Liz Jones - YOU magazine (Part 4)

16869717374471

Comments

  • DiamondDollDiamondDoll Posts: 21,460
    Forum Member
    ✭✭✭
    I'm no expert and I do think Liz Jones is decidedly odd but she is doing exactly what she is paid to do and I take it all with a huge pinch of salt.

    She is paid to be controversial and this thread alone is testament to her doing her job well. I think she'll be busy reading at the first opportunity.;-)
  • Mr CurmudgeonMr Curmudgeon Posts: 126
    Forum Member
    I gather from the DM reporting of CBB nominations today that Liz is offended by someone saying that she isn't a celebrity, her retort being that she has 60 million readers who follow her.

    Her narcissism seems to know no bounds. She actually thinks that she's single-handedly responsible for people reading the DM ! :o

    Someone ought to point out that a fraction of those 60 million read her vacuous postings, and yet a smaller fraction ever bother going further after reading the first paragraph. If an exit-poll were taken of those taken who actually make it to the end of her farticles would probably give a more accurate result.

    The majority would either vote for the DM to sack her, or for the men in the white coats to come and take her away.

    Then again, she probably could be construed as a 'celebrity' by CBB standards as the majority of the inmates belong in some place other than the public-eye both for their own mental health as well as to preserve public-sanity.
  • Mr CurmudgeonMr Curmudgeon Posts: 126
    Forum Member
    I'm no expert and I do think Liz Jones is decidedly odd but she is doing exactly what she is paid to do and I take it all with a huge pinch of salt.

    She is paid to be controversial and this thread alone is testament to her doing her job well. I think she'll be busy reading at the first opportunity.;-)

    What you're saying almost makes Liz out to be a great employee, and suggests that both the DM and Liz are sitting down after and having a great laugh over her 'japes'.

    I don't quite see things in this way. She isn't a journalist who is writing tongue in cheek to provoke a reaction... she's actually a total misfit who believes what she writes 100%, though she may be 'wheeled-out' by the paper when the occasion arises for a misguided cannon to be fired off.

    The problem is that she actually truly believes the rubbish that she writes.
  • Molly BloomMolly Bloom Posts: 2,318
    Forum Member
    ✭✭✭

    She is paid to be controversial

    Well, this is why I have such an unbridled hatred of the media. All they live for is to upset people and destroy lives. I am so ashamed of our press when being "controversial" (or, more truthfully, nasty and crazed) is actively encouraged and celebrated.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 125
    Forum Member
    It's a wonder she's only sold 27 copies of the Misery Memoir then...
  • newbabynewbaby Posts: 824
    Forum Member
    ✭✭
    It seems La Jones has declared she will not be writing about her time in whatever the thing's called. Which, on past history, is a pretty clear indication that there will be a raft of articles.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 8,510
    Forum Member
    I don't know why someone with severe issues as her was allowed onto Big Brother
  • BellagioBellagio Posts: 3,249
    Forum Member
    ✭✭✭
    And finally, her scrawny arse is out the door...
  • Molly BloomMolly Bloom Posts: 2,318
    Forum Member
    ✭✭✭
    I don't know why someone with severe issues as her was allowed onto Big Brother

    Happens across the board in TV. It seems the media are totally devoid of any responsibility when it comes to exploiting the ill. >:(
  • fitnessqueenfitnessqueen Posts: 5,185
    Forum Member
    I don't know why someone with severe issues as her was allowed onto Big Brother

    Well they did let Lauren Harries and Sophie Anderton on the last one ....
  • DiamondDollDiamondDoll Posts: 21,460
    Forum Member
    ✭✭✭
    Well they did let Lauren Harries and Sophie Anderton on the last one ....


    ......and Linda Nolan on this one.
  • SquatchSquatch Posts: 781
    Forum Member
    ✭✭
    Bellagio wrote: »
    And finally, her scrawny arse is out the door...

    You wouldn't say the opposite about a fat woman. Misogyny at it's finest.
  • vampyrevampyre Posts: 613
    Forum Member
    ✭✭
    Bellagio wrote: »
    And finally, her scrawny arse is out the door...
    Squatch wrote: »
    You wouldn't say the opposite about a fat woman. Misogyny at it's finest.

    He would. It's what he does.:D
  • flowerpowaflowerpowa Posts: 24,386
    Forum Member
    ✭✭✭
    Bellagio wrote: »
    And finally, her scrawny arse is out the door...

    For her age, Liz's arse looks in pretty good shape, her legs look good too.
  • vampyrevampyre Posts: 613
    Forum Member
    ✭✭
    flowerpowa wrote: »
    For her age, Liz's arse looks in pretty good shape, her legs look good too.

    If you read tomorrow's diary you'll find her bottom though small has collapsed like melted Vienetta.
    Don't say you weren't warned :kitty:
  • newbabynewbaby Posts: 824
    Forum Member
    ✭✭
    vampyre wrote: »
    If you read tomorrow's diary you'll find her bottom though small has collapsed like melted Vienetta.
    Don't say you weren't warned :kitty:

    The Vienetta-bottom finds its way into the article (?)(nonsense, more like) she wasn't going to write about her time in "that place". Vienetta is the new £26,000.
  • Molly BloomMolly Bloom Posts: 2,318
    Forum Member
    ✭✭✭
    So she said she wasn't going to write about BB but she's written about BB? What a shocker! I never saw that coming.
  • jazzyjazzyjazzyjazzy Posts: 4,865
    Forum Member
    ✭✭✭
    Lots of untruths in there are usual - Liz Jones usual rubbish.
  • flowerpowaflowerpowa Posts: 24,386
    Forum Member
    ✭✭✭
    I thought Liz summed up the self obsessed celebs pretty accurately.
  • lea_uklea_uk Posts: 9,637
    Forum Member
    flowerpowa wrote: »
    I thought Liz summed up the self obsessed celebs pretty accurately.

    Funny how he didn't say anything to them in the house.
  • Molly BloomMolly Bloom Posts: 2,318
    Forum Member
    ✭✭✭
    lea_uk wrote: »
    Funny how he didn't say anything to them in the house.

    Liz Jones... a true keyboard warrior until her last breath.

    (That's NOT a compliment)
  • FatsiaFatsia Posts: 1,187
    Forum Member
    ✭✭✭
    And again it's crammed full of little 'f*** you' bombs about how she was really kind and didn't tell the world about Linda self-harming and somebody else taking pills and alcohol. Oh except now she is. And of course this is the article she definitely wasn't going to write. Oh except now she is. And again she says she's learned something and she's going to be kind now. Oh except look, she isn't.
    Loathsome hack.
  • cathrincathrin Posts: 4,968
    Forum Member
    ✭✭✭
    She really is getting her moneysworth out of the "bottom like Vienetta" line, isn't she? She used it (1) on the show, (2) in her Diary column this week, *and* (3) in the BB article in the main paper.

    Oh, and speaking of endlessly recycling the same boring twaddle, this week's Diary started with Liz asking DS why he's with her now when he wasn't interested in her 30 years ago! That question has made more appearances than the Vienetta in the past few weeks!

    This week's top contender for the Line Of Dialogue Least Likely To Emerge From The Lips Of A Grown Man Award: "I want to go and make a cup of tea, but I don't want to leave you." Almost as good as last week's: "I am happy when I'm with you. I am glowing." (First rule of writing dialogue, Liz: always try reading it out loud to see if it sounds right. "I am glowing?" "I am happy?" Robots talk like this! Daleks, maybe! Characters in 19th-century novels! Real people don't say "I am", they say "I'm"!)

    Seabird made an excellent point about the "bathtub scene" which is being hailed by Liz's fans as some sort of moment of comedy gold. As Seabird rightly says, all the things Liz pulled out of the hat to create a quick moment of by-numbers misery ....they're the exact same things she draws on over and over again in her columns to create the exact same result. How are people supposed to feel genuine sympathy the next time she starts bleating about the deceased cat etc, having seen her use this (and the other, much more serious things) for such a flippant purpose?

    It will be interesting to see if her fellow housemates challenge her version of the various incidents she's recounted in her article. We all know how she likes to rewrite history and retell the same story with slightly different details....but for once she can be absolutely 100% proven wrong if she does this, because it's all on film! (Note how she subtly tweaked the details of the Jasmine suicide comment. In her account in the paper, she said Jasmine "rounded on her in tears" (am I right in thinking this didn't actually happen? IIRC, Jasmine went away and spoke to the other HMs about it; there was no confrontation) and she edited out the fact that she'd said Jasmine made her want to kill herself. As I understood it, that, specifically, was what upset Jasmine, not the way Liz told it.)
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 125
    Forum Member
    cathrin wrote: »
    She really is getting her moneysworth out of the "bottom like Vienetta" line, isn't she? She used it (1) on the show, (2) in her Diary column this week, *and* (3) in the BB article in the main paper.

    Oh, and speaking of endlessly recycling the same boring twaddle, this week's Diary started with Liz asking DS why he's with her now when he wasn't interested in her 30 years ago! That question has made more appearances than the Vienetta in the past few weeks!

    This week's top contender for the Line Of Dialogue Least Likely To Emerge From The Lips Of A Grown Man Award: "I want to go and make a cup of tea, but I don't want to leave you." Almost as good as last week's: "I am happy when I'm with you. I am glowing." (First rule of writing dialogue, Liz: always try reading it out loud to see if it sounds right. "I am glowing?" "I am happy?" Robots talk like this! Daleks, maybe! Characters in 19th-century novels! Real people don't say "I am", they say "I'm"!)

    Seabird made an excellent point about the "bathtub scene" which is being hailed by Liz's fans as some sort of moment of comedy gold. As Seabird rightly says, all the things Liz pulled out of the hat to create a quick moment of by-numbers misery ....they're the exact same things she draws on over and over again in her columns to create the exact same result. How are people supposed to feel genuine sympathy the next time she starts bleating about the deceased cat etc, having seen her use this (and the other, much more serious things) for such a flippant purpose?

    It will be interesting to see if her fellow housemates challenge her version of the various incidents she's recounted in her article. We all know how she likes to rewrite history and retell the same story with slightly different details....but for once she can be absolutely 100% proven wrong if she does this, because it's all on film! (Note how she subtly tweaked the details of the Jasmine suicide comment. In her account in the paper, she said Jasmine "rounded on her in tears" (am I right in thinking this didn't actually happen? IIRC, Jasmine went away and spoke to the other HMs about it; there was no confrontation) and she edited out the fact that she'd said Jasmine made her want to kill herself. As I understood it, that, specifically, was what upset Jasmine, not the way Liz told it.)

    Aha Cathrin! Let me draw aside the mysterious veil of mystery regarding Jonesey's appalling dialogue! It's all about word-count. "I am" counts as two whilst "I'm" only counts as one! When you're a paid-by-the-word hack like her, it's very much a case of "never mind the quality, feel the width!". Oh, and regarding her use of suicide terminology as a basis for humour... well... let's just hope she rots in Hell, eh?
Sign In or Register to comment.