I feel so sad reading some of the comments, here, from those who were hit by their dads. Mine smacked me on my bare bum when I was little and had done something wrong (I can't remember much about it). My mum said he spent the rest of the night in tears because he felt so rotten about it. I don't remember being hit by him after that (am female, btw). He liked a drink but was never violent or handy with his fists and I miss him like crazy. I think I would rather have the pain of grieving for him than remembering him as a violent bully. It's amazing how many people turn out okay after experiencing that as a child, despite the hurt and/or anger they must feel- and how many go on to make sure their own children never experience it. That is a testament to 'overpowering' the person who hit them, IMO.
Also, there is so much more that makes a person 'strong' than physical prowess.
It depends on the father's purpose of keeping his son in the place.
He fails if he can't control his violent-tempered son any more.
He succeeds if he taught his son to defend himself in a mock fight scenario.
No-one wins if they've always engaged in a violent relationship.
That moment when a father comes to the conclusion that he can no longer try to intimadate his son is the moment he has lost the battle.
I remember this day with my dad it was so sweet and liberating, true sense of freedom.
Has that moment happened to you?
maybe you didnt have that type of relationship with your dad?
does the same apply to girls with mothers?
I saw exactly what you describe with my two brothers,the youngest challenged the older bully to a fight and he refused.it was a day I will never forget I felt so happy inside.up to that I was always coming between them and stopping violence taking place.
its not so much a father failing as a son finally being able to stand up to a bully,caused in my opinion by jealousy of the son.
I had attained my shodan black belt in karate by the age of 19, so my dad wasn't too quick to pick any kind of fight with me anyway. I was bigger than him too at that age. He soon realised his fragility when he came down the dojo and trained for a few sessions with us. But my dad never really intimidated us anyway, he's a kind bloke when all said and done, and despite some ups and downs, I have a lot of respect for the guy. It's not a failure, just the natural way of things. I'm sure my own youngsters will be the same with me one day.
This is actually fairly common. I've heard several stories of men who, as children, have taken beatings or listened to their mother being beaten or intimidated and one day, usually around age 14 or 15, they snap and the tables turn, only for the father to stop the behavior almost entirely.
I would say that in that situation, the father has actually succeeded. Because, despite him being such a horrible person, he has managed to produce a son who acts like a real man should, who will defend himself and his family, and who knows right from wrong.
Clique your heels together three times and repeat after me "there's no place like home"! That'll sort them.
Blimey, that Wizard of Oz reference will send our macho dad-basher chum into meltdown as he regales us with tales of his pappy-punching power which prove his not-gayness.
But what if his father took him from behind? Would it be a failure to not beat dad off?
Comments
Oooer..
Okay, here's the big question...
Do you think men should sit down to pee and wipe afterwards? :eek::D
I'd say the father has failed because his son WANTS to over power him.
Clique your heels together three times and repeat after me "there's no place like home"! That'll sort them.
Also, there is so much more that makes a person 'strong' than physical prowess.
It does rather doesn't it. Even the way the question is worded is quite sad.
He fails if he can't control his violent-tempered son any more.
He succeeds if he taught his son to defend himself in a mock fight scenario.
No-one wins if they've always engaged in a violent relationship.
Or succeeded because the son thinks in the same way as the father, i.e. he needs to over-power him rather than just stand up to him.
Like an after the pub kebab?
I saw exactly what you describe with my two brothers,the youngest challenged the older bully to a fight and he refused.it was a day I will never forget I felt so happy inside.up to that I was always coming between them and stopping violence taking place.
its not so much a father failing as a son finally being able to stand up to a bully,caused in my opinion by jealousy of the son.
Exactly.
This sounds like a load of silly macho codswallop I'm afraid OP.
I would say that in that situation, the father has actually succeeded. Because, despite him being such a horrible person, he has managed to produce a son who acts like a real man should, who will defend himself and his family, and who knows right from wrong.
But what if his father took him from behind? Would it be a failure to not beat dad off?