people who dont have kids

Nat28Nat28 Posts: 2,949
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Im starting to face up to the fact I may never have a child due to fertility problems. Though to be fair me and my boyfriend work full time and struggle with bills so being able to afford everything a child needs would be daunting.
anyway have others on this forum decided not to have children for certain reasons or have not been able to.
looking back do you wish you had decided to have kids (if you c ould )

just wandering as I went through bad depression due to trying for so long. I am saving for fertility treatment or trying to but thats still not guaranteed. Im slowly facing up to the fact I might never have a child.
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Comments

  • EbonyHamsterEbonyHamster Posts: 8,175
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    We aren't having kids, I hate kids, have better things to spend our money on and my condition can pass on

    Would rather pets than kids
  • Nat28Nat28 Posts: 2,949
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    We aren't having kids, I hate kids, have better things to spend our money on and my condition can pass on

    Would rather pets than kids

    If we get a bigger plave my house will be full of dogs. I will be known as the crazy dog lady lol
  • BunionsBunions Posts: 14,995
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    Nat28 wrote: »
    Im starting to face up to the fact I may never have a child due to fertility problems. Though to be fair me and my boyfriend work full time and struggle with bills so being able to afford everything a child needs would be daunting.
    anyway have others on this forum decided not to have children for certain reasons or have not been able to.
    looking back do you wish you had decided to have kids (if you c ould )

    just wandering as I went through bad depression due to trying for so long. I am saving for fertility treatment or trying to but thats still not guaranteed. Im slowly facing up to the fact I might never have a child.
    How old are you OP?

    Is adoption something you would consider?

    My understanding is that this Govt are really trying to make the process easier and quicker.
  • Nat28Nat28 Posts: 2,949
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    Im 30. Havent really thought about adoption tbh iv been fixated on having a baby until recently
  • Welsh-ladWelsh-lad Posts: 51,908
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    We're never having children. Have considered it e.g. adopting but it's such a complicated process, and we wouldn't really have the commitment to it.

    The 'natural' option would mean surrogacy and whatnot, and again would be complicated and a contrived process.

    I work with children every day and hope that I will leave a legacy of sound learning with them.
    Other than that, we are quite happy being childless.
  • CravenHavenCravenHaven Posts: 13,953
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    ds if full of children, you could try adopting a particularly down-on-their-luck poster
  • Nat28Nat28 Posts: 2,949
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    ds if full of children, you could try adopting a particularly down-on-their-luck poster

    I think I would rather be childless :D
  • Nat28Nat28 Posts: 2,949
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    In my last job there was a number of pregnancies at the same time. One woman annoying. She couldmt do anything throught her pregnancy. Would only really make an effort with the women who had kids and kept repeating to them 'us mums need to stick together ' like a mantra. I vowed if I ever had a kid I would never be like her :D
  • LostFoolLostFool Posts: 90,623
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    My brother and his wife went through IVF twice. They were very lucky and were successful first time each time. However, if you think IVF is expensive just wait until they are born.

    Personally, I've never found any woman crazy enough to want to have children with me. I don't mind other people's kids but I've never had any real urge to have some of my own.
  • Nat28Nat28 Posts: 2,949
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    swaydog wrote: »
    Why shouldn't the OP listen the this poster.
    The OP specifically asked if any other FMs decided not to have kids for any reason.

    They might be relived that others don't think that kids are the be all and end all of everyone's lives.

    Tbh it is a relief. I used to think I wasnt a proper woman as I couldnt have a child and its nice to know there is life without children
  • Nat28Nat28 Posts: 2,949
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    LostFool wrote: »
    My brother and his wife went through IVF twice. They were very lucky and were successful first time each time. However, if you think IVF is expensive just wait until they are born.

    Personally, I've never found any woman crazy enough to want to have children with me. I don't mind other people's kids but I've never had any real urge to have some of my own.

    Ivf is really expensive. I keep thinking to myself if it doesnt work its thousands down the drain. Money we could be doing with. So maybe im not that desperate for a child. Folk who are would spend thousands and not care zs long as there was a c hance I suppose
  • Fairyprincess0Fairyprincess0 Posts: 30,038
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    Nat28 wrote: »
    Tbh it is a relief. I used to think I wasnt a proper woman as I couldnt have a child and its nice to know there is life without children

    Well, I'm not a 'proper' woman. But I'd love to have kids, alas, I don't think that likely....
  • EbonyHamsterEbonyHamster Posts: 8,175
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    rbdcay wrote: »
    Oh dear.

    OP I have no words on this subject other than to not listen to the poster above. And with that I am out.

    OP asked for opinions, I gave mine
    Nat28 wrote: »
    If we get a bigger plave my house will be full of dogs. I will be known as the crazy dog lady lol

    I'm crazy hamster lady lol
    swaydog wrote: »
    Why shouldn't the OP listen the this poster.
    The OP specifically asked if any other FMs decided not to have kids for any reason.

    They might be relived that others don't think that kids are the be all and end all of everyone's lives.

    Exactly!
  • Nat28Nat28 Posts: 2,949
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    Well, I'm not a 'proper' woman. But I'd love to have kids, alas, I don't think that likely....

    How come ?
  • Fairyprincess0Fairyprincess0 Posts: 30,038
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    Nat28 wrote: »
    How come ?

    I'm transgendered....
  • Nat28Nat28 Posts: 2,949
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    I'm transgendered....

    Ah ok. Thank you for the reply :)
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 376
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    We aren't having kids, I hate kids, have better things to spend our money on and my condition can pass on

    Would rather pets than kids

    I dont have kids, but I dont hate kids

    I think making a statement like that is really sad. You were a child yourself once, do you think its appropriate to hate people just because they aren't an adult?
  • RednellRednell Posts: 2,528
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    Mine is a lifestyle choice. I have an aversion to children, I don't understand them, don't have the endless patience required, and can't be doing with the noise and mess and so ruled out having children very early on. I seem to be missing a mothering trait, so I would be a terrible parent and it wouldn't be fair on me or the child.

    While I'm unable to relate to your situation, I do wish you the very best.
  • Nat28Nat28 Posts: 2,949
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    Rednell wrote: »
    Mine is a lifestyle choice. I have an aversion to children, I don't understand them, don't have the endless patience required, and can't be doing with the noise and mess and so ruled out having children very early on. I seem to be missing a mothering trait, so I would be a terrible parent and it wouldn't be fair on me or the child.

    While I'm unable to relate to your situation, I do wish you the very best.

    Thanks . Thanks for being honest too :)
  • EbonyHamsterEbonyHamster Posts: 8,175
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    teardrop77 wrote: »
    I dont have kids, but I dont hate kids

    I think making a statement like that is really sad. You were a child yourself once, do you think its appropriate to hate people just because they aren't an adult?

    I can hate whomever or whatever I want tbh
  • Frankie_LittleFrankie_Little Posts: 9,271
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    I would love to have children one day but I've no idea if I'm able to. If I can't, I'd like to adopt, if I was considered suitable. I need to meet Mr Right first though, I wouldn't want to be a lone parent.
  • RednellRednell Posts: 2,528
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    Nat28 wrote: »
    Thanks . Thanks for being honest too :)

    No worries. I nearly put off answering because I felt you would possibly be looking for viewpoints from those who have been in a similar scenario, but then read your post again.

    There does seem to be a bit of a stunned reaction towards the childless by choice, and I imagine it's something some people can't get their head around? I reference some of the comments in reply to Ebony as an example. I was going into slightly more detail, why.
  • rbdcayrbdcay Posts: 12,041
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    Well I'm giving my opinion do if you don't like it, tough

    Well I don't like it so tough for you. My you do get unpleasant when people point out your true nature.
  • EbonyHamsterEbonyHamster Posts: 8,175
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    rbdcay wrote: »
    Well I don't like it so tough for you. My you do get unpleasant when people point out your true nature.

    Not really tough for me
  • rbdcayrbdcay Posts: 12,041
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    Not really tough for me

    I really don't care to be honest.

    I will leave you to hijacking the OPs thread as that seems to be your intention.

    I apologise OP for taking this further and will no longer disturb the flow of the discussion.
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