What attitude? I was just saying, I feel I have the resources to get a job I enjoy etc.
I hope you do as well, but having the resources is only 1 part of a bigger problem. And I bet everyone of these people thought the same
40% of recent graduates unemployed?
A survey by totaljobs.com, reported by several newspapers, claimed that 40% of graduates were still looking for work six months after graduating. Enjoy your life now because it only gets harder, being at school and at home is the easy part of life.
I disagree with the posts about "growing up too fast" etc. I couldn't wait to be independent. I wished my school life away as I wanted to be an adult - I wanted responsibilities. I wanted to wash my own clothes, cook for myself, be able to drive, have a job, go on holiday wherever and whenever I wanted, have my own place...
I don't really understand how the above stops you from enjoying life; to stop relying on mummy and daddy doesn't suddenly mean life ends. For me, it began.
The only problem I have is that I don't have a career. I still don't know what I'd like to do (probably too late now, even if I did find something I enjoy), so I don't like working, but I like the freedom that comes with working so I'm pretty indifferent about it. I guess that's the problem - if I hated my job that much I would give myself a kick up the backside and have a serious think about what I want, but the whole career/work thing has never appealed to me. As long as I'm getting paid at the end of the day for it, then I'm pretty happy to do whatever the job is, as it allows me to go and do what I enjoy and want to do with my life.
I also think people are just picking on your "call centre" comment for the sake of it. It's not like you've come out and said they're all scum. Not wanting to work in a call centre is fine - good for you. I see no reason not to express that opinion, besides, you were merely making a point, rather than disrespecting those who work in one. Some may not see a problem working in them, others would hope never to go near such a place. It doesn't mean you think anything less of anyone working there, it just isn't a job that appeals to you - nothing wrong with that.
Lets end this one now. They arr not really interrsted in an opinion that differs from theirs. For the last time ENJOY YOUR LACK OF RESPONSIBILITY WHILE YOU CAN. Life ain't like The Apprentice.
I hope you don't feel too discouraged. Please make a note to update us in 25 years time. I (we) be very interested in finding out your considered views on this, and where you ended u. Call Centre on Mars anyone?
Oh for goodness' sake, you have gotten the wrong end of the stick. I've apologigized for the way I came across, but I feel you've taken this personally, and are being a bit silly.
And also, why do you think im not interested in anyones opinion? If that were the case why would I have started a thread asking for opinins?
Thanks . Apologies, maybe I did sound a bit like I was on a high horse.
Yes you did. You've got a lot to learn. You sound very naive. You may be academically smart, but that will only get you so far, you need to be emotionally astute aswell. I suggest you work on that.
I disagree with the posts about "growing up too fast" etc. I couldn't wait to be independent. I wished my school life away as I wanted to be an adult - I wanted responsibilities. I wanted to wash my own clothes, cook for myself, be able to drive, have a job, go on holiday wherever and whenever I wanted, have my own place...
I don't really understand how the above stops you from enjoying life; to stop relying on mummy and daddy doesn't suddenly mean life ends. For me, it began.
The only problem I have is that I don't have a career. I still don't know what I'd like to do (probably too late now, even if I did find something I enjoy), so I don't like working, but I like the freedom that comes with working so I'm pretty indifferent about it. I guess that's the problem - if I hated my job that much I would give myself a kick up the backside and have a serious think about what I want, but the whole career/work thing has never appealed to me. As long as I'm getting paid at the end of the day for it, then I'm pretty happy to do whatever the job is, as it allows me to go and do what I enjoy and want to do with my life.
I also think people are just picking on your "call centre" comment for the sake of it. It's not like you've come out and said they're all scum. Not wanting to work in a call centre is fine - good for you. I see no reason not to express that opinion, besides, you were merely making a point, rather than disrespecting those who work in one. Some may not see a problem working in them, others would hope never to go near such a place. It doesn't mean you think anything less of anyone working there, it just isn't a job that appeals to you - nothing wrong with that.
If you can't see that saying ' I won't be working in a call centre' is using that as an example of a low paid low skilled job that the OP would feel beneath his/her talents then I think you are missing something.
I've put this down to the general arrogance of youth. It's an attitude I recognise from my own kids. As they got older they learned a bit of humility. It was a maturity thing rather than being inherently snobbish. I encouraged them to see themselves as very fortunate to have the chance to use their talents in a job that excited them.
Oh for goodness' sake, you have gotten the wrong end of the stick. I've apologigized for the way I came across, but I feel you've taken this personally, and are being a bit silly.
And also, why do you think im not interested in anyones opinion? If that were the case why would I have started a thread asking for opinins?
Nope, I think that it's you that was being silly. But as you're young, we'll put it down to your lack of interaction with anyone other than academics.
Oh for goodness' sake, you have gotten the wrong end of the stick. I've apologigized for the way I came across, but I feel you've taken this personally, and are being a bit silly.
And also, why do you think im not interested in anyones opinion? If that were the case why would I have started a thread asking for opinins?[/QUOTE]
What responsibilities do you have at the moment, who feeds you, what accommodation do you own, can you keep warm. Can you find employment to furnish these needs
I think you need to grow up life is very very hard and your not special to others, your spelling is not that good, nevertheless I wish I was again 15 that was over 45 years ago
Yeah, and that's the exact same situation I'm in now at one of the most intensive schools in the country, but it doesn't faze me, or any of us, we just all get on with it. Some things, subjects etc, we don't even like, but we get on with it. I have a good idea of what ill enjoy working as when I grow up and so I think ill have more motivation to work as an adult than I do now.
I went to a very competitive school as well, and a hugely competitive university. Both were still less responsibility than working life.
I notice you selectively quoted my post. The rest of it is equally as relevant, and in real life you can't choose to ignore things like finances. What you'll enjoy working on is irrelevant, as at the end of the day you'll have to pay the bills, and that might just mean doing a job you hate because you can't get anything else in a difficult job market, no matter how entitled you think you are.
Hearing things like this just motivate me to get a job I do enjoy. Luckily at my school we are encouraged to look at careers early, so now o have a list of potential career paths. I won't be working in a call centre.
Hate to break it to you, but just because you think you're suitable for or entitled to a particular job or level of job doesn't mean you're going to get it, and the sooner you take off the rose-tinted spectacles, the better.
And the superior attitude isn't going to get you anywhere except on the path to a whole pile of rejection letters. From the way you're coming across, I think you'd need to learn a bit more humility and respect for others' jobs before you even think about the world of work. You're no more entitled than anyone else, and neither am I.
What attitude? I was just saying, I feel I have the resources to get a job I enjoy etc.
Resources are irrelevant if there aren't the jobs to be had. In a difficult economic climate you have to take whatever job you can get, if you can get one at all. There are plenty of talented people who are unemployed through no choice of their own, so I think you're being a little too naïve in thinking you'll just waltz into a high-level job because of the school you went to and your skills. But times have changed, and often nowadays that's simply not enough.
You've got the arrogance of youth and there's no need to apologise for it, whether we admit it or not we all had it at sometime in our lives, you've learned at least one lesson tonight, some people on here will jump on you for the least thing or word you type.
I see it as you've got a great belief in yourself at a young age and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that.
I've no doubt that as the years pass and you gain more experience of the world some of your opinions will change, at the moment enjoy your youth and your ambitions, avoid all the negative comments they're really not worth your time.
Chase your dreams and aspirations, learn above all else that there are some people who will gladly try to bring you down.
Enjoy being excited by life. You're 15 and you should be. One day you'll learn humility, be jaded, and feel tired, but for now you want to get out on your own and that's great, good luck to you. Work hard while you have the energy! Every qualification counts.
In spite of the numerous posts in this thread wishing their adulthood away, it's pretty shit to be 15 - you can't go to pubs, you can't go to clubs, you can't drive, you have to be home by 11, you have to go to school, you're at least ten years away from the excitement of real love, and you can't have sex. So it's quite normal to want to grow up, and no-one in their right mind really wants to go back to being 15 (25, maybe).
Do remember the following:
1. It's easier not to start smoking than it is to stop.
2. If you allow your teeth to go rotten, it will cost thousands to put them right.
3. Wearing suncreen prevents wrinkles.
4. The only person you will ever know who always acts unconditionally in your best interests, even if it doesn't always feel like it, is your mother; and someday she will be gone.
5. Your life belongs to you, and only you have the power to make it how you want it.
In spite of the numerous posts in this thread wishing their adulthood away, it's pretty shit to be 15 - you can't go to pubs, you can't go to clubs, you can't drive, you have to be home by 11, you have to go to school, you're at least ten years away from the excitement of real love, and you can't have sex. So it's quite normal to want to grow up, and no-one in their right mind really wants to go back to being 15 (25, maybe).
Do remember the following:
1. It's easier not to start smoking than it is to stop.
2. If you allow your teeth to go rotten, it will cost thousands to put them right.
3. Wearing suncreen prevents wrinkles.
4. The only person you will ever know who always acts unconditionally in your best interests, even if it doesn't always feel like it, is your mother; and someday she will be gone.
5. Your life belongs to you, and only you have the power to make it how you want it.
Sound advice, but unfortunately, point 4 simply is all too often a mere saccharin-sweet fairytale for many.
There's no harm in feeling what you feel, OP, but you're going to have to gain some 'people skills' pretty quickly, or it will all turn sour, and no quantity of resources can put that right.
This op seems to have the entitled attitude of far too many UK young people who have the misguided impression that certain perfectly "respectable" jobs are beneath them. In the Indian subcontinent these call centre jobs are graduate level and highly prized. You're in a warm office, stay clean and tidy and go home every day not physically worn out. Immigrants to this country are fortunately willing to do this and other much more physically gruelling work which some of our homegrown young people deem beneath them. All work should be valued and respected. Can't stop, off to work ( means to an end ).
This isn't really me asking for advice, more opinions.
Did anyone else feel like me, a fifteen year old when they were my age, not being able to wait to grow up!
I just can't wait to be independent. There's something really appealing to me about having my own flat/house, making my own money, getting a good job, being where I want to be, and just being able to be my own person, make my own decisions, rule my won life and how I choose to live it!
I really crave success right now - I can't wait to do something I feel motivated about - surely you feel more motivated about your job, than your school years, becuase firstly, you're earning money, and most of the time, you're doing something you enjoy! Being a success when I grow up is important to me - I have a rough idea of what career area I'd like to be in, and I would LOVE some day to start a business, and really show what I can do! I just hope that my life turns out so that this is possible!
So, yeah did anyone feel really anxious to grow up when they were my age?
I think yours is an interesting post and my feeling is that you may well do better than many. If you can feel as you do in the current climate, then I am sure it will be suited to you. You must, though, try to work out in your mind how each situation is likely to feel, consider the right balance between working life and social life, and crucially recognise what you will need to do in each decade because of your age and the ages of those in your family. Much of it may seem a long way off and it does sound like a boring chore. But do ask yourself when will you be able to have children if you want them, what age you will be when they will need adult financial support and what demands ultimately there might be on you in middle age from your parents. You also need to develop awareness about the character and extent of your capabilities. All these things will minimise stress and disappointments.
As a child, I looked younger than my age but I was seen as bright. I spoke and behaved in a positive way but was perceived as unusually parental. Teachers would get me to share the teaching duties with them or put me in charge of the class in their temporary absence. This sounds like a recipe for weirdo like unpopularity but actually I was very popular with adults and children alike. Kids experiencing problems would ask me for advice. Parents who had problems and couldn't manage their unruly children sent them in my direction. My non shouty welcoming manner would of itself make them happy and contented. I also did my bit in a predominantly white school for race relations.
What I and others didn't appreciate was that I was the least suited of all of them for the new adult world. When I passed the eleven plus with flying colours, some others' parents treated it as if it were like landing on the moon while others exhibited jealousy. It was the first time that I felt adults could be bizarre and rather immature. While I mildly shrugged all of it off, it was sadly typical. On arriving at an achievers' school full of people who were far more wealthy than me, it wasn't at all as I and others expected. I wasn't at all ready for their ability, the squabbling between each other, their criticism of teachers, their condemning attitude of the less wealthy and most of all the competition. I also missed my friends and being on familiar turf even though I was a day pupil, while pretending everything was ok. Within months, I went from being the local superstar into a dysfunctional individual who was placed on anti-depressants for a month or two at aged 12, 1 month. That didn't happen again until the age of 32.
The remainder of my seven years there were focussed on not being the one with the lowest test results. Ultimately I got good enough O'levels and A'levels and couldn't comprehend how several of the most arrogant and apparently intelligent people dropped out or did less well. Having been an open person until 11, I could hardly say a word to anyone for the entire time I was there and found eye contact difficult. When I left at 18, it felt like I was breathing for the first time in seven years. What it left me with was a feeling that I had been too middle aged to be a teenager and yet too young to be a teenager too. Going first into employment and then forcing myself to go to university, I didn't believe I would survive the experience, let alone flourish. At 20, I felt that I couldn't really be 20 but rather somehow had to try to be the missing 16 year old with other 20 year olds when still feeling I was also about 12.
What strikes me now is the extent of my naivety. I was willing to sacrifice ever getting a degree in order to prove to myself that I could feel acclimatised in the young adult world. I made many friends who liked my personality as I self-deprecatingly dumbed down. I had an extremely active social life which was full of light humour and camaraderie which I would never have believed was ever possible. But they always had to bang on my door and pull me out as I found it so difficult to anticipate being in social situations that I even avoided streets in daylight.
There was a sense of shelter in that group which was the closest that I could find to my only child status when being with other people of a similar age. Yes, they took the mick but it wasn't all aimed at me and there were common interests although I always felt very defensive. I liked the fact that we went to places that were often frequented by much older people. They felt more comforting. In contrast, the average student group seemed showy and almost threatening. As it happened, I got a good degree and I guess at 22 I felt that my more troubled past was behind me. But I didn't have a clue about the workplace. I was entirely unprepared for office politics, people seeing what they could get away with, those privately networking to get promotion and the instinct to make money. I had no interest in making money whatsoever. It seemed almost irrelevant and pretty crazily I probably even said so.
There was competitiveness. It emerged in places where it didn't matter to actual life like in table tennis matches at lunchtime which were always both serious and funny. But from the word go, I felt sickened by what I saw as the failings of successful managers - their remoteness, pomposity, unwillingness to praise anyone and obvious self-promotion. I tried so hard to get on with them but there was an absence of chemistry. I would have been better off being self-employed. Mostly I was seen by the few who worked to me as inexplicably encouraging of them and rewarding while my managers saw me as a soft touch. Sometimes when throwing myself into the social life linked to the office I clumsily became embroiled in minor scrapes. These could occur at times of acute anxiety, for example during my parents' illness. This not only soured the relationship with bosses but hurt me badly as I was the one who went out of his way generally to do everything exactly by the book. It wasn't at all my sort of norm.
Ultimately I went to work in London, briefed Government Ministers, attended committees in the UN, was a regular at football matches, enjoyed hundreds of gigs in places like Brixton and went to the Glastonbury Festival ten times. I started buying my own flat at 29 and I had driven a car since 18. But I never had a day in work when I didn't wake up and think it was impossible to face the world. Every morning was accompanied by clawing onto the bed and feeling reluctant to leave that womb. Every serious transaction with people in the office would be accompanied by anxiety although in light social chat I felt fine. My first breakdown was at 32 and ostensibly triggered by noisy neighbours but it went much deeper. There were then years that followed which were comparatively problem free and years of short-term psychological illness. Generally we all referred to them as blips. The stiff upper lip.
The personal CV might best be described as colourfully varied. Not many could name drop face to face assistance to many famous politicians as I can do - for example you will have heard of Glenda Jackson and perhaps even Francis Maude - and be able to say that while in 25 years the reports were mainly good because of hard work and ability, and yet they never got promotion. Obviously that has had financial repercussions. Similarly, few would claim that they first had a brief personal relationship at 19 and then not another one until the age of 42 while in parallel there were dozens of close long-term friends who were, well, just friends. Very, very, good friends but friends.
There were actually two relationships at 42 and 43. Both lasted just a matter of a few months. It was all too late really. My parents were getting older. They could need care - or was it that I would need care when they virtually departed as it would be like losing the parental part of me? Just before my unexpected redundancy at 48, I was feeling that everything I had fought was coming back to attack me. Life for everyone was more competitive. People were operating in a cut-throat way. One slight blunder and they would seize on it for all it was worth. In short, everywhere had become more dangerous. Too dangerous to cope with. Three years on, I've never been back to London and can barely travel a few miles alone. But one thing you should know is that the brightest people are also the least capable and the thickest in many respects. That is just concealed - or exhibited - in a variety of ways.
Hearing things like this just motivate me to get a job I do enjoy. Luckily at my school we are encouraged to look at careers early, so now o have a list of potential career paths. I won't be working in a call centre.
I’ll let you in on a secret; “there’s no such thing as a ‘career path’ really..... it’s just crazy-paving that you have to lay yourself”. ;-)
In spite of the numerous posts in this thread wishing their adulthood away, it's pretty shit to be 15 - you can't go to pubs, you can't go to clubs, you can't drive, you have to be home by 11, you have to go to school, you're at least ten years away from the excitement of real love, and you can't have sex. So it's quite normal to want to grow up, and no-one in their right mind really wants to go back to being 15 (25, maybe).
Do remember the following:
1. It's easier not to start smoking than it is to stop.
2. If you allow your teeth to go rotten, it will cost thousands to put them right.
3. Wearing suncreen prevents wrinkles.
4. The only person you will ever know who always acts unconditionally in your best interests, even if it doesn't always feel like it, is your mother; and someday she will be gone.
5. Your life belongs to you, and only you have the power to make it how you want it.
Just to add, a friend of mine ended up working in a call centre and worked his way up and is now on an obscene amount of money in a managerial role at that same call centre he started at and enjoys it and the plenty of money that goes with it. It's not necessarily the low paid, low skilled job people think it is.
As for being 15 and wanting to be independent as soon as possible, don't fret too much about it, it won't be long until you are experiencing independence at uni. I could say that you shouldn't wish your life away but I remember feeling like you at your age. I'm sure your intelligent enough to know that there will be struggles along the way and adult life might not work out exactly as is planned but hard work should see you fine.
I think yours is an interesting post and my feeling is that you may well do better than many. If you can feel as you do in the current climate, then I am sure it will be suited to you. You must, though, try to work out in your mind how each situation is likely to feel, consider the right balance between working life and social life, and crucially recognise what you will need to do in each decade because of your age and the ages of those in your family. Much of it may seem a long way off and it does sound like a boring chore. But do ask yourself when will you be able to have children if you want them, what age you will be when they will need adult financial support and what demands ultimately there might be on you in middle age from your parents. You also need to develop awareness about the character and extent of your capabilities. All these things will minimise stress and disappointments.
As a child, I looked younger than my age but I was seen as bright. I spoke and behaved in a positive way but was perceived as unusually parental. Teachers would get me to share the teaching duties with them or put me in charge of the class in their temporary absence. This sounds like a recipe for weirdo like unpopularity but actually I was very popular with adults and children alike. Kids experiencing problems would ask me for advice. Parents who had problems and couldn't manage their unruly children sent them in my direction. My non shouty welcoming manner would of itself make them happy and contented. I also did my bit in a predominantly white school for race relations.
What I and others didn't appreciate was that I was the least suited of all of them for the new adult world. When I passed the eleven plus with flying colours, some others' parents treated it as if it were like landing on the moon while others exhibited jealousy. It was the first time that I felt adults could be bizarre and rather immature. While I mildly shrugged all of it off, it was sadly typical. On arriving at an achievers' school full of people who were far more wealthy than me, it wasn't at all as I and others expected. I wasn't at all ready for their ability, the squabbling between each other, their criticism of teachers, their condemning attitude of the less wealthy and most of all the competition. I also missed my friends and being on familiar turf even though I was a day pupil, while pretending everything was ok. Within months, I went from being the local superstar into a dysfunctional individual who was placed on anti-depressants for a month or two at aged 12, 1 month. That didn't happen again until the age of 32.
The remainder of my seven years there were focussed on not being the one with the lowest test results. Ultimately I got good enough O'levels and A'levels and couldn't comprehend how several of the most arrogant and apparently intelligent people dropped out or did less well. Having been an open person until 11, I could hardly say a word to anyone for the entire time I was there and found eye contact difficult. When I left at 18, it felt like I was breathing for the first time in seven years. What it left me with was a feeling that I had been too middle aged to be a teenager and yet too young to be a teenager too. Going first into employment and then forcing myself to go to university, I didn't believe I would survive the experience, let alone flourish. At 20, I felt that I couldn't really be 20 but rather somehow had to try to be the missing 16 year old with other 20 year olds when still feeling I was also about 12.
What strikes me now is the extent of my naivety. I was willing to sacrifice ever getting a degree in order to prove to myself that I could feel acclimatised in the young adult world. I made many friends who liked my personality as I self-deprecatingly dumbed down. I had an extremely active social life which was full of light humour and camaraderie which I would never have believed was ever possible. But they always had to bang on my door and pull me out as I found it so difficult to anticipate being in social situations that I even avoided streets in daylight.
There was a sense of shelter in that group which was the closest that I could find to my only child status when being with other people of a similar age. Yes, they took the mick but it wasn't all aimed at me and there were common interests although I always felt very defensive. I liked the fact that we went to places that were often frequented by much older people. They felt more comforting. In contrast, the average student group seemed showy and almost threatening. As it happened, I got a good degree and I guess at 22 I felt that my more troubled past was behind me. But I didn't have a clue about the workplace. I was entirely unprepared for office politics, people seeing what they could get away with, those privately networking to get promotion and the instinct to make money. I had no interest in making money whatsoever. It seemed almost irrelevant and pretty crazily I probably even said so.
There was competitiveness. It emerged in places where it didn't matter to actual life like in table tennis matches at lunchtime which were always both serious and funny. But from the word go, I felt sickened by what I saw as the failings of successful managers - their remoteness, pomposity, unwillingness to praise anyone and obvious self-promotion. I tried so hard to get on with them but there was an absence of chemistry. I would have been better off being self-employed. Mostly I was seen by the few who worked to me as inexplicably encouraging of them and rewarding while my managers saw me as a soft touch. Sometimes when throwing myself into the social life linked to the office I clumsily became embroiled in minor scrapes. These could occur at times of acute anxiety, for example during my parents' illness. This not only soured the relationship with bosses but hurt me badly as I was the one who went out of his way generally to do everything exactly by the book. It wasn't at all my sort of norm.
Ultimately I went to work in London, briefed Government Ministers, attended committees in the UN, was a regular at football matches, enjoyed hundreds of gigs in places like Brixton and went to the Glastonbury Festival ten times. I started buying my own flat at 29 and I had driven a car since 18. But I never had a day in work when I didn't wake up and think it was impossible to face the world. Every morning was accompanied by clawing onto the bed and feeling reluctant to leave that womb. Every serious transaction with people in the office would be accompanied by anxiety although in light social chat I felt fine. My first breakdown was at 32 and ostensibly triggered by noisy neighbours but it went much deeper. There were then years that followed which were comparatively problem free and years of short-term psychological illness. Generally we all referred to them as blips. The stiff upper lip.
The personal CV might best be described as colourfully varied. Not many could name drop face to face assistance to many famous politicians as I can do - for example you will have heard of Glenda Jackson and perhaps even Francis Maude - and be able to say that while in 25 years the reports were mainly good because of hard work and ability, and yet they never got promotion. Obviously that has had financial repercussions. Similarly, few would claim that they first had a brief personal relationship at 19 and then not another one until the age of 42 while in parallel there were dozens of close long-term friends who were, well, just friends. Very, very, good friends but friends.
There were actually two relationships at 42 and 43. Both lasted just a matter of a few months. It was all too late really. My parents were getting older. They could need care - or was it that I would need care when they virtually departed as it would be like losing the parental part of me? Just before my unexpected redundancy at 48, I was feeling that everything I had fought was coming back to attack me. Life for everyone was more competitive. People were operating in a cut-throat way. One slight blunder and they would seize on it for all it was worth. In short, everywhere had become more dangerous. Too dangerous to cope with. Three years on, I've never been back to London and can barely travel a few miles alone. But one thing you should know is that the brightest people are also the least capable and the thickest in many respects. That is just concealed - or exhibited - in a variety of ways.
All very interesting if this thread was actually all about YOU.
However, I don't appreciate being called arrogant. I would describe it as ambitious. The thing is, when people said I was not interested in anyone else's opinion, that's not true. What im not interested is people telling me im arrogant and my opinion is wrong and im naive, and that's not the kind of replies I asked for in the title. What I asked for was if people felt the same.
I did. But now I'd do anything to go back and not have the responsibilities being 'grown up' entails. Don't be so eager to wish your life away OP.
i'd love to be a kid again,
those days were carefree
in answer to the question, no, i don't think i ever really had the longing to grow up- a lot of it had to do with not knowing what i wanted from life
it's okay getting all this control and being your own person, but what do you do when you have all that control and you don't know what to do with it anyway
anyway, it's so over rated people say, oh i can't wait to grow up, i can't wait to do things myself, then they grow up and wish to be a kid again (most of the time) because they can't handle it
However, I don't appreciate being called arrogant. I would describe it as ambitious. The thing is, when people said I was not interested in anyone else's opinion, that's not true. What im not interested is people telling me im arrogant and my opinion is wrong and im naive, and that's not the kind of replies I asked for in the title. What I asked for was if people felt the same.
I wish my kid was more like you. I don't think you're arrogant, just ambitious and there's nothing wrong with that. Carry on working hard at school, pass your exams and follow your dreams. If you want to go to University, make sure you pick a degree that is actually useful, medicine, teaching, engineering etc something that is always needed and where there are always vacancies and hopefully you won't end up in a crappy dead end job but I get the feeling that if you did, it would only be temporary, you seem the type to keep moving on up.
PS don't ruin it by getting pregnant, or impregnating anyone else because that's how most of us get ourselves lumbered with shit jobs with no escape route. Stay young free and single for as long as possible.
As for being independent, wait until you are in the career of your choice first and try to buy. You'll get a taste of independent living if you get into University, enjoy the freedom but learn to cook. Don't rush into leaving home properly because If you rent somewhere as a teenager, you'll end up working all hours in any old job to keep afloat as you watch all your cash get eaten up by rent.
This isn't really me asking for advice, more opinions.
Did anyone else feel like me, a fifteen year old when they were my age, not being able to wait to grow up!
I just can't wait to be independent. There's something really appealing to me about having my own flat/house, making my own money, getting a good job, being where I want to be, and just being able to be my own person, make my own decisions, rule my won life and how I choose to live it!
I really crave success right now - I can't wait to do something I feel motivated about - surely you feel more motivated about your job, than your school years, becuase firstly, you're earning money, and most of the time, you're doing something you enjoy! Being a success when I grow up is important to me - I have a rough idea of what career area I'd like to be in, and I would LOVE some day to start a business, and really show what I can do! I just hope that my life turns out so that this is possible!
So, yeah did anyone feel really anxious to grow up when they were my age?
ha ha, ha ha,ha ha, ha ha, ha ha, ha ha, ha ha, ha ha, ha ha, ha ha, ha ha, ha ha, ha ha, ha ha, ha ha, ha ha, ha ha, ha ha,
Oh! To still be that young and naive!
Sweetie, enjoy what you still have. The novelty of being grown up and all those things that you describe so lovingly soon become millstones round your neck!
As for your career aspirations you need to take a walk onto any professional forum and see what people are saying there about their career prospects. Being bright, clever and having a good degree from a high ranking university can mean absolutely nothing if you don't have the connections and the people skills to fit in.
And you should also realise that the vast majority of people in ANY job are simply there for the money!
Not to rain on your parade, or anything, but it's a really hard world out there.You need to make the most of what you have now and stop wasting time on dreaming about the fantastic future that you might be lucky enough to achieve.
All very interesting if this thread was actually all about YOU.
The bold and the capitals indicate to me that you are a shouter. You have jumped at a surface conclusion that entirely misses the motive which is self-sacrificing and giving. I am showing by example what can happen when individuals are not fully aware of the circumstances they may face. I am also showing what things they might encounter. For example, a world of individuals who operate aggressively, reveal little, teach nothing and assume no one gives anyone anything. I have often found that such folk have been parented very poorly and yet have been rewarded by the system. On the basis of your contribution, I would imagine you have been very successful.
Comments
I hope you do as well, but having the resources is only 1 part of a bigger problem. And I bet everyone of these people thought the same
40% of recent graduates unemployed?
A survey by totaljobs.com, reported by several newspapers, claimed that 40% of graduates were still looking for work six months after graduating. Enjoy your life now because it only gets harder, being at school and at home is the easy part of life.
I don't really understand how the above stops you from enjoying life; to stop relying on mummy and daddy doesn't suddenly mean life ends. For me, it began.
The only problem I have is that I don't have a career. I still don't know what I'd like to do (probably too late now, even if I did find something I enjoy), so I don't like working, but I like the freedom that comes with working so I'm pretty indifferent about it. I guess that's the problem - if I hated my job that much I would give myself a kick up the backside and have a serious think about what I want, but the whole career/work thing has never appealed to me. As long as I'm getting paid at the end of the day for it, then I'm pretty happy to do whatever the job is, as it allows me to go and do what I enjoy and want to do with my life.
I also think people are just picking on your "call centre" comment for the sake of it. It's not like you've come out and said they're all scum. Not wanting to work in a call centre is fine - good for you. I see no reason not to express that opinion, besides, you were merely making a point, rather than disrespecting those who work in one. Some may not see a problem working in them, others would hope never to go near such a place. It doesn't mean you think anything less of anyone working there, it just isn't a job that appeals to you - nothing wrong with that.
Oh for goodness' sake, you have gotten the wrong end of the stick. I've apologigized for the way I came across, but I feel you've taken this personally, and are being a bit silly.
And also, why do you think im not interested in anyones opinion? If that were the case why would I have started a thread asking for opinins?
Yes you did. You've got a lot to learn. You sound very naive. You may be academically smart, but that will only get you so far, you need to be emotionally astute aswell. I suggest you work on that.
If you can't see that saying ' I won't be working in a call centre' is using that as an example of a low paid low skilled job that the OP would feel beneath his/her talents then I think you are missing something.
I've put this down to the general arrogance of youth. It's an attitude I recognise from my own kids. As they got older they learned a bit of humility. It was a maturity thing rather than being inherently snobbish. I encouraged them to see themselves as very fortunate to have the chance to use their talents in a job that excited them.
Nope, I think that it's you that was being silly. But as you're young, we'll put it down to your lack of interaction with anyone other than academics.
I think you need to grow up life is very very hard and your not special to others, your spelling is not that good, nevertheless I wish I was again 15 that was over 45 years ago
I went to a very competitive school as well, and a hugely competitive university. Both were still less responsibility than working life.
I notice you selectively quoted my post. The rest of it is equally as relevant, and in real life you can't choose to ignore things like finances. What you'll enjoy working on is irrelevant, as at the end of the day you'll have to pay the bills, and that might just mean doing a job you hate because you can't get anything else in a difficult job market, no matter how entitled you think you are.
Hate to break it to you, but just because you think you're suitable for or entitled to a particular job or level of job doesn't mean you're going to get it, and the sooner you take off the rose-tinted spectacles, the better.
And the superior attitude isn't going to get you anywhere except on the path to a whole pile of rejection letters. From the way you're coming across, I think you'd need to learn a bit more humility and respect for others' jobs before you even think about the world of work. You're no more entitled than anyone else, and neither am I.
Resources are irrelevant if there aren't the jobs to be had. In a difficult economic climate you have to take whatever job you can get, if you can get one at all. There are plenty of talented people who are unemployed through no choice of their own, so I think you're being a little too naïve in thinking you'll just waltz into a high-level job because of the school you went to and your skills. But times have changed, and often nowadays that's simply not enough.
I see it as you've got a great belief in yourself at a young age and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that.
I've no doubt that as the years pass and you gain more experience of the world some of your opinions will change, at the moment enjoy your youth and your ambitions, avoid all the negative comments they're really not worth your time.
Chase your dreams and aspirations, learn above all else that there are some people who will gladly try to bring you down.
In spite of the numerous posts in this thread wishing their adulthood away, it's pretty shit to be 15 - you can't go to pubs, you can't go to clubs, you can't drive, you have to be home by 11, you have to go to school, you're at least ten years away from the excitement of real love, and you can't have sex. So it's quite normal to want to grow up, and no-one in their right mind really wants to go back to being 15 (25, maybe).
Do remember the following:
1. It's easier not to start smoking than it is to stop.
2. If you allow your teeth to go rotten, it will cost thousands to put them right.
3. Wearing suncreen prevents wrinkles.
4. The only person you will ever know who always acts unconditionally in your best interests, even if it doesn't always feel like it, is your mother; and someday she will be gone.
5. Your life belongs to you, and only you have the power to make it how you want it.
Sound advice, but unfortunately, point 4 simply is all too often a mere saccharin-sweet fairytale for many.
I think yours is an interesting post and my feeling is that you may well do better than many. If you can feel as you do in the current climate, then I am sure it will be suited to you. You must, though, try to work out in your mind how each situation is likely to feel, consider the right balance between working life and social life, and crucially recognise what you will need to do in each decade because of your age and the ages of those in your family. Much of it may seem a long way off and it does sound like a boring chore. But do ask yourself when will you be able to have children if you want them, what age you will be when they will need adult financial support and what demands ultimately there might be on you in middle age from your parents. You also need to develop awareness about the character and extent of your capabilities. All these things will minimise stress and disappointments.
As a child, I looked younger than my age but I was seen as bright. I spoke and behaved in a positive way but was perceived as unusually parental. Teachers would get me to share the teaching duties with them or put me in charge of the class in their temporary absence. This sounds like a recipe for weirdo like unpopularity but actually I was very popular with adults and children alike. Kids experiencing problems would ask me for advice. Parents who had problems and couldn't manage their unruly children sent them in my direction. My non shouty welcoming manner would of itself make them happy and contented. I also did my bit in a predominantly white school for race relations.
What I and others didn't appreciate was that I was the least suited of all of them for the new adult world. When I passed the eleven plus with flying colours, some others' parents treated it as if it were like landing on the moon while others exhibited jealousy. It was the first time that I felt adults could be bizarre and rather immature. While I mildly shrugged all of it off, it was sadly typical. On arriving at an achievers' school full of people who were far more wealthy than me, it wasn't at all as I and others expected. I wasn't at all ready for their ability, the squabbling between each other, their criticism of teachers, their condemning attitude of the less wealthy and most of all the competition. I also missed my friends and being on familiar turf even though I was a day pupil, while pretending everything was ok. Within months, I went from being the local superstar into a dysfunctional individual who was placed on anti-depressants for a month or two at aged 12, 1 month. That didn't happen again until the age of 32.
The remainder of my seven years there were focussed on not being the one with the lowest test results. Ultimately I got good enough O'levels and A'levels and couldn't comprehend how several of the most arrogant and apparently intelligent people dropped out or did less well. Having been an open person until 11, I could hardly say a word to anyone for the entire time I was there and found eye contact difficult. When I left at 18, it felt like I was breathing for the first time in seven years. What it left me with was a feeling that I had been too middle aged to be a teenager and yet too young to be a teenager too. Going first into employment and then forcing myself to go to university, I didn't believe I would survive the experience, let alone flourish. At 20, I felt that I couldn't really be 20 but rather somehow had to try to be the missing 16 year old with other 20 year olds when still feeling I was also about 12.
What strikes me now is the extent of my naivety. I was willing to sacrifice ever getting a degree in order to prove to myself that I could feel acclimatised in the young adult world. I made many friends who liked my personality as I self-deprecatingly dumbed down. I had an extremely active social life which was full of light humour and camaraderie which I would never have believed was ever possible. But they always had to bang on my door and pull me out as I found it so difficult to anticipate being in social situations that I even avoided streets in daylight.
There was a sense of shelter in that group which was the closest that I could find to my only child status when being with other people of a similar age. Yes, they took the mick but it wasn't all aimed at me and there were common interests although I always felt very defensive. I liked the fact that we went to places that were often frequented by much older people. They felt more comforting. In contrast, the average student group seemed showy and almost threatening. As it happened, I got a good degree and I guess at 22 I felt that my more troubled past was behind me. But I didn't have a clue about the workplace. I was entirely unprepared for office politics, people seeing what they could get away with, those privately networking to get promotion and the instinct to make money. I had no interest in making money whatsoever. It seemed almost irrelevant and pretty crazily I probably even said so.
There was competitiveness. It emerged in places where it didn't matter to actual life like in table tennis matches at lunchtime which were always both serious and funny. But from the word go, I felt sickened by what I saw as the failings of successful managers - their remoteness, pomposity, unwillingness to praise anyone and obvious self-promotion. I tried so hard to get on with them but there was an absence of chemistry. I would have been better off being self-employed. Mostly I was seen by the few who worked to me as inexplicably encouraging of them and rewarding while my managers saw me as a soft touch. Sometimes when throwing myself into the social life linked to the office I clumsily became embroiled in minor scrapes. These could occur at times of acute anxiety, for example during my parents' illness. This not only soured the relationship with bosses but hurt me badly as I was the one who went out of his way generally to do everything exactly by the book. It wasn't at all my sort of norm.
Ultimately I went to work in London, briefed Government Ministers, attended committees in the UN, was a regular at football matches, enjoyed hundreds of gigs in places like Brixton and went to the Glastonbury Festival ten times. I started buying my own flat at 29 and I had driven a car since 18. But I never had a day in work when I didn't wake up and think it was impossible to face the world. Every morning was accompanied by clawing onto the bed and feeling reluctant to leave that womb. Every serious transaction with people in the office would be accompanied by anxiety although in light social chat I felt fine. My first breakdown was at 32 and ostensibly triggered by noisy neighbours but it went much deeper. There were then years that followed which were comparatively problem free and years of short-term psychological illness. Generally we all referred to them as blips. The stiff upper lip.
The personal CV might best be described as colourfully varied. Not many could name drop face to face assistance to many famous politicians as I can do - for example you will have heard of Glenda Jackson and perhaps even Francis Maude - and be able to say that while in 25 years the reports were mainly good because of hard work and ability, and yet they never got promotion. Obviously that has had financial repercussions. Similarly, few would claim that they first had a brief personal relationship at 19 and then not another one until the age of 42 while in parallel there were dozens of close long-term friends who were, well, just friends. Very, very, good friends but friends.
There were actually two relationships at 42 and 43. Both lasted just a matter of a few months. It was all too late really. My parents were getting older. They could need care - or was it that I would need care when they virtually departed as it would be like losing the parental part of me? Just before my unexpected redundancy at 48, I was feeling that everything I had fought was coming back to attack me. Life for everyone was more competitive. People were operating in a cut-throat way. One slight blunder and they would seize on it for all it was worth. In short, everywhere had become more dangerous. Too dangerous to cope with. Three years on, I've never been back to London and can barely travel a few miles alone. But one thing you should know is that the brightest people are also the least capable and the thickest in many respects. That is just concealed - or exhibited - in a variety of ways.
I’ll let you in on a secret; “there’s no such thing as a ‘career path’ really..... it’s just crazy-paving that you have to lay yourself”. ;-)
As for being 15 and wanting to be independent as soon as possible, don't fret too much about it, it won't be long until you are experiencing independence at uni. I could say that you shouldn't wish your life away but I remember feeling like you at your age. I'm sure your intelligent enough to know that there will be struggles along the way and adult life might not work out exactly as is planned but hard work should see you fine.
Good luck!
All very interesting if this thread was actually all about YOU.
However, I don't appreciate being called arrogant. I would describe it as ambitious. The thing is, when people said I was not interested in anyone else's opinion, that's not true. What im not interested is people telling me im arrogant and my opinion is wrong and im naive, and that's not the kind of replies I asked for in the title. What I asked for was if people felt the same.
i'd love to be a kid again,
those days were carefree
in answer to the question, no, i don't think i ever really had the longing to grow up- a lot of it had to do with not knowing what i wanted from life
it's okay getting all this control and being your own person, but what do you do when you have all that control and you don't know what to do with it anyway
anyway, it's so over rated people say, oh i can't wait to grow up, i can't wait to do things myself, then they grow up and wish to be a kid again (most of the time) because they can't handle it
I wish my kid was more like you. I don't think you're arrogant, just ambitious and there's nothing wrong with that. Carry on working hard at school, pass your exams and follow your dreams. If you want to go to University, make sure you pick a degree that is actually useful, medicine, teaching, engineering etc something that is always needed and where there are always vacancies and hopefully you won't end up in a crappy dead end job but I get the feeling that if you did, it would only be temporary, you seem the type to keep moving on up.
PS don't ruin it by getting pregnant, or impregnating anyone else because that's how most of us get ourselves lumbered with shit jobs with no escape route. Stay young free and single for as long as possible.
As for being independent, wait until you are in the career of your choice first and try to buy. You'll get a taste of independent living if you get into University, enjoy the freedom but learn to cook. Don't rush into leaving home properly because If you rent somewhere as a teenager, you'll end up working all hours in any old job to keep afloat as you watch all your cash get eaten up by rent.
ha ha, ha ha,ha ha, ha ha, ha ha, ha ha, ha ha, ha ha, ha ha, ha ha, ha ha, ha ha, ha ha, ha ha, ha ha, ha ha, ha ha, ha ha,
Oh! To still be that young and naive!
Sweetie, enjoy what you still have. The novelty of being grown up and all those things that you describe so lovingly soon become millstones round your neck!
As for your career aspirations you need to take a walk onto any professional forum and see what people are saying there about their career prospects. Being bright, clever and having a good degree from a high ranking university can mean absolutely nothing if you don't have the connections and the people skills to fit in.
And you should also realise that the vast majority of people in ANY job are simply there for the money!
Not to rain on your parade, or anything, but it's a really hard world out there.You need to make the most of what you have now and stop wasting time on dreaming about the fantastic future that you might be lucky enough to achieve.
The bold and the capitals indicate to me that you are a shouter. You have jumped at a surface conclusion that entirely misses the motive which is self-sacrificing and giving. I am showing by example what can happen when individuals are not fully aware of the circumstances they may face. I am also showing what things they might encounter. For example, a world of individuals who operate aggressively, reveal little, teach nothing and assume no one gives anyone anything. I have often found that such folk have been parented very poorly and yet have been rewarded by the system. On the basis of your contribution, I would imagine you have been very successful.