What's the worst song ever written?

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  • Pink KnightPink Knight Posts: 24,773
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    Technically You Suffer by Napalm Death, 1.316 seconds is just lazy.
    At the moment I am toying between Touch My Bum by the Cheeky Girls and Millenium Prayer.
    I think I was right with Come on Eileen as well.

    Apparently Black Eyed Peas have done a song called Don't Phunk with my Heart. I can't comment as I ignore they exist.
  • Billy HicksBilly Hicks Posts: 475
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    Rebecca Black's 'Yesterday was Thursday, today it is Friday, tomorrow is Saturday and Sunday comes afterwards' will always hold a special place in my heart.

    For contenders of Worst Lyric awards, these have to be up there, although a lot of them fit into the So Bad It's Good category:

    "Boybands! And another one, and another one...and another one"
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HQn93YNHyR0
    (Busted - Year 3000)

    "WHY DO PEOPLE GET OFF ON BIGOTRY INTOLERANCE AND RACIAL INTOLERANCE?!?"
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5mX8gsr9sWc
    (Gary Clail - Human Nature (great track though))

    "Can't complain, mustn't grumble, help yourself to another piece of apple crumble"
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_I3NuwDY5n8
    (ABC - That Was But This Is Now)

    And my personal favourite:

    "They say I'm really sexy, the boys they want to sex me"
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iEe_eraFWWs
    (Black Eyed Peas - My Humps)

    ...and every Tinie Tempah track. Ever. :D
  • mgvsmithmgvsmith Posts: 16,457
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    As usual most of the comments mention songs which a person dislikes as being bad songs, these things don't always follow.

    Unlikely as it may seem there may actually be someone who doesn't like 'Fairytale of New York'. Because they don't like it would not make it a bad song. Nothing could make it a bad song because it is a masterpiece (no silly comments about 'in your opinion').

    On the other hand there may be someone who actually likes the abomination that is 'Mistletoe and Wine' but that will never make one of the worst songs ever constructed into a good song!
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 209
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    mgvsmith wrote: »
    As usual most of the comments mention songs which a person dislikes as being bad songs, these things don't always follow.

    Unlikely as it may seem there may actually be someone who doesn't like 'Fairytale of New York'. Because they don't like it would not make it a bad song. Nothing could make it a bad song because it is a masterpiece (no silly comments about 'in your opinion').

    On the other hand there may be someone who actually likes the abomination that is 'Mistletoe and Wine' but that will never make one of the worst songs ever constructed into a good song!

    I could reference here all the terrible lyrics of Single ladies but I mainly just hate that due to 60% of all gay men learning the routine and being able to perform it whenever it's called for that makes me DESPISE it.
  • mysty211mysty211 Posts: 4,935
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    That JCB song was awful.
  • Jimmy_McNultyJimmy_McNulty Posts: 11,378
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    gangnam style obviously.
  • Buffy AnneBuffy Anne Posts: 133
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    I won't include novelty songs as they are meant to be stupid/bad, so my vote goes to The Time (Dirty Bit) by that talentless clown will.i.am

    I really can't stand him and it bewilders me how popular he is in the UK.
  • Buffy AnneBuffy Anne Posts: 133
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    mysty211 wrote: »
    That JCB song was awful.

    Oh God, yes. I remember that. I found it severely depressing for some reason and it was absolutely inescapable at the time.

    Just utterly terrible, with the hype surrounding it making it seem even worse.
  • mushymanrobmushymanrob Posts: 17,992
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    nah...its a bog standard novelty track, theres far worse.
    mgvsmith wrote: »
    As usual most of the comments mention songs which a person dislikes as being bad songs, these things don't always follow.

    Unlikely as it may seem there may actually be someone who doesn't like 'Fairytale of New York'. Because they don't like it would not make it a bad song. Nothing could make it a bad song because it is a masterpiece (no silly comments about 'in your opinion').

    On the other hand there may be someone who actually likes the abomination that is 'Mistletoe and Wine' but that will never make one of the worst songs ever constructed into a good song!

    exactly, its been hijcked as an 'song i dont like' bashing thread.

    we probably havnt heard the worst song... taking the op literally! :D
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 1,573
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    Scream and Shout by will.I.am

    The most pathetic song I've heard in years. I can't believe they actually had the guts to put something out like that with lyrics so atrocious. No redeeming qualities whatsoever.
  • Buffy AnneBuffy Anne Posts: 133
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    Scream and Shout by will.I.am

    The most pathetic song I've heard in years. I can't believe they actually had the guts to put something out like that with lyrics so atrocious. No redeeming qualities whatsoever.

    Agreed, it's a genuinely horrible song in terms of everything from "lyrics" to production. I really do not know how will.i.am is as popular as he is. It bewilders me. I think this song is selling due to Britney, because I can't imagine it would have any interest from anyone otherwise - it's that bad.
  • dodger0703dodger0703 Posts: 1,957
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    Madonna - Hanky Panky
  • d56d56 Posts: 5,471
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    I forgot about Live It Up - Tulisa too. Shocking.
  • cnbcwatchercnbcwatcher Posts: 56,681
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    fender101 wrote: »
    come on, My Humps, terrible song..

    Ah yes, how could I forget that one? :p
  • Rip the TV EyeRip the TV Eye Posts: 1,687
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    mgvsmith wrote: »
    As usual most of the comments mention songs which a person dislikes as being bad songs, these things don't always follow.

    Unlikely as it may seem there may actually be someone who doesn't like 'Fairytale of New York'. Because they don't like it would not make it a bad song. Nothing could make it a bad song because it is a masterpiece (no silly comments about 'in your opinion').

    On the other hand there may be someone who actually likes the abomination that is 'Mistletoe and Wine' but that will never make one of the worst songs ever constructed into a good song!

    This is why I have forgone listing a whole raft of songs that I find, shall we say, intolerable.

    Stupid Ho is a 'song' where I struggle to think of anyone who could like it, save for the artist and somebody else who thought it was enough of a good idea to give the green light to.
  • WeetibixWeetibix Posts: 1,124
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    gold2040 wrote: »
    98% of today's chart
    ashtray88 wrote: »
    That doesn't even make any sense.

    true ....its nearer 99%
  • ashtray88ashtray88 Posts: 1,531
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    Weetibix wrote: »
    true ....its nearer 99%

    So 99% of today's chart is the worst song ever written? Are you saying 99% of today's chart is actually one song? :eek:
  • RetroMusicFanRetroMusicFan Posts: 6,673
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    I actually love Come On Eileen, I think it's a great song!

    I like Mistletoe And Wine too.

    There are a lot of songs I could choose but I'm going to be controversial (i remember when that was Madonna's favourite word) and go for Hung Up as worst song ever written, I think it's a terrible song, especially for Madonna, Gimme Gimme Gimme is far superior.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 181
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    The Cheeky Girls - Touch My Bum, the worst lyrics ever to appear in a song
  • mgvsmithmgvsmith Posts: 16,457
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    Hutchy258 wrote: »
    The Cheeky Girls - Touch My Bum, the worst lyrics ever to appear in a song

    However, strangely relevant in relation to the revelations about the Liberal Democrats Party Chairman!
  • mushymanrobmushymanrob Posts: 17,992
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    cant abide 'bangarang'
  • designer84designer84 Posts: 12,087
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    PaulBowker wrote: »
    I could reference here all the terrible lyrics of Single ladies but I mainly just hate that due to 60% of all gay men learning the routine and being able to perform it whenever it's called for that makes me DESPISE it.

    LOL and where did you get that figure? it's not a staple in our nights out you know. I don't know any of my gay friends who actually learn a routine to a dance like that. I think anyone can wave their hand in the air and strut a bit. lol

    For worst songs it's probably that "Friday" song for me. It drives me nuts. I personally can't stand any Westlife songs but that's more to do with my musical taste than whether their songs are bad.
  • EvilredzebraEvilredzebra Posts: 16,147
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    ashtray88 wrote: »
    So 99% of today's chart is the worst song ever written? Are you saying 99% of today's chart is actually one song? :eek:

    To be fair, Weetibix has a point - 99% of the stuff in the chart may as well be the same song it's so bland and generic!

    Anyway - my vote goes to the truly awful "Baby" by the Bieber creature.

    "And I'm like baby baby baby ooh
    Like baby baby baby ooh"

    Just DIRE.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 754
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    i think that little things song from one direction is up there with the worst, so awful! :eek:
  • MaksonMakson Posts: 30,477
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    Get Sexy - Sugababes

    I can't believe they ever bothered recording this tripe, never mind actually using it as a lead single off a new album:o

    "When I'm walking down the street they say 'hey sexy'
    Wearing my two-piece at the beach they say 'hey sexy'
    When I'm driving in my car, or standing at the bar,
    It don't matter where I are, they say 'hey sexy' "
    :mad::mad::mad::rolleyes::mad::mad::mad:

    Just in case it wasn't annoying enough already, they throw in a terrible Right Said Fred sample for the chorus:mad:

    No wonder everything went tits up for Sugababes shortly after releasing this song:o

    This thread can be closed now. Get Sexy cannot be topped.
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