Around 5.30am this morning i heard someone banging at our front door repeatedly. I woke up my husband who was half asleep and told me to ignore it. I then heard a car being guided up the road and think it may have been our neighbour trying to get his car past my husbands as our road is quite old and people double park all the time.
This morning there was a note on my husbands car window that simply said you ****ing prick. My husband just brushed it of but it has scared me as it this is the neighbour i think it is he looks really scary and i would not want to fall out with him.
I am now too scared to go home tonight in case he comes round and it is my work christmas party aswell tonight and I don't feel I can go and enjoy it now.
I am not sure what anyone can advise I just wanted to talk about it. my husband is so stubborn he really is not bothered about the note and has advised will park there again later!
I would like to go back to Flyboy152. They point out that this is harrassment and the OP should call the Police; this is not harrassment.
Someone knocked on the door at 5.30. OP did not look out - she actually did not see who was knocking.
She heard a car being driven slowly in the road - she did not see the car and therefore could not identify it.
There was a note on the windscreen - unsigned and she did not see anyone leave it there.
Was this the actions of one person or three? We don't know because she did not see anything. How can you now say that her neighbour is the one responsible? It is all supposition.
Yes it probably was him - but no proof whatsoever.
As a by the by I too would have been furious if someone had blocked my car in at 5.30 in the morning. A bit of common courtesy goes a long way between neighbours.
Maybe the neighbour went round and done them both in!!!!
And in relation flyboy going on about harassment. It's not.
Harassment has to be a course of conduct on 2 separate occasions. This is one incident.
Police could consider alarm or distress in relation to the note under the public order act, but to be honest if they were called about this it would be a local police community support officer popping down and having a quiet word.
Our neighbour approached my husband saturday to ask if he had an issue with him (he basically thought he had parked there deliberately as he had a problem with him) my husband explained that when he parked there was no car opposite him and there was no malice intended, he did not realise another car had come along and parked opposite him later that night. He explained that the reason he had had to park there was because we could not get round the back to park where we normally park and someone had parked in front of our house and there was literally nowhere else to park on the street.
He was ok and agreed that the parking in our street is a pain.
So all over and done with. Thanks for all the advice. There were things that could have been done differently on both parties sides but my post was not really about the parking and who was to blame or not to blame. It was about the fact that i was worried for my husband as was worried that this neighbour was going to get aggressive with him after seeing the note which thankfully he did not. My husband was annoyed in the morning which is why he said he would park there again but as we all know we all say things in the heat of the moment and he did not park there again.
Our neighbour approached my husband saturday to ask if he had an issue with him (he basically thought he had parked there deliberately as he had a problem with him) my husband explained that when he parked there was no car opposite him and there was no malice intended, he did not realise another car had come along and parked opposite him later that night. He explained that the reason he had had to park there was because we could not get round the back to park where we normally park and someone had parked in front of our house and there was literally nowhere else to park on the street.
He was ok and agreed that the parking in our street is a pain.
So all over and done with. Thanks for all the advice. There were things that could have been done differently on both parties sides but my post was not really about the parking and who was to blame or not to blame. It was about the fact that i was worried for my husband as was worried that this neighbour was going to get aggressive with him after seeing the note which thankfully he did not. My husband was annoyed in the morning which is why he said he would park there again but as we all know we all say things in the heat of the moment and he did not park there again.
One thing to learn from it is, as many of us have said on this thread, they key is communication. Getting angry and riling up more just leads to an unhappy neighbourhood. An apology and explanation even if you don't think you were the one who caused it can stop a lot of bad feeling.
Glad it worked out well in the end, seems the neighbour didn't want it to escalate.
One thing to learn from it is, as many of us have said on this thread, they key is communication. Getting angry and riling up more just leads to an unhappy neighbourhood. An apology and explanation even if you don't think you were the one who caused it can stop a lot of bad feeling.
Glad it worked out well in the end, seems the neighbour didn't want it to escalate.
How is that going to help the next time there is neighbourly dispute. Are you suggesting that rolling over and accepting blame, when it was someone elses fault, will be productive the next time someone has a go. It sends out the message that you are fair game, every time someone wants to get their way.
How is that going to help the next time there is neighbourly dispute. Are you suggesting that rolling over and accepting blame, when it was someone elses fault, will be productive the next time someone has a go. It sends out the message that you are fair game, every time someone wants to get their way.
A simple apology because yours was one of the cars blocking and an explanation as to why. That is not rolling over, but it is keeping the peace. Just because you weren't the first to put the car there, doesn't mean you didn't inadvertently cause a problem.
Yes it is harassmant. The neighbour caused alarm and distress on at least two occasions, that is harassment.
Rubbish. People like you do no favours for those who are really being harassed. I suggest you get your dictionary out and look at the real meaning of the word.
How is that going to help the next time there is neighbourly dispute. Are you suggesting that rolling over and accepting blame, when it was someone elses fault, will be productive the next time someone has a go. It sends out the message that you are fair game, every time someone wants to get their way.
You must be a barrel of fun to be neighbours with.
As OP said, its a bit of give and take regarding parking and both parties recognise that and have kissed and made up.
Rubbish. People like you do no favours for those who are really being harassed. I suggest you get your dictionary out and look at the real meaning of the word.
Writing "peopel like you......" has never ever been an effective method of debate.
I am just curious, what do you guys think 'double parking' is?
As I understand it, it is parking parallel to someone already parked against the kerb, in which case only one car is ever double parked, the one that got there second. Double parking is not parking on the opposite kerb.
May not be the best example, but see here... http://news.bbc.co.uk/local/bristol/hi/people_and_places/newsid_8333000/8333321.stm
I am just curious, what do you guys think 'double parking' is?
As I understand it, it is parking parallel to someone already parked against the kerb, in which case only one car is ever double parked, the one that got there second. Double parking is not parking on the opposite kerb.
May not be the best example, but see here... http://news.bbc.co.uk/local/bristol/hi/people_and_places/newsid_8333000/8333321.stm
yeah, I noticed that, however being even more pedantic, parking on the opposite side of the road to a parked car, against the kerb, is not double parking
yeah, I noticed that, however being even more pedantic, parking on the opposite side of the road to a parked car, against the kerb, is not double parking
This was brought up earlier in the thread. No, it's not the true definition of double parking but think we all realise that she means either side of the road where it is too narrow to rightly do it.
This was brought up earlier in the thread. No, it's not the true definition of double parking but think we all realise that she means either side of the road where it is too narrow to rightly do it.
But it wasn't too narrow, the neighbour got his car out, without the need to move any other cars.
This was brought up earlier in the thread. No, it's not the true definition of double parking but think we all realise that she means either side of the road where it is too narrow to rightly do it.
An ignorant woman actually parked across the old lady next door's drive so her son couldn't park on it one night a couple of weeks ago - I mean actually across her dropped kerb.
OH was so angry he called the local police (not emergency number) and asked them if they could do something, they said they would try to trace the owner and call them, 10 minutes later she came out the house she was visiting to move it so it looks like they did find her. I did go out and have a go at her, I couldn't believe someone could be that thick.
Inconsiderate parking is an absolute pain and I can see why the neighbour of the OP was annoyed, I'm sure he's not going to go round and deck anybody, but people do get angry when they can't move their cars.
The same sort of thing happened to me a couple of weeks ago. I live on a main road and we have a drive on which both my husband's car and mine are parked. I had an emergency call from a member of my family and I had to get to them straight away and some inconsiderate so and so had parked right across our drive, meaning that I couldn't get my car out at all. I had to contact my husband to come and fetch me and collect me. I missed seeing a much loved member of my family dying because of this and TBH if that car had been there when I got back later that night, I would have left the same type of message on it..
On the other hand I have lived in a road where it was nearly impossible to park in the evenings and it would take a crow bar to get your car out some mornings and it is frustrating to say the least, there's wrong on both sides I feel.
Along with what other posters have said here, I would just knock the door and say sorry that it happened and leave it at that. I also hate confrontation, so can understand your distress, but it's easier just to say a quick sorry than leave it to blow up into a major confrontation.
ETA: Just read your last post and you've sorted it out, nice one!
Reading between the lines, I think the neighbour has been frustrated by this for a while and has had other issues before. He was wrong to write the abusive note, however. This abusive note didn't say 'I'm going to get you later', so feel it was written in a fit of frustration.
If you have to double park, then have the courtesy to move your car, even if someone else has double parked too - maybe he knocked on their door and got ignored by them too. If it was that icy, you don't want them to risk hitting your or someone else's car.
It is essential to have courtesy and consideration if the neighbourhood is that congested.
I know this is an old thread and glad it didn't escalate.
Comments
/ good example of debate
10: begin advice
20: set advice = OP should not allow partner to park inconsiderately in future
30: goto 10
/ advice given; resume debate
I would like to go back to Flyboy152. They point out that this is harrassment and the OP should call the Police; this is not harrassment.
Someone knocked on the door at 5.30. OP did not look out - she actually did not see who was knocking.
She heard a car being driven slowly in the road - she did not see the car and therefore could not identify it.
There was a note on the windscreen - unsigned and she did not see anyone leave it there.
Was this the actions of one person or three? We don't know because she did not see anything. How can you now say that her neighbour is the one responsible? It is all supposition.
Yes it probably was him - but no proof whatsoever.
As a by the by I too would have been furious if someone had blocked my car in at 5.30 in the morning. A bit of common courtesy goes a long way between neighbours.
Any chance of an update OP?
And in relation flyboy going on about harassment. It's not.
Harassment has to be a course of conduct on 2 separate occasions. This is one incident.
Police could consider alarm or distress in relation to the note under the public order act, but to be honest if they were called about this it would be a local police community support officer popping down and having a quiet word.
Our neighbour approached my husband saturday to ask if he had an issue with him (he basically thought he had parked there deliberately as he had a problem with him) my husband explained that when he parked there was no car opposite him and there was no malice intended, he did not realise another car had come along and parked opposite him later that night. He explained that the reason he had had to park there was because we could not get round the back to park where we normally park and someone had parked in front of our house and there was literally nowhere else to park on the street.
He was ok and agreed that the parking in our street is a pain.
So all over and done with. Thanks for all the advice. There were things that could have been done differently on both parties sides but my post was not really about the parking and who was to blame or not to blame. It was about the fact that i was worried for my husband as was worried that this neighbour was going to get aggressive with him after seeing the note which thankfully he did not. My husband was annoyed in the morning which is why he said he would park there again but as we all know we all say things in the heat of the moment and he did not park there again.
One thing to learn from it is, as many of us have said on this thread, they key is communication. Getting angry and riling up more just leads to an unhappy neighbourhood. An apology and explanation even if you don't think you were the one who caused it can stop a lot of bad feeling.
Glad it worked out well in the end, seems the neighbour didn't want it to escalate.
How is that going to help the next time there is neighbourly dispute. Are you suggesting that rolling over and accepting blame, when it was someone elses fault, will be productive the next time someone has a go. It sends out the message that you are fair game, every time someone wants to get their way.
A simple apology because yours was one of the cars blocking and an explanation as to why. That is not rolling over, but it is keeping the peace. Just because you weren't the first to put the car there, doesn't mean you didn't inadvertently cause a problem.
Rubbish. People like you do no favours for those who are really being harassed. I suggest you get your dictionary out and look at the real meaning of the word.
You must be a barrel of fun to be neighbours with.
As OP said, its a bit of give and take regarding parking and both parties recognise that and have kissed and made up.
Writing "peopel like you......" has never ever been an effective method of debate.
I'm quite a jolly chap, once you get to know me.
As I understand it, it is parking parallel to someone already parked against the kerb, in which case only one car is ever double parked, the one that got there second. Double parking is not parking on the opposite kerb.
May not be the best example, but see here...
http://news.bbc.co.uk/local/bristol/hi/people_and_places/newsid_8333000/8333321.stm
Sadly a concept lost on some.
This was brought up earlier in the thread. No, it's not the true definition of double parking but think we all realise that she means either side of the road where it is too narrow to rightly do it.
But it wasn't too narrow, the neighbour got his car out, without the need to move any other cars.
By getting someone else up to guide him.
If you need assistance to get through it's too narrow, a larger vehicle wouldn't get through.
Ah sorry, I missed it
The same sort of thing happened to me a couple of weeks ago. I live on a main road and we have a drive on which both my husband's car and mine are parked. I had an emergency call from a member of my family and I had to get to them straight away and some inconsiderate so and so had parked right across our drive, meaning that I couldn't get my car out at all. I had to contact my husband to come and fetch me and collect me. I missed seeing a much loved member of my family dying because of this and TBH if that car had been there when I got back later that night, I would have left the same type of message on it..
On the other hand I have lived in a road where it was nearly impossible to park in the evenings and it would take a crow bar to get your car out some mornings and it is frustrating to say the least, there's wrong on both sides I feel.
Along with what other posters have said here, I would just knock the door and say sorry that it happened and leave it at that. I also hate confrontation, so can understand your distress, but it's easier just to say a quick sorry than leave it to blow up into a major confrontation.
ETA: Just read your last post and you've sorted it out, nice one!
The neighbour was not averse to doing the exact same thing though and no one thought it worth all this aggro,so the OP can't be blamed alone.
Op you're not still frightened of going out are you? You're very quiet.
If you have to double park, then have the courtesy to move your car, even if someone else has double parked too - maybe he knocked on their door and got ignored by them too. If it was that icy, you don't want them to risk hitting your or someone else's car.
It is essential to have courtesy and consideration if the neighbourhood is that congested.
I know this is an old thread and glad it didn't escalate.
A simple
- deleted -
would suffice