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Anxiety - do you "get" it?
frisky python
Posts: 9,737 Forum Member
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Anxiety (and depression) comes up quite a bit on DS and I wondered how many on here "get" it.
My anxiety stops me doing certain things mainly travel related. For example, I could not face a 4hr journey on the M1 over the Xmas period so Mr Python took the mini pythons to see his family on his own whilst I stayed at home for 5 days on my own. I cried my eyes out when they left as have never been apart from the mini pythons before, but the alternative was a risk of my having a nervous breakdown during the journey and I didn't want my kids to see me like that. On a previous journey I felt like opening the car door to jump out the anxiety was that bad, obviously not a good idea at 70mph.
Some would suggest that I should face my fears and do it anyway. Believe me I have tried and it does not work for me at present. My family and friends don't understand and feel I should "pull myself together". I am on meds for it (Citalopram) have had 2 lots of counselling, 2 lots of CBT, hypnotherapy and it's only now I'm receiving long term psychotherapy that I finally feel I'm making progress. [The last lot of CBT the therapist said was pointless as I wasn't ready for it, hence the move to psychotherapy.]
So, do you have anxiety? What are your experiences - do you feel facing the fear helps? Do you feel people understand and are supportive, or dismissive? Does pressure from others help in any way to make you face the fear or does it make you worse?
My anxiety stops me doing certain things mainly travel related. For example, I could not face a 4hr journey on the M1 over the Xmas period so Mr Python took the mini pythons to see his family on his own whilst I stayed at home for 5 days on my own. I cried my eyes out when they left as have never been apart from the mini pythons before, but the alternative was a risk of my having a nervous breakdown during the journey and I didn't want my kids to see me like that. On a previous journey I felt like opening the car door to jump out the anxiety was that bad, obviously not a good idea at 70mph.
Some would suggest that I should face my fears and do it anyway. Believe me I have tried and it does not work for me at present. My family and friends don't understand and feel I should "pull myself together". I am on meds for it (Citalopram) have had 2 lots of counselling, 2 lots of CBT, hypnotherapy and it's only now I'm receiving long term psychotherapy that I finally feel I'm making progress. [The last lot of CBT the therapist said was pointless as I wasn't ready for it, hence the move to psychotherapy.]
So, do you have anxiety? What are your experiences - do you feel facing the fear helps? Do you feel people understand and are supportive, or dismissive? Does pressure from others help in any way to make you face the fear or does it make you worse?
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I definitely get it - but I'm ok at the moment. My anxiety shows itself differently to yours.
I'm sad that you spent 5 days alone over Christmas without the little 'uns. Couldn't his family have come to you instead?
I have problems in certain social situations. I'm ok if I can stay quiet, but if for any reason I have to be / am made to be the centre of attention in a group situation I clam up totally, struggle to get any words out, go bright red, and will literally drip with sweat.
But the cause of the anxiety is beyond my control so I work to control the attacks and I do succeed most times.
i've had days when i've refused to eat because of it
usually, when it happens, it's really extreme and over something stupid.
it happened to me last week on a forum i was on and 1 of the moderators their was really understanding (the same person who actually triggered it for me)
not much understanding in the real world though, as it were
when i get anxious, i tend to focus on what i'm anxious about until i get the result i'm looking for (i know it's bad, but coping methods fail me usually)
So very true. The pressure just builds up then. It's like telling someone with depression to "get over it" (I've had people tell me this before, but then I'd tell them to get f****d in retaliation).
The light headed feeling like I am actually going to pass out is horrible, frightening.
I also know that sitting around moaning about it or taking drugs to mask it won't solve anything. Get out, exercise, do whatever you need to give to give yourself confidence and you'll beat it. I haven't felt any anxiety for about 10 years
Thanks Faithy, will try to remember that
You're welcome it really works for me. Also gargling makes me burp which removes that "full up can't breathe uncomfy" feeling at the top of your stomach, throat.
You're welcome Maurice
Thanks for the tip
To be honest I thought everyone worried etc as much as me I didn't realise I was over anxious
The CBT wasn't pleasant and I didn't enjoy a lot if the things I was asked to do
But it's helped
It really did!
But the effort was worth it
Oh bugger, I've been resistant to considering it, am scared again now..... you have reassured me it was worth it though.
I suppose it's 'feel the fear and do it'.
This.
You said it better than I could.
Especially at work training events and group activities, I just want to listen and stay quiet.
I feel better that I am not the only one though.
I'm the same. I'm a bit weird but the worst things for me, when I get very nervous and tend to worry particularly, more than just in general social situations, like in group settings because I don't much like group settings, anyway otherwise the things I really tend to feel uncomfortable with are catered meetings, having to mill about around food with other members of staff around, everyone caught up in small talk and me often not really having anyone to talk to and then just the practicality of having to hold the plate and drink and what-not...even worse if its a sit down event, where do you sit etc.
Other than that, the other main situation that I feel particularly uncomfortable with, which is plain daft I know but all the same, its when I have to go to another office. The majority of the time I work in the one room/place and I swear I feel really rather nervous and uncomfortable when I have to nip through to another department or another office, which I have to do about a couple of times a week at least. Last time I was stood there, waiting for something to be done and I wasn't sure where to look or whatever. I felt like I was getting in the way and just wanted to be out of there. Feels like you've been sent to the headmasters office or something lol its so ridiculous. I don't know if thats specifically anxiety or what... I know what its like to be nervous and feel uncomfortable with things though, definitely.
It makes me worried that any medical professionals wouldn't believe I had anxiety and thus would assume I was blagging.
Indeed. Whilst doing my CBT for OCD, I became an alcoholic, self harmed and attempted suicide.
But I came out of the other end much better, and would recommend it to anyone.