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Colleague and lift to work....
Just a bit of advice wanted about weather I'm being mean or not. For the past 6 months I've been giving a colleague a lift to and from work two days a week. She does not drive and it saves her husband (who is at home) bringing her. Anyway when she asked me she worded it so as i would think it would be now and again, so I refused her offer of petrol money. Fast forward 6 months and I'm now stuck with taking and dropping off both days, never been offered any petrol money and to make it worse I actually have to go a different route to work and home which equals an extra 4 miles a day, just to give her a lift. I'm starting to resent taking her but for some reason feel awful about telling her so but really want to get out of the whole situation. grrrrrr
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or go in early and leave early and tell her she'll need to make her own arrangements.
Easy to say it here, but you need to front up and say so. Tell the truth - that it adds time and distance to your journeys to & from work and that what was originally a temporary arrangement seems to have become the norm, and that you didn't expect it to.
I would only give her a lift if she actually lived en route to my workplace. I would echo what everyone else has said - just tell her. If you don't want to pick her up, its your car - just tell her your circumstances have changed and for her to make her own way there.
You're not her taxi service..................!!! Tell her to get the bus........!!!
......she might want to come and join the 'gym' as well!!!!
With the OP having to only drive 2 miles extra each way it's probably not adding much time to their journey (unless the traffic is a nightmare). So the person who they pick up may question why they seem to be arriving and leaving work at the same time. The OP doesn't want to put themselves in a position where they have to start actually leaving at different times to keep up appearances I suspect.
I've been on both side of the situation: when I was younger a friend gave me a lift to work every weekday for about 6 months and I never thought to offer anything as it was on his way. Then a couple of years ago I started giving a lift to a work college who stayed at her BF's in the same village as me and she never offered any money after the first couple of times. She then split up with the BF and asked me to drive into town to get her (which was completely out of my way and horrendous traffic). I point blank refused unless there was a good reason for why she needed a lift that day and she got the message.
Well, whilst you're right about the two miles each way (sorry, I thought it was four), she wouldn't have to worry about the time she arrived at or left work. The whole point of the excuse was that she spends the same time at work but more time at home. But, as you say, two miles won't make that much difference, time wise.
Ah I see the point you were making. But yeah two miles won't make much of a difference time wise so the person may question it still.
I think the OP just has to be upfront on this it seems.
Absolutely. I personally hate being put in this position - not the driving because I don't drive - just the expected favour of "because you've always done it, you always will". That sort of thing.
How close are you to her ? If not particularly, then there are numerous excuses you can make. You have to go shopping / visiting a relative / have to work late in the evening. Doctors appointment in the morning. You could just make an excuse once one week and then again a couple of weeks later and just gradually become more and more unreliable until she gets into the habit of making her own way to work.
Or you could start listening to some sort of horrible music, very loudly, whilst singing along very badly. If she doesn't like it, she knows what she can do
If you weren't doing it so regularly you would probably resent it less.
/Funny. Autocorrect capitalised Satan but not god. My phone is evil apparently.
Think it's only fair for her husband to do the honours now.
For six months.
Think I will just tell her the truth -that I want more flexibility with my journey to work. Oh yes we do work closely together and spend breaks together but don't see each other outside of work at all. (except for the damn car journey lol)
She's just taken advantage of your kindness and will now have a wake up call. I sometimes wonder how these folk manage to get through life living off the backs of others.
As someone already mentioned some people just take advantage and that's what has happened here.
Yep. I know if the situation ever arises again it will be a polite but firm NO. Shame really because I'm always more than happy to help someone out but this has put me off.
On this thread people were saying that as soon as the insurance see you was travelling to work with a friend they will want to know if money changed hands.
Sorry but I didnt follow the thread to the end so I cant confirm if this is correct or not, but it is worth looking into.
From Direct Line policy document:
Which I believe is typical. So as long as you're not making a profit you're fine. Splitting the fuel cost 50/50 and leaving you with the other costs, servicing, tax, insurance etc, would leave you nowhere near making a profit.