Funeral attire/etiquette
I have a funeral coming up and am a bit confused about what to wear, what to say etc.
Ive been to funerals before but they were different. The only funerals ive attended were two of my grandparents. At my nans she had requested people wear her favourite colour so that wasnt an issue. Plus with her being my relation there didnt seem any pressure to get it right.
The funeral i will be attending is a relation of my partners and what i gather will be a traditional religious service and burial.
I know you are supposed to wear black but i dont know if black trousers, black blouse and a black jacket is too much. But then i dont know if wearing a white blouse would look too officey and disrespectful?
Also im not sure what you are supposed to do or say? At nans funeral i remember people talking to me but i dont remember what they were saying. But i do remember knowing them. At this funeral i only know the close relatives.
Ive been to funerals before but they were different. The only funerals ive attended were two of my grandparents. At my nans she had requested people wear her favourite colour so that wasnt an issue. Plus with her being my relation there didnt seem any pressure to get it right.
The funeral i will be attending is a relation of my partners and what i gather will be a traditional religious service and burial.
I know you are supposed to wear black but i dont know if black trousers, black blouse and a black jacket is too much. But then i dont know if wearing a white blouse would look too officey and disrespectful?
Also im not sure what you are supposed to do or say? At nans funeral i remember people talking to me but i dont remember what they were saying. But i do remember knowing them. At this funeral i only know the close relatives.
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Comments
As for what to say, just stick to: 'So sorry for your loss', 'It was a lovely service' etc.
What ever coat you have to hand really.
The service is kind of the sombre/hard one to get through. My cousin started crying - she was pregnant/hormonal but it set me off. Afterwards, where we went for the 'wake' people offered their condolences and shared memories - which triggered my cousin and I to have a fit of hysterical giggling!
Don't over think it and go with the flow.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TKOrr4XRbg8
black trousers and jacket would be fine.
it's not really necessary to wear black, but usually something dull. not a thong bikini even with a nice sarong.
I guess the problem is because im not a family member i feel like i need to be dressed perfectly. At my nans funeral i knew i could wear anything because nobody would judge me because i was close family.
Nobody is going to be judging you - they'll be too busy concentrating on saying goodbye to their loved one.
i don't know.
at my gran's funeral a woman turned up in jeans. she said sorry about the jeans i didn't have a black skirt. i remember thinking hmmm did you not have literally anything else because it would have been better.
not that i was bothered but i did notice.
Don't wear a red rara skirt with a yellow sequined crop top - specially if you're a man.
This was the specific wish of the sadly departed and her family and was widely publicised before the event so everyone knew about it.
Seriously, it doesn't matter what you wear or what other people think that's the issue here. The point is you're going and that's what matters the most.:)
Perhaps an interview/special work meeting outfit?
I'm sorry but that is not true.
in this instance the only thing that matters is what other people think. those people specifically being the close friends and family of the deceased.
wearing something inappropriate may be considered disrespectful by the immediate family and at this time that is the last thing they need. the point is not that she's going and that is not the main thing.
Yes it is. I'm not suggesting she goes dressed for a night out clubbing but wearing all black is quite frankly out dated and depressing. Close friends and family will have more to think about on the day than what somebody is wearing.
Generally speaking - unless some sort of dress code, as above, is mentioned - just go for something as discreet and reasonably demure as your wardrobe permits.
Your central point. That it doesn't matter what people think is fundamentally wrong. That is the only thing that matters.
It does not speak to the point of whether wearing black is outdated or not.
Oh never mind. I don't understand what you're saying. I'm not sure whether it's because you are not fluent in English?
Really? It's news to me. As for it being "depressing", erm, it's a funeral...
Obviously but funerals can be very upbeat. My uncles was very uplifting because he had planned it himself and didn't want anyone to be depressed. Everyone said afterwards how "lovely" it was to have a funeral that wasn't all religious with people feeling awkward because of it.