This is in your opinion only isn't it?
As I'm glad you're not my support worker ,believe me working with people with addictions and telling them they have an illness and working with them with kindness does work,but only when they want to help themselves
Telling them to "cop on" and tough love would have pushed me back into drinking so I think that you have to realise is that these are just your opinions and there's nothing better than a support worker or doctor that understands you and tells you that this is a illness but as long as the person addicted to what ever it is wants to help themselves and realises they have a problem then you are on the right path,
Dianiella knows what she needs to do and the case here if she's still taking it is that she hasn't put in the work to get to step one again when she gets to a meeting and realises she's powerless over drugs and once she's back on that first step she's got the tools to start getting clean again,and someone telling her to pull herself together would definitely make her go even more to drugs,
Addictive people aren't criminals why should people with addictions be treated like you say? Everyone deserves love and kindness and it is a disease- a cunning,baffling and powerful one but you can have a reprieve from it one day at a time IF you want to help yourself,
Lovely post, Ella.
In this instance, I can understand why people have no sympathy for Danielle as she's plainly not taking responsibility for herself. If she were, she'd be in rehab now, not doing the tabloid and chatshow rounds. But having little sympathy for her at the moment is not the same thing as not having empathy for someone who struggles with addiction. But only she can turn things around and at the moment, that seems low on her priorities, hence the reaction she's getting.
Missed it. What was the upshot? She still on it now, then?
She's in America - back in therapy and to her church. She was in an awful state and crying during much of the interview. Her looks have gone and she seemed like a lost cause. Hopefully she can turn her life around but I tend to think she needs to do it in private rather than always craving the limelight.
I watched the interview and felt really sorry for, she seemed to have reached a real low in her life. I wish her all the best in her recovery and hopes she gets clean and stays clean
Give the poor woman a break. She had a really severe drug problem for many years, admitted how she put her kids lives at risk etc etc and has always seemed really honest and remorseful about her past. She has never appeared to blame anyone but herself and taken full responsibility for her actions.
She has had a dreadful year and relapsed because she is an addict who will always struggle with this horrible disease. It took a hold on her again and she was in denial and acting like a fool for few months - but to her credit she takes full responsibility for this and blames no-one else but herself. She feels she's let people down and this is what seems to cause her the most upset.
She's now in America trying to turn her life around again and for some reason people seem to want to put the boot in rather than wish her well. Good luck to her.
This is in your opinion only isn't it?
As I'm glad you're not my support worker ,believe me working with people with addictions and telling them they have an illness and working with them with kindness does work,but onlywhen they want to help themselves ,
That was exactly my point. An addict will only respond to help when they reach that point that the only person who can help themselves, is themselves. Hence I don't believe it's a disease, it's an addiction you have to learn to take charge off.
Telling them to "cop on" and tough love would have pushed me back into drinking so I think that you have to realise is that these are just your opinions and there's nothing better than a support worker or doctor that understands you and tells you that this is a illness but as long as the person addicted to what ever it is wants to help themselves and realises they have a problem then you are on the right path,
I know it is just my opinions and I think it is a combination of me phrasing my thoughts badly and you reacting personally that has lead to this clash. Realising that you have a problem and want to do something about it, is part of "coping on". When I put my thoughts out on Ds such as telling someone to "cop on", I know fine well that a trained psychologist will be able to say the same thing to an addict but in a much more helpful manner. I would never tell an addict and would have very little faith in a "trained professional" who said "cop on, take responsibility for your life, sort yourself out loser". However, there are means in therapy where you can make a person take responsibility for their lives without belittlinging or humiliating them.
Dianiella knows what she needs to do and the case here if she's still taking it is that she hasn't put in the work to get to step one again when she gets to a meeting and realises she's powerless over drugs and once she's back on that first step she's got the tools to start getting clean again,and someone telling her to pull herself together would definitely make her go even more to drugs,
This is where my empathy for addicts ends. I haven't followed Danielle's story closely but I think she has one child. From what I've read, she's taken coke about six times. From experience of addicts, she is down playing her addiction. My sympathies will always by with the child because the child that is dependant on the parents and can only react to the their environment.
Addictive people aren't criminals why should people with addictions be treated like you say? Everyone deserves love and kindness and it is a disease- a cunning,baffling and powerful one but you can have a reprieve from it one day at a time IF you want to help yourself,
People struggling with addiction aren't always criminals but a lot of times they are. Their addiction is so far gone that they rob and steal from other people (othen times family members). It's all good and well saying that everyone deserves love and kindness but it's hard to love an addict. An addict can be the most selfish, manipulative person in your life and you can show them all the kindness in the world but they will take advantage of you until they decide to take charge of their life.
I do agree with you when you say that the addict can get help once they want help but I think we will always disagree about it being a disease. I think addiction is addiction. Something that needs medical intervention to help the person overcome it but it is not a disease. As far as I am concerned (and like you said it is only my opinion), addiction is not a disease. like you can catch other diseases or be vaccinated against. If I fall over and break my leg, I don't have a leg disease but I do need medical intervention to make sure I overcome my broken leg.
She's in America - back in therapy and to her church. She was in an awful state and crying during much of the interview. Her looks have gone and she seemed like a lost cause. Hopefully she can turn her life around but I tend to think she needs to do it in private rather than always craving the limelight.
That's sad. I'm kind of glad I didn't watch it or see it on the +1. I hate to see people unravel (unless they really, really deserve it). She had seemed to be doing so well until about a year ago. I hope she can get back on the wagon but kind of wish she'd steer clear of the media, from now on, until she's in a better place. She's given her 'public' account and that should be the end of it while she tries to sort herself out. I hope she concentrates on rebuilding faith in herself and the trust of her family. The media are fickle and will come and go- use her for a few headlines, give her a few bob until the next scandal shows up. Her family and any friends who have stuck by her are there for life.
I'm afraid that being a Born again Christian is not going to help matters.. It's simply another crutch, and actually, a method of blame shifting and deluding yourself that because you have this belief all will be well and past mistakes will be atoned.
I think for her sake she needs to quit all media appearances, concentrate on rehab (an extended stay) and focus on getting herself well again; if not for her sake, then her children.
I haven't watched the interview but I think she needs to focus on herself and her children, not endless holidays in Spain or wherever with her toyboy. I also think she needs to go back to rehab and get help for her addiction as becoming a born again christian is not going help much apart from a bit of self confidence.
Some people are being to harsh on here, she was over a decade clear of drugs. When she hit rockbottom she did finally get the help she needed and she's now back on the coke because she is vulnerable and when your vulnerable it can be so easy to fall back onto old habits.
I wish her marriage would get back on track, her husband seemed good to her and helped her overcome her addiction.
She's completely deluded and anything she says should be taken with a truck load of salt. If she says she's taken coke six times, then it's probably a lot more. Look at Peaches. She came across really well when she was advocating attachment parenting on This Morning but little did we know that she was shooting up at home. Don't believe anything that an addict says.
Six times my arse ! For your septum to be eaten away like hers was indicates years of continual, sustained abuse. Six times a day would be more like it.
David Crosby was doing coke like it was going out of fashion in the seventies - and it was much purer back then - and it took years for his septum to perforate. Six snorts will not turn you into an instant addict or eat away your nose overnight. And that is why she's hard to be sympathetic about - the lying, the self-delusion.
To clarify, she said it was six times during her recent relapse - not six times during the history of her addiction.
Well said as the thread did seem to be getting confused. Not that I'm convinced by that account, much like with Nigella tbh but that's none of my business & at least she's trying to get sorted. I can't help but think her getting the gig on Hollyoaks was the start of her decline. Hopefully she can work it out, I doubt she can afford rehab at the moment but I hope she is keeping the right company in America to get back on track.
Oh Danniella, looks like you really can fool some of the people some of the time including Eamon & Ruth......but you've never had me fooled. You are some piece of work.
This woman does not deserve an ounce of anyone's sympathy. Think twice about that next time you see her crying on TV or sobbing about how she's going to change in some downmarket rag. She won't. Ever. She's an addict. A walking timebomb.
She was right about one thing though when she did her car crash interview on This Morning - she does look ugly when she cries! I mean, I know we can't all look like Cheryl Cole but still....:o
Comments
Lovely post, Ella.
In this instance, I can understand why people have no sympathy for Danielle as she's plainly not taking responsibility for herself. If she were, she'd be in rehab now, not doing the tabloid and chatshow rounds. But having little sympathy for her at the moment is not the same thing as not having empathy for someone who struggles with addiction. But only she can turn things around and at the moment, that seems low on her priorities, hence the reaction she's getting.
I really like Eamon and Ruth too! Much prefer them to schofield. (Yes I need a life) lol
Well it's all sad, only she can fight this. She's such a mess, sadly I think it will end badly but I hope I'm wrong.
She's in America - back in therapy and to her church. She was in an awful state and crying during much of the interview. Her looks have gone and she seemed like a lost cause. Hopefully she can turn her life around but I tend to think she needs to do it in private rather than always craving the limelight.
I missed it too. It'll be on ITV1+1 at noon today.
I sincerely hope she has the strength to overcome this.
She has had a dreadful year and relapsed because she is an addict who will always struggle with this horrible disease. It took a hold on her again and she was in denial and acting like a fool for few months - but to her credit she takes full responsibility for this and blames no-one else but herself. She feels she's let people down and this is what seems to cause her the most upset.
She's now in America trying to turn her life around again and for some reason people seem to want to put the boot in rather than wish her well. Good luck to her.
I know it is just my opinions and I think it is a combination of me phrasing my thoughts badly and you reacting personally that has lead to this clash. Realising that you have a problem and want to do something about it, is part of "coping on". When I put my thoughts out on Ds such as telling someone to "cop on", I know fine well that a trained psychologist will be able to say the same thing to an addict but in a much more helpful manner. I would never tell an addict and would have very little faith in a "trained professional" who said "cop on, take responsibility for your life, sort yourself out loser". However, there are means in therapy where you can make a person take responsibility for their lives without belittlinging or humiliating them.
This is where my empathy for addicts ends. I haven't followed Danielle's story closely but I think she has one child. From what I've read, she's taken coke about six times. From experience of addicts, she is down playing her addiction. My sympathies will always by with the child because the child that is dependant on the parents and can only react to the their environment.
People struggling with addiction aren't always criminals but a lot of times they are. Their addiction is so far gone that they rob and steal from other people (othen times family members). It's all good and well saying that everyone deserves love and kindness but it's hard to love an addict. An addict can be the most selfish, manipulative person in your life and you can show them all the kindness in the world but they will take advantage of you until they decide to take charge of their life.
I do agree with you when you say that the addict can get help once they want help but I think we will always disagree about it being a disease. I think addiction is addiction. Something that needs medical intervention to help the person overcome it but it is not a disease. As far as I am concerned (and like you said it is only my opinion), addiction is not a disease. like you can catch other diseases or be vaccinated against. If I fall over and break my leg, I don't have a leg disease but I do need medical intervention to make sure I overcome my broken leg.
That's sad. I'm kind of glad I didn't watch it or see it on the +1. I hate to see people unravel (unless they really, really deserve it). She had seemed to be doing so well until about a year ago. I hope she can get back on the wagon but kind of wish she'd steer clear of the media, from now on, until she's in a better place. She's given her 'public' account and that should be the end of it while she tries to sort herself out. I hope she concentrates on rebuilding faith in herself and the trust of her family. The media are fickle and will come and go- use her for a few headlines, give her a few bob until the next scandal shows up. Her family and any friends who have stuck by her are there for life.
I think for her sake she needs to quit all media appearances, concentrate on rehab (an extended stay) and focus on getting herself well again; if not for her sake, then her children.
Some people are being to harsh on here, she was over a decade clear of drugs. When she hit rockbottom she did finally get the help she needed and she's now back on the coke because she is vulnerable and when your vulnerable it can be so easy to fall back onto old habits.
I wish her marriage would get back on track, her husband seemed good to her and helped her overcome her addiction.
More like sixty. Or six hundred.
David Crosby was doing coke like it was going out of fashion in the seventies - and it was much purer back then - and it took years for his septum to perforate. Six snorts will not turn you into an instant addict or eat away your nose overnight. And that is why she's hard to be sympathetic about - the lying, the self-delusion.
Well said as the thread did seem to be getting confused. Not that I'm convinced by that account, much like with Nigella tbh but that's none of my business & at least she's trying to get sorted. I can't help but think her getting the gig on Hollyoaks was the start of her decline. Hopefully she can work it out, I doubt she can afford rehab at the moment but I hope she is keeping the right company in America to get back on track.
Well any sympathy I had for her has now gone out the window. Silly, silly girl.
This woman does not deserve an ounce of anyone's sympathy. Think twice about that next time you see her crying on TV or sobbing about how she's going to change in some downmarket rag. She won't. Ever. She's an addict. A walking timebomb.
She was right about one thing though when she did her car crash interview on This Morning - she does look ugly when she cries! I mean, I know we can't all look like Cheryl Cole but still....:o