Someone put poo under my festive garden erection

Charcole911Charcole911 Posts: 6,353
Forum Member
I was in the garden for hours last night working up a right old sweat trying to get an erection up for all the Neighbours to admire. It was a wooden reindeer that I had painted just like Rudolph, with the red nose too.

Went out just now to feed my pet goat, and there is a load of poo underneath it!! I am certain its not goat, dog or horse poo.

I think one of the other neighbours may have got jealous of my erection and put poo under it. Enough to upset and distress me, but not enough for me to phone the police and get them charged over.

Now I need to dispose of it. I'm going to shovel it up and put it one of my bins, but not sure if I should put it in the grey or brown bin. Which is the right one to use?
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Comments

  • RussellIanRussellIan Posts: 12,034
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    That's nice deer
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 3,186
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    :confused: thats nice thanks for sharing
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 6,252
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    Maybe it was a jealous snowman?
  • Red+BloodedRed+Blooded Posts: 4,676
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    I was in the garden for hours last night working up a right old sweat trying to get an erection up for all the Neighbours to admire. It was a wooden reindeer that I had painted just like Rudolph, with the red nose too.

    ?

    Call Me Immature, but that made me laugh.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 36,630
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    Cool story bro.
  • Granny McSmithGranny McSmith Posts: 19,622
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    Perhaps the real Rudolph was passing and this is his comment on your erection.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 5,733
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    I am certain its not goat, dog or horse poo.
    Clearly someone who knows their poo. ;)
    (Shades of "Dooo South"?)
  • crazychris12crazychris12 Posts: 26,254
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    You should be a novelist OP!
  • SentenzaSentenza Posts: 12,114
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    O Rly?
  • AzagothAzagoth Posts: 10,169
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    Does your neighbour have two girls and if so, were they playing with a cup earlier?
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 445
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    This sounds like a plausible and 100% true story.
  • linnyloulinnylou Posts: 18,770
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    The little shits. Grrr
  • Ricky D GervaisRicky D Gervais Posts: 2,429
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    How does this person not get perma-banned for these threads?
  • Bedsit BobBedsit Bob Posts: 24,344
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    I am certain its not goat, dog or horse poo.

    Maybe it's reindeer :confused:
  • RussellIanRussellIan Posts: 12,034
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    Bedsit Bob wrote: »
    Maybe it's reindeer :confused:

    No love, it's snow :D
  • darkmothdarkmoth Posts: 12,265
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    How does this person not get perma-banned for these threads?

    **shrugs**

    Maybe the mods are feeling festive :D
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 6,252
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    How does this person not get perma-banned for these threads?

    Banned? For this? Really?

    Iighten up ! :D
  • TheMaskTheMask Posts: 10,219
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    I was in the garden for hours last night working up a right old sweat trying to get an erection up for all the Neighbours to admire. It was a wooden reindeer that I had painted just like Rudolph, with the red nose too.

    Went out just now to feed my pet goat, and there is a load of poo underneath it!! I am certain its not goat, dog or horse poo.

    I think one of the other neighbours may have got jealous of my erection and put poo under it. Enough to upset and distress me, but not enough for me to phone the police and get them charged over.

    Now I need to dispose of it. I'm going to shovel it up and put it one of my bins, but not sure if I should put it in the grey or brown bin. Which is the right one to use?



    Sorry about that but i was busting...:p
  • missy83missy83 Posts: 14,299
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    Just flush it down the toilet.
  • Mike HawkeMike Hawke Posts: 367
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    Do you live near Paula Radcliffe?

    </topical about a decade ago>
  • Ricky D GervaisRicky D Gervais Posts: 2,429
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    HollyG wrote: »
    Banned? For this? Really?

    Iighten up ! :D
    These stupid spam threads are constant and have never been funny. Some of the petty things people get banned for round here you'd think this one would've been a goner long ago.
  • RussellIanRussellIan Posts: 12,034
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    This is transparently worthy of Chatter, where it'll probably get relegated to.
  • edExedEx Posts: 13,460
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    Maybe it's not poo at all. Someone might have joined the festive spirit and given you some Christmas puddings.

    Best you go taste one to find out.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 6,207
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    Sounds like you are talented .
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 6,252
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    These stupid spam threads are constant and have never been funny. Some of the petty things people get banned for round here you'd think this one would've been a goner long ago.

    It doesn't upset me.

    *shrugs*

    I think the fun in threads like these are the quick witted reply's from others!
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