What's the best fart you ever did have?

[Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 1,727
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For me, it would have to be walking home from the pub one day. I was by myself and let one go. It went on for ages and I felt like a new man afterwards. If only everything in life were that satisfying!
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  • Scotland1Scotland1 Posts: 1,634
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    For me, it would have to be walking home from the pub one day. I was by myself and let one go. It went on for ages and I felt like a new man afterwards. If only everything in life were that satisfying!

    I'm glad to say I have a little more decorum than to share such vulgar experiances online.

    <Sick>
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 1,727
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    Scotland1 wrote: »
    I'm glad to say I have a little more decorum than to share such vulgar experiances online.

    <Sick>
    But clearly not learning how to spell correctly!
  • HarryValleyHarryValley Posts: 16,433
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    For me, it would have to be walking home from the pub one day. I was by myself and let one go. It went on for ages and I felt like a new man afterwards. If only everything in life were that satisfying!
    Too many to choose from!
    I did once do one that sounded exactly like them 3-tone train horns tho :)
  • Lego PigLego Pig Posts: 2,279
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    Anything that warms me feet can be considered a triumph.
  • AchtungAchtung Posts: 10,480
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    It depends what I've eaten.

    I can remember doing really long ones as a teenager if I'd had mushy peas and thinking I was going to take off they were so violent.

    I don't seem to be so windy now that I'm older, not violently so anyway.
  • suki csuki c Posts: 6,088
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    Lego Pig wrote: »
    Anything that warms me feet can be considered a triumph.

    :D:D:D
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 272
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    I like the ones that vibrate and travel from back to front. I love a good fart. :)
  • Chuck InglishChuck Inglish Posts: 283
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    I did one that smelled like raw sewage when i was sitting at the back of the bus one night a few months ago

    I could tell the couple next to me were revolted by the putrid stench
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 10,649
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    I once let off a rasper whilst getting up from eating dinner at the table as a teenager. My whole family were in hysterics as it rumbled loudly for 2 or 3 seconds before ending in a bizarre high pitched squeak.


    Farts are universally funny-fact.
    Wet ones less so.
  • suki csuki c Posts: 6,088
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    It's a good un if it can lift the duvet :eek:
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 10,649
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    I remember Billy Connolly referring to a dinner party trouser trumpet causing a stony silence , which was only broken by someone asking
    "Who killed the dog":p
  • Bedsit BobBedsit Bob Posts: 24,344
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    I once took 6 egg butties to work for my lunch.

    That afternoon, I dropped my guts, and it was so bad :eek: a workmate had to vacate the office for 10 minutes. :p

    PS. I'm the opposite to Achtung. I find I'm much windier now, than I was when I was younger.
  • HotgossipHotgossip Posts: 22,385
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    My kids used to compete for SBD's. Silent but deadlies!;)

    I also think it's really funny when babies do one and either burst out crying or go wide-eyed with terror as they don't know what's happening.:D
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 10,649
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    I did one that smelled like raw sewage when i was sitting at the back of the bus one night a few months ago

    I could tell the couple next to me were revolted by the putrid stench


    I hope you had the obligatory smug grin on your face.
    We should ALWAYS be proud of EVERYTHING WE CREATE!!!
  • Bedsit BobBedsit Bob Posts: 24,344
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    Farts are universally funny-fact.
    Wet ones less so.

    The good old follow through. :D
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 10,649
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    Bedsit Bob wrote: »
    The good old follow through. :D


    Farts are great but it's never right to feel them trickling down your leg:eek:
  • ShadowmaidenShadowmaiden Posts: 3,030
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    I did one once that seemed to last for ages once. It went on for about a minute or so, like one endless fart:o

    The other night my mum prepared this beef caserole thing for tea that had loads of lentils and mushrooms in it, and although it was lovely my god did we all suffer from it afterwards. The house stank like a sewage works because we couldn't stop farting.

    I think I farted consistently for about twelve hours. Really wet, runny, eggy smelling ones as well:D:o
  • Chuck InglishChuck Inglish Posts: 283
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    I hope you had the obligatory smug grin on your face.
    We should ALWAYS be proud of EVERYTHING WE CREATE!!!

    my reaction was a mixture of shame and the desire to burst out laughing

    oh, and to wretch too. it really was nasty
  • suki csuki c Posts: 6,088
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    I did one once that seemed to last for ages once. It went on for about a minute or so, like one endless fart:o

    The other night my mum prepared this beef caserole thing for tea that had loads of lentils and mushrooms in it, and although it was lovely my god did we all suffer from it afterwards. The house stank like a sewage works because we couldn't stop farting.

    I think I farted consistently for about twelve hours. Really wet, runny, eggy smelling ones as well:D:o

    have you got the recipe?
  • wur86wur86 Posts: 10,494
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    I just wish my o/h would stop when I cuddle her. :mad:
    My pubs have a permenant parting.:D
  • HarryValleyHarryValley Posts: 16,433
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    I did one once that seemed to last for ages once. It went on for about a minute or so, like one endless fart:o

    The other night my mum prepared this beef caserole thing for tea that had loads of lentils and mushrooms in it, and although it was lovely my god did we all suffer from it afterwards. The house stank like a sewage works because we couldn't stop farting.

    I think I farted consistently for about twelve hours. Really wet, runny, eggy smelling ones as well:D:o
    eurgh!
  • RicardodaforceRicardodaforce Posts: 8,576
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    Shouldn't this be in Shatter?
  • stormin normstormin norm Posts: 5,312
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    I did one once that seemed to last for ages once. It went on for about a minute or so, like one endless fart:o

    The other night my mum prepared this beef caserole thing for tea that had loads of lentils and mushrooms in it, and although it was lovely my god did we all suffer from it afterwards. The house stank like a sewage works because we couldn't stop farting.

    I think I farted consistently for about twelve hours. Really wet, runny, eggy smelling ones as well:D:o

    My little boy has done a few of them whilst sitting on our wooden floor in just his pants.........:D:D

    Personally far too many to chose from. I have IBS and often fart loads in the evenings, and I do mean loads :p
  • ShadowmaidenShadowmaiden Posts: 3,030
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    suki c wrote: »
    have you got the recipe?

    I'll have to ask my mum for it.

    The after effects are lethal though, trust me:D
  • suki csuki c Posts: 6,088
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    I'll have to ask my mum for it.

    The after effects are lethal though, trust me:D

    I'll risk it :cool:
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