Why does he think that eye contact is the solution to all the world's problems? When he says "Don't move your eyes from my/your dad's/XYZ's face for a second" I feel like yelling WHO ARE YOU TO DICTATE WHERE PEOPLE'S EYES GO? LET THEM LOOK WHEREVER THEY LIKE!
Caught the end of this morning's show where he was talking to a woman who had been nearly killed by her former lover. Lover now in prison, but comes out in January. Woman is terrified, and has turned her home into a fortress, dreading the day of his release.
Jeremy spouts a lot of guff about how the show will do what they can to support her and then says the immortal phrase..........
"the important thing is - you came on the show."
:eek:
So a woman is living in fear of her life but the IMPORTANT thing is that she has appeared on the Jeremy (it's my name on the wall ladeez and gennlemen) Kyle show!!!!
Did you know that our Jezza apparently has a soft side?
Yes, ladies and gentlemen, it's true. Apparently Dr Statham Crazy Frog Hoppity-Hop Persian Slippers Kyle likes nothing better than watching Pretty Woman with a tub of Haagen Dazs of an evening.
Doesn't he realise that Julia Roberts' character is prostitute SCUM, and that SITTING ON HIS BACKSIDE eating ice-cream will make him OBESE, ladies and gentlemen?
*pops up with big smiley smile on mush* (got George Michael tix this morning!! : )
but now going into sad mode..........
looks like I missed a right cracker of a Trisha show :mad:
TISSUES WILL!!!!
and I have to say that I was in awe of that woman, Melody, who hated her murderer brother - she was actually INTELLIGENT and could used words of more than two syllables in a meaningful and constructive sentence :eek:
I think Jez was secretly a bit worried in case she showed him up *nods head* - she wasn't coming out with any random expressions or words used out of context - all she said made complete sense.
but as you all say, he hasn't got the right "technique" or experience to deal with people that DO have serious relationship issues and familial problems.
It's all very easy for him to go off on one because SHE IS PREGNANT YOUNG MAN, and HE IS OFF HIS CAKE ON WEED AND SPECIAL BREW AND IS THEREFORE A LAZY SCUMBAG, WHO THE TAXPAYERS ARE KEEPING IN HIS LIFESTYLE, because basically, as much as I hate to have to admit it, he's right - and he bloody well knows it - so he won't have to barter for the audience/public appreciation, as he knows he has won it already.
When it is people who are really dealing with intensely painful and permanent situations in their private life, he CANNOT rant and rave and lickety spit - but, cannot apply any sympathetic attitude, as we can't take Mr Rantathon seriously.......
I dunno what I prefer......
Jezzy shouting at polyester "leisure suited" chav girls with their hair pulled back so tight it looks painted on and 19 earrings the size of funfair Hoopla rings stuffed in every visible orifice (not to mention the "all moving parts" clown chain ) fighting with equally chavvy boyf etc (you know the score )
or Jezzy trying to be Anthony Clare
and failing miserably.......
long pause whilst thinking realllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllly hard about the choices involved......
There, there, Grems - She means nothing to him. He didn't wear a condom and she trapped him. When Gray and I were on our way to a seedy motel for half an hour yesterday, Jezz said "Oi, Mels, tell Grems I'll see her in her dreams...the foxy madam
Did you know that our Jezza apparently has a soft side?
Yes, ladies and gentlemen, it's true. Apparently Dr Statham Crazy Frog Hoppity-Hop Persian Slippers Kyle likes nothing better than watching Pretty Woman with a tub of Haagen Dazs of an evening.
Doesn't he realise that Julia Roberts' character is prostitute SCUM, and that SITTING ON HIS BACKSIDE eating ice-cream will make him OBESE, ladies and gentlemen?
Hi all !
OMG ! This has tainted the Jezza!!!..I'M IN BITS..!HASN'T HE GOT ANYTHING ELSE TO DO... OH YES SAVE A KID ...GET TO BOOTCAMP !! Do you think Grah and Gaz shares his ice cream... ?(smilies not working AGAIN)
*pops up with big smiley smile on mush* (got George Michael tix this morning!! : )
but now going into sad mode..........
looks like I missed a right cracker of a Trisha show :mad:
TISSUES WILL!!!!
and I have to say that I was in awe of that woman, Melody, who hated her murderer brother - she was actually INTELLIGENT and could used words of more than two syllables in a meaningful and constructive sentence :eek:
I think Jez was secretly a bit worried in case she showed him up *nods head* - she wasn't coming out with any random expressions or words used out of context - all she said made complete sense.
but as you all say, he hasn't got the right "technique" or experience to deal with people that DO have serious relationship issues and familial problems.
It's all very easy for him to go off on one because SHE IS PREGNANT YOUNG MAN, and HE IS OFF HIS CAKE ON WEED AND SPECIAL BREW AND IS THEREFORE A LAZY SCUMBAG, WHO THE TAXPAYERS ARE KEEPING IN HIS LIFESTYLE, because basically, as much as I hate to have to admit it, he's right - and he bloody well knows it - so he won't have to barter for the audience/public appreciation, as he knows he has won it already.
When it is people who are really dealing with intensely painful and permanent situations in their private life, he CANNOT rant and rave and lickety spit - but, cannot apply any sympathetic attitude, as we can't take Mr Rantathon seriously.......
I dunno what I prefer......
Jezzy shouting at polyester "leisure suited" chav girls with their hair pulled back so tight it looks painted on and 19 earrings the size of funfair Hoopla rings stuffed in every visible orifice (not to mention the "all moving parts" clown chain ) fighting with equally chavvy boyf etc (you know the score )
or Jezzy trying to be Anthony Clare
and failing miserably.......
long pause whilst thinking realllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllly hard about the choices involved......
YES!!! I KNOW!!!!
I PREFER THE CHAVSTERS!!!!!!!
:eek:
Weed(shortens name Jezza style).. Great post ! You lucky B*****D fot GM tickets!!!... What about us all trying to get tickets for???????? THE JEREMY KYLE SHOW LADIES AND GENTLEMAN! ewww
Oh god the Chavier the better, nothing sinks my heart more than when JK does his serious face and tells us that the show will be people trying to find long lost loved ones.
Oh god the Chavier the better, nothing sinks my heart more than when JK does his serious face and tells us that the show will be people trying to find long lost loved ones.
Hi LV, Do hope next week will supply lots of chavtastic tv!
Oh dear Lord, I've just had a horrible thought. You could actually swap Jeremy Kyle with Richard Madeley and nobody - not even Judy - would notice the difference. They are both ranty, self-obsessed, pontificating arses who think the entire programme is about THEM, they both shout over their guests and patronise.
Oh dear Lord, I've just had a horrible thought. You could actually swap Jeremy Kyle with Richard Madeley and nobody - not even Judy - would notice the difference. They are both ranty, self-obsessed, pontificating arses who think the entire programme is about THEM, they both shout over their guests and patronise.
Me too Louismum.....it's so creepy and controlling isn't it? Why the hell does it matter whether people sit back or perch forward? It's just another way of showing everyone that he's in charge, HE gets to dictate how people sit, as well as where they look ("Don't let your eyes leave my face for a second!"). Interestingly, if someone comes on and sits back all relaxed in their chair, JK then goes to the opposite extreme and orders them to "sit up straight". Which just goes to prove he doesn't really mind how people sit; he just wants to establish that he's in control. BRRRR!
Sorry, but I'm not going to read 51 pages to check whether or not this has been said before but it really irritates the hell out of me when he reads the phone number out:
"It's 0901....it's 30 50 60"
:mad: :mad: :mad: and one more for being so damn irritating that I actually know the friggin' number! :mad:
Well I'm sorry but it irritates the hell out of me when we've been absolutely hillarious and you can't be bothered to read it. Frankly YOU ARE A DISGRACE. And probably smoke crack-cocaine.
I`ve only just found this thread and hope you don`t mind if I jump in quickly because I AM IN TURMOIL!
I`m another who is horribly fascinated by The Jeremy Kyle Show.
Has anyone mentioned yet, how, whenever there is an ahem "problem child" on, he`ll say something like "you don`t know why he/she is behaving like this do you? But I DO. IT`S NOT ROCKET SCIENCE"
I felt really angry and uncomfortable, when on the show where you had that poor couple whose children had commited suicide, breaking their hearts whilst talking about it, "sensitive" Jeremy turned to camera and audience and said "the first thing I`m going to do after this show, is phone my children"
I`m sure that Mother, sobbing her heart out, really needed to know that!
Sorry, rant over.
Got to go and walk the dog, but thanks all of you for a brilliant thread.
It`s had me in stitches. :cool:
Me too Louismum.....it's so creepy and controlling isn't it? Why the hell does it matter whether people sit back or perch forward? It's just another way of showing everyone that he's in charge, HE gets to dictate how people sit, as well as where they look ("Don't let your eyes leave my face for a second!"). Interestingly, if someone comes on and sits back all relaxed in their chair, JK then goes to the opposite extreme and orders them to "sit up straight". Which just goes to prove he doesn't really mind how people sit; he just wants to establish that he's in control. BRRRR!
I think he tells them to sit back so they don't block camera angles. As for sitting up striaght that's just when teens come on and slouch in the chair.
Comments
imo though, he can be ott, but i like the show and he says things others like trisha wouldnt dare say.
Jeremy spouts a lot of guff about how the show will do what they can to support her and then says the immortal phrase..........
"the important thing is - you came on the show."
So a woman is living in fear of her life but the IMPORTANT thing is that she has appeared on the Jeremy (it's my name on the wall ladeez and gennlemen) Kyle show!!!!
You genius. I totally forgot about that.
Oh hang on...it's almost finished.
I did hear a 'look at me'there though
Did you know that our Jezza apparently has a soft side?
Yes, ladies and gentlemen, it's true. Apparently Dr Statham Crazy Frog Hoppity-Hop Persian Slippers Kyle likes nothing better than watching Pretty Woman with a tub of Haagen Dazs of an evening.
The proof is in this article
Doesn't he realise that Julia Roberts' character is prostitute SCUM, and that SITTING ON HIS BACKSIDE eating ice-cream will make him OBESE, ladies and gentlemen?
Hes mine i tells ya...mine!!!!!!!
mwuahahahahahahahah
but now going into sad mode..........
looks like I missed a right cracker of a Trisha show
TISSUES WILL!!!!
and I have to say that I was in awe of that woman, Melody, who hated her murderer brother
I think Jez was secretly a bit worried in case she showed him up *nods head* - she wasn't coming out with any random expressions or words used out of context - all she said made complete sense.
but as you all say, he hasn't got the right "technique" or experience to deal with people that DO have serious relationship issues and familial problems.
It's all very easy for him to go off on one because SHE IS PREGNANT YOUNG MAN, and HE IS OFF HIS CAKE ON WEED AND SPECIAL BREW AND IS THEREFORE A LAZY SCUMBAG, WHO THE TAXPAYERS ARE KEEPING IN HIS LIFESTYLE, because basically, as much as I hate to have to admit it, he's right - and he bloody well knows it - so he won't have to barter for the audience/public appreciation, as he knows he has won it already.
When it is people who are really dealing with intensely painful and permanent situations in their private life, he CANNOT rant and rave and lickety spit - but, cannot apply any sympathetic attitude, as we can't take Mr Rantathon seriously.......
I dunno what I prefer......
Jezzy shouting at polyester "leisure suited" chav girls with their hair pulled back so tight it looks painted on and 19 earrings the size of funfair Hoopla rings stuffed in every visible orifice (not to mention the "all moving parts" clown chain
or Jezzy trying to be Anthony Clare
and failing miserably.......
long pause whilst thinking realllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllly hard about the choices involved......
YES!!! I KNOW!!!!
I PREFER THE CHAVSTERS!!!!!!!
:eek:
There, there, Grems - She means nothing to him. He didn't wear a condom and she trapped him. When Gray and I were on our way to a seedy motel for half an hour yesterday, Jezz said "Oi, Mels, tell Grems I'll see her in her dreams...the foxy madam
OMG ! This has tainted the Jezza!!!..I'M IN BITS..!HASN'T HE GOT ANYTHING ELSE TO DO... OH YES SAVE A KID ...GET TO BOOTCAMP !! Do you think Grah and Gaz shares his ice cream... ?(smilies not working AGAIN)
:
Chavtastic
Hi LV, Do hope next week will supply lots of chavtastic tv!
Or can we call it Jezztastic TV?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f3mXaATLeRM
Honestly the clip is very funny the lizards what they say! So apt!
Brilliant !!!!!!
Really apt isnt it! Great
I rest my case.
Thats soooo true lol
I hate it when he 'orders' people to SIT BACK
Me too Louismum.....it's so creepy and controlling isn't it? Why the hell does it matter whether people sit back or perch forward? It's just another way of showing everyone that he's in charge, HE gets to dictate how people sit, as well as where they look ("Don't let your eyes leave my face for a second!"). Interestingly, if someone comes on and sits back all relaxed in their chair, JK then goes to the opposite extreme and orders them to "sit up straight". Which just goes to prove he doesn't really mind how people sit; he just wants to establish that he's in control. BRRRR!
"It's 0901....it's 30 50 60"
:mad: :mad: :mad: and one more for being so damn irritating that I actually know the friggin' number! :mad:
I`m another who is horribly fascinated by The Jeremy Kyle Show.
Has anyone mentioned yet, how, whenever there is an ahem "problem child" on, he`ll say something like "you don`t know why he/she is behaving like this do you? But I DO. IT`S NOT ROCKET SCIENCE"
I felt really angry and uncomfortable, when on the show where you had that poor couple whose children had commited suicide, breaking their hearts whilst talking about it, "sensitive" Jeremy turned to camera and audience and said "the first thing I`m going to do after this show, is phone my children"
I`m sure that Mother, sobbing her heart out, really needed to know that!
Sorry, rant over.
Got to go and walk the dog, but thanks all of you for a brilliant thread.
It`s had me in stitches. :cool:
I think he tells them to sit back so they don't block camera angles. As for sitting up striaght that's just when teens come on and slouch in the chair.