Oh, and I can't stand bad boys. Whereas allegedly a lot of us women do (so I hear???)
Isn't that more of a phase that some, mostly younger women, go through? The mad, bad and dangerous to know glamour.... which is not nearly so great when they find the bloke is a self-obsessed prick, unreliable, boring and usually rather poor in bed.
Isn't that more of a phase that some, mostly younger women, go through? The mad, bad and dangerous to know glamour.... which is not nearly so great when they find the bloke is a self-obsessed prick, unreliable, boring and usually rather poor in bed.
Alas I know a lot of women who have been married for 20+years, get divorced and learn about the dating game again, and have forgotten all about why bad boys are bad news, especially when comparing to the boring ex...... you know the drill. Thank **** I'm not one of them - yes, I've been single for a good while now but I'd rather be that way than go from one sexy mean rebel to the next.
Thank **** I'm not one of them - yes, I've been single for a good while now but I'd rather be that way than go from one sexy mean rebel to the next.
Good for you! There are blokes out there who have an edge, can make you laugh, rebel against what needs rebelling against and not just for effect, and know how to entertain a woman. ;-) Just when you least expect it, one will appear in your life.
The reverse happened to me, unexpectedly, following a hellish period in my life, looking after terminally ill parents, etc. Then, while re-engaging with general life in the company of a woman who I'd been just friends with for a few years, life took a happy turn. Neither of us was looking for romance at the time, the realisation that we felt stronger, and had an opportunity, came out of the blue. It changed both our lives for the better.
Coming up to 30 and still no long-lasting relationship ever in my life, it'd be funny if it wasn't for the fact I'm so damn lonely about it all. All the time the girls I meet just want to be friends or move off and find other fellas themselves, the girls i've genuinely had feelings for have never reciprocated (despite people telling me I should try).
It's fairly sad when i'm waiting at the bus stop and just hoping someone says hi. But they never do.
You will find your special someone. Give it time. I know how you feel. It can seem that you are doomed but something will come about this. Just have faith and you will find yourself with the gal of your dreams soon. Keep your chin up.
You will find your special someone. Give it time. I know how you feel. It can seem that you are doomed but something will come about this. Just have faith and you will find yourself with the gal of your dreams soon.
There really isn't someone for everyone. There are some men out there that, no matter what, will never have a relationship. Maybe the OPs one of them, maybe he's not, but if he is, it's probably best to accept it and move on than follow this 'someone for everyone' philosophy, because then he'll just spend his life looking for something he can't get, instead of looking at what he has.
I remember I always used to get attention from girls on nights out, but I always bottled it. I haven't been out for ages and next time I go out and wanna take advantage of it. If only I knew when I was 18/19 what I know now, I would have taken all these chances.
A friend of mine used to think the same. He constantly moaned that no girls liked him the way he was and he went on a self loathing trip where he tried to change his personality, his looks and his interests. Still didnt work. The problem was that some girls were interested in him, but he was too busy paying attention to the ones that werent.
So while he was spending his time trying to attract the girls who werent interested in him, he was ignoring the ones who were whilst moaning that no girls liked him!
Im not saying anyone should lower their standards etc but not all women look for the same thing. If they did then there would be a small minority of men in relationships and the majority would be single.
I'll explain my situation in order to somewhat clarify yours. I find that the few who are interested in me are those who I dont have any attraction to and vice versa. Under these circumstances you have two options - settle for someone you have no feelings toward knowing you'll do no better or remain single.
Of course, having no knowledge of flirting, eccentric interests and many other reasons for being in the position I am in now do not help, but I would rather be happy, single and childless for the rest of my life than live a lie, be miserable and full of regrets.
There really isn't someone for everyone. There are some men out there that, no matter what, will never have a relationship. Maybe the OPs one of them, maybe he's not, but if he is, it's probably best to accept it and move on than follow this 'someone for everyone' philosophy, because then he'll just spend his life looking for something he can't get, instead of looking at what he has.
As saddening and tragic as that sounds, it is reality. Better to make of the hand you have been dealt in life than to pine for something that may never be.
If you just want a one night thing there are these horrible clubs you can go, but that is not for me. I want to know the person before anything happens. Even in decent clubs girls dance in a horrible way, very loose all over men they do not even know and snogging when they have just met. Alright for some but I find it dreadful and stay away from clubs now unless I am really drunk and even then girls don't even look.
Send me to the 60's I think I would be far happier.
I'll explain my situation in order to somewhat clarify yours. I find that the few who are interested in me are those who I dont have any attraction to and vice versa. Under these circumstances you have two options - settle for someone you have no feelings toward knowing you'll do no better or remain single.
Of course, having no knowledge of flirting, eccentric interests and many other reasons for being in the position I am in now do not help, but I would rather be happy, single and childless for the rest of my life than live a lie, be miserable and full of regrets.
As saddening and tragic as that sounds, it is reality. Better to make of the hand you have been dealt in life than to pine for something that may never be.
The bit in bold are wise words indeed. Hooking up with the wrong person, just to avoid being single, can be a miserable existence for both people concerned.
I know someone who was desperate to have a big white wedding followed by a baby, and when she was in her mid-30's, met and married a man she'd known for less than 6 months (met at a singles night). She's achieved her dream, but openly admits she doesn't love her husband, in fact she treats him with disdain and contempt. He's a gentle, shy man, and I feel a bit sad for him. Although to be fair, he dotes on their child and is a fantastic dad.
Well .. there's always the Filipino Wife option if you don't mind having your life savings syphoned off to support her immediate family/uncles and aunts/whole village.
Well .. there's always the Filipino Wife option if you don't mind having your life savings syphoned off to support her immediate family/uncles and aunts/whole village.
I know of a man who did this, he put on a lot of weight when he met her, and 12 or so years later he drops head. She kept cooking fatty foods for him, now she as his house and all his money.
My girlfriend's son is 28, and living with us at the moment. He's not bad looking, physically quite fit, intelligent, able to talk easily, and generally a decent fellow. Yet in the 8 years I've know him, he's never been on a single date. In fact the last time he was out with a bird, was when he took his budgie to the vet!
He claims to want a family of his own one day, and as he spent some time working security in Brighton, I think that if he were gay we'd know - and he'd know - by now. But, whenever I bring the up subject of actually finding a relationship, and that he's wasting some of the best years of his life, he clams up. So I have to conclude that some men are just odd.
Not the OP, of course, who sounds like he'd love to get involved. The answer, ISTM, is to stop hanging around at bus stops hoping to pick someone up, and possibly scaring them away in the process. Join some sporting clubs or other things where regular folk meet and can talk, just as friends. That's all great practise, and who knows, maybe someone will come along, first as a friend. But if not, then it's time to give on-line dating a try. My aforementioned girlfriend's daughter did that for the first time in her life (good looking girl, smart, just not meeting the right person), and literally the first man she went on a date with turned out to be Mr Right. A year later they married, and now have a lovely young son. Sorted.
Your post seems a bit narrow-minded TBH. So what if your girlfriend's son has been single since you've known him? Has it ever occurred to you that maybe he's actually quite happy being single? Marriage, 2 kids & a white picket fence aren't the be all and end all. But according to you, anyone who doesn't want these things is 'just odd'.
And for all you know, he may want to settle down, just not right now in his 20s - so what, exactly, is wrong with that? Also, he could be unsure of his sexuality; people can be unsure of that at any stage in their lives, not just in their teens.
I know of a man who did this, he put on a lot of weight when he met her, and 12 or so years later he drops head. She kept cooking fatty foods for him, now she as his house and all his money.
Make of that what you will.
You mean she cooked him fatty food, he ate it and he got fat and she stole his house and money. What a devious cow.
I know of a man who did this, he put on a lot of weight when he met her, and 12 or so years later he drops head. She kept cooking fatty foods for him, now she as his house and all his money.
Please, please, when you do meet girls/women, don't chat them up or use chat-up lines. Just chat to them! Let them see you're a nice, friendly, non-threatening man. I don't think men realise how easy it is to come over as creepy to girls, and for them to find such behaviour threatening. Don't be like that; if you do approach anyone, do it in the same way as if they were a male friend you'd just spotted.
I totally agree with the bit in bold.
I have been totally frightened to death, (slight exaggeration), by ultra-flirty, persistent men I've never met before approaching me when I was on my own, at bus stops and on buses.
Yes OP, it is remotely possible that you may have some luck approaching random women on the street or at the bus stop. But please spare a thought for all the people on here who've said it seems creepy. It is not a good thing to alarm and frighten strangers.
I would say it's an unwritten rule that it's inappropriate behaviour, ie, creepy. If you must chat women up do it in a night club or pub or similar, (socially acceptable), situation and always when the women has friends with her.
There is someone for everyone even though some people never meet the right person, and a person with low confidence, can give off "not interested" vibes which repel others who are interested in them.
Isn't there a larger population of women in the world than men? Therefore there is someone for everyone lol.
Only if you think women are subservient to men.
Actually, there are more single men than women in the UK, with there only being more single women than men in the 70's and above age group with the reality of shorter life expectancies for men kicking in at that point:
Also, the whole concept of a soulmate has no foundation or basis in reality. It's an invention of the media to introduce love interests in a short amount of time, like in a two hour movie. It's unfortunate that some people seem to have applied this invention to real life.
Actually, there are more single men than women in the UK, with there only being more single women than men in the 70's and above age group with the reality of shorter life expectancies for men kicking in at that point:
Also, the whole concept of a soulmate has no foundation or basis in reality. It's an invention of the media to introduce love interests in a short amount of time, like in a two hour movie. It's unfortunate that some people seem to have applied this invention to real life.
There is a difference between believing there is possibly a good relationship match for everyone and the concept of a soulmate.
I would also say that a lot of people just need to work on themselves before they find someone. It adds a lot of issues to a relationship if someone goes into it expecting it to fix them.
Comments
Isn't that more of a phase that some, mostly younger women, go through? The mad, bad and dangerous to know glamour.... which is not nearly so great when they find the bloke is a self-obsessed prick, unreliable, boring and usually rather poor in bed.
Alas I know a lot of women who have been married for 20+years, get divorced and learn about the dating game again, and have forgotten all about why bad boys are bad news, especially when comparing to the boring ex...... you know the drill. Thank **** I'm not one of them - yes, I've been single for a good while now but I'd rather be that way than go from one sexy mean rebel to the next.
Good for you! There are blokes out there who have an edge, can make you laugh, rebel against what needs rebelling against and not just for effect, and know how to entertain a woman. ;-) Just when you least expect it, one will appear in your life.
The reverse happened to me, unexpectedly, following a hellish period in my life, looking after terminally ill parents, etc. Then, while re-engaging with general life in the company of a woman who I'd been just friends with for a few years, life took a happy turn. Neither of us was looking for romance at the time, the realisation that we felt stronger, and had an opportunity, came out of the blue. It changed both our lives for the better.
You will find your special someone. Give it time. I know how you feel. It can seem that you are doomed but something will come about this. Just have faith and you will find yourself with the gal of your dreams soon. Keep your chin up.
As Mammy Pinot Grigio sez, "For every auld shoe, there's a sock".
Unless you're a flip flop. Or slip on Toms.
Of course, having no knowledge of flirting, eccentric interests and many other reasons for being in the position I am in now do not help, but I would rather be happy, single and childless for the rest of my life than live a lie, be miserable and full of regrets. As saddening and tragic as that sounds, it is reality. Better to make of the hand you have been dealt in life than to pine for something that may never be.
Send me to the 60's I think I would be far happier.
The bit in bold are wise words indeed. Hooking up with the wrong person, just to avoid being single, can be a miserable existence for both people concerned.
I know someone who was desperate to have a big white wedding followed by a baby, and when she was in her mid-30's, met and married a man she'd known for less than 6 months (met at a singles night). She's achieved her dream, but openly admits she doesn't love her husband, in fact she treats him with disdain and contempt. He's a gentle, shy man, and I feel a bit sad for him. Although to be fair, he dotes on their child and is a fantastic dad.
Well .. there's always the Filipino Wife option if you don't mind having your life savings syphoned off to support her immediate family/uncles and aunts/whole village.
I know of a man who did this, he put on a lot of weight when he met her, and 12 or so years later he drops head. She kept cooking fatty foods for him, now she as his house and all his money.
Make of that what you will.
Your post seems a bit narrow-minded TBH. So what if your girlfriend's son has been single since you've known him? Has it ever occurred to you that maybe he's actually quite happy being single? Marriage, 2 kids & a white picket fence aren't the be all and end all. But according to you, anyone who doesn't want these things is 'just odd'.
And for all you know, he may want to settle down, just not right now in his 20s - so what, exactly, is wrong with that? Also, he could be unsure of his sexuality; people can be unsure of that at any stage in their lives, not just in their teens.
You mean she cooked him fatty food, he ate it and he got fat and she stole his house and money. What a devious cow.
That's a killer with some endurance.
I totally agree with the bit in bold.
I have been totally frightened to death, (slight exaggeration), by ultra-flirty, persistent men I've never met before approaching me when I was on my own, at bus stops and on buses.
Yes OP, it is remotely possible that you may have some luck approaching random women on the street or at the bus stop. But please spare a thought for all the people on here who've said it seems creepy. It is not a good thing to alarm and frighten strangers.
I would say it's an unwritten rule that it's inappropriate behaviour, ie, creepy. If you must chat women up do it in a night club or pub or similar, (socially acceptable), situation and always when the women has friends with her.
There is someone for everyone even though some people never meet the right person, and a person with low confidence, can give off "not interested" vibes which repel others who are interested in them.
There really isn't
Actually, there are more single men than women in the UK, with there only being more single women than men in the 70's and above age group with the reality of shorter life expectancies for men kicking in at that point:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/3991981.stm
Also, the whole concept of a soulmate has no foundation or basis in reality. It's an invention of the media to introduce love interests in a short amount of time, like in a two hour movie. It's unfortunate that some people seem to have applied this invention to real life.
There is a difference between believing there is possibly a good relationship match for everyone and the concept of a soulmate.
I would also say that a lot of people just need to work on themselves before they find someone. It adds a lot of issues to a relationship if someone goes into it expecting it to fix them.
I refer the honourable member to post #201 ..