The high cost of childcare- working Mums how do you do it ?

[Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 275
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My daughters are 9 and 6.
I work from home and in school hours.
So, I've been looking around at jobs recently and found one which would necessitate the use of a breakfast and after school club every morning/afternoon. It costs £30 to register with the club, then £24 per day ( for both of them ) for the after school club and that's before factoring in breakfast club which is another £18 per day for both of them. (£9 each ) I would end up with virtually no money left after paying for childcare.
How do working Mothers/parents do it?
Melissa
( we don't qualify for any help with childcare costs )
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Comments

  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 848
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    We are in the same position as you. I really wanted to stop working nightshifts as it is really knackering to do a nightshift then come home and look after our two but with the cost of childcare, we can't afford to and we both work full-time on decent money!
    I will be on nights for about another five years or so before I can go back to day shifts.
    It the choice we made though so we just muddle through as best we can.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 275
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    I'm not needing to work for financial reasons, just to get me out and about more in the world, meeting people. I do voluntary work and work from home, but when I look at the cost of daycare, it's extortionate. Wrap around care for school age kids is so pricey.. most Mums I know work outside the home, but I've no idea how they afford it, unless they earn mega bucks or have relatives on call.
  • mildredhubblemildredhubble Posts: 6,447
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    I struggle, I rely on family a lot otherwise it would be pointless me working, I want to set a good example to my child. On the plus side because I work nights I do get 4 days off with him.
  • GemofaBirdGemofaBird Posts: 1,962
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    When I go back to work after mat leave, my mum will be looking after the wee one, I couldn't afford it otherwise plus my bf and I both work backshift so childcare would be near impossible to get.
    My mum also looked after my daughter while I worked up until she was old enough to look after herself and she shares childcare of my 2 nieces with their other gran so their mum can work.
  • Welsh-ladWelsh-lad Posts: 51,908
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    I really don't know how people cope with the cost.

    Sometimes so much of a parent's wage goes on childcare, it would actually be better for one of them to stay at home with the kids and draw in the purse-strings a bit.
  • mildredhubblemildredhubble Posts: 6,447
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    Welsh-lad wrote: »
    I really don't know how people cope with the cost.

    Sometimes so much of a parent's wage goes on childcare, it would actually be better for one of them to stay at home with the kids and draw in the purse-strings a bit.

    However it is just as important to pass onto your children a work ethic from both parents. I would love to be a SAHM but I also want to show my children the their mother isn't just a mother.
  • SystemSystem Posts: 2,096,970
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    I know it's not always possible for some people, but it's a shame this country isn't more family orientated like many others, i'm sure then we wouldn't have such a problem with child care.
  • netcurtainsnetcurtains Posts: 23,494
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    I don't, it's cheaper for me to stay home and my kids prefer it especially my youngest, he's had enough of being away from me and home come the end of the school day. He'd find it horrendous to have that time extended. He can't wait to get home for a cuddle.
    I suppose if I was career orientated it would bother me but as I've hated practically every job I've ever had the misfortune to have, I'm happy to have opted out of the rat race.
  • tysonstormtysonstorm Posts: 24,609
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    *cough cough* CSA.
  • mildredhubblemildredhubble Posts: 6,447
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    tysonstorm wrote: »
    *cough cough* CSA.

    Eh? Is that how you pay for childcare? Then that's how it should be.
  • Welsh-ladWelsh-lad Posts: 51,908
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    However it is just as important to pass onto your children a work ethic from both parents. I would love to be a SAHM but I also want to show my children the their mother isn't just a mother.

    I think that's admirable in a way but I have mixed feelings about it.
    The role of SAHM / SAHD has been degraded and is now often viewed with derision.

    It's sad becasue raising one's children is probably the most important job one will ever do.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 275
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    Welsh-lad wrote: »
    I think that's admirable in a way but I have mixed feelings about it.
    The role of SAHM / SAHD has been degraded and is now often viewed with derision.

    It's sad becasue raising one's children is probably the most important job one will ever do.

    I agree. I've been a SAHM for nine years and have the strongest bond with my daughters; we are incredibly close. They see how busy I am, how much work I do around the house and how busy I've been with various College courses, and the long hours their Dad does in the City, so they totally understand work ethics !
  • SystemSystem Posts: 2,096,970
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    Eh? Is that how you pay for childcare? Then that's how it should be.

    Some people have been screwed unfairly by the CSA and it's not just been one side who have thought the CSA were being unfair.
  • mildredhubblemildredhubble Posts: 6,447
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    humphryb wrote: »
    Some people have been screwed unfairly by the CSA and it's not just been one side who have thought the CSA were being unfair.

    Erm ???? I never justified the actions of the CSA however if money is given to a single parent through the CSA then it should be used for childcare etc..
  • netcurtainsnetcurtains Posts: 23,494
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    Welsh-lad wrote: »
    I think that's admirable in a way but I have mixed feelings about it.
    The role of SAHM / SAHD has been degraded and is now often viewed with derision.

    It's sad becasue raising one's children is probably the most important job one will ever do.

    It is sad. I have people look down on me as a stay at home mum but for me this is the most important job I shall ever have and I'll get no second chances at it. No employer would be happy with me putting the kids first and I will put my kids first, always.
  • SystemSystem Posts: 2,096,970
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    I do voluntary work that is just during term times.

    I have looked into going back to paid employment but there would be no monetary reward after childcare costs above what we have now, so have decided to opt for a type of work that fits in with the family more - this also saves me the hassle factor of arranging childcare.

    At the minute I have 2 of my 3 off sick from school with suspected swine flu, next week I could have the last child off. I have not been at work because of this for the past two weeks. Due to my children going to different schools, all their holidays/teacher training days are staggered too meaning not only would childcare for three children be very expensive it would be erratic too. Also if they are ill, as now, I'd have to be at home, which would mean letting my employer down when perhaps it's not convenient.

    Therefore, so they understand the work ethic and the fact I need to do something more later on than only being their Mum, I do the voluntary work, which hopefully will lead to regular employment in a few years time, when my children have become more independent.

    I feel I have the best of both worlds at the minute, I get to look after my children the way I want and do something just for me too.

    *whispers* I have a bit of a 5 year plan thing going on, as for where I intend to be career wise later, but haven't told anyone else in case it doesn't come to fruition. ;)
  • mildredhubblemildredhubble Posts: 6,447
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    It is sad. I have people look down on me as a stay at home mum but for me this is the most important job I shall ever have and I'll get no second chances at it. No employer would be happy with me putting the kids first and I will put my kids first, always.

    Same here, I always put my child above my job. I would never look down on a SAHM, I'm slightly jealous as I need to work. However I still believe I am setting my son a great example.... it works for my family, I do however work shifts which mean I do get 4 days off with my son.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 10,273
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    I've only just gone back to work after 7 years being a ''SAHM''. Luckerly my OH makes enough for us to live on (just about, we're by no means well off) so it just made sense for me to be at home with the kids. I've never had that urge that some women have to forge a career or to be anything else other than a mum, I was blissfully happy just being at home enjoying my kids. I dont think ''work ethic'' is something that pre-scool children need to be aware of. Theres plenty of time for that when there in school.
  • tysonstormtysonstorm Posts: 24,609
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    Eh? Is that how you pay for childcare? Then that's how it should be.

    I don't pay for childcare, the ex did, but she got "help" from the State. I paid my bit which went on booze, cigarettes, drugs and nights out. Which was nice for her. :D
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 4,864
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    It is sad. I have people look down on me as a stay at home mum but for me this is the most important job I shall ever have and I'll get no second chances at it. No employer would be happy with me putting the kids first and I will put my kids first, always.

    Are you saying that working mums don't put their kids first?
  • mildredhubblemildredhubble Posts: 6,447
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    tysonstorm wrote: »
    I don't pay for childcare, the ex did, but she got "help" from the State. I paid my bit which went on booze, cigarettes, drugs and nights out. Which was nice for her. :D

    I'm assuming your ex is a working mum, seeing as this is a thread about working mums..... then I'm sure plenty of her money went on the things above.

    I'm not saying it is right but if your contribution was fair and not excessive, the child/children are well cared for and provided for, then it's not really up for debate.
  • netcurtainsnetcurtains Posts: 23,494
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    orangebird wrote: »
    Are you saying that working mums don't put their kids first?

    They're not always fortunate enough with their employers to be able to do so. I see many children in the playground in a morning full of cold, whingeing and crying and their mums rush off to work because they can't take time off to look after them, instead the teacher is lumbered with an unhappy poorly child who should be home in bed instead of spreading their germs around the entire school.
    A friend of mine took hers to school after he'd been up all night with sickness and diarroeah because she couldn't take the day off. Poor bairn looked washed out not to mention the risk he was imposing on the other kids.
    How many employers are happy to let you have a day off every time your kid is ill?
    Not bloody many. If you work for a supermarket it's hard enough to take a day off if you're ill never mind one of your kids.
    I couldn't do it, I couldn't drop my poorly kid off at school when all they want is to be at home with me, being looked after. I wouldn't ask for a day off if one of mine was ill, I'd just take it. How long do you think I'd last before I was fired?
  • QwertyGirl1771QwertyGirl1771 Posts: 4,472
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    I have been very fortunate when it comes to work. I took almost 2 years off work when I had my daughter and hubby would work, but once I started to work, my hubby took early retirement and everything fell into place. I can work as and when, I can do over time and cover shifts at short notice and hubby is at home. I have never had to use motherhood as an excuse not to do a hard days work. If I cannot do the job, I wouldn't apply in the first place.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 4,864
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    They're not always fortunate enough with their employers to be able to do so. I see many children in the playground in a morning full of cold, whingeing and crying and their mums rush off to work because they can't take time off to look after them, instead the teacher is lumbered with an unhappy poorly child who should be home in bed instead of spreading their germs around the entire school.
    A friend of mine took hers to school after he'd been up all night with sickness and diarroeah because she couldn't take the day off. Poor bairn looked washed out not to mention the risk he was imposing on the other kids.
    How many employers are happy to let you have a day off every time your kid is ill?
    Not bloody many. If you work for a supermarket it's hard enough to take a day off if you're ill never mind one of your kids.
    I couldn't do it, I couldn't drop my poorly kid off at school when all they want is to be at home with me, being looked after. I wouldn't ask for a day off if one of mine was ill, I'd just take it. How long do you think I'd last before I was fired?

    You keep your kids off school because they have a snotty nose?!
  • snorksnork Posts: 1,464
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    orangebird wrote: »
    You keep your kids of school because they have a snotty nose?!

    I think your missing the point slightly. I think netcurtains is mearly saying that unfortunatley working mum's can't always put their children first because of the inflexablity of their employers.

    There are pro's and cons for each situation. Children who mix with others in childcare tend to pick up different skills to those that stay at home with thier mums/dads.

    There is also a horrible assumption about "working mums" that they aren't putting their children first because they want to "have it all" i.e. career and family. Some have to work from neccessity, not everyone is a high flying city type. Or, their are the mum's that would go crazy stuck with kids 24/7 so have a job to get some adult conversation and there is no shame that.

    I don't frown on mum's who work (I was one until recently - did night shifts) and I don't look down on mum's that stay at home. However, the price of decent childcare is ridiculously high. When my daughter is old enough to go to school, I'll go back to full time employment.
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