Things that sound better than they actually are.
Picto
Posts: 24,270 Forum Member
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Have you ever yearned to visit somewhere / try something out because the idea of it sounded amazing only to be severely disappointed when you fulfill your wish.
If so could you add your shattered dreams to my list.
Shower sex - It sounds sensual and erotic having various plus points such as any spillages are washed away and you could wash your hair at the same time. However, in reality it's awkward and sometimes downright dangerous. You could drown yourself under that shower head and maybe get a slip concussion if you try out too adventurous positions.
The Monaco Grand Prix - It’s regarded as the epitome of glamour and excitement but in reality it's the most tedious F1 race out there. The difficulty in overtaking makes it little more than a street procession of noisy cars.
3D cinema - How exciting it would be sat there with things coming out into your face (remind me never to watch 3D porn). Essentially though, I am paying the cinema to mess up my eyes and give me a thumping headache. I don't think my optic nerves are set up to receive cinema 3D.
Thongs - They look really sexy on the catalogue models but in reality they are really uncomfortable and unflattering. I may have been wearing it backwards though.
This Thread - (Recently added edit).
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If so could you add your shattered dreams to my list.
Shower sex - It sounds sensual and erotic having various plus points such as any spillages are washed away and you could wash your hair at the same time. However, in reality it's awkward and sometimes downright dangerous. You could drown yourself under that shower head and maybe get a slip concussion if you try out too adventurous positions.
The Monaco Grand Prix - It’s regarded as the epitome of glamour and excitement but in reality it's the most tedious F1 race out there. The difficulty in overtaking makes it little more than a street procession of noisy cars.
3D cinema - How exciting it would be sat there with things coming out into your face (remind me never to watch 3D porn). Essentially though, I am paying the cinema to mess up my eyes and give me a thumping headache. I don't think my optic nerves are set up to receive cinema 3D.
Thongs - They look really sexy on the catalogue models but in reality they are really uncomfortable and unflattering. I may have been wearing it backwards though.
This Thread - (Recently added edit).
Any more?
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Farmer's markets. I like the idea, I really do, but I wouldn't actually pay triple just to get vegetables with soil on.
Robert Plant and Alison Krauss. Charmingly un-showbiz pairing - rootsy, authentic, honest, genuine, unflashy. Now just play Gallows Pole...
Lastminute.com special reductions. Normal price: £200 per night. Special offer price: £80 per night. Reality: a room along the lines of any other £80 per night hotel. Don't expect a bottle of champagne on ice when you arrive.
Final Solution
Honour Killing
Regarding the farmers market, I would like to include the visiting continental markets into that category. They sound so exotic, they smell divine, but ultimately i'm paying £6 for a mild case of food poisoning on a stick.
I totally agree. My sister had one and following half an hour of arm numbing churning we got a quarter of a paper cup of coloured ice that tasted of ICE.
Generalising a bit (and only my experience) :-
Sex
Formula 1
Moving pictures
Clothes
The internet
Chicken Madras is a bugger to clean out of your crevises.
Bad image alert
As a 13 year old I was expecting it to be a magical experience; in reality we spent the vast majority of the day queuing to get on a total of 5 rides. Didn't seem much better than Alton Towers.
Clay Pigeon Shooting
What can be more fun then firing shotguns at things? Quite a lot when you realize the guns are glorified bb rifles, you're supervised at every step and you'll spend less than 10 minutes actually shooting.
Interesting that you list the Monaco GP and shower sex. Neither are as much fun if you're not actually there!
Does watching both on TV not count?
Las Vegas
Oysters
But less painful than Chicken Phal.
I assume not the great man himself ?
Vegas /raw Oysters - love em both in huge quantities - and even at the same time ;-)
Car sex - very much depends on the car as to how the experience will be.
Edible body paints particularly chocolate - tastes like the Easter egg you find out the back of the cupboard at Christmas
It's so bad that I can only think of sexual ones at the moment 😳
You assume correctly.
I was referring to the pretentious Scots Talking Heads wannabes.
It is absolutely impossible to have sex on a beach ( even on a big, big blanket) without sand getting into your important little places. As for the sea, that's worse, absolutely full of sand that gets into the works. Its like using a sandpaper condom. Ouch! Never again.
Yes my ex and I tried food sex, choc sauce, yogurt and various things but it just made me sticky and hungry.
Its ok, but not as great as some people make it sound.
It's bloody awful if you're a seal.