Weird places you've had How's your Father?

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  • SurferfishSurferfish Posts: 7,659
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    madlh100 wrote: »
    Has anyone ever had a tit wank?

    I was baffled to the hills when I was asked to give someone one.

    You place your willy between the boobs and go up and down.

    I wouldn't recommend it. Just lead to an argument over whether my cock was too small or her boobs were shit.


    Just be damn grateful she never asked you for a chili dog!!

    http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=chili%20dog

    :eek: :eek: :eek:
  • CharnhamCharnham Posts: 61,148
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    why is it there are so many differnt types of scat related sex act, when just 1 is more than enough?
  • MrMarpleMrMarple Posts: 3,424
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    madlh100 wrote: »
    Has anyone ever had a tit wank?

    I was baffled to the hills when I was asked to give someone one.

    You place your willy between the boobs and go up and down.

    I wouldn't recommend it. Just lead to an argument over whether my cock was too small or her boobs were shit.

    Post of the month?
    Gotta be!! :D:D:D
  • Agent KrycekAgent Krycek Posts: 39,269
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    Can someone explain why graveyards are so popular? :eek:

    When you're young, nowhere else to go, and needs must... :o

    Oh god, just thought of another one, somewhere in the world, on a station platform, very drunk, platform not quite as empty as we thought, and yes, we forgot about CCTV etc and no, I am never, ever, ever, ever visiting that location again :o:o:o (thankfully a long time ago and way before the days of youtube :o )
  • Bedsit BobBedsit Bob Posts: 24,344
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    madlh100 wrote: »
    Has anyone ever had a tit wank?

    Yes. See Post 44.
    I was baffled to the hills when I was asked to give someone one.

    Men receive them. They don't give them.
  • scorpygal1scorpygal1 Posts: 211
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    johnF1971 wrote: »
    Just be damn grateful she never asked you for a chili dog!!

    http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=chili%20dog

    :eek: :eek: :eek:

    :eek: :eek: :eek:
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 2,761
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    tit wanks are ridiculous ! :p
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 516
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    The ramblers of Almeria, Spain. me & the OH came back from the pub very drunk and he'd forgotten his key and his parents were out, so we just went and did it out in the open... my foot was bleeding, there was grit all over our elbows and knees and we met his parents walking back and they were wiping grass off his back while I made the excuses about falling over ;) which isn't unlikely for me, but no-one bought it. His mother tended to my bleeding foot and me and the OH toddled off to bed and picked up where we left off! Very, very good night :D
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 216
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    On the White Cliffs of Dover :D
  • madlh100madlh100 Posts: 9,893
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    helenj1986 wrote: »
    tit wanks are ridiculous ! :p

    That's exactly what was going through my mind at the time.

    Another mate of mine was in the room at the same time and said that she had small tits.
    Bedsit Bob wrote: »
    Yes. See Post 44.



    Men receive them. They don't give them.

    How do men receive them? When I gave one, she was lying on the floor.
  • RAINBOWGIRL22RAINBOWGIRL22 Posts: 24,459
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    madlh100 wrote: »
    Has anyone ever had a tit wank?

    I was baffled to the hills when I was asked to give someone one.

    You place your willy between the boobs and go up and down.

    I wouldn't recommend it. Just lead to an argument over whether my cock was too small or her boobs were shit.

    I think it was your willy mad - it seems to have a tendency to slip out if things - no? :eek:
    johnF1971 wrote: »
    Just be damn grateful she never asked you for a chili dog!!

    http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=chili%20dog

    :eek: :eek: :eek:

    Seriously the stuff I learn on here is scary :o Just after I met my OH (I am talking real early day) I learnt the terms "donkey punch" and "dirty sanchez" :eek:
    I found it all very fascinating of course and proceeed to tell him all about my new DS discovey... I am surprised he didn't run for the hills to be honest :p
  • Bedsit BobBedsit Bob Posts: 24,344
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    madlh100 wrote: »
    How do men receive them?

    Men receive a wank from their female partner.

    They don't give their female partner a wank, do they?
  • RAINBOWGIRL22RAINBOWGIRL22 Posts: 24,459
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    madlh100 wrote: »
    That's exactly what was going through my mind at the time.

    Another mate of mine was in the room at the same time and said that she had small tits.



    How do men receive them? When I gave one, she was lying on the floor.

    I just do not know where to even begin with this Mad :eek:

    Logistically her laying on the floor and you standing over her with your mate watching isn't the tit wank position of choice :eek:
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 6,138
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    I've also done it at the back of a gym but I guess that's not very 'weird'.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 2,761
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    You got a titwank while your friend was watching?! was this some kind of threesome?! Did he have a go next?!
  • FlufanFlufan Posts: 2,544
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    All this talk keeps making me think that it's Friday already!
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 1,734
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    Oh, I say, this threads a bit steamy for this time of day isn't it :o
  • FlufanFlufan Posts: 2,544
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    madlh100 wrote: »
    How do men receive them? When I gave one, she was lying on the floor.

    In that case, you received one.

    Unless you rummaging in her bosom valley with your todger was so erotic for her that she came.

    Not to put too fine a point on it, the "tit" in "titwank" refers to what is used for the act and not to what is, in grammatical terms, the object of the verb.
  • ackeracker Posts: 8,809
    Forum Member
    Over the freezer....banned from that supermarket now. I like the old ones.
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