Oh shut UP about your boring baby

Gaditano · 17/12/13 - 03:51

Expecting to be jumped on for this, but I need to vent! My niece-in-law (why don't we have a word for that!?) gave birth to her first baby back in the spring. The baby is healthy and happy and well-loved and all of that is great. Both parents are caring and loving and devoted. Also great. I genuinely wish all of them all the best.

But: oh god they don't ever want to talk about anything but the bloody baby. Every crinkle of his little mouth, how many hours he sleeps in each of his naps, what he ate today, yesterday, last Thursday, next Tuesday....... They must post eighty photos a day on Facebook - here he is holding a biscuit, here he is two seconds later having moved the biscuit half a centimetre.....

And of course it's coming up to Christmas. So we have to hear how they took him to see Santa (which I reckon must have confused the hell out of the tiny infant), how many gazillions of presents they have bought him, **the Christmas card he sent Mummy and Daddy**. He is EIGHT MONTHS OLD so I doubt if he WENT AND BOUGHT A STAMP.

Sorry. I feel better now. No I don't have kids of my own. Feel free to attack me!

exlordlucan · 17/12/13 - 03:54

You're a glutton for punishment because don't have to hear anything nor visit the facebook page.

Bex_123 · 17/12/13 - 03:54

I don't have children but I hear the pesky little things need quite a bit of looking after at the beginning and take up rather a lot of your time. Even the night time and when you'd normally be out down the pub or at work.

So I can understand why people talk about them loads when they consume a great deal of time when they're little. Oh and the whole wonderful feeling of bringing new life into the world.

Jeez, I talk about my cat a lot I dread to think what I'd be like with a new baby.

[Deleted User] · 17/12/13 - 03:56

Delete them from your friends, I did with some of my family. It made me feel better.

[Deleted User] · 17/12/13 - 03:56

It does seem quite easy to avoid looking at someone's photographs on facebook. I do it every time I see that anyone has posted screeds of photographs.

As for their boring conversation, it depends how fond of them you are. If not very, just try not to get into conversation with them. If you are, just grit your teeth and wait for them to re-join the human race: they will be glad of some proper adult conversation pretty soon.

djfunnyman · 17/12/13 - 03:57

They sound very irritating

droogiefret · 17/12/13 - 04:00

Wait until he's older and does his first solo potty. If you're lucky they'll keep it to show you.

Gaditano · 17/12/13 - 04:03

wonkeydonkey wrote: »

As for their boring conversation, it depends how fond of them you are. If not very, just try not to get into conversation with them. If you are, just grit your teeth and wait for them to re-join the human race: they will be glad of some proper adult conversation pretty soon.

That's what I'm hoping. They are a sweet couple, but they have been taken by aliens to Planet Baby!

James Frederick · 17/12/13 - 04:04

I love to read baby statues on FB they are the ones I'm most likely to read or pay attention to

Gaditano · 17/12/13 - 04:05

droogiefret wrote: »

Wait until he's older and does his first solo potty. If you're lucky they'll keep it to show you.

At the very least.

[Deleted User] · 17/12/13 - 04:11

I'm with you OP !

Shove your baby updates

Relly · 17/12/13 - 04:16

I'm surprised nobody's mentioned this yet:

http://www.stfuparentsblog.com/

It's amazingly funny, if you hate baby bores.

Flat Matt · 17/12/13 - 04:21

Relly wrote: »

I'm surprised nobody's mentioned this yet:

http://www.stfuparentsblog.com/

It's amazingly funny, if you hate baby bores.

Amazingly funny?

I'd rather read boring baby statuses than that crap.

Takae · 17/12/13 - 04:21

It'll wear off in two or three years' time.

So you can either grin and bear it for at least two more years, or quietly remove them from your friends list (or whatever you call it).

Relly · 17/12/13 - 04:22

Flat Matt wrote: »

Amazingly funny?

I'd rather read boring baby statuses than that crap.

Oh well, each to his/her own. You thinking it's crap doesn't actually make it crap.

Gaditano · 17/12/13 - 04:24

Relly wrote: »

I'm surprised nobody's mentioned this yet:

http://www.stfuparentsblog.com/

It's amazingly funny, if you hate baby bores.

That's new to me but could be a lifeline.

James Frederick · 17/12/13 - 04:25

Relly wrote: »

Oh well, each to his/her own. You thinking it's crap doesn't actually make it crap.

Though TBF he's right

leopard_print · 17/12/13 - 04:25

Oh I know what you mean, I get this at work. Sometimes I feel like screaming SHUT UP!! WHO CARES! nomally I just get up and walk out the room

benjamini · 17/12/13 - 04:25

You sound as self absorbed as your niece in law. Massive yawn to both of you.

Relly · 17/12/13 - 04:26

James Frederick wrote: »

Though TBF he's right

Well, he isn't if other people don't think it's crap. Humour's subjective, after all.

NX-74205 · 17/12/13 - 04:26

It's when they say "do you want to hold him/her?" that I get irked. To this day, I can't remember a baby that hasn't puked on me or, in the case of my Godson, waited until his nappy was off during the change and aimed a stream of pee at me with the precision of a tier one sniper. Plus, I swear he knows what he's doing too, as the little bugger giggles.

farmer bob · 17/12/13 - 04:33

droogiefret wrote: »

Wait until he's older and does his first solo potty. If you're lucky they'll keep it to show you.

By the sound of things they'll probably make a plastercast of its 1st stool and display it somewhere prominent.

[Deleted User] · 17/12/13 - 04:35

Just wait until it learns to talk.

[Deleted User] · 17/12/13 - 04:45

Gaditano wrote: »

Feel free to attack me!

On the contrary... theres nothing worse than a baby bore.. theyre even worse than bridezillas... and I am a mother but am aware nobody gives a shitt hearing about every nappy and bottle...

Addisonian · 17/12/13 - 05:00

As someone who apparantly "never stops banging on about their daughter" on here, I actually agree with you, OP.
I know people who use Facebook and the likes as a blog to keep the world updated about their baby's every fart, informing those hardened enough to read it about the consitency of their bairn's last shit.

I'm all for being a proud parent and harping on about my little girl but some people take it too far.

Espresso · 17/12/13 - 05:17

What is a niece in law? Your nephew's wife or your spouse's niece, I'm guessing
Either way, why be FB friends with her if she annoys you so much? If you can't face de-friending her, just hide her on FB, so you don't have to see what she says on your feed. It's not difficut.

New parents are absorbed in their baby. It was ever thus and always will be. FB is just the latest means of sharing their enthusiasm. You cant change them, but you can change what you see about them.

Hey there!

Quick Links

Oh shut UP about your boring baby

Comments