I tend to, although not usually within the family. Often I do with outsiders, probably to distinguish our upbringings,which were not in the same house. Doesn't mean our love is anything less though.
I'm curious though as to whether others use the term half or just simply sister or brother?
**originaly posted this in chatter but figured it might get a wider audience here,so I ask mods to please delete it there,I couldn't, thanks.
I have a sister, I never describe her as my step sister to anyone, ok just have here. Your half brothers or sisters are family , actualy think it not so nice to say half ths or that they are family as is my sister.:)
I have half siblings on both parental sides, and how I refer to them (and indeed think of them) is entirely dependent on whether we grew up together or not.
My half brother (same mum) who I grew up with is my brother, and I have never thought of him as anything less. In fact I get a little bit annoyed if our half-siblingness is mentioned, as we have always been much closer than so many sets of 'full' siblings that I know.
My half sisters (same dad) who I have never lived with and am not that close to are just half sisters.
My half-sisters are considerably older than me so we weren't brought up together. I therefore refer to them as half-sisters. In fact, I call each of them "Sis" when talking to them and I'm not sure they've ever realised why I shorten it!
Both my parents had children before me - I was raised by Mum and her children are my sisters and brother. I have no relationship with the others so I can't call them anything other than my father's children.
I tend to, although not usually within the family. Often I do with outsiders, probably to distinguish our upbringings,which were not in the same house. Doesn't mean our love is anything less though.
I'm curious though as to whether others use the term half or just simply sister or brother?
**originaly posted this in chatter but figured it might get a wider audience here,so I ask mods to please delete it there,I couldn't, thanks.
I find that pedantic nonsense. It always suggests to me that a person is in some way embarrassed of their half-sibling if they feel the need to point it out to people.
It may come up in conversation that you have a different mother or father - but to introduce them as your half-sibling is sad.
Unless specifically relevant - I would feel insulted in a sibling of mine described me that way. It is so unecessary.
I say sister when speaking in conversation but if somene asks me directly I tend to say half sister. Although we grew up together we have quite large age difference and have struggled to find any common ground.
Hi all,
I know this is probably for the advice forum, but as the thread is running here and most of you are half- siblings - could I ask all of you which is the best way to tell my youngest boy that his older sisters (whom he loves to bits and only knows as his sisters) are from my first marriage (which he doesn't know about)
He's 9 years old, and my daughters are 18 and 15, and they only refer to their brother as their full brother. They are all very close to each other, and my girls were only 4 and 1 when I met my current husband (first one left straight after the second one's birth and hasn't been seen since!) The girls have my husbands name and consider him dad.
Should I let the girls choose to mention it when they feel ready? Leave it (which is stupid!) or tell him when??
Any thoughts would be most welcome!
I see my younger brother and sister who are my mothers children and who I was brought up with the same as I see my older brother who has the same parents as me. I know its bad but I see my dads daughters as half siblings, I don't refer to them as that but its not the same
Hi all,
I know this is probably for the advice forum, but as the thread is running here and most of you are half- siblings - could I ask all of you which is the best way to tell my youngest boy that his older sisters (whom he loves to bits and only knows as his sisters) are from my first marriage (which he doesn't know about)
He's 9 years old, and my daughters are 18 and 15, and they only refer to their brother as their full brother. They are all very close to each other, and my girls were only 4 and 1 when I met my current husband (first one left straight after the second one's birth and hasn't been seen since!) The girls have my husbands name and consider him dad.
Should I let the girls choose to mention it when they feel ready? Leave it (which is stupid!) or tell him when??
Any thoughts would be most welcome!
My parents told me when I was seven, that my elder siblings were my mother's children, not my dad's. They made it sound like it was no big deal, which it wasn't really. My sister and I just accepted it as normal as nothing had changed.
I guess it would defend in which context. I suppose if you're differentiating between one sister and another sister you could say "my sister did this and my half sister said..." but I don't think I'd just say to someone "My half sister says hi btw".
I think it's all about waiting for the right time, I suppose. It's daft, but i feel slightly embarrassed telling him I had a different husband once!
Nice to hear (and reassuring) that most people are saying it didn't make any difference - and I'm certain it won't with my lad, but I'm not sure now's the right time. Maybe in a couple of years
I have a younger half sister but I have never thought of her as anything other than my sister and refer to her as such.
My children's sibling relationships are a little more complicated. My eldest has a younger half sister on her mum's side and two half brothers and a step sister on my side who are all just brothers and sisters to her. My step daughter has a half sister on her dad's side as well as two half brothers on our side whom she shares with my eldest who is her step sister. Again, everyone is just brother and sister.
My half brother is 18 years younger than me. I would hate for him to hear me refer to him as my half brother because I don't want him to ever thing I love him less than my sisters. The only time I call him my half brother is to clarify that we don't have the same Dad if someone needs to know (mostly because my brothers dad is scumb and I have the occasional rant about him and I don't want people to think I'm talking about my Dad who is wonderful)
Well actually Saskia44 I don't regard it as Pedantic in certain contexts. I don't think of them as a half-sibling , don't treat them as such. But sometimes people assume that we grew up together and I kind of feel a loss that we didn't and it's hard to gloss over that in conversation at times. A shared history is assumed when we haven't one and it's hard to invent one,hence the 'half' bit comes up sometimes. Because we didn't share a house or even grow up in the same region,or have any contact actually. Very different to Verbotens situation.
I tend to, although not usually within the family. Often I do with outsiders, probably to distinguish our upbringings,which were not in the same house. Doesn't mean our love is anything less though.
I'm curious though as to whether others use the term half or just simply sister or brother?.
My half sister is my just my sister (dad adopted her) her other half brother and sister aren't referred to as siblings at all. Step brothers are a totally different matter, as we were all basically adults when they met.
I would never refer to my sister as my half-sister within the family, I just look upon her as a sister and nothing 'less', but at times I refer to her as my half-sister when talking about my personal life with people I don't know too well. I don't really know why, possibly because I'm fairly private, so If I tell someone I have a half-sis who lives with my mum and step-dad there's usually no attempt to try and pry any further. I've found that some people like nothing more than to know every little detail about your family life and that, even though you only work together, and not even in remotely the same position!
I tend to, although not usually within the family. Often I do with outsiders, probably to distinguish our upbringings,which were not in the same house. Doesn't mean our love is anything less though.
I'm curious though as to whether others use the term half or just simply sister or brother?
**originaly posted this in chatter but figured it might get a wider audience here,so I ask mods to please delete it there,I couldn't, thanks.
I have a half brother & half sister & I don't refer to them at all, period; I always say I'm an only child. I saw them last about 12 years ago.
I have two half sisters who don't know that I am their brother, although I have met one of them. It was strange. I guess if I were to establish a relationship with them at some point, I would eventually refer to them as my sisters.
I think it's all about waiting for the right time, I suppose. It's daft, but i feel slightly embarrassed telling him I had a different husband once!
Nice to hear (and reassuring) that most people are saying it didn't make any difference - and I'm certain it won't with my lad, but I'm not sure now's the right time. Maybe in a couple of years
I'd tell him now, a 9 year old will probably take it better than a teenager, who may resent you for not telling the truth sooner. I believe you're thinking of yourself rather than your son because you say you'd be embarassed to admit you once had a different husband.
Young children don't over-think things as much as teenagers.
I tend to, although not usually within the family. Often I do with outsiders, probably to distinguish our upbringings,which were not in the same house. Doesn't mean our love is anything less though.
I'm curious though as to whether others use the term half or just simply sister or brother?
**originaly posted this in chatter but figured it might get a wider audience here,so I ask mods to please delete it there,I couldn't, thanks.
I have 4 half sisters, a half brother, a step sister two sons an adopted son an ex-foster son a foster son and a foster daughter. Two sisters-in-laws three brothers-in-law my one of my half sisters has a partner (not married) so I've no idea what discriptive term one uses for him. I only ever use these terms when describing them as far as I am concerned they are (and some I haven't mentioned) FAMILY.
Four older brothers (full) are about ten years older than me, and two younger brothers (half) are about ten years younger than me. I refer all as 'brothers' equally. Both sides, however, refer each other as half-brothers. Not surprising, really, as there are 20 years' difference between them.
We also have two step-sisters (younger brothers' older half-sisters) from the step-mother's first marriage. I refer them as 'cousins' because that's how they address me.
Comments
I have a sister, I never describe her as my step sister to anyone, ok just have here. Your half brothers or sisters are family , actualy think it not so nice to say half ths or that they are family as is my sister.:)
My half brother (same mum) who I grew up with is my brother, and I have never thought of him as anything less. In fact I get a little bit annoyed if our half-siblingness is mentioned, as we have always been much closer than so many sets of 'full' siblings that I know.
My half sisters (same dad) who I have never lived with and am not that close to are just half sisters.
Blood and genetics aren't everything.
I find that pedantic nonsense. It always suggests to me that a person is in some way embarrassed of their half-sibling if they feel the need to point it out to people.
It may come up in conversation that you have a different mother or father - but to introduce them as your half-sibling is sad.
Unless specifically relevant - I would feel insulted in a sibling of mine described me that way. It is so unecessary.
I know this is probably for the advice forum, but as the thread is running here and most of you are half- siblings - could I ask all of you which is the best way to tell my youngest boy that his older sisters (whom he loves to bits and only knows as his sisters) are from my first marriage (which he doesn't know about)
He's 9 years old, and my daughters are 18 and 15, and they only refer to their brother as their full brother. They are all very close to each other, and my girls were only 4 and 1 when I met my current husband (first one left straight after the second one's birth and hasn't been seen since!) The girls have my husbands name and consider him dad.
Should I let the girls choose to mention it when they feel ready? Leave it (which is stupid!) or tell him when??
Any thoughts would be most welcome!
My parents told me when I was seven, that my elder siblings were my mother's children, not my dad's. They made it sound like it was no big deal, which it wasn't really. My sister and I just accepted it as normal as nothing had changed.
(Not that I have any half siblings)
Nice to hear (and reassuring) that most people are saying it didn't make any difference - and I'm certain it won't with my lad, but I'm not sure now's the right time. Maybe in a couple of years
My children's sibling relationships are a little more complicated. My eldest has a younger half sister on her mum's side and two half brothers and a step sister on my side who are all just brothers and sisters to her. My step daughter has a half sister on her dad's side as well as two half brothers on our side whom she shares with my eldest who is her step sister. Again, everyone is just brother and sister.
I have a half brother & half sister & I don't refer to them at all, period; I always say I'm an only child. I saw them last about 12 years ago.
I'd tell him now, a 9 year old will probably take it better than a teenager, who may resent you for not telling the truth sooner. I believe you're thinking of yourself rather than your son because you say you'd be embarassed to admit you once had a different husband.
Young children don't over-think things as much as teenagers.
I have 4 half sisters, a half brother, a step sister two sons an adopted son an ex-foster son a foster son and a foster daughter. Two sisters-in-laws three brothers-in-law my one of my half sisters has a partner (not married) so I've no idea what discriptive term one uses for him. I only ever use these terms when describing them as far as I am concerned they are (and some I haven't mentioned) FAMILY.
We also have two step-sisters (younger brothers' older half-sisters) from the step-mother's first marriage. I refer them as 'cousins' because that's how they address me.