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I am leaving my 8 month old baby (kitten) for a month - will she be mad at me?

Victoria SpongeVictoria Sponge Posts: 16,645
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Hi all. I would like some advice please.

I booked a holiday to Brazil way back in March, before my kitten (Chloe) was even born. I hadn't even intended to get a kitten but this baby really needed a home so I took her in.

Anyway, I am flying out next week. I have made adequate arrangements for Chloe to be looked after, loved, fed and entertained by 5 of my neighbours (who adore her) and a family member on rotation. They will also keep me updated daily via Whatsapp/text with news, pics and videos. They have looked after Chloe before when I have been away for up to three nights.

I am going to be away for a whole month. If I knew of my imminent circumstances at the time of booking, I would have only booked to go away for only two weeks. I know I will miss her immensely and I will be worrying about her.

I am worried that she will miss me and may even be angry at me, thinking I may have abandoned her. Is she going to hate me when I return? Will she have forgotten me? :o

Am I just worrying over nothing? Is it a good idea to Skype/Facetime her while I am away?

How do you and your pet cope with this amount of time being separated?

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    ShrikeShrike Posts: 16,607
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    Sounds like you've taken good care of her needs whilst you're away - she'll be fine!
    Not sure she'd actually recognise you over skype, but if she did wouldn't it do more harm than good? She won't understand whats happening at all. I'd trust to the people you've lined up for her to keep her happy.
    Some people say their cats give them the cold shoulder after a break - mine has sometimes but she's always got over that in a few hours and ended up more attentive than usual (she's not a very loving cat normally).
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    DDRickyDDDDRickyDD Posts: 5,251
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    Chloe will be fine with the five neighbours, I'm sure they'll feed her, stroke her, and tickle her tummy if she likes that. Cat's are very independent, unlike dogs, they can go for days without their owners and still feel perfectly happy and satisfied. You could use seeing Chloe again as something to look forward to, so you don't get too down when you get back from your holiday.
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    MuzeMuze Posts: 2,225
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    Only concerns would be... is she spayed? have you informed her carers she must not be let out?
    Also, have you come to any arrangement about who will pay emergency vet fees is need be?
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    Victoria SpongeVictoria Sponge Posts: 16,645
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    Shrike wrote: »
    Sounds like you've taken good care of her needs whilst you're away - she'll be fine!
    Not sure she'd actually recognise you over skype, but if she did wouldn't it do more harm than good? She won't understand whats happening at all. I'd trust to the people you've lined up for her to keep her happy.
    Some people say their cats give them the cold shoulder after a break - mine has sometimes but she's always got over that in a few hours and ended up more attentive than usual (she's not a very loving cat normally).
    Shrike i think maybe you're right, if she sees and recognises me on skype she may get confused, so I won't do that now. I've just made a whatsapp group with all the neighbours so they can give me regular updates and pics as of next week.
    DDRickyDD wrote: »
    Chloe will be fine with the five neighbours, I'm sure they'll feed her, stroke her, and tickle her tummy if she likes that. Cat's are very independent, unlike dogs, they can go for days without their owners and still feel perfectly happy and satisfied. You could use seeing Chloe again as something to look forward to, so you don't get too down when you get back from your holiday.
    Yep, they all love Chloe and vice versa so she will have lots of love and care.

    True, it'll be amazing to see her again on my return!
    Muze wrote: »
    Only concerns would be... is she spayed? have you informed her carers she must not be let out?
    Also, have you come to any arrangement about who will pay emergency vet fees is need be?
    Good questions. Chloe recently got spayed and has now made a full recovery. Chloe is an apartment cat so she doesn't go out.

    The emergency vet...I thought about this just the other day. I have full insurance for her, I'll inform the carers of the policy and if any cash is needed my family member will pay.
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    Bex_123Bex_123 Posts: 10,783
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    Hi all. I would like some advice please.

    I booked a holiday to Brazil way back in March, before my kitten (Chloe) was even born. I hadn't even intended to get a kitten but this baby really needed a home so I took her in.

    Anyway, I am flying out next week. I have made adequate arrangements for Chloe to be looked after, loved, fed and entertained by 5 of my neighbours (who adore her) and a family member on rotation. They will also keep me updated daily via Whatsapp/text with news, pics and videos. They have looked after Chloe before when I have been away for up to three nights.

    I am going to be away for a whole month. If I knew of my imminent circumstances at the time of booking, I would have only booked to go away for only two weeks. I know I will miss her immensely and I will be worrying about her.

    I am worried that she will miss me and may even be angry at me, thinking I may have abandoned her. Is she going to hate me when I return? Will she have forgotten me? :o

    Am I just worrying over nothing? Is it a good idea to Skype/Facetime her while I am away?

    How do you and your pet cope with this amount of time being separated?

    Oh bless you Victoria :)

    Chloe will be fine, sounds like she is going to be amazingly looked after while you are away! She might well be a bit miffed and seem a little off with you when you get back, I have always found this to be the case with cats when I have gone away. But they soon get back to normal.

    I've had to move into a houseshare where I can't have my beautiful cat with me right now so she is being looked after (spoilt) by my parents who adore her and has been for the last year or so. She still knows who I am when I get to see her.

    Enjoy your trip!

    PS, I am glad I am not the only person who considers Facetiming the cat :blush:
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    mrsgrumpy49mrsgrumpy49 Posts: 10,061
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    Why would she be mad?
    Cats however can be quite fickle. A new 'mum' can easily be found.
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    misha06misha06 Posts: 3,378
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    I had to leave The Beast at nearly 5 months in a cat hotel.

    He was 'street legal' (had all is jabs) but was not yet old enough to be neutered.

    Cost no barrier, he was gonna have the best I could find, a lot of places wouldn't take him because of the neutering issue, and those that would were, shall we say, a bit manky.

    I found one about 10 miles away, dropped in, unannounced, explained he was a still a kitten, and had a look around. The place gave a good vibe.

    The owner was a real no nonsense lady but lovely. So booked him in.

    Day of departure arrived and I explained to the Beast that I had to go away for a while but I would be back soon. He just gave a big yawn in my face (setting the precedent for the following years :p)

    Squeaked all the way there. (him not me)

    We get there, and after the formalities, I bring the beast from the car.

    I am instantly a non person, all her attention is on the Beast. Talking to him through the carry box and cooing at him. We go to his berth, put his box down and he tentatively crawls out.

    He looked so little, I fished out his favourite toy mouse. But he just looked at me.

    Nearly choked up.

    The house was empty the night before I went away, I was tempted to call the cattery to see how he was doing, but resisted.

    When I went to pick him up I was thinking "will he hate me" The lady said he was a good as gold, and loved attacking the mop and brush when they cleaned his room.

    When we went to him, he was fast asleep, with his mouse. I called his name, bless him, he just yawned first, then realised who it was and went mental and scampered to me.

    And we bashed faces (it's our bromance thing)

    During the first couple of years of his life he spent more than is normal for a cat in a cattery, but every time I picked him up he was kipping, then he woke up and squeaked.

    I became a bit if a joke between me and the lady that that he was determined to show he was upset and had a terrible time, but we always caught him out.

    Years later I had to spend a few weeks away for work, coming home at the weekend and the OH was left as chief servant. She loves him unconditionally, and spoils him more than I do. But from the start it was just me and him, and he always comes to me first

    He would wait for the sound of my car and rush out, squeaking, and we would bash faces. The OH who had cared for him all week was forgotten. Then he would go into 'hump' mode and ignore me for a while as if to make a point. "I love you, but you haven't been here, so I'm gonna be narked at you for a while, so you learn a lesson.

    Then, come bedtime, he would flop on me and dribble.

    I guess absence does make the heart grow fonder:)

    Another rambling post - sorry:blush:
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    MarellaKMarellaK Posts: 5,783
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    I enjoy reading your posts about the Beast, Misha. He's a lucky cat to be so loved.

    I hate leaving my cats when I'm on holiday and my non cat owning friends think I'm odd that I plan my holidays around the needs of my cats. Other cat owners understand.
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    Aarghawasp!Aarghawasp! Posts: 6,205
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    She will be fine, but she will also make you feel guilty and use that to her advantage. :D
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    Victoria SpongeVictoria Sponge Posts: 16,645
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    Bex_123 wrote: »
    PS, I am glad I am not the only person who considers Facetiming the cat :blush:
    lol, I considered it secretly and two of my friends also suggested it! But after the very good advice in this thread I have decided against it, as it would have been for my benefit rather than Chloe's and I would not want her to be confused/distressed as a result of it.
    Why would she be mad?
    Cats however can be quite fickle. A new 'mum' can easily be found.
    Oh no what I horrible thought! This is why I always endeavour to be the best mummy in the world. I try and give Chloe the very best of everything, including lots of very loving aunties and uncles, but I have always been her favourite person so far :)
    misha06 wrote: »
    I guess absence does make the heart grow fonder:)

    Another rambling post - sorry:blush:
    A lovely read, Misha! I didn't know there were cat hotels…I can't imagine I would need to use one these days but if my circumstances ever change, it is good to know that could be an option.
    MarellaK wrote: »
    I hate leaving my cats when I'm on holiday and my non cat owning friends think I'm odd that I plan my holidays around the needs of my cats. Other cat owners understand.
    I think even my non-cat owning friends realise that having a cat is very similar in many ways to caring for a baby!
    She will be fine, but she will also make you feel guilty and use that to her advantage. :D
    Awww, that's OK, princess Chloe can have anything she wants out of me, I like to spoil her :D


    I really need to stop worrying though. Cos yesterday morning I had this awful nightmare that she died in the care of friends. It was so, so horrible. I think I am stressing about preparing for my hols as well as feeling sad about leaving Chloe kitten.

    Chloe's entourage are absolutely great and know what they are doing, so I am very lucky and really I have nothing to worry about. And as Bex says, I should just enjoy the hols.
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    queenshaksqueenshaks Posts: 10,281
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    As long as she's well cared for, you have no worries.

    Enjoy your hols :) xx
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    mrsgrumpy49mrsgrumpy49 Posts: 10,061
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    Oh no what I horrible thought! This is why I always endeavour to be the best mummy in the world. I try and give Chloe the very best of everything, including lots of very loving aunties and uncles, but I have always been her favourite person so far :)

    Sorry that was mean of me. But lots of cat owners like to boast how independent their pets are. The downside to this is of course is that they can transfer their allegiance to someone who feeds them better etc. A neighbour is at this moment having a running battle with another neighbour who has taken to inviting her cat in, even buying it food. It's not that her cat is not looked after, it's more that these people love cats but are not in a position yet to have one of their own - so they thought they would solve the problem by having an unofficial part share in someone else's. :confused:
    I'm sure however there will be no problems in your case so long as any temporary 'care givers' take a back seat on your return.
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    StigglesStiggles Posts: 9,618
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    My 2 are funny when we come back from holiday. The youngest one Yianni (7) comes flying up to us, does the headbash thing and won't leave us alone! Even thinks he's helping us unpack by diving into the suitcase :D

    The older one Neo (11) walks through slowly, looks at us as if to say "oh, i see you have returned eventually...", then just turns his back and leaves! He comes out about an hour later and is a sooky as ever :D Little shit he is :D

    Always miss them both dearly when away. I'm at work till 7am just now, and i miss them now!!
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    Victoria SpongeVictoria Sponge Posts: 16,645
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    Sorry that was mean of me. But lots of cat owners like to boast how independent their pets are. The downside to this is of course is that they can transfer their allegiance to someone who feeds them better etc. A neighbour is at this moment having a running battle with another neighbour who has taken to inviting her cat in, even buying it food. It's not that her cat is not looked after, it's more that these people love cats but are not in a position yet to have one of their own - so they thought they would solve the problem by having an unofficial part share in someone else's. :confused:
    I'm sure however there will be no problems in your case so long as any temporary 'care givers' take a back seat on your return.

    Hey Grumpy, I didn't take that as mean.

    I didn't explain that in actual fact, my neighbours (from three of the flats) are in fact among my best friends. We always look after each other's cats. On our whatsapp group they sent me regular pics of Chloe and gave me updates. She was totally fine. She even went on some day trips to one of the neighbour's flats!

    They all did an amazing job of looking after Chloe. She was a little disinterested on my return for about a day, and then she got back to normal and we had lots of cuddles and she slept on my bed with me as usual.

    I am going back to Brasil next week and they will again care for her. I am extremely lucky to have this amazing entourage of friends/neighbours!

    I actually have a kitten in Brasil now, called Charlie. A beautiful little girl who my friend and her family rescued and adopted. She was a nervous wreck (understandably) and not trusting of anyone, but by the time I left, she was friendly and let me cuddle her. She didn't start of as 'my' kitten, but my friend said she is mine because I am clearly her favourite person! I also named her.

    Unfortunately, my friend has recently informed me that Charlie has gone missing…been missing for days :( Charlie does know that that is her home, and I am hoping she will come back. Or at least wherever she is, I hope she is safe x
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    oilmanoilman Posts: 4,529
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    One of my friends works offshore (2 week offshore, three weeks at home). He's has a neighbour who looks after cat when he is away. Whenever he comes home the cat always glares at him, and deliberately selects his favourite spot, refuses to move and ignores him for 24 hours. After that he is fine and back to normal, once he has made his protest!

    So yes go on holiday. Cat might get the hump with you when you get back but it will soon pass.
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