People without children
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[Deleted User]
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Just wondering how many people don't have children, either because they cant, or just don't want them?
Anyone wish they had decided to have them and now its too late?
Anyone wish they had decided to have them and now its too late?
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How do you feel about this yourself?
I would like them, but worried it might not happen so am wondering what peoples lives are like without them.
I would imagine they are easier and less stressful. But once you are old no one will be there to look after you.
Not a good reason to procreate though.
It depends what you want in old age, thankfully I don't have to worry.;-)
I don't have children - I'm a 34-year old male so I guess the opportunity hasn't disappeared completely, but it is highly unlikely that any mini-NorwoodCemeterys will appear.
I was part of the doomed Blair generation who went to Univerisity the year after grants were abolished, started working as UK house prices became utterly out of reach and started saving when Labour destroyed the principles of putting money by or building up a decent pension. I've found my adult life a constant struggle against the odds as I have had to completely finance everything myself (no money available from parents), and the thought of raising children simply hasn't entered my head.
However, I do think it is grossly unfair when society judges people who are without children - just because they choose not to/cannot produce offspring they are somehow seen as a 'failure' - why? Plus, UK society bends over backwards to help families wih children - subsidising childcare, prioritising people with kids in the workplace, providing tax breaks for families; but what about the hard-working single man? Where's his help?
My own personal opinion is that having kids is not a 'right'. People have kids, then moan at society for not doing enough. Blame teachers, blame the government, blame the disabled man who has the audacity to ask for the disabled space on the bus when a pram occupies it...
Your kids, your responsibility, your financial problem.
If you want children, then try for them at the most suitable time for all.
Those who decide not to have children I find are very happy in themselves and with their lives. I think if it's a clear decision not to have children, then there won't be any regrets.
It's an important decision either way.
No doubt as I get old and senile I will miss having descendants to wipe my arse, but a worthy trade off I'd say.
Haha, i don't think it's that simple is it. My 37 year old daughter and her partner have decided they don't want children and is probably very bemused indeed that her older brother and his wife have spent many years and effort and money on IVF . With some success. They have a darling little boy.
Horses for courses really. Parenthood is not for everyone. Thank goodness women can choose not to have children and not be. Regarded as odd. And more couples who cannot have children have options. It's a win win really.
It's a huge decision , decide wisely.
Plus, the argument that it gives you someone to care for you in your old age is no certainty. If my parents believe they've got a guaranteed carer in me when they get older they're set to be very disappointed. I'll visit them now and again and take them to lunch or something, but I'm not spending my life running around for them. Screw that.
But that is while they are children, once they are adults there are benefits.
What benefits can there be to having adult children? The only one I could think of is grandkids, which is just the same old crap when you're thirty years older (plus having kids so you can have grandkids seems pointless, just wait thirty years and adopt/foster or something).
I don't have children and I don't intend at this point having any, I don't see that changing.
Again it depends what you want in old age.
I was in a good job at the time which I did have the opportunity to go back to but it didn't work out as I was suffering post natal depression. I sometimes wonder to myself if I would have worked my way up in my career as many of my ex colleagues in the same position as me have done.
I wish I went on holidays with friends. Done some travelling etc. I've never been on a holiday that hasn't been with family. When I fell pregnant my boss took some of us away to Majorca for the weekend and I admit I was miserable the full time watching everyone else making use of the free bar and going out at night having a good time.
I wish I had a more stable relationship, marriage etc. I wish I wasn't bringing my child up as a single parent and to an irresponsible father.
But at the end of the day I took the risk to fall pregnant, I made the choice to have my baby and I would never change it. My daughter is my life and I would never hold a grudge against her for the things I've missed out on but I always advise people to make the most of their lives and enjoy themselves before thinking about having kids.
Well, some of them are quite good company.
With grandkids you just get the fun of them. Let mum and dad do all the boring stuff.