Meeting someone for the fourth time today, feeling nervous as there has been a 2 week gap since the last meet. Worried distance may be an issue but there never seems to be anyone nice local.
Your lack of sympathy and major self indulgence is outstanding well done
I dont understand what you mean? I was generalising and just saying that some have had positive dates and others havent and I hope everyone has more ups than downs.
Meeting someone for the fourth time today, feeling nervous as there has been a 2 week gap since the last meet. Worried distance may be an issue but there never seems to be anyone nice local.
Good luck! hope all goes well, distance never works for me but it does work for others so there is hope. I agree that there isn't many nice ones local, seems to be the same issue for a lot of people I know.
Anyway, feeling low anyway because I lost my job today and this just made me feel even worse and now I'm wondering what the hell is wrong with me.
Thanks. I've been on eharmony a couple of months now, had a quite a lot of interest at first but seems to have gone completely dead recently, although I've just started talking to a couple of new men. Also giving POF a go, since it's free.[/QUOTE]
POF has improved a bit lately I think. I am so sorry you have lost your job, what a kick.... but the others are right. Try not to beat yourself up about it and certainly don't beat yourself up about it.
I've cancelled my coffee date as I've woken up with an allergic reaction so have hives on my face. Wonderful.
Thanks. I've been on eharmony a couple of months now, had a quite a lot of interest at first but seems to have gone completely dead recently, although I've just started talking to a couple of new men. Also giving POF a go, since it's free.
POF has improved a bit lately I think. I am so sorry you have lost your job, what a kick.... but the others are right. Try not to beat yourself up about it and certainly don't beat yourself up about it.
I've cancelled my coffee date as I've woken up with an allergic reaction so have hives on my face. Wonderful.[/QUOTE]
Cheers. Feeling better today, think it was just the initial disappointment on top of everything else that got to me.
Still keep up with all your news on here and am always pleased to hear when people have had good dates. Also full of sympathy for everyone who is having dating/job/any other problems at the moment- hope things soon improve for you all
I'm having a wallow and feeling sorry for myself at the moment as literally not a single man I have messaged on POF recently has messaged me back And I promise I do make an effort and don't just write "Hi, how are you?" ! So I've convinced myself I'm hideous and unlovable
Still keep up with all your news on here and am always pleased to hear when people have had good dates. Also full of sympathy for everyone who is having dating/job/any other problems at the moment- hope things soon improve for you all
I'm having a wallow and feeling sorry for myself at the moment as literally not a single man I have messaged on POF recently has messaged me back And I promise I do make an effort and don't just write "Hi, how are you?" ! So I've convinced myself I'm hideous and unlovable
Hope other people are having better luck!
Nobody is hideous and unlovable, POF is cyclical and new people join all the time. The person who fancies the arse off you might join tomorrow or next week! Online dating is a bit brutal though, I've said it before, but things can turn out well. You just never know what's around the corner. I only messaged one woman on POF, we're going on a third date this week and every time I think about her I smile to myself, I'm really keen on her. Three weeks ago I would have laughed at myself for even thinking about this kind of thing happening, so you really never know. Happy hunting! X
Nobody is hideous and unlovable, POF is cyclical and new people join all the time. The person who fancies the arse off you might join tomorrow or next week! Online dating is a bit brutal though, I've said it before, but things can turn out well. You just never know what's around the corner. I only messaged one woman on POF, we're going on a third date this week and every time I think about her I smile to myself, I'm really keen on her. Three weeks ago I would have laughed at myself for even thinking about this kind of thing happening, so you really never know. Happy hunting! X
Thank you I know you're right really, was just feeling sorry for myself!
That's lovely to hear; good luck for your third date, hope it goes as well as the first two!
I went on my date last night and got on well she was really nervous though and I had to take the lead of conversation quite a bit as she looked a bit like a rabbit in headlights. Went to Harvester lol had a nice meal and took down each others numbers. She seems really nice, we have some things in common and may meet up again.
Still keep up with all your news on here and am always pleased to hear when people have had good dates. Also full of sympathy for everyone who is having dating/job/any other problems at the moment- hope things soon improve for you all
I'm having a wallow and feeling sorry for myself at the moment as literally not a single man I have messaged on POF recently has messaged me back And I promise I do make an effort and don't just write "Hi, how are you?" ! So I've convinced myself I'm hideous and unlovable
Hope other people are having better luck!
I see it as they have missed out on dating you, its their loss. Keep trying at the dating and one day a man will message you back try not to get too down about it. I remember going a whole year without any girl messaging me back so I gave up then out of the blue I had someone message me and we went on a date. Keep your chin up something will happen.
Well considering I'm supposed to meeting "Saturday girl " I'm 40 minutes and haven't heard from her all morning I think I can safely say that we aren't meeting ... I'm just glad I didn't leave home and left standing there like a plank
I mean is it too much for a text saying I've reconsidered or can't meet something's come up
That's just bad form if she's agreed to meet at a place at a specific time, and then doesn't turn up without properly canceling.
But how do you know for sure she wasn't on her way? For some of my first meetings I usually arrange a few days in advance and we may not confirm the day of or the day before. I am usually pretty nervous that they won't turn up in those cases, but I usually don't organize places too far away.
That's just bad form if she's agreed to meet at a place at a specific time, and then doesn't turn up without properly canceling.
But how do you know for sure she wasn't on her way? For some of my first meetings I usually arrange a few days in advance and we may not confirm the day of or the day before. I am usually pretty nervous that they won't turn up in those cases, but I usually don't organize places too far away.
To be fair I'm sure she would have said "where are you", which I'm assuming she didn't. Booooooooo to her
Thanks. Not going to start looking straight away as waiting for an operation to sort out sinus issues which is why I lost my job in the first place.
KitKat,
I'm sure there's more to this, but if you got fired for solely for having sinus issues (which could have been fixed by an operation - meaning your performance would also improve), there is potentially an HR issue.
That's just bad form if she's agreed to meet at a place at a specific time, and then doesn't turn up without properly canceling.
But how do you know for sure she wasn't on her way? For some of my first meetings I usually arrange a few days in advance and we may not confirm the day of or the day before. I am usually pretty nervous that they won't turn up in those cases, but I usually don't organize places too far away.
No that's the thing we had plans to meet Saturday afternoon ... And the plan in place was to text her in the morning as I had plans to help a mate move some things from his flat to storage which was only going to take a couple of hours max
It turned out he didn't need my help again so I text her to let her know I could meet earlier or at the prearranged time ... And I didn't hear anything from her at all and still waiting to hear from her now I won't be holding my breath
I've decided to take a break from it all now it's starting to get me down and playing havoc with my self esteem ... So I'm gonna take some time off hit the gym hard and start to feel better about myself and then go back to it ..
KitKat,
I'm sure there's more to this, but if you got fired for solely for having sinus issues (which could have been fixed by an operation - meaning your performance would also improve), there is potentially an HR issue.
Hi,
Technically I was still on a probation period so I don't think there is much I can do but thank you for the reply.
Still trying to meet new people but not a lot happening right now. Usually goes through quiet spells though so still hopeful!
I see it as they have missed out on dating you, its their loss. Keep trying at the dating and one day a man will message you back try not to get too down about it. I remember going a whole year without any girl messaging me back so I gave up then out of the blue I had someone message me and we went on a date. Keep your chin up something will happen.
Thank you I will keep my chin up; I know everyone on here has had similar (or much worse!) experiences but it's just a matter of perseverance
Nobody is hideous and unlovable, POF is cyclical and new people join all the time. The person who fancies the arse off you might join tomorrow or next week! Online dating is a bit brutal though, I've said it before, but things can turn out well. You just never know what's around the corner. I only messaged one woman on POF, we're going on a third date this week and every time I think about her I smile to myself, I'm really keen on her. Three weeks ago I would have laughed at myself for even thinking about this kind of thing happening, so you really never know. Happy hunting! X
No that's the thing we had plans to meet Saturday afternoon ... And the plan in place was to text her in the morning as I had plans to help a mate move some things from his flat to storage which was only going to take a couple of hours max
It turned out he didn't need my help again so I text her to let her know I could meet earlier or at the prearranged time ... And I didn't hear anything from her at all and still waiting to hear from her now I won't be holding my breath
I've decided to take a break from it all now it's starting to get me down and playing havoc with my self esteem ... So I'm gonna take some time off hit the gym hard and start to feel better about myself and then go back to it ..
Bitch! She doesn't deserve you. Has your daughter had her school prom yet?
I haven't posted on here since the early days of the thread. However, I've been a regular lurker (in a non creepy way) and enjoyed reading the ups and downs of the regulars.
Anyway, I've been a non subscription member of match for a while as I've been trying to build my confidence to get back into the dating game after a long while.
I've finally bitten the bullet and sent my first message to a girl who sparked my interest. The only thing is, it makes me so disheartened if I don't receive a reply and it knocks my confidence.
Does anybody else feel this way? I'm not in the habit of messaging loads of girls at random, and I actually took the time too read her profile properly.. I guess I'm just "sounding off" but the dating game is so hard.
Sorry forgot to add I'm sure there is nothing up with you like there isn't with anyone else on here
Here here! That has been my problem of late, thinking its all about me and that there is something fundamentally wrong with me. Fact is I am what I am, and I am trying to be happy with that - its everyone else that is wrong
I haven't posted on here since the early days of the thread. However, I've been a regular lurker (in a non creepy way) and enjoyed reading the ups and downs of the regulars.
Anyway, I've been a non subscription member of match for a while as I've been trying to build my confidence to get back into the dating game after a long while.
I've finally bitten the bullet and sent my first message to a girl who sparked my interest. The only thing is, it makes me so disheartened if I don't receive a reply and it knocks my confidence.
Does anybody else feel this way? I'm not in the habit of messaging loads of girls at random, and I actually took the time too read her profile properly.. I guess I'm just "sounding off" but the dating game is so hard.
I know the feeling, I joined POF last year and spent lots of time actively looking through profiles and selectively messaging ladies who I felt I had genuine shared interests with. Not a single reply - nothing. Really did hit me hard, so I took a break from it as it was doing me no good.
Started on there again in January and thankfully have had a bit more success. Have had a couple of brief meet-ups with a Canadian lady - have a fair bit in common but not sure at the moment; its not really developed that much yet. Never really know how long to give something before its best to part ways, we could just be better suited as friends - not sure yet.
Have a coffee meeting arranged with someone for Friday lunch, she works near to where I do so thought it would be a nice relaxed way to say hi and initially meet.
Anyway chin up, as others have said more new people join all the time and the right person could be just around the corner; and there is certainly nothing wrong with any of us!
I haven't posted on here since the early days of the thread. However, I've been a regular lurker (in a non creepy way) and enjoyed reading the ups and downs of the regulars.
Anyway, I've been a non subscription member of match for a while as I've been trying to build my confidence to get back into the dating game after a long while.
I've finally bitten the bullet and sent my first message to a girl who sparked my interest. The only thing is, it makes me so disheartened if I don't receive a reply and it knocks my confidence.
Does anybody else feel this way? I'm not in the habit of messaging loads of girls at random, and I actually took the time too read her profile properly.. I guess I'm just "sounding off" but the dating game is so hard.
Hey... welcome back.
I think its safe to say that, yes, we all get disheartened by a lack of a response the secret is how you deal with it.
I've found that like it or not, online dating is brutal and you need to develop a thick skin and not take it all so personally... I know its easier said than done but I suspect its the reason so many of us give it a go, take a break and then give it another go.
You can start by taking comfort from thinking that perhaps that lady didn't respond because she's not a paid up member if it helps.
Most of us I'm sure would actually like a thanks but no thanks and I respond to every single message I get but most people don't and most ladies don't for well documented reasons.
There's always here for letting off steam , I have it on good authority that a good rant on this thread has magical qualities and things change for a while afterwards ;-)
Bitch! She doesn't deserve you. Has your daughter had her school prom yet?
no school prom as of yet uffa its in June or July (it begins with a J anyway ;-))
the BIB ..see I know you are being nice here (and thank you ) but I hear this all the time from friends of the female variety
she don't deserve you ...her loss...they are stupid ...and when you ask them to set them up with their single friends (who constantly moan about being single which I hear about constantly from my friends) still haven't got a date through friends yet
I say what's the excuse now your pals (who they tell me are lovely gals and have no idea why they are single ) have blown me out ...I love the way they squirm in like a totally friendly way of course and there's no malice in it ...I think that's why m taking a break from it all ive just had enough of the BS maybe in a few months ill be back into it (not leaving this thread though )
no school prom as of yet uffa its in June or July (it begins with a J anyway ;-))
the BIB ..see I know you are being nice here (and thank you ) but I hear this all the time from friends of the female variety
she don't deserve you ...her loss...they are stupid ...and when you ask them to set them up with their single friends (who constantly moan about being single which I hear about constantly from my friends) still haven't got a date through friends yet
I say what's the excuse now your pals (who they tell me are lovely gals and have no idea why they are single ) have blown me out ...I love the way they squirm in like a totally friendly way of course and there's no malice in it ...I think that's why m taking a break from it all ive just had enough of the BS maybe in a few months ill be back into it (not leaving this thread though )
This is dangerous territory for people, they run the risk of losing not one but 2 friends if things don't work out. So I do understand their reluctance.
By way of illustration, a friend of mine introduced me to a friend of hers, we went out a couple of times but ultimately things didn't work out between us however she and I remain friends and on good terms but the two of them haven't spoken since the my number was passed over... they both claim to not know why and I don't push it.
This is dangerous territory for people, they run the risk of losing not one but 2 friends if things don't work out. So I do understand their reluctance.
By way of illustration, a friend of mine introduced me to a friend of hers, we went out a couple of times but ultimately things didn't work out between us however she and I remain friends and on good terms but the two of them haven't spoken since the my number was passed over... they both claim to not know why and I don't push it.
that's understandable .. but on the flip side ive never had a date where I have ended up "hating" the other person and id suspect that's a lot more to do with their friendship before the date rather than the "fall out" of the date
Comments
I dont understand what you mean? I was generalising and just saying that some have had positive dates and others havent and I hope everyone has more ups than downs.
Good luck! hope all goes well, distance never works for me but it does work for others so there is hope. I agree that there isn't many nice ones local, seems to be the same issue for a lot of people I know.
Thanks. I've been on eharmony a couple of months now, had a quite a lot of interest at first but seems to have gone completely dead recently, although I've just started talking to a couple of new men. Also giving POF a go, since it's free.[/QUOTE]
POF has improved a bit lately I think. I am so sorry you have lost your job, what a kick.... but the others are right. Try not to beat yourself up about it and certainly don't beat yourself up about it.
I've cancelled my coffee date as I've woken up with an allergic reaction so have hives on my face. Wonderful.
POF has improved a bit lately I think. I am so sorry you have lost your job, what a kick.... but the others are right. Try not to beat yourself up about it and certainly don't beat yourself up about it.
I've cancelled my coffee date as I've woken up with an allergic reaction so have hives on my face. Wonderful.[/QUOTE]
Cheers. Feeling better today, think it was just the initial disappointment on top of everything else that got to me.
That sounds awful, hope you get better soon!
Long-time lurker and (very!) occasional poster
Still keep up with all your news on here and am always pleased to hear when people have had good dates. Also full of sympathy for everyone who is having dating/job/any other problems at the moment- hope things soon improve for you all
I'm having a wallow and feeling sorry for myself at the moment as literally not a single man I have messaged on POF recently has messaged me back And I promise I do make an effort and don't just write "Hi, how are you?" ! So I've convinced myself I'm hideous and unlovable
Hope other people are having better luck!
Nobody is hideous and unlovable, POF is cyclical and new people join all the time. The person who fancies the arse off you might join tomorrow or next week! Online dating is a bit brutal though, I've said it before, but things can turn out well. You just never know what's around the corner. I only messaged one woman on POF, we're going on a third date this week and every time I think about her I smile to myself, I'm really keen on her. Three weeks ago I would have laughed at myself for even thinking about this kind of thing happening, so you really never know. Happy hunting! X
Thank you I know you're right really, was just feeling sorry for myself!
That's lovely to hear; good luck for your third date, hope it goes as well as the first two!
I went on my date last night and got on well she was really nervous though and I had to take the lead of conversation quite a bit as she looked a bit like a rabbit in headlights. Went to Harvester lol had a nice meal and took down each others numbers. She seems really nice, we have some things in common and may meet up again.
I see it as they have missed out on dating you, its their loss. Keep trying at the dating and one day a man will message you back try not to get too down about it. I remember going a whole year without any girl messaging me back so I gave up then out of the blue I had someone message me and we went on a date. Keep your chin up something will happen.
That's just bad form if she's agreed to meet at a place at a specific time, and then doesn't turn up without properly canceling.
But how do you know for sure she wasn't on her way? For some of my first meetings I usually arrange a few days in advance and we may not confirm the day of or the day before. I am usually pretty nervous that they won't turn up in those cases, but I usually don't organize places too far away.
To be fair I'm sure she would have said "where are you", which I'm assuming she didn't. Booooooooo to her
KitKat,
I'm sure there's more to this, but if you got fired for solely for having sinus issues (which could have been fixed by an operation - meaning your performance would also improve), there is potentially an HR issue.
No that's the thing we had plans to meet Saturday afternoon ... And the plan in place was to text her in the morning as I had plans to help a mate move some things from his flat to storage which was only going to take a couple of hours max
It turned out he didn't need my help again so I text her to let her know I could meet earlier or at the prearranged time ... And I didn't hear anything from her at all and still waiting to hear from her now I won't be holding my breath
I've decided to take a break from it all now it's starting to get me down and playing havoc with my self esteem ... So I'm gonna take some time off hit the gym hard and start to feel better about myself and then go back to it ..
Hi,
Technically I was still on a probation period so I don't think there is much I can do but thank you for the reply.
Still trying to meet new people but not a lot happening right now. Usually goes through quiet spells though so still hopeful!
Thank you I will keep my chin up; I know everyone on here has had similar (or much worse!) experiences but it's just a matter of perseverance
Bitch! She doesn't deserve you. Has your daughter had her school prom yet?
Anyway, I've been a non subscription member of match for a while as I've been trying to build my confidence to get back into the dating game after a long while.
I've finally bitten the bullet and sent my first message to a girl who sparked my interest. The only thing is, it makes me so disheartened if I don't receive a reply and it knocks my confidence.
Does anybody else feel this way? I'm not in the habit of messaging loads of girls at random, and I actually took the time too read her profile properly.. I guess I'm just "sounding off" but the dating game is so hard.
Here here! That has been my problem of late, thinking its all about me and that there is something fundamentally wrong with me. Fact is I am what I am, and I am trying to be happy with that - its everyone else that is wrong
I know the feeling, I joined POF last year and spent lots of time actively looking through profiles and selectively messaging ladies who I felt I had genuine shared interests with. Not a single reply - nothing. Really did hit me hard, so I took a break from it as it was doing me no good.
Started on there again in January and thankfully have had a bit more success. Have had a couple of brief meet-ups with a Canadian lady - have a fair bit in common but not sure at the moment; its not really developed that much yet. Never really know how long to give something before its best to part ways, we could just be better suited as friends - not sure yet.
Have a coffee meeting arranged with someone for Friday lunch, she works near to where I do so thought it would be a nice relaxed way to say hi and initially meet.
Anyway chin up, as others have said more new people join all the time and the right person could be just around the corner; and there is certainly nothing wrong with any of us!
Hey... welcome back.
I think its safe to say that, yes, we all get disheartened by a lack of a response the secret is how you deal with it.
I've found that like it or not, online dating is brutal and you need to develop a thick skin and not take it all so personally... I know its easier said than done but I suspect its the reason so many of us give it a go, take a break and then give it another go.
You can start by taking comfort from thinking that perhaps that lady didn't respond because she's not a paid up member if it helps.
Most of us I'm sure would actually like a thanks but no thanks and I respond to every single message I get but most people don't and most ladies don't for well documented reasons.
There's always here for letting off steam , I have it on good authority that a good rant on this thread has magical qualities and things change for a while afterwards ;-)
no school prom as of yet uffa its in June or July (it begins with a J anyway ;-))
the BIB ..see I know you are being nice here (and thank you ) but I hear this all the time from friends of the female variety
she don't deserve you ...her loss...they are stupid ...and when you ask them to set them up with their single friends (who constantly moan about being single which I hear about constantly from my friends) still haven't got a date through friends yet
I say what's the excuse now your pals (who they tell me are lovely gals and have no idea why they are single ) have blown me out ...I love the way they squirm in like a totally friendly way of course and there's no malice in it ...I think that's why m taking a break from it all ive just had enough of the BS maybe in a few months ill be back into it (not leaving this thread though )
This is dangerous territory for people, they run the risk of losing not one but 2 friends if things don't work out. So I do understand their reluctance.
By way of illustration, a friend of mine introduced me to a friend of hers, we went out a couple of times but ultimately things didn't work out between us however she and I remain friends and on good terms but the two of them haven't spoken since the my number was passed over... they both claim to not know why and I don't push it.
that's understandable .. but on the flip side ive never had a date where I have ended up "hating" the other person and id suspect that's a lot more to do with their friendship before the date rather than the "fall out" of the date