.

    They should not be enraged and they should understand. It probably wasn't the best idea to storm out of work last night, but you must stress to them that you feel so stressed and depressed at the minute, and also apologise.
  • waving not drowwaving not drow Posts: 3,821
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    Yeah, explain to them that you have this medical condition that you are seeking treatment for (and when it is under control there will be no repetition of the behaviour they have found problematic).

    Try to arrange (in consultation with your doctor) a certified period of sick leave so you can recover from the symptoms of your illness.

    My sympathies of course and I know that you must be feeling highly charged at the moment but try to play it 'professionally' with your employers.
  • satellitesatellite Posts: 8,181
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    Yes, definitely go to your doctor. If he/she thinks that you're suffering from stress or depression, they will sign you off work for a while, and whilst that's happening, I don't think your employers can do a thing about it. Perhaps (through the doctor), take some time off to recuperate and consider whether or not you have any alternative employment options - perhaps your current job just isn't the right place for you if it's making you feel upset. Also if your doctor thinks you're suffering from depression they can refer you to a counsellor or prescribe some medication?

    I know it's difficult, but the demon drink is no answer, I know, it happened to me years ago. Alcohol can numb your feelings and make you forget your troubles for a short period of times - but your problems will still be there the next morning and with a hangover, you'll feel worse than ever.

    You're better off seeking help from a (hopefully) understanding GP.
  • stinkymousestinkymouse Posts: 1,573
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    go see your doctor and if you tell him you are suffering from depression and he will give you medication,but he wont sign you off work untill you have been off for 1 week,because you must self certificate yourself off sick for the first week,then your GP will sign you off work,which you will need to send into work....once your doctor has done that,theres not a goddamn thing your employers can do,you have been signed off work..period !! and if you have been at your present job for over a year you will recieve full pay for 6 months,dont let them bully you into going back to work or threatening you with the sack,they legally carnt do that with a doctors note.
    If you are suffering from mental problems the disability discrimination act gives disabled workers protection against discriminatiion,and your boss by law must make resonable changes to help..ie less hours or work load to ease stress,but you must have had the condition for at least 12 months.
    If i was you and you are stressed about the job,stay on long term sick,getting full pay and hopefully the company will get sick of you being on the sick and give you medicall retirement with a lump sum(amount depending on how long you have been there) and then get another job:)...you will also get 12 weeks pay in lou of notice too!!
  • lobeservelobeserve Posts: 7,924
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    brooksider wrote: »
    Last night i was so stressed that i walked out of work and ive tried to get a doctor appointment as i believe im depressed but am unable to til tomorrow - as ive had trouble getting out of bed and to deal with the stress i have gone out night after night and got drunk.

    My employer has not been very sympathetic when explained the situation they have told me they are to call me in today as of the seriousness of my actions and said ive broke my contract. And all they asked was there any probles with work and will i be working today.

    Not really sure if i can make a complaint of their handling of this but im finding their approach to this is just making me more stressed.

    If you went home sick, you have not broken your contract.

    Your employer is very unprofessional.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 890
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    This isn't intended to be a rude or horrible comment, but you mention your going out every night drinking. When you walked out of work where did you go?

    Could it possibly be that you’re not stressed you are maybe abusing alcohol and these are just symptoms of that?

    Is there a history of alcoholism in your family at all?

    I really don’t mean this to be a nasty comment or anything just purely saying it might be a possible reason, in which case your company should offer you the required support to get yourself back on track.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 8,360
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    If it may be an alcohol problem, its worth taking the quiz at the AA website to help you decide if you have a problem:
    http://www.alcoholics-anonymous.org/en_is_aa_for_you.cfm?PageID=71

    My PM box is always open if you want to talk.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 385
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    i suspect the reason your employer appears to be less than sympathetic is that it seems you walked off rather than speaking to them first; they have a duty of care to you and their other employees and would need to know about your whereabouts.. aside from that most employers would consider it to be a matter of courtesey to let them know what is going on.. and may construe your actions as gross misconduct
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 1,446
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    Using alcohol to self medicate for depression and stress is a well known medical problem, you aren't alone. Basically, alcohol is helping you relax and forget the stresses, but doesn't treat it.

    I'd tell your boss that you are ill and seeking help. Go to the GP and tell them what you've told us and hopefully they'll be sympathetic and give you the time and medications you need. I've had many work collegues in the same position.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 4,725
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    lobeserve wrote: »
    If you went home sick, you have not broken your contract.

    Your employer is very unprofessional.

    The employer wasn't being unproffesional, the OP said they walked out, you can't just going doing that without speaking to management first.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 2,216
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    Seeing the doctor tomorrow.

    :cool:
  • SystemSystem Posts: 2,096,970
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    God, I sympathise with you. I've had time off work in the past with stress/depression, and, if I'm honest, slightly drink-related stuff (i.e.getting in stressed from work, getting too pissed because of that, then being too hungover for work), this only happened a few times but still enough to make me worry. Not that I'm saying this is what's happened to you OP, though it sounds similar.

    I'm now in a job I love and everything's cool, but I still overdo the booze occasionally, esp weekends. Just a bad old habit I'd got into.

    Now trying to rein it back in a bit (never totally!!!, still enjoy it too much!)
  • sy278sy278 Posts: 1,168
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    You can self certify as being ill for 5 working days, this gives you time to seek doctors consultation to get a proper doctors line signing you off, assuming the doctor agrees you are stressed.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 2,514
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    I was off work about a year ago with stress, during that time my company wrote to me and said they were minded to sack me. I checked with the CAB and they said that if I was not with the company for a year they could do what they liked.
    But, they could not dismiss me without pay.
    So I got one months pay and my holiday money. It was good but I couldn't work until I got my P45 at the end of the month.
    They can only dismiss you without pay for gross incompetence and that is hard to prove unless you actually hit someone or lied to a client.
    Check out the drinking but go to the CAB.
  • KamiKami Posts: 1,983
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    You should have talked to your employer and tried to work things out with them before walking off. Getting signed off now will just help annoy them.

    There's far too much of this "I'm stressed - must get signed off" going around, talk to your employer first, TRY to work things out with them, if it doesn't work - look for a new job, if you can't get one - see your doctor and perhaps being signed off will urge your employer to do something more drastic about the situation.

    Walking out of work is just plain stupid. I'm sorry but you have to take responsibility for your actions and frankly if I was your employer I'd be less than happy at being kept in the dark and concerned that you'd rather be at home on your own than in work trying to sort things out.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 1,800
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    I feel for you.

    I was depressed around this time last year and had many days off work, my employer was not impressed, he shouted and had no sympathy what so ever when I explained my situation. I walked out the office after that meeting and never went back.
    I was going through enough as it was without having some fat boss shout at me and make me feel like I was the bad person.

    Arrange a meeting with your boss and discuss your situation.
  • NathalieRNathalieR Posts: 16,004
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    Hey OP, while I do feel sorry for you and your pain, walking out of work with no word doesnt look good to them. I know if i were to walk out here without even telling my manager or team leader, it would not go down very well. I think you should have sent an email or had a quick word with someone and then gone. Your company are going over the top maybe with the talk of breaking contracts etc but unfortunately i can see why they are p****d off.

    I think you should apologise but explain why you did it and what you're going through.

    Good luck x
  • SystemSystem Posts: 2,096,970
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    Hi brooksider.

    I can relate to what you are going through.

    Like others have said, cut back on the booze - alcohol is a depressant. It may help you to de-stress - but only in the short term. Lack of sleep will make stress much worse too.

    Having a week or two off may well help you to put things in perspective, and see if the job you are is really for you.

    However, it may be that you may be experiencing early onset symptoms of clinical depression - so it is important to see a GP.

    Keep your employer informed, and be honest with them.

    If they want to speak with you, it may be a good idea to have someone else present too.

    Oh, and good luck. Don't forget there is more to life than the world of work - your health is more important, and we are only on this planet for on average three score years + ten (perhaps a little more) - it is not very long really, so best to make the most to make ours lives what we truly want.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 784
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    go see your doctor and if you tell him you are suffering from depression and he will give you medication,but he wont sign you off work untill you have been off for 1 week,because you must self certificate yourself off sick for the first week,then your GP will sign you off work,which you will need to send into work....once your doctor has done that,theres not a goddamn thing your employers can do,you have been signed off work..period !! and if you have been at your present job for over a year you will recieve full pay for 6 months,dont let them bully you into going back to work or threatening you with the sack,they legally carnt do that with a doctors note.
    If you are suffering from mental problems the disability discrimination act gives disabled workers protection against discriminatiion,and your boss by law must make resonable changes to help..ie less hours or work load to ease stress,but you must have had the condition for at least 12 months.
    If i was you and you are stressed about the job,stay on long term sick,getting full pay and hopefully the company will get sick of you being on the sick and give you medicall retirement with a lump sum(amount depending on how long you have been there) and then get another job:)...you will also get 12 weeks pay in lou of notice too!!

    A doctor can sign you off at any time...medical certificates only have end dates, so if they intend to sign you off past the end of the self-certification period they can do so immediately.

    The amount of time off on full pay depends on what it says in your contract, which could be only a few weeks...also the amount of pay in lieu of notice will depend on your contracted notice period (sometimes as little as one week).

    I agree with what stinkymouse says about not allowing yourself to be bullied, though - walking out without telling anyone is obviously to be avoided if possible, but may be an indication of the severity of the stress and shouldn't count against you with your employer if the doctor's note confirms that that's what's wrong. I don't think it's a good idea to discuss your health with you employer before talking to the doctor about it.

    It might be an idea to keep a record of any contact with your employer about this issue (including keeping notes of any verbal communication) in case it escalates and you end up wanting to complain/sue.
  • BIzzisguyBIzzisguy Posts: 154
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    Hope all goes well for you, but I know with the company I work for, you would have just sacked yourself for walking out of work.

    A company can sack you for gross misconduct for this, under health and safety laws, they have an obligation towards their employee's and if a fire had broken out and you were unaccounted for, they would have had to endanger the lives of the emergency services sending them in to find you, only you weren't there..you were down the pub and now 3 fireman have died..... a case of gross misconduct...

    good luck though..
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 329
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    BIzzisguy wrote: »
    Hope all goes well for you, but I know with the company I work for, you would have just sacked yourself for walking out of work.

    A company can sack you for gross misconduct for this, under health and safety laws, they have an obligation towards their employee's and if a fire had broken out and you were unaccounted for, they would have had to endanger the lives of the emergency services sending them in to find you, only you weren't there..you were down the pub and now 3 fireman have died..... a case of gross misconduct...

    good luck though..

    So do you have to declare it every time you go to lunch?
  • Jimmy ConnorsJimmy Connors Posts: 117,512
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    If your Dr agrees that you have work related stress. How long can they legally sign you off for? I heard 13 weeks max because stress is not considered a disability.:confused: Does anybody know for sure?
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