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Sell me this pen...

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    BermondseybrickBermondseybrick Posts: 1,256
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    Tell him it's a brand new pen on the market it can write any colour

    When he ask you prove ask him what colour he'll say red purple green whatever's

    Then you write red purple green

    It got me a job anyway
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    Poppy99_PoppyPoppy99_Poppy Posts: 2,255
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    This mobile communication device, which makes no distinction between the left or right handed, is beautifully crafted so thay your script can be applied to the page with either broad or fine strokes. The device does not need recharging, is light and portable and can be customised by adding the ink colour you prefer. The linear shape is ideal for pointing at objects to reinforce a point. No top pocket or handbag can do without it.
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    degsyhufcdegsyhufc Posts: 59,251
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    This mobile communication device, which makes no distinction between the left or right handed, is beautifully crafted so thay your script can be applied to the page with either broad or fine strokes. The device does not need recharging, is light and portable and can be customised by adding the ink colour you prefer. The linear shape is ideal for pointing at objects to reinforce a point. No top pocket or handbag can do without it.
    Depends on the type of pen.

    I'm left handed and have smudge issues with wet ink pens.
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    Poppy99_PoppyPoppy99_Poppy Posts: 2,255
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    Ah, but this has specially been crafted to avoid smudge issues. Try it and see. Money back guarantee.
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    McMahauldMcMahauld Posts: 1,257
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    This penis 9 inches long.
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    [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 2,334
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    Look into my eyes, the eyes, not around the eyes, into the eyes...
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    MargMckMargMck Posts: 24,115
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    "My friend's mum won the £1,200 link jackpot at Gala bingo using this pen - she wanted to pass the luck along (that's how she got the pen in the first place) -so gave it to my mate and his four horse accumulator came up - so he sold it to me for £20 and yesterday I got five numbers in the Thunderball lottery. But you have to promise to pass it on when you win - yours for a bargain £10."
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    [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 32,379
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    I remember on a managment course years ago I had to give a 5 minute talk on a potato.

    Off topic I know:)
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    November_RainNovember_Rain Posts: 9,145
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    I need you to buy this pen, because if you don't my kids will starve and my wife will leave me for another man.
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    [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 32,379
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    MargMck wrote: »
    "My friend's mum won the £1,200 link jackpot at Gala bingo using this pen - she wanted to pass the luck along (that's how she got the pen in the first place) -so gave it to my mate and his four horse accumulator came up - so he sold it to me for £20 and yesterday I got five numbers in the Thunderball lottery. But you have to promise to pass it on when you win - yours for a bargain £10."

    That's good:D
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    lemoncurdlemoncurd Posts: 57,778
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    It has Bluetooth!
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    degsyhufcdegsyhufc Posts: 59,251
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    lemoncurd wrote: »
    It has Bluetooth!
    No, you've just chewed the end too much
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    NX-74205NX-74205 Posts: 4,691
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    woodbush wrote: »
    I remember on a managment course years ago I had to give a 5 minute talk on a potato.

    Off topic I know:)

    I bloody hate those things. The last one we attended had something similar, we had to pick a random topic from a box and then give a 10-minute presentation on it to a room full of people who didn't want to be there and who were mainly thinking about spending the night in the hotel bar.
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    November_RainNovember_Rain Posts: 9,145
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    This metallic Parker pen is excellent for cleaning out dirt from plug sockets.
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    [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 54
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    Hi

    Think your supposed to say things like, it has a lid, so you can keep it in your pocket without it leaking / drying out, or it has a bit on it which allows it to clip it onto your pocket, or if its a highlighter, say it allows you to highlight bits of text and crap like that, and yeah, if its a lid with a hole in, mention the fact if you rammed it down the interviewers throat for asking such a dumb question, it probably wouldn't suffocate him/her unfortunately !!. Oh, and if it has rubber grips / ridges where you hold it you could say this helps you to grip the pen.
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    Phaz0rPhaz0r Posts: 907
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    Makes all your mistakes more permanent than a pencil, and messier too. Here let me sell you this pencil instead. A pen is useful, but only if you already have a pencil, I mean signatures are usually done in pen, and with both you're fit to fill in any kind of form. Just so happens we have a discount on pens! By the way I also have this really nice bridge...
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    lemoncurdlemoncurd Posts: 57,778
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    degsyhufc wrote: »
    No, you've just chewed the end too much

    Très drôle! :D
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    Toby LaRhoneToby LaRhone Posts: 12,916
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    woodbush wrote: »
    I remember on a managment course years ago I had to give a 5 minute talk on a potato.

    Off topic I know:)

    Must have been tricky balancing on that and talking :D

    I got "The digestive system of a camel" but only for two minutes.
    The five minute speakers got prep time.
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    D.DotAD.DotA Posts: 2,281
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    Should have said, 'why would I sell you something you've already brought? Sell me why I should take this job'
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    i4nic8i4nic8 Posts: 255
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    "I'm not going to sell you this pen, I'm going to GIVE you this pen. But after you've used it, you'll be so impressed by it, that you'll want to pay me for it"
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    Si_CreweSi_Crewe Posts: 40,202
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    I'd wait until I saw you using your own pen and then I'd put on a sad face and tell you how unfortunate it is that you're forced to carry on using that pen.

    I'd then tell you that I used to have a pen like yours but I feel much better now I've got this pen, but I don't think I'll be able to get one for you as well.

    Just let me call my pen supplier and I'll see what I can do...

    *EDIT*

    Or, you could repackage the old joke...

    "This pen has a GPS locator built into it which means it's impossible to steal and it's also got an integral beeper and strobe light which means it's easy to locate if you lose it, even in complete darkness or busy areas"

    "That's amazing! Where did you get it?"

    "I found it".
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    nvingonvingo Posts: 8,619
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    How much would you pay for a printer?
    A portable printer?
    Cordless?
    Never needs recharging?
    Doesn't use expensive ink or toner cartridges?
    That much?
    Well for just a fraction of that cost....
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    [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 632
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    I'd start by asking the potential buyer questions about their lifestyle/interests.
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    stoatiestoatie Posts: 78,106
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    "In the basket, or in the eye. Your choice".
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