No, I've thought about it and I really did mean what I said in the text- I want him, I don't care if I never have kids.
I know I was daft and that most men wouldn't refuse when it's offered to them on a plate. He really is not like that though. I'm not naive. He only held hands with his fiancee before he married her (because of the religion thing). He really isn't a womanizer.
You don't have to be a womaniser to be inconsiderate or selfish. He's got two failed marriages behind him, & I'd be surprised if the other women were the only ones at fault for that.
I think you need to take a long hard look at what you are doing here, as it is really easy to be blinded when we think ourselves in love with someone. People have given you a lot of very good advice on here, many of us have been in the same situation ! BUT you do seem to refuse to even consider that this man might be stringing you along, and really are clutching at straws.
If you intend to still go along with whatever this man wants, and then regularly being let down by him, this is fine. However, I would question whether you should keep asking for advice/opinions if you really don't want to hear or acknowledge the answers people are giving you.
It's behaviour such as yours that affects other people. Why are you going out on a date with this guy if your interest lays elsewhere?
You are wasting HIS time and yours.
From what I can see from your behaviour, you would quite happily lead this other guy up the garden path, just to feed your own ego. He then gets hurt and PROBABLY takes out his frustration on the next poor unsuspecting female, who has the misfortune of meeting a bloke who YOU have screwed up.
Then again he could just be like your ex - and is just looking for a quick roll in the hay - and you seem to fit the bill perfectly for that.
Whatever it is you are looking for, you are not going to find it in your ex.
You more than likely will not find it in this new guy either, because you don't have any respect for yourself whatsoever.
People will treat you the way YOU ALLOW them to treat you.
Bathsheba, I have done what you have done so many times - unfortunately someone unavailable to me, and very unsuitable is the one man I really want and am always drawn back to - and have been for 7 years!
My advice is to throw yourself into meeting other men and hope that you meet someone with a stronger appeal to you. Good luck!
It's behaviour such as yours that affects other people. Why are you going out on a date with this guy if your interest lays elsewhere?
You are wasting HIS time and yours.
From what I can see from your behaviour, you would quite happily lead this other guy up the garden path, just to feed your own ego. He then gets hurt and PROBABLY takes out his frustration on the next poor unsuspecting female, who has the misfortune of meeting a bloke who YOU have screwed up.
No, he knew the situation because I told him. I never lead people on. He was very nice and we could be friends but I wasn't attracted to him and I explained about the ex when he asked me. When I meet someone for a date there are no promises, as far as I'm concerned we might just be friends (WITHOUT benefits) and I was clear about that with him and he was of the same opinion.
That's fair enough Bathsheba - at least you had a nice time - have you heard from your ex since the other night?
Well, I sent him a text last night quite late after I'd got home from the other date. I was just querying one of his texts from the other night because he described himself as an 'armadillo'. And I was re-reading the texts and I was like WTF does that mean? Anyway he emailed me this morning and he didn't remember texting that. He is such an enigma to me. Maybe he thinks he needs 'armour' and to defend himself from me, I don't know?
No, he knew the situation because I told him. I never lead people on. He was very nice and we could be friends but I wasn't attracted to him and I explained about the ex when he asked me. When I meet someone for a date there are no promises, as far as I'm concerned we might just be friends (WITHOUT benefits) and I was clear about that with him and he was of the same opinion.
OMG, even though I was clear with the other bloke about the whole situation now he wants to see me again! He wants to watch DVDs either at my house or his with alcohol (in other words, he wants some sex probably). But I didn't encourage him at all. I didn't kiss him or even hug him. We just went out as friends. I just don't know what to say to him. I'm not after a fling with anyone at the moment.
OMG, even though I was clear with the other bloke about the whole situation now he wants to see me again! He wants to watch DVDs either at my house or his with alcohol (in other words, he wants some sex probably). But I didn't encourage him at all. I didn't kiss him or even hug him. We just went out as friends. I just don't know what to say to him. I'm not after a fling with anyone at the moment.
OMG, even though I was clear with the other bloke about the whole situation now he wants to see me again! He wants to watch DVDs either at my house or his with alcohol (in other words, he wants some sex probably). But I didn't encourage him at all. I didn't kiss him or even hug him. We just went out as friends. I just don't know what to say to him. I'm not after a fling with anyone at the moment.
Are you sure you are a 30 something year old woman? :eek:
If you don't want to see this other guy again then politely refuse his offer of DVD's and booze!! Simple.
Well, I sent him a text last night quite late after I'd got home from the other date. I was just querying one of his texts from the other night because he described himself as an 'armadillo'. And I was re-reading the texts and I was like WTF does that mean? Anyway he emailed me this morning and he didn't remember texting that. He is such an enigma to me. Maybe he thinks he needs 'armour' and to defend himself from me, I don't know?
Nah you're just looking for reasons to contact him etc and reading in to things that aren't there. He's an enigma to you because he doesn't want to reveal anything of himself as it appears he's just not that in to you - I'd say cease all contact and delete his number but you're too crazy about him - I just hope he doesn't let you drag it all out for the next couple of years
I am going on a date with a girl this week who is probly more experinced than me , I am not a virgin but i pefer the hugging and kissing at first, suppose i will have to go with the flow or she might think theres something up with me:o
I am going on a date with a girl this week who is probly more experinced than me , I am not a virgin but i pefer the hugging and kissing at first, suppose i will have to go with the flow or she might think theres something up with me:o
Course you don't Rick - and just because she may be more experienced doesn't mean she'll want to jump your bones immediately!
Comments
Fair enough, but be present in mind as well as in body.
If you intend to still go along with whatever this man wants, and then regularly being let down by him, this is fine. However, I would question whether you should keep asking for advice/opinions if you really don't want to hear or acknowledge the answers people are giving you.
I hope it works out but it just comes across as though you have rose tinted specs on - let us know how tonight goes though
It's behaviour such as yours that affects other people. Why are you going out on a date with this guy if your interest lays elsewhere?
You are wasting HIS time and yours.
From what I can see from your behaviour, you would quite happily lead this other guy up the garden path, just to feed your own ego. He then gets hurt and PROBABLY takes out his frustration on the next poor unsuspecting female, who has the misfortune of meeting a bloke who YOU have screwed up.
Then again he could just be like your ex - and is just looking for a quick roll in the hay - and you seem to fit the bill perfectly for that.
Whatever it is you are looking for, you are not going to find it in your ex.
You more than likely will not find it in this new guy either, because you don't have any respect for yourself whatsoever.
People will treat you the way YOU ALLOW them to treat you.
My advice is to throw yourself into meeting other men and hope that you meet someone with a stronger appeal to you. Good luck!
You wanton woman :P
Tee hee
According to whom?
Anyway, I've said it all before and now everyone seems to be saying it, so what they all said... ^^^^
No, he knew the situation because I told him. I never lead people on. He was very nice and we could be friends but I wasn't attracted to him and I explained about the ex when he asked me. When I meet someone for a date there are no promises, as far as I'm concerned we might just be friends (WITHOUT benefits) and I was clear about that with him and he was of the same opinion.
Well, I sent him a text last night quite late after I'd got home from the other date. I was just querying one of his texts from the other night because he described himself as an 'armadillo'. And I was re-reading the texts and I was like WTF does that mean? Anyway he emailed me this morning and he didn't remember texting that. He is such an enigma to me. Maybe he thinks he needs 'armour' and to defend himself from me, I don't know?
Seconded.
Thirded
OMG, even though I was clear with the other bloke about the whole situation now he wants to see me again! He wants to watch DVDs either at my house or his with alcohol (in other words, he wants some sex probably). But I didn't encourage him at all. I didn't kiss him or even hug him. We just went out as friends. I just don't know what to say to him. I'm not after a fling with anyone at the moment.
Say 'no' then (to both of them!)
Are you sure you are a 30 something year old woman? :eek:
If you don't want to see this other guy again then politely refuse his offer of DVD's and booze!! Simple.
Nah you're just looking for reasons to contact him etc and reading in to things that aren't there. He's an enigma to you because he doesn't want to reveal anything of himself as it appears he's just not that in to you - I'd say cease all contact and delete his number but you're too crazy about him - I just hope he doesn't let you drag it all out for the next couple of years
Course you don't Rick - and just because she may be more experienced doesn't mean she'll want to jump your bones immediately!
You take it at your own pace