Should I remove my son permanently from her lessons?
80's chick
Posts: 5,207 Forum Member
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Tis a long one sorry but pls I'd like advice if you have the patience to read this 
My son is in year 9 . For about a year now he has been having problems with one of the teachers at his school.
By the sounds of it she doesn't like him and he doesn't like her either.
He can be a bit of a cheeky thing that is easily distracted. But on the whole he is a good boy and the teachers say ' if only he wasn't so easily distracted he'd do so much better'
The teachers like him.
Anyway, I can't remember for what reason exactly, he was removed from this particular teachers class, they were clearly unable to be in the same class as eachother. He was removed for about for about 2 months, we had a meeting, he promised to behaved and she promised to listen to him, his issue was he was being ignored and wasn't being listened to.
Last week he went back into her lessons.
I got a text from him yesterday in school saying he'd had his hand up for 10 minutes and she was completley blanking him, other children had noticed this and commented 'she is deliberately blanking you'. He wanted out of her lesson, I told him to wait and I phoned the school to get 'on call' to remove him before it all kicked off and he ended up being thrown out.
Too late, by the time i'd phoned and explained I wanted on call out of that lesson, she'd already called them and they were removing him.
He was livid.
I researched and found out the lesson he was taking wasn't compulsory for the cirriculum so I went up there all ready to permanently remove him for that particular subject.
Turns out its all hush hush at the moment but she is in fact leaving at Easter. It's not been confirmed but rumours are she is to leave before she is pushed leaving with her record intact. My son isn't the only one that she's had issues with, someone I went to school with said that she'd locked her nephew in a cupboard and my cousin has removed him from her lessons due to 'issues'.
I had a coffee with a friend yesterday and she said her son is also having problems with this teacher.
So, question is , do I remove him from her lessons until she has gone or does he sit tight until Easter running the risk of it all kicking off and he being punished for being removed??
Thanks
My son is in year 9 . For about a year now he has been having problems with one of the teachers at his school.
By the sounds of it she doesn't like him and he doesn't like her either.
He can be a bit of a cheeky thing that is easily distracted. But on the whole he is a good boy and the teachers say ' if only he wasn't so easily distracted he'd do so much better'
The teachers like him.
Anyway, I can't remember for what reason exactly, he was removed from this particular teachers class, they were clearly unable to be in the same class as eachother. He was removed for about for about 2 months, we had a meeting, he promised to behaved and she promised to listen to him, his issue was he was being ignored and wasn't being listened to.
Last week he went back into her lessons.
I got a text from him yesterday in school saying he'd had his hand up for 10 minutes and she was completley blanking him, other children had noticed this and commented 'she is deliberately blanking you'. He wanted out of her lesson, I told him to wait and I phoned the school to get 'on call' to remove him before it all kicked off and he ended up being thrown out.
Too late, by the time i'd phoned and explained I wanted on call out of that lesson, she'd already called them and they were removing him.
He was livid.
I researched and found out the lesson he was taking wasn't compulsory for the cirriculum so I went up there all ready to permanently remove him for that particular subject.
Turns out its all hush hush at the moment but she is in fact leaving at Easter. It's not been confirmed but rumours are she is to leave before she is pushed leaving with her record intact. My son isn't the only one that she's had issues with, someone I went to school with said that she'd locked her nephew in a cupboard and my cousin has removed him from her lessons due to 'issues'.
I had a coffee with a friend yesterday and she said her son is also having problems with this teacher.
So, question is , do I remove him from her lessons until she has gone or does he sit tight until Easter running the risk of it all kicking off and he being punished for being removed??
Thanks
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Comments
I would then visit the head teacher in person and explain everything. If other parents can support you, so much the better.
Explain that it is causing stress to your son, and to you. This is your sons education and self-esteem which is in jeopardy.
This teacher should not be teaching. The head master should put her on to non-teaching duties for the remainder of her contract, or put her on paid leave due to improper conduct investigations perhaps. Either way the buck stops at the head master and this teacher should not be with the kids.
But try and get support from other parents and also put it in writing (send a letter to the head master a day after the meeting outlining your points - keep a paper trail). If the meeting does not go well tell him/her that you plan to take it further with the education authorities. I have a feeling this will make him/her take it rather more seriously.
Does your son actually enjoy this lesson (the teacher issue aside) and what else would he do to fill in the time he should be studying this particular lesson?
totally agree with the above report her, poor excuse for a teacher anyway by trhe sound of things.
Take the cotton wool off and tell your son to get over it.
Absolutely not.
You say you can't remember exactly why he was removed from her class. You need to find this out. Ignore rumour from other parents, get an appt with the head and find out what exactly is going on.
Getting towards the end of year 11 I said enough was enough, and wrote a formal letter of complaint to my headteacher.
The head said "he couldn't do anything unless I have proof of this". So in my next lesson I got my friend to film the lesson on his phone. Discretely of course.
At the end of the day I spoke to my teacher about the fact I felt he was ignoring me. He said "I am because you don't deserve any qualifications".
That was the final straw, after speaking with my parents they agreed with what I wanted to do. The next day, I arranged to meet the head. I showed him the film of him ignoring me. At the end of that week he was gone, I never saw him again.
Then the highlight of all it was I thought I had failed maths, turned out I passed with only 2 marks of a B. I was over the moon:)
EDIT: I always tried my hardest even his lessons even though I couldn't stand him. My parents told me to ignore him and focus on myself. They also said if he refused to help you, walk out and ask one of the other teachers to help. They always helped as they understood my problem with him.
Agree. Both sides seem at fault in their behaviour.
LOVE this description!!
Usually, 'on-call' staff are Heads or Year or Senior Leadership Team-Head, deputies etc-who are not teaching and can be sent to classroom quickly to prevent a situation escalating, usually by removing the student for some calming time-out.
He may have failed to understand something and could be asking for help.
"Kicking-off" or being a "cheeky thing" is something you expect to see in a primary school. You say he's in year 9? Should have learnt that lesson by now. Given all you've described the only "evidence" as such, is from your son. Not that I wish to call your son an outright liar - I have to say there are 2 sides to every story. Maybe you should be backing the teacher? Show your son that SHE (the teacher) is in charge and HE (your son) should respect her for it.
In life, we won't get on with everyone or like/be liked. Sometimes you just have to get on with it. Sooner he learns that, the better.
Or equally he could be doing it to attention seek and be disruptive. Unfortunately we only have one side of the story. I find it hard to believe a teacher would be harsh on him for no reason.
It sounds like the teacher is having problems with discipline and when that happens there can be extra conflict with a pupil who is 'difficult' anyway. I think probably the OP's son should be removed from her lessons for the sake of her sanity and to stop him getting into even more trouble. I agree he should learn to control himself but I don't think this is going to happen in these lessons. A lesson where control is not being kept generally is like a red rag to a bull where an undisciplined student is concerned.
Exactly right. I get the feeling your son is presenting a very one sided view of things.
ALL his teachers say he's easily distracted? That could be tactful teacher talk for he's a pain in the neck in class.
Had his hand up for ten minutes and she blanked him? Perhaps she was letting other children speak - there will be another 29 of them in there.there. Does he insist on being the centre of attention at all times? Is not being the centre that what makes him 'kick off'? You seem rather tolerant (nervous?) of this 'kicking off - perhaps the teacher isn't and won't tolerate it. And why should she, or any other teacher, accept ill tempered explosions?
Of course I could be quite wrong and maybe she is a dud teacher.
But either way, what is to be gained by stirring things up now? She's leaving shortly
This particular pupil might have been asking irrelevant questions just to be cheeky and annoy the teacher and so the teacher has decided to ignore future questions.
I have no idea what went on in the classroom and so don't really want to completely take sides because it does sound like the teacher has some problems but I am wondering why the OP's son is texting in the lesson (against all school rules as far as I am aware) and is prepared to 'kick off' if he doesn't get immediate attention. 'Easily distracted' in teacher speak translates as a 'pain in the butt'.
What's a DS1?
Use more abbreviations please? :eek: