Just remembered another cock up I made. :rolleyes:
A guy I used to work with retired but then passed away shortly after so I wanted to go and see the fella off. I was working Nights so in order to get up in time for his Funeral I put in two hours leave and went home early.
Arrived at the 'Crem' and saw a number of folk gathering round but never having met any of his family before, I didn't know anyone and I was a bit annoyed that nobody else from work had bothered to attend.
Cortege arrives, coffin taken in and everybody filed in after. I took a seat and picked up and Order of Service.........which was in memory of Mary. That's weird I thought.....i've come to see Trevor off. Went to have a word with one of the Crem chaps who looked through his list, then said, "oh yes.....Mr Davies was cremated this morning at 10am."
I was at the wrong Funeral........Trev had 'gone up the chimney' four hours earlier. :rolleyes::rolleyes::o
Hahahahahaha - love it
I have to admit to being fairly cock up free. BUT (and I have mentioned it here before) we had a really annoying client, who happened to be our best client, who used to change his mind on what he wanted every 2 seconds. I was in a bad mood and sure enough an email came through asking for something else to be changed. I forwarded it to my boss slagging this guy off and calling him a lot of bad words ... but instead of pressing the forward button, I had pressed 'reply' and sent it to the client instead.
I was tasked with pouring the ashes of my deceased Grandfather onto a memorial garden as no one else could face doing it and I was buggered if I was going to let a member of staff do it. Would have been disrespectful like. Right noble I was. Unfortunately I chucked him upwind and he came flying back covering the lot of us - including his children. Bit of stunned silence there, I must admit.
I was tasked with pouring the ashes of my deceased Grandfather onto a memorial garden as no one else could face doing it and I was buggered if I was going to let a member of staff do it. Would have been disrespectful like. Right noble I was. Unfortunately I chucked him upwind and he came flying back covering the lot of us - including his children. Bit of stunned silence there, I must admit.
I was tasked with pouring the ashes of my deceased Grandfather onto a memorial garden as no one else could face doing it and I was buggered if I was going to let a member of staff do it. Would have been disrespectful like. Right noble I was. Unfortunately I chucked him upwind and he came flying back covering the lot of us - including his children. Bit of stunned silence there, I must admit.
Oh my **** ups know no end. They just get more and more outrageous as time goes on. In fact, my entire existence is a series of **** ups only interrupted by the very occasional bit of clear blue water. Then it's back to the **** ups.
When I had qualified as a hairdresser, my first client wanted highlights (back in the 80s when you used a rubber cap things with holes in) Gave her some great bleached highlights, really pleased with myself, took her to the sink to wash out bleach and take cap off...and all the highlights went down the plug hole
Not a very happy client (with a somewhat depleted head of brown hair )
When I had qualified as a hairdresser, my first client wanted highlights (back in the 80s when you used a rubber cap things with holes in) Gave her some great bleached highlights, really pleased with myself, took her to the sink to wash out bleach and take cap off...and all the highlights went down the plug hole
Not a very happy client (with a somewhat depleted head of brown hair )
That reminds me of a story my mam told me. She was a hairdresser when I was younger, and one day a woman wanted her hair bleached. My mam went through the usual questions with her and bleached her hair like she'd done a thousand times before. After she'd washed the peroxide out and started to blow dry the woman's hair it started falling out - as my mam was brushing through her hair, entire chucks literally started breaking off. Turns out the woman had lied about having not permed her hair, so the bleach on top of the perm solution had caused her hair to fry.
Many years ago i had to do an update on a mainframe and the instructions were faxed over so loaded the update tape and got going following the instructions and it said to delete a file from the system disk...so the i deleted it and rebooted it only to find it wouldn't kick in so no problem just restore the system disk and job done....the backup routine had been faulty for months so no backups and a very expensive computer had suddenly become useless
Queue a serious panic and some rather heated phonecalls to the mainframe company who realised they had never bothered to check the notes and we was the first company to apply the update and of course with the site production systems all down everyone was looking at me while two of the suppliers best engineers turned up to do some magic to restore the file and get us going again
Someone said it cost nearly a million quid in lost production as the system was down for a day and a half instead of the planned 2-3 hours
The tears on my bosses face when he saw the overtime for that month was priceless
On the Tube one day after finishing work, I saw my brother-in-law ahead of me on an 'up' escalator. I went bounding up behind him and bit him on the shoulder. So far so good.
It wasn't my brother-in-law.
Had a very very uncomfortable ride to the top until I could disappear into the crowd. The guy looked more shocked than angry and I think was a bit flummoxed by my 'Sorry, I thought you were my brother-in-law ...' excuse.
I'm sorry, but that made me spray my coffee all my computer screen, I'm sitting here crying with laughter and getting funny looks from my colleague
Mm, well it was pretty funny in retrospect. Me Mum - ie, his daughter - didn't look that impressed though as she coughed him oot. Come to think of it, I didn't feature too prominently in the will. I'm sure this was unconnected.
I threw away all the signalling maps for South Crewe railway station once. It was a happy six weeks hoping nothing went wrong before the new maps I'd made could actually be used.
I did use to get fairly close, but not quite a snog.
My sucky tube had a life of its own though.
I had to pretend to my dentist that he could have dropped it on the floor.
After a frantic look, of course he never found it...I did catch him inadvertently scanning the floor for days after, with a haunted look in his eyes
I don't think I've ever made a major f*ckup, but I've made plenty of mistakes. Like we all have, I presume.
I think my biggest regret in life is not being able to have a serious relationship with a couple of ladies I met in south Wales, when I was in my early twenties, both of which I truly adore to this day. We dated, but I was too young to be seriously committed.
I've mentioned on here before about one of them, that I still miss (dunno where she is) and now the other lady (dunno again).
I think my biggest regret in life is not being able to have a serious relationship with a couple of ladies I met in south Wales, when I was in my early twenties, both of which I truly adore to this day. We dated, but I was too young to be seriously committed.
I've mentioned on here before about one of them, that I still miss (dunno where she is) and now the other lady (dunno again).
Can't you try and find them jra? It's nice catching up with old friends.
Last year I was at a music festival with my best friend and on one day we walked to the local tescos to get more supplies. We paid for the shopping and I went outside with the shopping while she went to buy cigarettes. All of a suddenly she came out, red as a beetroot and said we needed to leave ASAP. Me, (being a good friend and noticing how embarrassed she looked) refused to walk a step until she told me what she had done....
Turned out that while in the queue, she heard what she thought was a dog barking and tutted loudly while saying (out loud) "WHO would bring a DOG into Tescos??" - turns out it was a severly disabled child in a specially adapted pram behind her in the queue. The childs family who were with her all heard my friend say this. She was horrified once she realised where the sound had come from!!
Even now, I only have to sing "Who let the dogs in....." to my friend to get her feeling embarrassed and ashamed!!
Comments
Did you find it?
Hahahahahaha - love it
I have to admit to being fairly cock up free. BUT (and I have mentioned it here before) we had a really annoying client, who happened to be our best client, who used to change his mind on what he wanted every 2 seconds. I was in a bad mood and sure enough an email came through asking for something else to be changed. I forwarded it to my boss slagging this guy off and calling him a lot of bad words ... but instead of pressing the forward button, I had pressed 'reply' and sent it to the client instead.
Ooops
Vosne :eek:
Yep, that's pretty much how everyone looked
Was still dusting him off some hours later in the pub.
I'm sorry, but that made me spray my coffee all my computer screen, I'm sitting here crying with laughter and getting funny looks from my colleague
I don't think I've ever made a major f*ckup, but I've made plenty of mistakes. Like we all have, I presume.
You seem to be a pretty level-headed individual.
My mum did that with the coal from a barbecue, she somehow managed to put it into a bin bag :eek: and than it set on fire.
Not a very happy client (with a somewhat depleted head of brown hair )
That reminds me of a story my mam told me. She was a hairdresser when I was younger, and one day a woman wanted her hair bleached. My mam went through the usual questions with her and bleached her hair like she'd done a thousand times before. After she'd washed the peroxide out and started to blow dry the woman's hair it started falling out - as my mam was brushing through her hair, entire chucks literally started breaking off. Turns out the woman had lied about having not permed her hair, so the bleach on top of the perm solution had caused her hair to fry.
Queue a serious panic and some rather heated phonecalls to the mainframe company who realised they had never bothered to check the notes and we was the first company to apply the update and of course with the site production systems all down everyone was looking at me while two of the suppliers best engineers turned up to do some magic to restore the file and get us going again
Someone said it cost nearly a million quid in lost production as the system was down for a day and a half instead of the planned 2-3 hours
The tears on my bosses face when he saw the overtime for that month was priceless
You mean you PASSED your test. Another little f&ck up you can add to your list:D
It wasn't my brother-in-law.
Had a very very uncomfortable ride to the top until I could disappear into the crowd. The guy looked more shocked than angry and I think was a bit flummoxed by my 'Sorry, I thought you were my brother-in-law ...' excuse.
Mm, well it was pretty funny in retrospect. Me Mum - ie, his daughter - didn't look that impressed though as she coughed him oot. Come to think of it, I didn't feature too prominently in the will. I'm sure this was unconnected.
Isn't snogging the patients frowned upon? :eek:
I did use to get fairly close, but not quite a snog.
My sucky tube had a life of its own though.
I had to pretend to my dentist that he could have dropped it on the floor.
After a frantic look, of course he never found it...I did catch him inadvertently scanning the floor for days after, with a haunted look in his eyes
I think my biggest regret in life is not being able to have a serious relationship with a couple of ladies I met in south Wales, when I was in my early twenties, both of which I truly adore to this day. We dated, but I was too young to be seriously committed.
I've mentioned on here before about one of them, that I still miss (dunno where she is) and now the other lady (dunno again).
Lol. Hubby burnt our house down.
Can't you try and find them jra? It's nice catching up with old friends.
I've had a quick look via the usual web sites, but no success.
I have taken a major step today, regarding one of them, by posting a letter to their last known address. I don't expect anything to come of it.
Turned out that while in the queue, she heard what she thought was a dog barking and tutted loudly while saying (out loud) "WHO would bring a DOG into Tescos??" - turns out it was a severly disabled child in a specially adapted pram behind her in the queue. The childs family who were with her all heard my friend say this. She was horrified once she realised where the sound had come from!!
Even now, I only have to sing "Who let the dogs in....." to my friend to get her feeling embarrassed and ashamed!!