Andre's "suffering" (part 2)

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  • momma11momma11 Posts: 3,843
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    :o
    *checks sweepstake*
    *bursts into tears*
    *panics*
    *demands a Steward's Enquiry into whether Goaty and Hmmbop have been bulk-buying Big Nit in an attempt to nobble the charts*




    *calms down a bit*





    Momma, I don't know if you're aware of it, but Specsavers now do hearing aids as well as glasses.
    ;-)

    AS ,
    I can still feel the...... good good good good vibrations... :p
  • Azura's StarAzura's Star Posts: 3,190
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    momma11 wrote: »
    AS ,
    I can still feel the...... good good good good vibrations... :p

    *shudders and tries to think about bunnies and kittens*
    Said it before and I'll say it again, he really doesn't deserve you.
    ;-)

    momma11 wrote: »
    Busted !! :blush:

    I have a large family and they are all susceptible to threats emem I mean bribery .


    And you are all philistines....so there ! :p

    ps. going for number one now , there's a few nieces and nephews , cousins and elderly aunts I've not intimidated yet ;-)


    ^^^^
    >:(
    I demand a judicial review into the sweepstake with immediate effect.
    Wanting to fiddle with Tangoman is all well and good, but fiddling with the sweepstake is a disgrace.
    Bad momma.
  • artlesschaosartlesschaos Posts: 11,345
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    Microkorg wrote: »
    I really don't understand the charts these days? What the hell is an Update chart?
    He's nowhere to be seen on the Official Albums chart (no.20 is Bastille)

    The Offical chart (the real one) is still Sunday. The midweek is a bit of a "Let's see what's going on". Singles and albums that are number 1 in the midweek often are not by the Sunday.

    So Sunday will be the real chart day and the album may have gone up or down by then.
  • artlesschaosartlesschaos Posts: 11,345
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    *shudders and tries to think about bunnies and kittens*
    Said it before and I'll say it again, he really doesn't deserve you.
    ;-)





    ^^^^
    >:(
    I demand a judicial review into the sweepstake with immediate effect.
    Wanting to fiddle with Tangoman is all well and good, but fiddling with the sweepstake is a disgrace.
    Bad momma.

    Bad, bad momma.

    Sigh.

    Anyroadup, I feel we should wait until the weekend to see if Momma's cheating heart will get it's way. Officially.
  • Blue Eyed ladyBlue Eyed lady Posts: 6,007
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    *Tries to sound authoritative* :blush:

    I've had a quick read back & there seems to be some bickering over the Sweepstake rules, therefore as self appointed adjudicator .......

    Nobody is permitted to change their chosen number, sorry Momma, you're stuck with no. 10.

    Nobody is permitted to give prizes away, once again, sorry Daisy but if you win you will be spending the night/weekend with TM.

    The midweek chart is irrelevant, the winner will be announced on Sunday when we see the official position.

    Once again, here are the chosen numbers, anyone who attempts to change their number will be whisked off with TM to a remote island for the remainder of 2014!



    What number will TM's new album get to ......

    Betty Britain 82

    Blue Eyed lady 74

    Azura's Star 100

    Blondie X 55

    artlesschaos 72

    Cym 98

    cazzz 41

    Ella71110 69

    Hmmbop 2 (funniest thing I've heard in a long time)

    Bela 63

    DiamondDoll

    NotaTypo 73

    bunny55

    Goaty 1

    Daisy Bennyboots 44

    j0anne 75

    Kat_12 65

    The Prumeister 147

    scone

    Cyril_Sneer 54

    Anna.Nuttall 85

    livingdeadgirl 50

    Butterface 53

    Essex Angel* 92

    kiviraat 38

    changa

    Not fussy 96

    Gortonian 60

    Momma11 10

    Winner's prize....... http://www.chew.hu/entry_images/trophy-trappista.jpg
  • artlesschaosartlesschaos Posts: 11,345
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    Sanity is restored.


    Well...

    you know. ish.
  • smilliekyliesmilliekylie Posts: 3,661
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    Own up you Guys, who's responsible for these two latest reviews on Amazon :)

    1.0 out of 5 stars Insomnia?, 27 May 2014
    By 6010
    This review is from: Big Night (Audio CD)
    Try this instant cure.... BIG NIT!

    The Tangoed Twonk tries his hand at Swing (only a few years too late), and fails miserably.
    He just does not have the voice for this kind of stuff.
    Best go back to the MJ impressions, now his record company have started exhuming his old demos as "new" material

    Graverobbers

    Best Avoided[



    1.0 out of 5 stars An assault on the senses.All of them., 27 May 2014
    By Cait
    This review is from: Big Night (Audio CD)
    This is not big band music.
    It's not even medium-sized.
    It's like a musical pick and mix, but in the worst possible way.
    Track after track of nasally, tuneless whining, with no musical merit whatsoever. Not even the most ardent fan of Peter Andre could possibly listen to this without wanting to tear off their own ears.
    Andre is the musical equivalent of anaglypta wallpaper - no one likes it, but it's virtually impossible to completely get rid of.
    Save your money - unless you are looking for a way of keeping your friends and neighbours away from you.
    Or a novelty frisbee.
    Dire, dire, dire.
  • BelaBela Posts: 2,568
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    *Tries to sound authoritative* :blush:

    Tries and fails. >:(

    Did you miss the part where Momma's cheatin' heart made us weep? And cry foul! foul!, and lose us sleep? Where we stand by - so helplessly, while she downloads Big Nit for free. >:(

    >:(
  • artlesschaosartlesschaos Posts: 11,345
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    Bela wrote: »
    Tries and fails. >:(

    Did you miss the part where Momma's cheatin' heart made us weep? And cry foul! foul!, and lose us sleep? Where we stand by - so helplessly, while she downloads Big Nit for free. >:(

    >:(

    and...*quakes at the horror of it* FORCES her CHILDREN to aid her.


    Forces...

    her

    CHILDREN.


    Oh, the HUMANITY!!:o:o::(
  • Azura's StarAzura's Star Posts: 3,190
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    Sanity is restored.


    Well...

    you know. ish.
    Bela wrote: »
    Tries and fails. >:(

    Did you miss the part where Momma's cheatin' heart made us weep? And cry foul! foul!, and lose us sleep? Where we stand by - so helplessly, while she downloads Big Nit for free. >:(

    >:(
    and...*quakes at the horror of it* FORCES her CHILDREN to aid her.


    Forces...

    her

    CHILDREN.


    Oh, the HUMANITY!!:o:o::(


    Look right, it's all very well you lot having a laugh, but if I've understood the rules of the sweepstake correctly, unless Big Nit plummets out of the charts like a stone in the next few days (which is fairly likely I'll admit) I could well be in line for a date with destiny with Tangoman - after Pru has finished with him of course.
    And that is not bloody funny.
    Does anyone know where I can get a life-sized laminated picture of Eamonn and a vat of Nutella at short notice??
  • artlesschaosartlesschaos Posts: 11,345
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    Look right, it's all very well you lot having a laugh, but if I've understood the rules of the sweepstake correctly, unless Big Nit plummets out of the charts like a stone in the next few days (which is fairly likely I'll admit) I could well be in line for a date with destiny with Tangoman - after Pru has finished with him of course.
    And that is not bloody funny.
    Does anyone know where I can get a life-sized laminated picture of Eamonn and a vat of Nutella at short notice??

    Not sure what your issue with - it's bloody hil-AIR-ious to me!
  • Blue Eyed ladyBlue Eyed lady Posts: 6,007
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    Bela wrote: »
    Tries and fails. >:(

    Did you miss the part where Momma's cheatin' heart made us weep? And cry foul! foul!, and lose us sleep? Where we stand by - so helplessly, while she downloads Big Nit for free. >:(

    >:(

    :o
    Harsh! You do realise how difficult it is to control a rabble of women desperate for a night with TM.

    However...............upon closer reading, motion granted.
    Explain this revelation Momma, failure to do so will result in disqualification ;-)
  • Blue Eyed ladyBlue Eyed lady Posts: 6,007
    Forum Member
    Look right, it's all very well you lot having a laugh, but if I've understood the rules of the sweepstake correctly, unless Big Nit plummets out of the charts like a stone in the next few days (which is fairly likely I'll admit) I could well be in line for a date with destiny with Tangoman - after Pru has finished with him of course.
    And that is not bloody funny.
    Does anyone know where I can get a life-sized laminated picture of Eamonn and a vat of Nutella at short notice??

    No it isn't, however what is, is the fact you could win not just a date with TM but a full weekend!:o:D
  • The PrumeisterThe Prumeister Posts: 22,398
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    Look right, it's all very well you lot having a laugh, but if I've understood the rules of the sweepstake correctly, unless Big Nit plummets out of the charts like a stone in the next few days (which is fairly likely I'll admit) I could well be in line for a date with destiny with Tangoman - after Pru has finished with him of course.
    And that is not bloody funny.
    Does anyone know where I can get a life-sized laminated picture of Eamonn and a vat of Nutella at short notice??



    :o:o:o:o:o:(>:(:cry::cry::kitty:
  • smilliekyliesmilliekylie Posts: 3,661
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    KInda felt slightly despairing that TM managed to get the atrocity that is Big NIt into the Midweeks Top 20, but then looked at the chart placings above him.

    Despite the massive publicity overload with tv appearances, record signings, huge social media blitz, 'Definately Maybe', an album now 20 years old by Oasis, is currently outselling TM at Number 17 :)

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio1/chart/updatealbums

    I feel a sense of order has been returned to the universe. Happy Days, Music hasn't died yet :D
  • momma11momma11 Posts: 3,843
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    and...*quakes at the horror of it* FORCES her CHILDREN to aid her.


    Forces...

    her

    CHILDREN.


    Oh, the HUMANITY!!:o:o::(

    :blush: oohh the shame of it !
    :o
    Harsh! You do realise how difficult it is to control a rabble of women desperate for a night with TM.

    However...............upon closer reading, motion granted.
    Explain this revelation Momma, failure to do so will result in disqualification ;-)

    Summoned to the Star Chamber :o

    In my defence , desperate times call for desperate measures !


    Come on guys ! I'm fighting a guerrilla action here.

    I'm forced to use any and all means at my disposal.

    Now , where did I put those elderly aunts.....:p
  • Blue Eyed ladyBlue Eyed lady Posts: 6,007
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    KInda felt slightly despairing that TM managed to get the atrocity that is Big NIt into the Midweeks Top 20, but then looked at the chart placings above him.

    Despite the massive publicity overload with tv appearances, record signings, huge social media blitz, 'Definately Maybe', an album now 20 years old by Oasis, is currently outselling TM at Number 17 :)

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio1/chart/updatealbums

    I feel a sense of order has been returned to the universe. Happy Days, Music hasn't died yet :D

    The relief I feel is indescribable.:)
    momma11 wrote: »
    :blush: oohh the shame of it !



    Summoned to the Star Chamber :o

    In my defence , desperate times call for desperate measures !


    Come on guys ! I'm fighting a guerrilla action here.

    I'm forced to use any and all means at my disposal.

    Now , where did I put those elderly aunts.....:p

    You've put a very good case forward Momma, the thought of you soldiering on fighting TM's corner, added with smilliekylie's positive post has softened me, therefore you're not disqualified, however you will keep no. 10 but anymore dirty tricks will result in you being removed from the sweepstake with immediate effect.;-) :D
  • smilliekyliesmilliekylie Posts: 3,661
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    The relief I feel is indescribable.:)



    You've put a very good case forward Momma, the thought of you soldiering on fighting TM's corner, added with smilliekylie's positive post has softened me, therefore you're not disqualified, however you will keep no. 10 but anymore dirty tricks will result in you being removed from the sweepstake with immediate effect.;-) :D

    Hmmmmm, this has just appeared on Amazon ;-)

    http://www.amazon.co.uk/product-reviews/B00KJ93PJA

    momma11

    This review is from: Big Night (Audio CD)
    And I love it , I have played it non-stop since it arrived from Amazon .

    I get the impression that he enjoys the songs and I thought that came across clearly on the album.

    I can't wait to see him perform them later on in the year.

    More of the same please Pete !
  • DiamondDollDiamondDoll Posts: 21,460
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    Hmmmmm, this has just appeared on Amazon ;-)

    http://www.amazon.co.uk/product-reviews/B00KJ93PJA

    momma11

    This review is from: Big Night (Audio CD)
    And I love it , I have played it non-stop since it arrived from Amazon .

    I get the impression that he enjoys the songs and I thought that came across clearly on the album.

    I can't wait to see him perform them later on in the year.

    More of the same please Pete !

    Busted. :D:D
  • momma11momma11 Posts: 3,843
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    Hmmmmm, this has just appeared on Amazon ;-)

    http://www.amazon.co.uk/product-reviews/B00KJ93PJA

    momma11

    This review is from: Big Night (Audio CD)
    And I love it , I have played it non-stop since it arrived from Amazon .

    I get the impression that he enjoys the songs and I thought that came across clearly on the album.

    I can't wait to see him perform them later on in the year.

    More of the same please Pete !

    :blush:

    stalker ! :p
  • Azura's StarAzura's Star Posts: 3,190
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    :o:(>:(:cry::cry::kitty:

    Have you not read the rules properly?
    If Big Nit stays where it is,and if neither of us can find a way to either nobble the sweepstake or blackmail BEL, you my friend, are the furthest away, and thus in pole position to win the top prize.
    I will have to make do with whatever is left of Tangoman when you're done.

    KInda felt slightly despairing that TM managed to get the atrocity that is Big NIt into the Midweeks Top 20, but then looked at the chart placings above him.

    Despite the massive publicity overload with tv appearances, record signings, huge social media blitz, 'Definately Maybe', an album now 20 years old by Oasis, is currently outselling TM at Number 17 :)

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio1/chart/updatealbums

    I feel a sense of order has been returned to the universe. Happy Days, Music hasn't died yet :D

    Maybe it hasn't died, but with Big Nit inexplicably at Number 20, it's clearly not very well at all.

    momma11 wrote: »
    :blush:

    stalker ! :p

    ^^^
    BEL - she's at it again.
    I think that momma should be disqualified for her own good, before she inveigles any more of her unsuspecting relatives into spending their life savings on Big Nit.

    Continued here: Peter Andre (part 3)
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