Name change after wedding.

ppaupyppaupy Posts: 2,729
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I am getting married in 6 weeks and will be adding on my partners surname to mine...we both have the same first name so cant just use his.

I dont know weather to hypen it onto mine or just add without..does anyone know if it makes any difference?

Have tried googling it but it wasnt very helpful.
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Comments

  • RorschachRorschach Posts: 10,818
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    It makes no legal difference at all, but as a hyphen is seen as "the norm" then if you don't have one be prepared for misunderstanding after misunderstanding.

    For example if you verbally give your name to someone as "Mr Fitzpatrick Smith" then 99% of people are likely to write it down as "Fitzpatrick-Smith". Not a huge problem most of the time of course, but it might annoy you. You may get fed up of always saying "...no hyphen".

    Alternatively if you write down John Fitzpatrick Smith on a form or information card then 99% of people are likely to assume that Fitzpatrick is a middle name and put you down officially as Mr Smith. Again perhaps not life threatening but possibly annoying.

    So by all means have the two names seperate, it's entirely your choice, but be prepared for a married life full of being annoyed and always having to explain yourself (otherwise known as married life :p).
  • FlannoFlanno Posts: 1,427
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    Adding your 1st name & surname with your partner's surname i.e. Mr James Abbott Byers may be easy.

    How about your partner adding his 1st name & surname with your surname in a different way like this: Mr James Byers Abbott?

    Or you could add your 2nd name such as Mr James Frank Byers to prevent confusion? Hope your partner doesn't have the same 2nd name as well! :D
  • ppaupyppaupy Posts: 2,729
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    Rorschach wrote: »
    It makes no legal difference at all, but as a hyphen is seen as "the norm" then if you don't have one be prepared for misunderstanding after misunderstanding.

    For example if you verbally give your name to someone as "Mr Fitzpatrick Smith" then 99% of people are likely to write it down as "Fitzpatrick-Smith". Not a huge problem most of the time of course, but it might annoy you. You may get fed up of always saying "...no hyphen".

    Alternatively if you write down John Fitzpatrick Smith on a form or information card then 99% of people are likely to assume that Fitzpatrick is a middle name and put you down officially as Mr Smith. Again perhaps not life threatening but possibly annoying.

    So by all means have the two names seperate, it's entirely your choice, but be prepared for a married life full of being annoyed and always having to explain yourself (otherwise known as married life :p).
    Flanno wrote: »
    Adding your 1st name & surname with your partner's surname i.e. Mr James Abbott Byers may be easy.

    How about your partner adding his 1st name & surname with your surname in a different way like this: Mr James Byers Abbott?

    Or you could add your 2nd name such as Mr James Frank Byers to prevent confusion? Hope your partner doesn't have the same 2nd name as well! :D


    We did think about him adding mine to his somehow..but he has 3 children and I didnt really like him having a different name to them..also for his work would look odd.

    I guess after reading the comments I will hypen his onto mine,seems the easiest solution...or one of us change our first name...lol.
  • smudges dadsmudges dad Posts: 36,989
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    Why do you need to change your name anyway? Are you losing your identity and becoming someone elses property? I didn't want my wife to change her name and I'm quite often called by her surname in town.
  • ppaupyppaupy Posts: 2,729
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    Why do you need to change your name anyway? Are you losing your identity and becoming someone elses property? I didn't want my wife to change her name and I'm quite often called by her surname in town.

    LOL..I wont be "losing me" in any of this..Its my choice to want to take on his name...we will be a family and as such I think that means we have the same name.

    For many reasons I dont feel an attachement to my surname,so would have just stopped using it,but as said in OP we share the same first name.
  • towerstowers Posts: 12,183
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    Why do you need to change your name anyway? Are you losing your identity and becoming someone elses property? I didn't want my wife to change her name and I'm quite often called by her surname in town.

    What surname do your children have, if you have any?

    Kids would end up with generations worth of surnames if one partner's name wasn't given priority over the other.

    They'd have to stop taking their parents names altogether to make it fair - invent their own surnames.
  • DerekPAgainDerekPAgain Posts: 2,708
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    Why don't you start using your middle name as your Christian name?

    Along the line of Joe B. Bloggs becomes J. Bill Bloggs who then marries Joe Smith to become J. Bill Smith
  • ppaupyppaupy Posts: 2,729
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    Why don't you start using your middle name as your Christian name?

    Along the line of Joe B. Bloggs becomes J. Bill Bloggs who then marries Joe Smith to become J. Bill Smith

    That was one thought...But that would be far more confusing for everyone including me!lol

    And I like my first name more than my second name.
  • queseraseraqueserasera Posts: 2,999
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    Am I write in thinking this is actually a civil partnership and not a marriage in the traditional sense ie male - female
  • Tt88Tt88 Posts: 6,827
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    Does the first surname name sound like a christian name too? If it does then i would hypenate so people dont think thats a middle name.

    Although i think id hyphenate anyway since it seems most double barrelled names are.
  • davidmcndavidmcn Posts: 12,086
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    ppaupy wrote: »
    I am getting married in 6 weeks and will be adding on my partners surname to mine...we both have the same first name so cant just use his.
    ppaupy wrote: »
    we will be a family and as such I think that means we have the same name.

    I'm confused - are you saying that you already have the same first name, and want to change your names to the same hyphenated name? Isn't this likely to cause even more confusion than just keeping your current name?
  • Tt88Tt88 Posts: 6,827
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    davidmcn wrote: »
    I'm confused - are you saying that you already have the same first name, and want to change your names to the same hyphenated name? Isn't this likely to cause even more confusion than just keeping your current name?

    I think its more like paul smith marrying paul jones.

    Paul smith already has kids that are smiths so wants to stay smith.

    Paul jones wants to take his partners name but two paul smiths would be confusing therefore hes debating paul jones-smith or paul smith-jones and whether to have the hyphen.
  • davidmcndavidmcn Posts: 12,086
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    Tt88 wrote: »
    I think its more like paul smith marrying paul jones.

    Paul smith already has kids that are smiths so wants to stay smith.

    Paul jones wants to take his partners name but two paul smiths would be confusing therefore hes debating paul jones-smith or paul smith-jones and whether to have the hyphen.

    That's what I initially thought from the OP, but only one of them having the hyphenated name still wouldn't be "having the same name".
  • Tt88Tt88 Posts: 6,827
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    davidmcn wrote: »
    That's what I initially thought from the OP, but only one of them having the hyphenated name still wouldn't be "having the same name".

    I think the op meant he wants to incorporate the partners name in his so they do have partly the same name. If he changed his completely to the partners it would cause havoc with mail etc.

    If he didnt change it at all there would be no visible sign of marriage (except the rings) which is important to some people when they get married, especially if they like the traditional aspect.
  • ppaupyppaupy Posts: 2,729
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    Am I write in thinking this is actually a civil partnership and not a marriage in the traditional sense ie male - female

    Yes you are right...male male.
  • ppaupyppaupy Posts: 2,729
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    davidmcn wrote: »
    I'm confused - are you saying that you already have the same first name, and want to change your names to the same hyphenated name? Isn't this likely to cause even more confusion than just keeping your current name?

    No because I will be ++++++ ++++-+++++
    he will be. ++++++ +++++

    His name wont change. I will just be adding his surname to mine.
  • ppaupyppaupy Posts: 2,729
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    davidmcn wrote: »
    That's what I initially thought from the OP, but only one of them having the hyphenated name still wouldn't be "having the same name".

    It will be the nearest compromise we can think of without changing one of our first names.
  • ppaupyppaupy Posts: 2,729
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    Tt88 wrote: »
    I think the op meant he wants to incorporate the partners name in his so they do have partly the same name. If he changed his completely to the partners it would cause havoc with mail etc.

    If he didnt change it at all there would be no visible sign of marriage (except the rings) which is important to some people when they get married, especially if they like the traditional aspect.

    Thank you...thats exactly the thinking and reason we are doing it.:D
  • Tt88Tt88 Posts: 6,827
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    ppaupy wrote: »
    No because I will be ++++++ ++++-+++++
    he will be. ++++++ +++++

    His name wont change. I will just be adding his surname to mine.

    I always imagined your name was paul for some reason :(

    I could have got a smith or jones right though :D
  • ppaupyppaupy Posts: 2,729
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    Tt88 wrote: »
    I always imagined your name was paul for some reason :(

    I could have got a smith or jones right though :D

    LOL mine and his name is Paul!!
  • queseraseraqueserasera Posts: 2,999
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    ppaupy wrote: »
    Yes you are right...male male.

    OK thanks - it was just that you said you both had the same first name and that seemed the most logical explanation
  • ppaupyppaupy Posts: 2,729
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    OK thanks - it was just that you said you both had the same first name and that seemed the most logical explanation

    lol indeed.:D
  • ppaupyppaupy Posts: 2,729
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    OK thanks - it was just that you said you both had the same first name and that seemed the most logical explanation[/QUOT

    deleted...double post.
  • smudges dadsmudges dad Posts: 36,989
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    towers wrote: »
    What surname do your children have, if you have any?

    Kids would end up with generations worth of surnames if one partner's name wasn't given priority over the other.

    They'd have to stop taking their parents names altogether to make it fair - invent their own surnames.
    Iceland has the best surname convention. A male would take son and a female dottir. E.g. Magnus Magnusson or Björk Guðmundsdóttir. Sally Magnusson ruins the system. Their phonebook is in Christian name order.

    No children, just cats and hens
    OK thanks - it was just that you said you both had the same first name and that seemed the most logical explanation

    I'd assumed something like Lesley / Leslie or Gwyn / Gwynne
  • queseraseraqueserasera Posts: 2,999
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    I'd assumed something like Lesley / Leslie or Gwyn / Gwynne

    Yes but they are not the same names, and it wouldn't be a problem if it was a male - female thing. I had first thought that but to give the full account i then looked at the OPs profile where he said he was male. In his post he had referred to his parftner as male. Now knowing people sometimes make spelling mistakes I didn't want to jump to conclusions :)
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