According to local sources, she's been seen on horseback around the lanes, but always being led. One of her neighbours said something like "she couldn't ride a rocking horse".
According to local sources, she's been seen on horseback around the lanes, but always being led. One of her neighbours said something like "she couldn't ride a rocking horse".
this is the only time I've read about Lizard riding Lizzie (and for good measure, a cruel cliffhanger re: Michael who lived to see another day)
Anyone notice that Nic's horse has changed his name in that? Or does she have more than one? Does Liz pay all the bills for both (presumably not otherwise she'd have mentioned it) and if not, how did she decide which one to pay for?
The story of the horses running the dog over is soooo ridiculous. She says that she didn't hear them coming cos she's deaf - is the dog also deaf? The dog would be more than capable of avoiding the horses - it wouldn't rush towards her for safety (that's just another Liz fantasy) - and the horses wouldn't deliberately run the dog down (horses attempt to avoid anything that may cause them to fall). Plus, the dog is a collie - bred for many, many generations to herd cattle and sheep - it would easily skip out of the way (and probably end up behind them chivvying them along).
As for ex-racehorses being difficult to ride - I used to ride an ex steeplechaser back in the 80s when I was a teenager and a couple of friends have owned ex-racehorses and used them for horse-trials (low level eventing). I don't know what Lizzie's story is but many horses are bred to race but either never do or only race once before it is decided that they aren't good enough and then get sold on - they get used for showing, horse trials/eventing, hunting or just hacking out. They aren't that unusual. The footballer Michael Owen's wife runs a charity to rehome retired racehorses and I understand she's very successful. I don't believe Liz can ride (beyond sitting on a horse that just follows the one in front) and I also think she is far too nervous to ride anything more challenging than a 25 year old riding school hack.
The second is genuinely one of the most pointless pieces of writing I've ever come across in my life. There's no substance to it, it's not funny, and she just comes across as a complete tit.
The second is genuinely one of the most pointless pieces of writing I've ever come across in my life. There's no substance to it, it's not funny, and she just comes across as a complete tit.
Agreed. I just read this in the paper..and once again wonder why I bother to read anything LJ writes. Pointless, random rantings from a brainless twerp. I really do wonder what planet she is on. Between her bizarre rants and her imaginary boyfriend its hard to know whether she is just an eejit or really quite worryingly delusional. Maybe she is hoping Hollywood will pick up her diaries a la Bridget Jones . I think Jack Nicolson should play Liz.
Agreed. I just read this in the paper..and once again wonder why I bother to read anything LJ writes. Pointless, random rantings from a brainless twerp. I really do wonder what planet she is on. Between her bizarre rants and her imaginary boyfriend its hard to know whether she is just an eejit or really quite worryingly delusional. Maybe she is hoping Hollywood will pick up her diaries a la Bridget Jones . I think Jack Nicolson should play Liz.
Genius! :D:D
I still think she's a troll. Either that or mentally ill!
Or she'll be trying to pack up and move because her house has a buyer, but Smirky or some other cat comes down with a tummy disorder and can't be moved, because, well, really, the very thought of moving Smirky when he's got a tummy bug! How inhumane! (Or how inanimalane!) She also realizes that she can't bear to leave, because the place is haunted by one of the cats who died there, the only being in the universe who has ever truly loved her, whose death was a devastating trauma she never got over. How can the fates be so against her?? How can a cat come to the end of its natural life and then go and DIE when you NEED it???
A cat called Smirky - brilliant, this made me laugh out loud. Bet Liz wishes she'd thought of this name herself. Have to confess to reading her 'diary' if only to see what rubbish is she's spouting. I'd love to know who the RS is supposed to be, is he coming back on the scene now?
Here we go again - another dose of complete and utter drivel. Honestly, you couldn't make it up but of course she can!
Maybe she's wearing trackie bottoms in that photo because she's temporarily skint again.
What's the FRS told her off the record?
(a) He's discovered he's gay and has married another man.
(b) He's gone back to his 'Eurotrash' girlfriend and has
married her.
(c) He's come to his senses and has told her he thinks she's
completely bonkers.
Answers on a plain postcard to the Daily Wail in order to win a copy of her latest book when it eventually comes out. :D:D
Why is she wearing Adidas tracksuit bottoms? Not very fashion forward. :rolleyes:
And what is the second article about? Families? Holidays in the UK? Randomly and disrespectfully mentioning Auschwitz?
Yes, very odd. She hops about from one topic to another, dropping her bit about Auschwitz at the end of a lot of meaningless drivel. She can't call two parents and their children a family because nobody refers to her animals as a family? She can't take her collie "husband" to a holiday cottage? She can't get wi-fi in said cottage? All this from a woman of over 50 who still calls her horses' feet paws. She really has no idea of the lives of normal people. Who is she to criticise the feelings of a father seeing a pair of shoes in his daughter's size? Every visitor to Auschwitz will have their own personal reaction; she is in no position to condemn one man's on the basis of her childlessness.
And I too am childless and have animals, by the way. My horse has hooves, only the dog and cat have paws.
Is she physically incapable of writing the word "wife" without prefacing it with "passive-aggressve"? Why is she so obsessed with this twisted view of marriage: the henpecked husband, downtrodden by his bullying passive-aggressive wife, forced to spend time with his dreadful children while secretly simmering with resentment and dreaming of escape?
As she deliberately didn't say who was calling her I'm betting the 'off the record' phone call was not from the fictional rock star but most probably the ex-husband or South American Married Man - or she's making up yet another fictional admirer, we are certainly due for one. Does she really think that anyone would be interested in a new book from her? What will she write about? Unless she and the FRS are going to go public no one is interested in hearing about the ex husband and the world's most neglected animals anymore. As most people only read her columns now for the readers' comments that casual interest would not transfer to buying her book.
As she deliberately didn't say who was calling her I'm betting the 'off the record' phone call was not from the fictional rock star but most probably the ex-husband or South American Married Man - or she's making up yet another fictional admirer, we are certainly due for one. Does she really think that anyone would be interested in a new book from her? What will she write about? Unless she and the FRS are going to go public no one is interested in hearing about the ex husband and the world's most neglected animals anymore. As most people only read her columns now for the readers' comments that casual interest would not transfer to buying her book.
Perhaps she realises this and her new book is a compliation of all the best comments from the past year or so? It'd require hardly any work from her, be amusing and more coherant than anything she can write and probably sell better.
Perhaps she realises this and her new book is a compliation of all the best comments from the past year or so? It'd require hardly any work from her, be amusing and more coherant than anything she can write and probably sell better.
Actually it would be a good idea, but Liz should address the comments and say why we have got her so very wrong. We know she reads them, she wouldn't be able to help herself, so it would be be a perfect opportunity to set the record straight. Unfortunately it would actually just feature the dwindling handful of comments from her supporters. "We luv you Lizzie, you luv animals, you are just LIke Carrie, leave her alone you wotten lot!". Do they actually realise she is 53 and not 13?
Yes, very odd. She hops about from one topic to another, dropping her bit about Auschwitz at the end of a lot of meaningless drivel. She can't call two parents and their children a family because nobody refers to her animals as a family? She can't take her collie "husband" to a holiday cottage? She can't get wi-fi in said cottage? All this from a woman of over 50 who still calls her horses' feet paws. She really has no idea of the lives of normal people. Who is she to criticise the feelings of a father seeing a pair of shoes in his daughter's size? Every visitor to Auschwitz will have their own personal reaction; she is in no position to condemn one man's on the basis of her childlessness.
And I too am childless and have animals, by the way. My horse has hooves, only the dog and cat have paws.
I find the comments about the collie daughters, collie husband and turkey nephew rather freaky. Plenty of people refer to their pets as 'their babies' but to actually assign them different relationships......?
Like Pauline I'm single, childless but have animals and my horses have never had paws.
And talking of horses and their paws what is that ridiculous story about Lizzie getting kicked all about. She starts off saying that Lizzie must have really been in pain cos she wouldn't let anyone near her - is the the same Lizzie that bites everyone (especially Liz) and needed sedating for the vet to poultice her latest injury (abscess in her hoof)? Apparently we are expected to believe that Benji has kicked Lizzie over a dispute over some hay. We've heard endlessly about how Liz's horses go 'barefoot' and she even had some person come and teach her how to get them barefoot (take their shoes off?!) so how has he manged to slice a piece off skin off her forehead. I like the comment about the vet finding no evidence of fracture or brain injury - she presumably came equipped with an X-ray machine and brain scanner did she? Also, he's far more likely to have bitten her rather than kicked her (it's what horses tend to do). Not sure why a blind horse with a poulticed foot is roaming around loose anyway.
Flitting from one subject to the next, rather like Liz, why did she rent a cottage (that she couldn't take her collie husband to) because her horse had to go into hospital? You don't visit them! You box them up there and then box them back - I doubt that she was in more than a day anyway, it was only an examination. And if she wants a cottage that allows dogs then she should book one! Same goes for wi-fi - she should take a look at the ads in the Mail on Sunday where there are plenty of dog friendly holidays/holiday companies advertised.
I know the RS is fictional but does she seriously expect us to believe that he has just rung her and started chatting away as though nothing has happened? Three or four weeks ago he told her that he didn't want her coming out to Australia cos she'd printed his e-mails. She then wailed on about how she had ruined every thing and then discovered that he was shagging someone else. Now he's supposedly ringing up behaving as though he is still her boyfriend and just spoke to her a day or so ago rather than nearly a month ago.
I've noticed that her comments are reducing so maybe her days are numbered. Perhaps that's who was on the phone - the editor telling her that she's sacked.:D
"Surely, women like me have to be deluded to wax ourselves so that we resemble an adolescent: Madonna is both victim and perpetrator, as am I.
Just as anorexia assaults the most susceptible young women, the ones with low self-esteem who do not live in a bubble of love and family support, a desire to look young assaults those of us who feel we are not ready to grow old.
I’m a case in point. I don’t have a stable, loving relationship, I don’t have children, I am not where I want to be in my career, and so I feel my body is racing ahead of me. I need more time."
Comments
this is the only time I've read about Lizard riding Lizzie (and for good measure, a cruel cliffhanger re: Michael who lived to see another day)
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/home/you/article-1278167/In-I-fail-prevent-disaster.html
Anyone notice that Nic's horse has changed his name in that? Or does she have more than one? Does Liz pay all the bills for both (presumably not otherwise she'd have mentioned it) and if not, how did she decide which one to pay for?
The story of the horses running the dog over is soooo ridiculous. She says that she didn't hear them coming cos she's deaf - is the dog also deaf? The dog would be more than capable of avoiding the horses - it wouldn't rush towards her for safety (that's just another Liz fantasy) - and the horses wouldn't deliberately run the dog down (horses attempt to avoid anything that may cause them to fall). Plus, the dog is a collie - bred for many, many generations to herd cattle and sheep - it would easily skip out of the way (and probably end up behind them chivvying them along).
As for ex-racehorses being difficult to ride - I used to ride an ex steeplechaser back in the 80s when I was a teenager and a couple of friends have owned ex-racehorses and used them for horse-trials (low level eventing). I don't know what Lizzie's story is but many horses are bred to race but either never do or only race once before it is decided that they aren't good enough and then get sold on - they get used for showing, horse trials/eventing, hunting or just hacking out. They aren't that unusual. The footballer Michael Owen's wife runs a charity to rehome retired racehorses and I understand she's very successful. I don't believe Liz can ride (beyond sitting on a horse that just follows the one in front) and I also think she is far too nervous to ride anything more challenging than a 25 year old riding school hack.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/home/you/article-2155840/Jessica-Lawlor--JUST-Wag-isn-t-enough.html
and one in which she makes random offensive comments, hates families, childrens and mothers, candlewick bedspreads and gets a dig at Kirstie Alsopp again.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/article-2156930/LIZ-JONES-Having-family-excuse-smug---failing-damp-dust-skirting-boards.html
Does she really refer to Lizzie's 'paw'? I thought Lizzie was a horse?! Or are all her animals now named after her?
In a world where a dog can be her husband, any flight of imagination is possible.
So a horse can have paws, just like LJ can have a rock star boyfriend.
The second is genuinely one of the most pointless pieces of writing I've ever come across in my life. There's no substance to it, it's not funny, and she just comes across as a complete tit.
This being the woman who claims she fed the rats on her farm because she's such a good person.
Agreed. I just read this in the paper..and once again wonder why I bother to read anything LJ writes. Pointless, random rantings from a brainless twerp. I really do wonder what planet she is on. Between her bizarre rants and her imaginary boyfriend its hard to know whether she is just an eejit or really quite worryingly delusional. Maybe she is hoping Hollywood will pick up her diaries a la Bridget Jones
Why is she wearing Adidas tracksuit bottoms? Not very fashion forward. :rolleyes:
And what is the second article about? Families? Holidays in the UK? Randomly and disrespectfully mentioning Auschwitz?
Genius!
I still think she's a troll. Either that or mentally ill!
I wondered that. Really bizarre.
A cat called Smirky - brilliant, this made me laugh out loud. Bet Liz wishes she'd thought of this name herself. Have to confess to reading her 'diary' if only to see what rubbish is she's spouting. I'd love to know who the RS is supposed to be, is he coming back on the scene now?
Maybe she's wearing trackie bottoms in that photo because she's temporarily skint again.
What's the FRS told her off the record?
(a) He's discovered he's gay and has married another man.
(b) He's gone back to his 'Eurotrash' girlfriend and has
married her.
(c) He's come to his senses and has told her he thinks she's
completely bonkers.
Answers on a plain postcard to the Daily Wail in order to win a copy of her latest book when it eventually comes out.
Yes, very odd. She hops about from one topic to another, dropping her bit about Auschwitz at the end of a lot of meaningless drivel. She can't call two parents and their children a family because nobody refers to her animals as a family? She can't take her collie "husband" to a holiday cottage? She can't get wi-fi in said cottage? All this from a woman of over 50 who still calls her horses' feet paws. She really has no idea of the lives of normal people. Who is she to criticise the feelings of a father seeing a pair of shoes in his daughter's size? Every visitor to Auschwitz will have their own personal reaction; she is in no position to condemn one man's on the basis of her childlessness.
And I too am childless and have animals, by the way. My horse has hooves, only the dog and cat have paws.
Actually it would be a good idea, but Liz should address the comments and say why we have got her so very wrong. We know she reads them, she wouldn't be able to help herself, so it would be be a perfect opportunity to set the record straight. Unfortunately it would actually just feature the dwindling handful of comments from her supporters. "We luv you Lizzie, you luv animals, you are just LIke Carrie, leave her alone you wotten lot!". Do they actually realise she is 53 and not 13?
I find the comments about the collie daughters, collie husband and turkey nephew rather freaky. Plenty of people refer to their pets as 'their babies' but to actually assign them different relationships......?
Like Pauline I'm single, childless but have animals and my horses have never had paws.
And talking of horses and their paws what is that ridiculous story about Lizzie getting kicked all about. She starts off saying that Lizzie must have really been in pain cos she wouldn't let anyone near her - is the the same Lizzie that bites everyone (especially Liz) and needed sedating for the vet to poultice her latest injury (abscess in her hoof)? Apparently we are expected to believe that Benji has kicked Lizzie over a dispute over some hay. We've heard endlessly about how Liz's horses go 'barefoot' and she even had some person come and teach her how to get them barefoot (take their shoes off?!) so how has he manged to slice a piece off skin off her forehead. I like the comment about the vet finding no evidence of fracture or brain injury - she presumably came equipped with an X-ray machine and brain scanner did she? Also, he's far more likely to have bitten her rather than kicked her (it's what horses tend to do). Not sure why a blind horse with a poulticed foot is roaming around loose anyway.
Flitting from one subject to the next, rather like Liz, why did she rent a cottage (that she couldn't take her collie husband to) because her horse had to go into hospital? You don't visit them! You box them up there and then box them back - I doubt that she was in more than a day anyway, it was only an examination. And if she wants a cottage that allows dogs then she should book one! Same goes for wi-fi - she should take a look at the ads in the Mail on Sunday where there are plenty of dog friendly holidays/holiday companies advertised.
I know the RS is fictional but does she seriously expect us to believe that he has just rung her and started chatting away as though nothing has happened? Three or four weeks ago he told her that he didn't want her coming out to Australia cos she'd printed his e-mails. She then wailed on about how she had ruined every thing and then discovered that he was shagging someone else. Now he's supposedly ringing up behaving as though he is still her boyfriend and just spoke to her a day or so ago rather than nearly a month ago.
I've noticed that her comments are reducing so maybe her days are numbered. Perhaps that's who was on the phone - the editor telling her that she's sacked.:D
the second piece recalls the asinine inanities of the 'Jones Moans' glory days
"Surely, women like me have to be deluded to wax ourselves so that we resemble an adolescent: Madonna is both victim and perpetrator, as am I.
Just as anorexia assaults the most susceptible young women, the ones with low self-esteem who do not live in a bubble of love and family support, a desire to look young assaults those of us who feel we are not ready to grow old.
I’m a case in point. I don’t have a stable, loving relationship, I don’t have children, I am not where I want to be in my career, and so I feel my body is racing ahead of me. I need more time."
:yawn: