Put the iron on a small table, crawled under table to plug iron in, got flex wrapped around foot somehow, and pulled iron down onto my head, pointed end first (may be the only person to have an iron land on their head outside of a cartoon )
Narrowly avoided an electric shock after sticking a metal fork into a toaster to unstick a bit of toast, with the toaster still turned on (and yes, I was an adult at the time )
Mucking about a policeman's truncheon (no, that's not a euphemism!) when at work (for the police), managed to somehow hit myself in the face with it and give myself a black eye
Not me but my dad: had been sent to the blacksmiths to have a knife welded (he's a Maori, they live in the dark ages ) age 10 or so, brining hit home decides to test I'd it's still hot (after having be warned it was) so taps it against his lips :O ended up with blisters galore and still had a healthy fear or knives and hot things until his dying day
My grandad was also riding along on his bike when his brothers decided to pull a string taught across his path, but the got the height wrong and caught him under the neck, lifting him off his bike and nearly garrotting him (not his own stupidity I suppose, unless you count trusting his brothers)
I was far more cautious as a child, the only things I've done are surfing related, and not stupidity related really. Unless you count diving head first into the sea and popping up to meet my board head on.
Put the iron on a small table, crawled under table to plug iron in, got flex wrapped around foot somehow, and pulled iron down onto my head, pointed end first (may be the only person to have an iron land on their head outside of a cartoon )
Narrowly avoided an electric shock after sticking a metal fork into a toaster to unstick a bit of toast, with the toaster still turned on (and yes, I was an adult at the time )
Mucking about a policeman's truncheon (no, that's not a euphemism!) when at work (for the police), managed to somehow hit myself in the face with it and give myself a black eye
Ha ha, these all make me chuckle. Sorry!
Reminds me of my mum (gosh what an idiotic family I come from, should really find out if I was adopted ) who was taking a top off and got her arm trapped (no idea how) and it sprang out and gave her a black eye. Again, no idea how she did it, but she looked like a beaten woman for ages!
I jumped from a 10 feet high concrete level to the ground while standing on it, it was my curiosity to see what happens if we jump... and was egged on by others saying nothing will happen ... I jumped and I landed straight on my feet, and i felt a bad jerk in my knees. enough to keep me standstill there only for a few minutes till I felt like moving again.
I also stapled my thumb out of curiosity to see whether my thumb is strong enough or not.. went thru the skin by half and I bled.
When I was about 8 I had a pencil rubber that was half pink half grey. I wondered what it looked like inside so decided to cut it in half with my mums sharpest kitchen knife.....knife slipped and I cut halfway through my finger. Stupid thing was I knew how dangerous it was and what the consequences would be if I slipped but my curiosity got the better of me.
Tried to prune a hedge by standing on the roof of my car, slipped and fell on my arse, then slipped down windscreen, slipped off the bonnet and then onto floor with a bump. Massive bruise and dented roof.
Tried to clean the skylight of my conservatory with a ladder that was just too short and I tried to reach but ladder then slipped out from under me, left me hanging onto skylight by my fingers which couldn't hold my weight and I ended up crashing onto the dining room table then onto the floor. Massive bruising and damanged dining table.
Tried to reach for something under the ironing board, knocked the board and iron fell on my head. Bruising to head.
Tried to squeeze past 2 trees on a quad bike, clipped the tree with the back wheel, did an Ozzie Osbourne and flipped the bike which then flipped me and I crash landed. Bruising to my arms and cracked the quad bike.
Tried to freewheel down parliament hill on my new bike, no brakes, when i realised that not breaking was a bad idea it was too late, went down a ditch, then went up and up and up. Got thrown about 50 feet. Severe concussion, and bent wheels on the bike.
Was trying a new "kama sutra" position. Next thing I know I was in massive agony and couldn't walk. Turned out I damaged my sciatic nerve. Although I had to tell people I fell off a horse.....so to speak....
There is so much more but I'll give you all a break from pissing yourselves with laughter.
About 2 years ago I decided to try hubby's safety razor ( you know, the old fashioned type that you have to put razor blades in) to shave my legs as I had run out of my disposable ones.
I always shave in the shower, so................the right leg presented no problem, a lovely smooth leg so onto my left leg..........all fine until I started on just above my heel, on the back of my leg :eek:
A close shave doesn't adequately describe it!
I felt no pain at all but the shower filling with blood was an indication I had truly f****d up!
I was alone in the house (hubby works abroad) and my first reaction was how to stop the blood flow..............grabbed the towel and applied pressure and limped from the shower..............blood everywhere as I couldn't apply enough pressure to stop the bleed!
Next step was to bandage the area.............The bleed was so bad that plasters wouldn't suffice so ended up tearing up a clean sheet and utilising that.
3 Days later, my daughter visited me from Nottingham ( a qualified staff nurse) and spent over 40 minutes soaking and cutting off the makeshift bandage, along with a considerable amount of my damaged skin, to reveal a 4'' scar that I still bear.
When she examined her dad's razor, there was a huge scraping of my skin :eek::eek:
Burnt the end of my finger off (the skin anyway) after I pressed a car cigarette lighter, took it out and tried to press it in again from the other end. I was only 6.
Put the iron on a small table, crawled under table to plug iron in, got flex wrapped around foot somehow, and pulled iron down onto my head, pointed end first (may be the only person to have an iron land on their head outside of a cartoon )
I've had loads of minor ones but thankfully never any that have caused a serious injury.
I've trapped my finger in a car door after slamming it during a row with my boyfriend. It was dark, so I felt the blood before I saw it ( a good thing ). I had to use tweezers to pick part of my cuticle out of a cut.
When I was about 8 I was walking a long a brick wall when one leg slipped. Both legs slid down the sides and I had massive grazes both on both legs from knee to thigh top.
Drunkenly making myself a salami baguette, holding bread in hand to cut it open with massive breadknife...yeah, that didn't end well.
Was heating up an espresso in the microwave, couldn't gauge how hot it was when it came out, so stuck my tongue in it ...didn't end well.
Fell off a trampoline in my neighbour's garden at 4am on the way home from a party. My ankle looked like a football.
Fell off a kid's mini skateboard going down the steepest hill in my village, again, on the way home from a party. Gravel burns all up my arm and my other ankle like a football.
Mucking about a policeman's truncheon (no, that's not a euphemism!) when at work (for the police), managed to somehow hit myself in the face with it and give myself a black eye
You should worry, I'm Smiley Culture and I somehow stabbed myself to death while having a friendly chat with the local constabulary.
I was stripping some wallpaper for a mate once without a steamer, which naturally meant having to put some welly into it. But I was a bit overzealous with the scraper and my hand slipped, making me stab myself on the bridge of my nose. A couple of millimetres further across and I could have had my eye out.
.....Tried to help my Dad by fetching his soldering iron - still plugged in and I grabbed the hot end. :eek:
Similar story from me. Doing some soldering, placed soldering iron on the table before moving on to the next solder job. Hot iron slipped from the table, reflex action was to grab it as it fell - and you guessed it - caught the hot end in my hand....:eek:
Comments
Narrowly avoided an electric shock after sticking a metal fork into a toaster to unstick a bit of toast, with the toaster still turned on
Mucking about a policeman's truncheon (no, that's not a euphemism!) when at work (for the police), managed to somehow hit myself in the face with it and give myself a black eye
My grandad was also riding along on his bike when his brothers decided to pull a string taught across his path, but the got the height wrong and caught him under the neck, lifting him off his bike and nearly garrotting him
I was far more cautious as a child, the only things I've done are surfing related, and not stupidity related really. Unless you count diving head first into the sea and popping up to meet my board head on.
Ha ha, these all make me chuckle. Sorry!
Reminds me of my mum (gosh what an idiotic family I come from, should really find out if I was adopted
I also stapled my thumb out of curiosity to see whether my thumb is strong enough or not.. went thru the skin by half and I bled.
I had an ancient Remington electric razor, ooooh, how does this work I wondered.
With my trusty screwdriver, I removed the case and plugged the mains lead into the bottom.
As it started to buzz and vibrate I picked it up to have a closer look.
Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzt :eek: my arm went completely numb.
I've since stopped taking things apart.
Took a pasta shell out of boiling water to see if it was cooked, bit into it and the water inside spilled out and burnt my lip.
Tried to prune a hedge by standing on the roof of my car, slipped and fell on my arse, then slipped down windscreen, slipped off the bonnet and then onto floor with a bump. Massive bruise and dented roof.
Tried to clean the skylight of my conservatory with a ladder that was just too short and I tried to reach but ladder then slipped out from under me, left me hanging onto skylight by my fingers which couldn't hold my weight and I ended up crashing onto the dining room table then onto the floor. Massive bruising and damanged dining table.
Tried to reach for something under the ironing board, knocked the board and iron fell on my head. Bruising to head.
Tried to squeeze past 2 trees on a quad bike, clipped the tree with the back wheel, did an Ozzie Osbourne and flipped the bike which then flipped me and I crash landed. Bruising to my arms and cracked the quad bike.
Tried to freewheel down parliament hill on my new bike, no brakes, when i realised that not breaking was a bad idea it was too late, went down a ditch, then went up and up and up. Got thrown about 50 feet. Severe concussion, and bent wheels on the bike.
Was trying a new "kama sutra" position. Next thing I know I was in massive agony and couldn't walk. Turned out I damaged my sciatic nerve. Although I had to tell people I fell off a horse.....so to speak....
There is so much more but I'll give you all a break from pissing yourselves with laughter.
I always shave in the shower, so................the right leg presented no problem, a lovely smooth leg so onto my left leg..........all fine until I started on just above my heel, on the back of my leg :eek:
A close shave doesn't adequately describe it!
I felt no pain at all but the shower filling with blood was an indication I had truly f****d up!
I was alone in the house (hubby works abroad) and my first reaction was how to stop the blood flow..............grabbed the towel and applied pressure and limped from the shower..............blood everywhere as I couldn't apply enough pressure to stop the bleed!
Next step was to bandage the area.............The bleed was so bad that plasters wouldn't suffice so ended up tearing up a clean sheet and utilising that.
3 Days later, my daughter visited me from Nottingham ( a qualified staff nurse) and spent over 40 minutes soaking and cutting off the makeshift bandage, along with a considerable amount of my damaged skin, to reveal a 4'' scar that I still bear.
When she examined her dad's razor, there was a huge scraping of my skin :eek::eek:
Looks like it is more common than we think
I've trapped my finger in a car door after slamming it during a row with my boyfriend. It was dark, so I felt the blood before I saw it ( a good thing ). I had to use tweezers to pick part of my cuticle out of a cut.
When I was about 8 I was walking a long a brick wall when one leg slipped. Both legs slid down the sides and I had massive grazes both on both legs from knee to thigh top.
Did they lose any sight?
Thankfully not, but they ended up at Moorfields eye hospital and it was a lucky escape.
Was heating up an espresso in the microwave, couldn't gauge how hot it was when it came out, so stuck my tongue in it ...didn't end well.
Fell off a trampoline in my neighbour's garden at 4am on the way home from a party. My ankle looked like a football.
Fell off a kid's mini skateboard going down the steepest hill in my village, again, on the way home from a party. Gravel burns all up my arm and my other ankle like a football.
I'm a liability really.
phew. good to hear
You should worry, I'm Smiley Culture and I somehow stabbed myself to death while having a friendly chat with the local constabulary.
Didn't turn off the bacon slicer in the deli where I worked then started cleaning it - thumb severely sliced.
Wasn't looking whilst chopping apples - sliced top of thumb off.
I'm surprised I still have thumbs!
Tried to catch a dart when someone threw it - ended up with it buried in my finger
Stuck my fingers in socket of a bedside lamp whilst it was plugged in - it threw me across the room.
Tried to help my Dad by fetching his soldering iron - still plugged in and I grabbed the hot end. :eek:
Similar story from me. Doing some soldering, placed soldering iron on the table before moving on to the next solder job. Hot iron slipped from the table, reflex action was to grab it as it fell - and you guessed it - caught the hot end in my hand....:eek: