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Greatest ever lines in Soaps

owen10owen10 Posts: 127,999
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in Soaps #1
I have always loved the lines in soaps when they are funny and that is when the writing is at its best The best lines ever is when Den gave the divorce papers to Angie when he went Happy Christmas Ange and in Coronation Street where Stan went What does that lipstick taste of and Hilda went Woman Stanley Woman
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    Pink_SmurfPink_Smurf Posts: 6,883
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    #2
    The one that stands out to me was Eastenders' Janine in her exit scene when she was asked what she'd been doing and she replied "Getting away with murder".
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    Get Den WattsGet Den Watts Posts: 6,039
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    #3
    "He's a looney and she's a man" - Blanche's take on the Croppers

    "Do your worst PC Plod and Peter Potato" - Nick Cotton to Pete Beale after Pete beat him up and the cop did nothing
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    rfonzorfonzo Posts: 11,772
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    #4
    When Gail said to Richard Hillman 'You're mad. You're Norman Bates with a briefcase.':D
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    Get Den WattsGet Den Watts Posts: 6,039
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    #5
    rfonzo wrote: »
    When Gail said to Richard Hillman 'You're mad. You're Norman Bates with a briefcase.':D

    Gail's delivery of that line was phenomenal.
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    fawltytowers93fawltytowers93 Posts: 1,872
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    #6
    "I just bumped into Lucy and battered her"
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    JayDee279JayDee279 Posts: 3,089
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    #7
    Benny from Crossroads .... "Shall I give Miss Diane a carrot?"
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    dee123dee123 Posts: 46,271
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    #8
    Oh. No. Poor. Libby.

    Oh wait, you said greatest.
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    Renegade MasterRenegade Master Posts: 913
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    #9
    Gail Platt - 'Oh here we go ..... The rest of the village people'
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    Fergie86Fergie86 Posts: 7,967
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    #10
    dee123 wrote: »
    Oh. No. Poor. Libby.

    Oh wait, you said greatest.

    Worse delivery of a line ever, there was no emotion or anything from Bridget considering she had just found out Libby had suffered a miscarriage, terrible acting. Personal favourite is Bubbly in the fridge and the total OTT reaction that followed it.
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    Pink_SmurfPink_Smurf Posts: 6,883
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    #11
    rfonzo wrote: »
    When Gail said to Richard Hillman 'You're mad. You're Norman Bates with a briefcase.':D

    Brilliant. She does come out with some good ones. I missed this particular episode.
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    dee123dee123 Posts: 46,271
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    #12
    Fergie86 wrote: »
    Worse delivery of a line ever, there was no emotion or anything from Bridget considering she had just found out Libby had suffered a miscarriage, terrible acting. Personal favourite is Bubbly in the fridge and the total OTT reaction that followed it.

    Was that DS's first "FFS get rid of..." thread? I remember seeing get rid of Bridget/Didge comments being EVERYWHERE at the time when i was lurking around here and hadn't joined yet.
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    KieranDSKieranDS Posts: 16,545
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    #13
    Stan Carter to Aunt Babe - "It stinks worse than your nether regions on a hot day."
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    cezzycezzy Posts: 4,840
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    #14
    Zoe: "Youre not my mother"
    Kat: "Yes I am!"

    Loved those lines;-)
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    FizzbinFizzbin Posts: 36,827
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    #15
    Bubbly's in the fridge!
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    RobertfitzRobertfitz Posts: 2,732
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    #16
    "My son is in the kitchen eating a biscuit"

    Iconic
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    vaslav37vaslav37 Posts: 69,555
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    #17
    I loved Roy's Mum in Corrie

    'I am not a Tsunami Roy, I'm your Mother!'
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    bwfcolbwfcol Posts: 13,696
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    #18
    If only he'd worn slip on shoes :D
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    cyrilandshirleycyrilandshirley Posts: 48,569
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    #19
    "What is it wi' me and trams?"
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    Lady VoldemortLady Voldemort Posts: 10,088
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    #20
    Corrie's Blanche had the best lines.

    He looks like he should be crayoning something and no fella that wears women's underwear is going anywhere near my flesh and blood.

    Peter: It didn't make Tracy hit the bottle.
    Blanche: No but it did make her hit her boyfriend with a blunt instrument.

    :D

    Bless him, EE Roy didn't get many memorable lines but his simple "I don't like your earrings" always cracks me up lol.
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    bean_of_sbbean_of_sb Posts: 7,841
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    #21
    She's about as Jewish as a bacon sandwich!

    Blanche had the best lines! 'She had roots as blac as her soul!' God she is missed on the street!
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    thengp12thengp12 Posts: 5,671
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    #22
    You need slappin' daaaan

    Masterpiece it really was
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    rollockingbatrollockingbat Posts: 1,038
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    #23
    Maya Sharma: (about Sunita) “And what did she have, that I didn't? A brain tumour. It's not love, it's Munchausen's by proxy."

    Liz McDonald: (on her new dress) "It's for my job interview."
    Tracy Barlow: "Oh! What's the job?"
    Blanche Hunt: "Prostitute."
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    jxbrennajxbrenna Posts: 977
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    #24
    thengp12 wrote: »
    You need slappin' daaaan

    Masterpiece it really was

    The Wrench and the really un-scary stare made it!
    id be more scared of the air around me than Ben in that scene :D:D
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    cyrilandshirleycyrilandshirley Posts: 48,569
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    #25
    Lady Voldemort wrote: »
    Corrie's Blanche had the best lines.

    He looks like he should be crayoning something and no fella that wears women's underwear is going anywhere near my flesh and blood.

    Peter: It didn't make Tracy hit the bottle.
    Blanche: No but it did make her hit her boyfriend with a blunt instrument.

    :D
    rollockingbat wrote: »
    Liz McDonald: (on her new dress) "It's for my job interview."
    Tracy Barlow: "Oh! What's the job?"
    Blanche Hunt: "Prostitute."


    Oh Blanche! :D:cry: She was absolutely amazing. Desperately missed.
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    annielouannielou Posts: 10,247
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    #26
    Another Blanche one:

    Peter is taking his temperature and she says something like, oh that thermometers rectal, but don't worry it's been through the wash.

    Peter's face!!
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