Wedding Guest Attire...need something fab!

[Deleted User] · 12/10/08 - 18:10

My soon to be ex sister in law is getting married in a few months and is being a right Bridezilla as is my Monster in Law and the Groom!

...anyway have been told/warned (in a veiled jokey way by MIL and the Groom) not to dress up too much as they don't want the bride upstaged (according to MIL the original dress purchased for the Bridesmaid had to be returned as next to the bride she looked too nice!!!!!!), tbh I am rather miffed off by this....I should be able to wear what I want seeing as I'm paying for clothing for me, my children, 2 nights in a hotel, time off work, presents, hen weekend etc....so I am going for it, big time and need ideas on where to look for a showstopper!!!

When I got married, I was like "Wear what you like" and I had no secrets.....this is like the bloody Secret Service and the Fashion Police rolled into one!!:D

System · 12/10/08 - 18:11

If you dislike the family this much, why go?

[Deleted User] · 12/10/08 - 18:20

I love them! But they are being really funny about everything.....I mentioned a colour the other day that I'd like to wear to be told "No, you can't!" (because it was one of the theme colours and that I look like Wedding Party if I did!!!!...I had no idea prior to this as it is all top secret) I just feel like it's a bit insane, I want to be there to celebrate with them, but I am not dressing like a frump to keep anybody else happy!

I feel a bit horrid now.......

I went to my friend's wedding last year and had a beautiful full gown....when I showed SIL the pics, she said I'd better not wear suchlike at her wedding cause my outfit was too nice!! AT the time, I thought she was joking, but it seems she wasn't!

System · 12/10/08 - 18:26

I'd suggest going wild on the Debenhams website, or ASOS for something a bit different. There's tonnes of american websites that go all out on dresses, depends if you want to go to the hassle of getting it shipped though!

[Deleted User] · 12/10/08 - 18:31

Thanks Lolla!!:)

I have just found a designer Jim Hjelm on-line and the designs are stunning!

I will look at the ones you reccomended too!

Cheers!

[Deleted User] · 12/10/08 - 18:32

Crikey, she sounds really insecure...i spose it's normal for the bride to want to be the one with the biggest wow factor but it's a shame she's worried that she won't look nice next to everyone else.

It must be really annoying for you but if it was someone i loved i think i'd look for something elegant and understated, and be super-nice by (probably) being the only one not to slag her off at the reception when everyone else is moaning about her dress code!

[Deleted User] · 12/10/08 - 18:36

henders wrote: »

Crikey, she sounds really insecure...i spose it's normal for the bride to want to be the one with the biggest wow factor but it's a shame she's worried that she won't look nice next to everyone else.

It must be really annoying for you but if it was someone i loved i think i'd look for something elegant and understated, and be super-nice by (probably) being the only one not to slag her off at the reception when everyone else is moaning about her dress code!

Hi henders!

Yep, It's all a bit hysterical!

I wasn't planning LAS VEGAS showgirl or anything like that, just full length and fabulous in a classy way...I was even warned not to get a fascinator (fancy head band ) that is too bling as the bride is having only a diamante and pearl combslide!!:rolleyes:

No wonder I'm divorcing him....and them!:D:D:D

[Deleted User] · 12/10/08 - 19:10

That's really sad. You mentioned that your MIL was talking about it as well, do you reckon she's making things worse by saying things about other people looking better than the bride? Maybe her time would be better spent reassuring her daughter that no-one will outshine her on her special day :mad:

At this rate everyone will be so defensive about what they're wearing that they won't even notice the wedding dress!

System · 12/10/08 - 19:11

I'd go for something simple and well cut but get a fantastic pair of shoes (there's so many great ones about just now). Also don't bother with a fascinator, spend the money on getting your hair done.

Do you think they've been telling everyone the same thing?

[Deleted User] · 12/10/08 - 19:15

You say you love them and then say you're divorcing them - to be honest don't try and go all out - it's not your day - you had yours and whilst you say you didn't mind what people wore (and I was the same) she obviously does so if you do care about them why not go along with it - just because you go for something a bit simpler (def not a full length ball gown!!!) doesn't mean it has to be frumpy

[Deleted User] · 12/10/08 - 20:51

Charlie Coo wrote: »

You say you love them and then say you're divorcing them - to be honest don't try and go all out - it's not your day - you had yours and whilst you say you didn't mind what people wore (and I was the same) she obviously does so if you do care about them why not go along with it - just because you go for something a bit simpler (def not a full length ball gown!!!) doesn't mean it has to be frumpy

I am divorcing my husband not them, it was my attempt at humour, which again is not well recieved

:D

BTW, He is still a good friend but the love thang is gone!:(

I am not talking a frou frou meringue prom number, something classy and bohemian style full length or long and strappy but something that makes me feel and look good....my SIL on MY wedding day was not given a dress code, so why does she have to make such a fuss?

She wore TWO fab dresses on MY day and she looked beautiful, I was proud to have her as my guest...shame that can't be understood and reciprocated on her day, really!

I think that she/groom and mil are getting carried away, tbh!

cheers for the advice though:)

[Deleted User] · 12/10/08 - 20:54

henders wrote: »

That's really sad. You mentioned that your MIL was talking about it as well, do you reckon she's making things worse by saying things about other people looking better than the bride? Maybe her time would be better spent reassuring her daughter that no-one will outshine her on her special day :mad:

At this rate everyone will be so defensive about what they're wearing that they won't even notice the wedding dress!

Agreed!

I did point this to the MIL, by stating that it would be pretty obvious who is wearing the wedding dress, by all accounts it is "very different" and "rather surprising", but the colour/style/length remain a tightly kept secret!

[Deleted User] · 12/10/08 - 20:58

henders wrote: »

That's really sad. You mentioned that your MIL was talking about it as well, do you reckon she's making things worse by saying things about other people looking better than the bride? Maybe her time would be better spent reassuring her daughter that no-one will outshine her on her special day :mad:

At this rate everyone will be so defensive about what they're wearing that they won't even notice the wedding dress!

Agreed!

I did point this to the MIL, by stating that it be pretty obvious who is wearing the wedding dress, by all accounts it is "very different" and "rather surprising", but the colour/style/length remain a tightly kept secret!

I think she (MIL) may have mentioned similar to her Sister's Daughter as she has mentioned her neice's liking of all things fashion too and how she likes to dress up!:D

[Deleted User] · 12/10/08 - 21:14

She sounds very insecure - I think you should get something lovely that also goes with their wishes that you feel great in - there are so many cool dresses out there that it should be easy enough to please everyone - at the end of the day it's her day and I'm sure you wouldn't want to upset her. Coast and Monsoon are good for wedding gear

[Deleted User] · 12/10/08 - 21:32

A bride can never be outstaged - it's her day, everyone is looking at her

I don't like people wearing cream or white to a wedding, but that is just my own opinion, wear what you feel comfortable in that way you can relax and make the best of the situation.

[Deleted User] · 12/10/08 - 23:00

Charlie Coo wrote: »

She sounds very insecure - I think you should get something lovely that also goes with their wishes that you feel great in - there are so many cool dresses out there that it should be easy enough to please everyone - at the end of the day it's her day and I'm sure you wouldn't want to upset her. Coast and Monsoon are good for wedding gear

Charlie, I have decided I will have a chat with her....and explain my feelings regarding the situation in the nicest possible way and that how I was happy with the two choices that she made at my wedding (not that my opinion was ever enforced anyway!) and that I would prefer to make my own choices!

Smutbucket, I wore cream last year, but it was also embellished with oyster, champagne, silver and cream beadwork and the bride loved it!! I bought that dress and another in black (just in case) and showed the bride prior, she said to go with the cream as it was more striking and would photograph better!

Maybe I will do that again and then ask the SIL!:)

Thanks !

[Deleted User] · 13/10/08 - 09:38

Good idea Hoxton - I'm sure you'll look lovely

[Deleted User] · 13/10/08 - 09:50

I love THIS Dress

Would something like this be unacceptable to them!?

System · 13/10/08 - 10:08

I'd be completely brow beaten by now and go dressed completely in black. Oh but even then the bride would think you're attention seeking. Does the bride not see any positivity in the fact that her bloke wants to marry her? Or is she completely ****ed up?

[Deleted User] · 13/10/08 - 10:29

SweetyPie2006 wrote: »

I love THIS Dress

Would something like this be unacceptable to them!?

That is a stunning dress, Sweety Pie!

.....but that neckline would make me look like a cyclops boobied monster!

I have lost over 5 stone this year and I am slim now but my breasts are still very fullsome!!! So that would make me look like one giant breasticle on sticks!!!:D

I am better in a v neck or plunge neck line....not too low, however!:eek:

[Deleted User] · 13/10/08 - 10:47

lambing wrote: »

I'd be completely brow beaten by now and go dressed completely in black. Oh but even then the bride would think you're attention seeking. Does the bride not see any positivity in the fact that her bloke wants to marry her? Or is she completely ****ed up?

What about a Gurkha?!:D

I am now thinking, but not wishing to ask......but I think it may be down to the fact she has gained some weight over the past three years.....her bloke is always telling her how fab she is though and she looks very happy and she still has quite some time to lose the excess (which she has lost a fair portion of recently and he has never seen her skinny, just curvy but she always looks really good) Also when she saw my weight loss (we don't see each other much as lives some distance away) she just kept looking me up and down, but she never said well done or anything!:(

I feel whatever my choice is, that they won't be happy so I think I will choose two outfits and see what the MIL says, at least that way I will have two outfits that I love and that will suit me, but they get their own way (sort of!) by being allowed to have the final say!

:D

CabbagesAhoy! · 13/10/08 - 10:55

HoxtonHoney wrote: »

That is a stunning dress, Sweety Pie!

.....but that neckline would make me look like a cyclops boobied monster!

I have lost over 5 stone this year and I am slim now but my breasts are still very fullsome!!! So that would make me look like one giant breasticle on sticks!!!:D

I am better in a v neck or plunge neck line....not too low, however!:eek:

cyclops boobied moster!

I know exactly what you mean!

[Deleted User] · 13/10/08 - 10:58

CabbagesAhoy! wrote: »

cyclops boobied moster! I know exactly what you mean!

Tits enter the room ten minutes before the rest of me!:D

Hey there!

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Wedding Guest Attire...need something fab!

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