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Flatmate keeps leaving bathroom really messy
bbclassics
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This is probably gonna sound stupid and trivial but I just wanna say if you put yourself in my shoes/were in the same situation as me you'd probably understand how irritating/gross it is.
Basically my male flatmate keeps leaving lots of short hairs (pubes) in the bathroom, and they are like everywhere. It's ridiculous in the bath,tiles,floor even in the sink *insert vomit smiley. It's not mine (I have light hair), the hairs are dark black and he has jet black hair. I didn't really wanna discuss it with him cus it's an awkward situation/problem so I left a note saying please rinse short hairs down the drain. He flipped out when he read the note and said it was stupid etc and that he'd like to shove the note where the sun don't shine (charming). So I discussed it with him (not that he listened much) and he said he'd clean up after himself, but he hasn't.
This is kinda gross, people have to share the bathroom. I shave and make sure the hairs get rinsed down the plughole, and I don't know why he can't do the same? He's a grown man (30 yrs old) and he leaves the bathroom in a state.
I feel like going with some cruel tactic to embarrass him now so he gets his act together. I don't really wanna knock on his door and have to (cringeworthingly) discuss it again, I don't know what to do?
Basically my male flatmate keeps leaving lots of short hairs (pubes) in the bathroom, and they are like everywhere. It's ridiculous in the bath,tiles,floor even in the sink *insert vomit smiley. It's not mine (I have light hair), the hairs are dark black and he has jet black hair. I didn't really wanna discuss it with him cus it's an awkward situation/problem so I left a note saying please rinse short hairs down the drain. He flipped out when he read the note and said it was stupid etc and that he'd like to shove the note where the sun don't shine (charming). So I discussed it with him (not that he listened much) and he said he'd clean up after himself, but he hasn't.
This is kinda gross, people have to share the bathroom. I shave and make sure the hairs get rinsed down the plughole, and I don't know why he can't do the same? He's a grown man (30 yrs old) and he leaves the bathroom in a state.
I feel like going with some cruel tactic to embarrass him now so he gets his act together. I don't really wanna knock on his door and have to (cringeworthingly) discuss it again, I don't know what to do?
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Everything from "borrowing" food/items, no washing up dishes, leaving a mess and just being down right selfish.
I actually miss those days, sort of.
If your house mate cannot be reasonable then it's time for him to go. If that's not an option then you should go. Not sure what else to suggest but good luck OP.
BTW, leaving notes is not good. It will always lead to issues. Going forward just talk to him.
I don't like confrontation but some times you just have to do it.
I won't miss flat shares when I'm done! lol
I don't feel like I should have to go/move out, I was here first and planned to live with my friend (which I do). There were one or 2 spare rooms left so the landlord ( a week or so) moved this guy/stranger in to our house, it's very hard to get 2 bedroom houses
In our house the bathroom is mine, my flatmate has the kitchen. So although he wouldn't dream of rinsing the tub when he has shaved and showered (which means me having to clean up after him before I can take my own shower each morning), he will wipe down the stove when he has finished cooking. Whenever his mess in the bathroom gets to me, I just remember I haven't had to clean an oven in 10 years and I am instantly calm
If that doesn't/won't work, then live with it as best you can and keep a pack of disposable cleaning wipes in a prominent place in the bathroom.
That reminds me the oven needs cleaning, nobody in the house is going to want to do it.
I've taken to rinsing my items (shower gel, shampoo) etc before I get my hands on them as his hairs sometimes go on them. Why couldn't he take the time to rinse his hairs off my stuff? It's downright selfish. If it were the other way around I would be thoroughly embarrrased, he just doesn't seem to care >:(
Are you sure they aren't chest hairs rather than pubes? My husband leaves little pube-like hairs in the bed and stuff sometimes, but I know (hope) they come from his chest and not 'downstairs'.
Anyway, gather them up and put them in a little pouch and say, "Hey, you dropped these." Maybe he'll get the message...
Don't leave notes. Have an actual conversation x
More like a gorilla
I have talked to him once before about this and he said he'd 'take the comments on board' but obviously he hasn't in fact it seems worse than ever.
I'll talk to him again - it's just slightly uncomfortable having to discuss his downstairs hair, not something I particularly want to think about tbh.
Do you and your friend have any house rules? Anything like.... "Make sure you replace the milk before you use the last of it" and "The bin bag goes out when it's full, not when the kitchen floor's full" sort of thing? If not, it might be time to start, seeing as you've had a stranger join your perfectly-fine twosome. Let the dust settle a bit about the bathroom issue, and then in a couple of weeks just sit the pair of them down and make up a list of "Do and don't" things - just as if you were planning a house share together from the off.
We don't really have official house rules cus my mate and I thought it seemed a bit strict, maybe we should have them. I used to get on with him okay. Maybe the weed he smokes makes him paranoid/wound up. I hate talking to him about the bathroom problems as it feels like I'm talking to a brick wall
She used to get £500 a week! Pocket money and damn right i was jealous lol. So after we had a big bust up after i complainted for the last ime, i thought enough is enough and was ready to leave.
She has a wild parties ever Thursday, Friday and Saturday night, to be honest they didn really annoy me as her friends tidied up their mess before they left. This one night she met a group of Ozzie football players who were in Aberdeen for a week, she decided to bring them back to ours for a party.
During the party she intorduced me as "Her annyoing virgin housemate whos worse than her granny"
The lads could tell i was embarrassed and sort of give me a wink as in "Leave her to us"
Anyway, after she had slept with 2 of the guys, she fell asleep completly pissed. One of the lads completely covered her head in Nair/Veet, and they left.
Que me laughing hysterically when she same out of her bedroom the next morning looking like Hulk Hogan.
Wee story for you while im on my lunch lol
She sounds like a nightmare.
The pube thing really annoys me but he's a pain in other ways, like he'll leave moudly food in his cupboards but will have a go at me for me leaving a plate(for only 20mins or so) on the side/surface of the kitchen. He also has left raw uncovered meat in the freezer amongst everyone's food and let's mould/fungi grow in his appliances and fridge shelf.
He'll yell about cleaning the house and 'getting food poisoning from my plates/kitchen side' yet he leaves rotting food in the kitchen.
Honestly can't wait to get away from him. I know other people in the house dislike his ways (but never say anything to him about it) so if anyone should leave really it should be him.
My tenancy ends in a few months so fairly soon I'm outta the house and away from him.
With me, the shoe is kind of on the other foot. I'm an untidy person. I'm the first to admit it. Two months ago I moved in wth a guy who is, by his own admission, borderline OCD. I do like living here, and I am trying to make a conscious effort to clean up after myself (I feel like I've never done so much washing up in my life - A sentence I know sounds ridiculous but I haven't exactly come from a house proud childhood so this kind of stuff hasn't been drilled into me like many other people) but it doesn't seen to be enough. It's starting to create bad feeling in the house - he is ridiculously tidy and within the next couple of months, we will have his best friend and his boyfriend moving in as well. I know I need to get my act together and do more stuff around the house, stuff to be honest I wouldn't consider doing normally (washing cupboards, dusting, that sort of thing) so is there any advice anybody has to help me get into more of a routine? At least I don't leave my pubes everywhere
Make his problem he's making for you his problem again. Actions speak louder than words and he needs to understand his actions have consequences for him if he causes them to become problematic for you.
It's a compromise, when you're in that situation. Neither of you should have the final say, yet both of you should respect the other.
To help you respect his wishes, I'd suggest you ask him what he thinks needs doing on a weekly and monthly basis, then do a rota (eg wash cupboards doors monthly on a Sunday or a day that suits you, and who is to do it). If he has a go before that time then you point to the rota and say it's not due to be done yet, and not to worry, you'll do it when it's time.
If you start out by saying you understand he needs things tidy so you want to help, it won't sting (hopefully) when you ask him to ease back a little.
To help him respect you in return, I'd suggest you ask him to ease up on the smaller things, such as putting a cushion straight every time you get up from the settee (I've had that situation when I was a child) or whatever he does.
Dusting is a bugger, though. One shaft of sunlight shows up all the dust, and it's awful to see. You can minimise the task by not having much clutter and ornaments, so a quick wipe and it's done. I'm sure you can get products that allegedly minimise dust, but I don't use them so I don't know how effective they are. Anyway, once you realise you need to do dusting X times a week, then put it into the rota and keep to it. Maybe that's something he can do if he notices it more than you do.
But being brought up in a houseproud house isn't how people learn, necessarily. A friend of mine was brought up in a completely messy house and turned out to be a manic cleaner of her own, whereas I was brought up in an overly-clean house and rebelled the other way. I'm not proud of that, but I have felt there's more to life than worrying if the cupboard where I keep my tinned goods has a mark inside or not.
Thanks for your advice
I have already talked to him about it.
He kept trying to change the subject and started ranting about how people need to clean the kitchen/surfaces etc.
I'm thinking of sweeping up the hairs and leaving the dustpan outside his bedroom door.