What's the silliest thing you have ever said out loud?

[Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 81
Forum Member
I asked once what the score was to a particular football game.
The answer came 1 - all (1-1)
To which I replied "who to?"
DOH
I am neither blonde or senior!!!
But clearly a bit of a 'DIV' at times! :o
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Comments

  • Lily_MLily_M Posts: 1,328
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    "I love you" - to a bloke who was a complete knob.
  • KittiaraKittiara Posts: 2,001
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    Oh, there have been many things! But the one thing to come to mind straight away is:

    I'd lost quite a bit of weight and had several items of clothing that were too large for me. My partner's brother and his girlfriend stopped by, and I thought she might like the clothes. Without thinking, I told her, "Oh I have these tops and jeans for you to try! They're much too baggy for me now, but I'm sure they will fit you, as you're bigger than me."

    Nice and tactful... and I didn't mean it like that at all. I've had weight issues most of my life and been insecure about it. As it slipped out of my mouth I cringed, but the damage was done, of course.
  • AnitaSAnitaS Posts: 4,079
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    I asked an old workmate, who I hadn't seen for a couple of years, when her baby was due. It wasn't. She had just put on weight. :o I still cringe about it now.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 81
    Forum Member
    Kittiara wrote: »
    Oh, there have been many things! But the one thing to come to mind straight away is:

    I'd lost quite a bit of weight and had several items of clothing that were too large for me. My partner's brother and his girlfriend stopped by, and I thought she might like the clothes. Without thinking, I told her, "Oh I have these tops and jeans for you to try! They're much too baggy for me now, but I'm sure they will fit you, as you're bigger than me."

    Nice and tactful... and I didn't mean it like that at all. I've had weight issues most of my life and been insecure about it. As it slipped out of my mouth I cringed, but the damage was done, of course.
    Awww :o I asked someone when the baby was due....
    She wasn't pregnant!!! Opps:o
  • CroctacusCroctacus Posts: 18,216
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    Hello.


    Into an airvent in a packed lift.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 81
    Forum Member
    AnitaS wrote: »
    I asked an old workmate, who I hadn't seen for a couple of years, when her baby was due. It wasn't. She had just put on weight. :o I still cringe about it now.

    :D Me too.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 5,692
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    "gjdfhsykufljlkvchxydufjstgihbvcdz"

    I think I was two years old at the time.
  • U96U96 Posts: 13,937
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    At work.On the tannoy for a minutes silence for Lady Di's funeral.
    I shouted out 'shove it up your ass mofo!'.The entire office just stared at me.Toadies!.
  • Penny CrayonPenny Crayon Posts: 36,158
    Forum Member
    We have a fish and chip shop - one of the customers is a farmer who is a regular customer. During harvesting he came in accompanied my a few others (some of them his kids) - my husband said

    'Is this your oldest lad?'

    the person in question replied

    'No - I'm his wife,
  • netcurtainsnetcurtains Posts: 23,494
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    "You can't divide 150 by 3".
  • hustedhusted Posts: 5,287
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    U96 wrote: »
    At work.On the tannoy for a minutes silence for Lady Di's funeral.
    I shouted out 'shove it up your ass mofo!'.The entire office just stared at me.Toadies!.

    Did the Toadies sack you?
  • Landdrifter24Landdrifter24 Posts: 206
    Forum Member
    When i started college our tutor wrote something on the whiteboard and spelt it horrible, so me being how i was in those days shouted in the most condescending tone "are you dyslexic" or words to that effect, to which he replied "actually, yes i am"

    Shut me right up... and i can happily say i have now grown up.

    He did get his own back on me though, by nicknaming me wetspot for 2 years after i stupidly told him about a nightclub incident that happened over that weekend. :o
  • U96U96 Posts: 13,937
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    husted wrote: »
    Did the Toadies sack you?

    Nah.It was just an Orangeman security guard who decided to pledge his allegiance to the Royals with an unauthorised broadcast.So i got away with it.
  • My Sweet LifeMy Sweet Life Posts: 1,434
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    To someone I knew years ago: "Oh my God, you look awful! Really dreadful! Are you all right?" - it turned out she wasn't wearing any makeup and that was the first time I was seeing her au natural, so to speak. :o:o:o:o
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 806
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    I asked whether unscented talcum powder could be used as a substitute for plain flour, and on a separate occasion asked if Conan the barbarian was a friend of Jesus. I missed 2 years of school, I blame it all on that.
  • MuzeMuze Posts: 2,225
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    I once found myself saying, "No the c*ck is the smaller one!" rather loud on a bus - I was telling someone which of some chickens was the cockerel (he was the bantam!) :D
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 81
    Forum Member
    We have a fish and chip shop - one of the customers is a farmer who is a regular customer. During harvesting he came in accompanied my a few others (some of them his kids) - my husband said

    'Is this your oldest lad?'

    the person in question replied

    'No - I'm his wife,

    Ouchh :o
  • AnitaSAnitaS Posts: 4,079
    Forum Member
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    We have a fish and chip shop - one of the customers is a farmer who is a regular customer. During harvesting he came in accompanied my a few others (some of them his kids) - my husband said

    'Is this your oldest lad?'

    the person in question replied

    'No - I'm his wife,
    Something similar happened where I work. One of my friends was in the ladies, washing her hands, and this person walked in. My friend said "You're in the wrong toilet, the gents is on the floor above this one".

    The person wasn't a man.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 81
    Forum Member
    "You can't divide 150 by 3".

    Welcome to my world of 'DIV!' :D
  • 21stCenturyBoy21stCenturyBoy Posts: 44,493
    Forum Member
    My flatmate was looking for her phone and asked me to ring it from my room to see if she could find it.

    I rang it, she picked it up, and I said "have you found it?", to which she replied "no, I'm still looking". As if me not realizing at that point wasn't bad enough, I added "Okay, do you want me to call it again?"

    I was obviously not at my best, that day.
  • CaldariCaldari Posts: 5,890
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    I complimented a drag artist on her make-up once, only to find out it wasn't a actually a drag artist.
  • James FrederickJames Frederick Posts: 53,184
    Forum Member
    I used to get bulled and beat up a lot so one day when the bloke was going to do it my only response was.

    "I've had my arse kicked by bigger and badder people than you you know"

    It sounded good in my head but sounded stupid when I said it it was supposed to mean that even if he did hit me I had gotten up and been ok from worse beatings so it didn't really matter
  • U96U96 Posts: 13,937
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    We have a fish and chip shop - one of the customers is a farmer who is a regular customer. During harvesting he came in accompanied my a few others (some of them his kids) - my husband said

    'Is this your oldest lad?'

    the person in question replied

    'No - I'm his wife,

    Off topic.Do you ever get pissed off with customers who don't say please and thank you?.Hear that in my local chippy all the time and it annoys me how people can be so rude.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 1,442
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    "You know how you can press Control & F in Word to find something... is there a way to do that in Excel?"
    To which my colleague wordlessly presses Ctrl & F on my keyboard. :cry:
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 81
    Forum Member
    msmasood wrote: »
    I asked whether unscented talcum powder could be used as a substitute for plain flour, and on a separate occasion asked if Conan the barbarian was a friend of Jesus. I missed 2 years of school, I blame it all on that.

    Soo funny!!!
    Did you ever try the talcum theory?
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