Falling for a friend.......has it ever happened to you?
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Hi guys,
I'd be really interested to know your opinions and experiences of crossing that boundary between friendship and romance.
Have you ever developed feelings for a friend? What was the outcome? Did it work? Was it awkward?
Or perhaps some of you just kept it all inside and never even told that person how you really feel? Perhaps that's the best way?
Please let me know, I'd love to hear your experiences
In case you are interested, the reason I ask is that I have recently realized that I really do have strong feelings for one of my friends. We have not seen each other in over 2 years (he moved back to a different country) and it was only when we met again recently that I realized! I will never tell him of-course, as it will prob never work due to the distance and a couple of other factors......
I'd be really interested to know your opinions and experiences of crossing that boundary between friendship and romance.
Have you ever developed feelings for a friend? What was the outcome? Did it work? Was it awkward?
Or perhaps some of you just kept it all inside and never even told that person how you really feel? Perhaps that's the best way?
Please let me know, I'd love to hear your experiences
In case you are interested, the reason I ask is that I have recently realized that I really do have strong feelings for one of my friends. We have not seen each other in over 2 years (he moved back to a different country) and it was only when we met again recently that I realized! I will never tell him of-course, as it will prob never work due to the distance and a couple of other factors......
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What happened? How did you let him know? What was his reaction?
Got to the vital part of convo and she wanted to say something before I did which was that she is having fun being single and loves me as a friend. I followed that up with umm errr ummm and made up something but right inside I was dying as it was just at that point I was going to say how I felt. Typical! but I got over it in the end and we are still the best of mates.
I drunkenly told him I really liked him and was falling for him. We have a really open friendship, there's nothing we wouldn't tell each other I don't think. I can't really remember his reaction but he was cool about it and we chatted for ages. We wouldn't work as a couple though anyway, I'm sure of it. So it's good we just stayed friends.
Obviously, I never said anything...
It's nice to hear that in both of your cases it worked out.
Even if it is not in the way you hoped- ie. the other person also declaring their undying love for you, you were still able to continue your friendships and move on.
I guess things are awkward and weird only if you make them awkward and weird yourself!
A year later there was a guy I became good friends with and after a while I realised I was crushing on him. We hung out like all the time and did flirt a bit - luckily he asked me to be his girlfriend so I sorta played it cool like 'yeah ok then'
I didn't feel the same way and panicked at the idea of losing her friendship, so I pretended I misunderstood and said something inane like "You're one of my absolutely favourite friends, too" (which was true) and gave her a quick hug. She let the so-called misunderstanding stand.
Unfortunately, that unresolved issue became an elephant in the room. This created a huge invisible wall between us, which eventually made us avoid each other. We were at a boarding school, so avoiding each other was rather impossible.
After a few days, due to the others noticing our estrangement, I cornered her in a corridor and told her I didn't feel the same way, and I wanted us to stay friends. She immediately denied she said she liked me 'like that' and blamed me for creating drama by 'misunderstanding' her. I apologised and she accepted. Yeah, we were still pretending. Ridiculous.
We became friends again, but it wasn't same as before. Not surprising as we lied and deceived each other throughout that awkward mess.
I'm sure had I stayed there something would have:)
At the beginning of June I had a bad breakup and was devastated.
one of my male friends was amazing - we didn't talk about the break up but did things and he made me laugh.
we went out on friday night and had a good night and ended up sleeping together
and now we have another date planned
i don't know how it will pan out but right now its all feeling pretty good.
I'd disagree.
I've got a good friend who told me he was attracted to me a week after I split up with my partner. I told him in no uncertain terms that I did not feel the same, and asked him if he could continue being friends with me without such intentions. He agreed, and he's stuck to it.
I don't know what's going on in his head (obviously), but he has not made any moves towards me since that conversation, and he knows that if he did I would back away very quickly. I do not string him along, or take advantage of him, and I support him as a friend as he does me. As far as I’m concerned our friendship is just that, a friendship, nothing more and never will be - and I've told him exactly that. His feelings on the matter are his own to deal with.
My mum and dad were friends for 4 years before they realised they were in love. They were married for 27 years before my lovely dad passed away.
I know we wouldnt work so why mess it up.
And the unavailable people are always so beautiful, too.